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25 Oct 99 - 03:57 PM (#127865) Subject: Mudcat Almanac (October 25) From: Peter T. October 25: a blustery day, especially for lovers of the original Winnie-the-Pooh.
Reports suggest that the Monsanto company has a new breakthrough product -- they are going to be producing a lamb mixed with genes from the mint plant, so that you can have lamb and mint sauce without buying mint sauce. Duck a l'orange is next. This comes from earlier experiments with cream of parrot soup, which is the world's only soup that asks for its own crackers. In preparation for winter remember that drinking from the hot water bottle creates kidney stones and undermines trust in relationships. |
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25 Oct 99 - 06:43 PM (#127917) Subject: RE: Mudcat Almanac (October 25) From: kendall I heard a rumor that Harley-Davidson is going to market its own brand of computers.. it will be released as soon as they figure a way to make it leak oil.. |
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25 Oct 99 - 10:30 PM (#127993) Subject: RE: Mudcat Almanac (October 25) From: Bill D with these days of corporate mergers, the next big one seems to be between Betty Crocker & Budwiser...the rumor is that they have a new product planned, too..... PisQuick.... |
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25 Oct 99 - 10:30 PM (#127994) Subject: RE: Mudcat Almanac (October 25) From: Bill D with these days of corporate mergers, the next big one seems to be between Betty Crocker & Budwiser...the rumor is that they have a new product planned, too..... PisQuick.... |
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25 Oct 99 - 10:47 PM (#128002) Subject: RE: Mudcat Almanac (October 25) From: sophocleese Gee Peter T. now I know why Mr. Bean had such problems. Couldn't figure it out before you told me that. Are Monsanto working on Butterball turkeys yet or have they covered them all ready? |
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26 Oct 99 - 07:41 AM (#128111) Subject: RE: Mudcat Almanac (October 25) From: katlaughing For some reason this seems to fit here. Have a laugh and Peter, i love theses threads! A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window saying: "HELP WANTED. Must be able to type, must be good with a computer and must be bilingual. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer." A short time afterwards, a dog trotted up to the window, saw the sign and went inside. He looked at the receptionist and wagged his tail, then walked over to the sign, looked at it and whined. Getting the idea, the receptionist got the office manager. The office manager looked at the dog and was surprised, to say the least. However, the dog looked determined, so he led him into the office. Inside, the dog jumped up on the chair and stared at the manager The manager said, "I can't hire you. The sign says you have to be able to type." The dog jumped down, went to the typewriter and proceeded to type out a perfect letter. He took out the page and trotted over to the manager and gave it to him, then jumped back on the chair. The manager was stunned, but then told the dog, "The sign says you have to be good with a computer." The dog jumped down again and went to the computer. The dog proceeded to demonstrate his expertise with various programs and produced a sample spreadsheet and database and presented them to the manager. By this time the manager was totally dumbfounded! He looked at the dog and said, "I realize that you are a very intelligent dog and have some interesting abilities. However, I still can't give you the job." The dog jumped down and went to a copy of the sign and put his paw on the part about being an Equal Opportunity Employer.
The manager said, "Yes, but the sign also says that you have to be bilingual." The dog looked at him straight in the face and said, "Meow."
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26 Oct 99 - 11:34 AM (#128186) Subject: RE: Mudcat Almanac (October 25) From: Rex Going back to the top, now and then I go hunting for rabbits in the Western part of South Park once known as the Bayou Salado. Those rabbits live mostly on the sagebrush which is about all that grows there. So when you fix them in a stew or just by themselves you don't need much seasoning as they already have a good tint of sage. On the other hand, I don't hunt for the long-eared Abert squirrels that live in and feed on mostly Ponderosa Pine trees. Pine flavored meat. Whew! Rex |