Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!

12 Oct 15 - 06:55 PM (#3743431)
Subject: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Andy7

Okay, so it's my turn to sing! Hands start sweating, whole verses suddenly disappear from my memory, shouldn't have had that third glass of beer … I know I'm going to totally mess up the song that I've been practising all week!

And I do mess it up … forget some chords, miss out a verse or two, voice isn't really there …

And yet, I'm rewarded with a polite round of applause. Aw, thanks, guys!

Then the following week … practised even harder, recorded it on the mobile to listen to and check, and it sounded just right, not too much beer before I sing … and it all goes perfectly according to plan! Excellent!

… and I'm rewarded with a polite round of applause.

Let's try really praising each other a bit more often! It's great that we're so welcoming, and that we applaud everyone; but if I do something a bit special, please come up and tell me so in the break! And I'll try to do that for you, too!

I'm just as guilty as anyone … sometimes, I'll absolutely love someone's singing or playing, but I'll just clap politely, and then someone else starts singing, and I never do say anything to the performer that I loved.

But I really believe we should make a bit more of an effort! If a beginner sings or plays something rather well … maybe they only just learned how to fingerpick, or their voice really suits a particular song … let's praise them! And if a professional suddenly moves us with their performance, or plays one of their songs especially well, let's praise them too!

I'm not talking about praising anything and everything; but to make a difference between our usual respectful applause, and words of genuine praise - either immediately after the song (if we're sitting nearby) or in the break - when someone plays or sings something a bit special!

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12 Oct 15 - 07:08 PM (#3743436)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: GUEST,#

Screw the praise. Show me the money.

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13 Oct 15 - 04:30 AM (#3743494)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Waddon Pete

Well that didn't take long, did it! I think it's a good idea, but don't expect a wonderful change overnight. I think the original poster deserves praise....not a tmr!

Peter

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13 Oct 15 - 04:57 AM (#3743496)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Leadfingers

I think that the (particularly) UK folk scene is far too polite with regard to Floor singers . It doesn't seem to matter how bad a floor singer is , they always get 'polite applause' Like Andy , there have been occasions when I have really screwed a song up , but still had applause . Basically , we applaud anyone who makes the effort to perform .

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13 Oct 15 - 05:14 AM (#3743498)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Joe Offer

Aw Pete, # is just trying to have fun. I know # to be One of the Good Ones.

I agree with Andy. I respectfully disagree with Leadfingers, whom I know to be a good guy and an excellent musician. I'm a pretty good singer, but I've gotten flak all my life from musicians who think they're better than I am and therefore not worthy to perform in their presence. I've done this stuff long enough and prominently enough that I think I should be accepted anywhere in Folkdom, but I find I have to stay away from a number of music gatherings that have rules that are too restrictive or attitudes that are too snooty.

That's just not right. Folk music is supposed to be Music of the People, but too many folk musicians expect other singers to be of commercial quality. If we don't support and applaud beginning singers, what will motivate them to keep trying?

-Joe-

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13 Oct 15 - 10:00 AM (#3743574)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: GUEST,Pete from seven stars link

Totally agree, and sometimes I would settle for people just actually listening !

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13 Oct 15 - 10:54 AM (#3743584)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: maeve

I don't especially need or expect praise, but careful listening and straightforward feedback are golden. Tom Hall "Curmudgeon" once gave me two sentences that showed he both listened carefully and understood what I was aiming for, and that he thought I had achieved it. That carried me for a couple of years.

Thank you again, Tom. You felt crummy but found the time and energy to encourage. I miss you.

Maeve

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13 Oct 15 - 10:59 AM (#3743586)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Tattie Bogle

We even applaud those people lucky enough to win the folk club raffle. Why?

But it is nice to get - not just applause, but some positive feedback in the way of personal comments, especially when you are newish to performing and need some encouragement. But as Andy suggests, you can and should still be self-critical when you know you've screwed up, while another part of the learning curve is being able to cover up and carry on, and keep smiling through as if that bum note was meant to happen! Then fewer people will notice than if you get all flustered and apologetic or have to stop and re-start.

And what is also good, if you have put together an event and done your best to look after your artistes well, they take the trouble to phone or email afterwards to say how much they enjoyed the event - as happened this last weekend with one band.

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13 Oct 15 - 11:49 AM (#3743603)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Richard Mellish

I agree with the OP. Anything from moderately bad to pretty good seems to get the same amount of applause. Absolutely bloody dire gets perhaps slightly less, but not much less. Really brilliant gets only a bit more.

When I have particularly enjoyed a performance I do say so if I get the chance. And if I have disliked something and get the change to speak to that performer afterwards I do sometimes say how I think it could have been better: e.g. play quieter so we can hear the words, or take as long as necessary to make sure the guitar is in tune.

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13 Oct 15 - 01:02 PM (#3743623)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: GUEST

I think we do often need a bit more light and shade in our responses. Too often the same polite applause greets the good floor singer and the excruciatingly bad one.
I am sparing with my applause if I think a performance is in the latter category. But more importantly, perhaps, is that I also try to say something positive to anyone whose singing or playing I've enjoyed. This might include the paid guest performers, who are human beings just like the rest of us, but also the people I see and hear regularly. It might not happen until the end of the evening when we're all shuffling about and geting ready to go home, but I do try to seek out someone who's helped me enjoy the evening, and tell them so. If we all did this more often, it might help to encourage the good performers. (And I love it when I'm on the receiving end!).

Marje

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13 Oct 15 - 01:20 PM (#3743628)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Bat Goddess

A simple word of encouragement means so much to anyone getting up the nerve to perform in front of other people. It costs nothing and is so much appreciated.

Add a bit of helpful advice if you want.

It still means a lot to me even now when someone, especially someone I admire, tells me they enjoy my singing or my harmony or the way I handled a difficult situation.

Even comparatively experienced singers can have some self doubt.

Thanks, Maeve, for your kind sweet words about Curmudgeon. He influenced and encouraged so many people, and perhaps me more than anyone. I miss him and his advice and encouragement.

Linn

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13 Oct 15 - 02:48 PM (#3743659)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Steve Gardham

I must be lucky in the places I go to. A good performance from anyone is met with rapturous applause and all sorts of other appreciative noises. Personally whenever I get the chance if I've enjoyed somebody's performance I will tell them even if it's only the next time I see them.

And yes if that lady stands up with her mobile phone and scrolls up and down and loses her place several times singing the same verses over and over a song that everybody else knows backwards anyway I will still applaud politely at the end, because that's who we are!

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13 Oct 15 - 03:41 PM (#3743681)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: GUEST,leeneia

There's more to a performance than vocal quality. A person may have a bad voice but be singing a song that's quite interesting, rare or witty. That is something worth applauding.

We don't all have to be music critics.

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13 Oct 15 - 04:26 PM (#3743685)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Andy7

I totally agree! We should all enjoy singing - it's a primeval human experience that belongs to us all.

Far too many people these days say, "Oh, I can't sing", just because a teacher told them that at the age of 7, or they watched some talent show on TV and think that if you can't sing like the 'best' in the world, it's not worth opening your mouth.

I once performed for a while as one half of a duo; and occasionally I almost felt like crying after a performance, because her voice was so lovely, and mine so average.

But I still love singing ... because it's such a great (if sometimes scary!) experience; and I still have many songs in my heart that I like to share.

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13 Oct 15 - 05:10 PM (#3743701)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: GUEST,Fyldeplyer

My wife usually gets the praise after our gigs and quite right to. We also let performers know we have been moved by their music. Applause is a strange beast, a quiet intense piece often receives similar applause, whilst a brisk up tempo tune gets whoops and hoolas!! It's only at the end of evening that people directly express their true depth of interest. Leadfingers is someone who has always been post performance positive but his observations are sound that we sometimes are too polite. But that's who we are.

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13 Oct 15 - 07:43 PM (#3743723)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Amos

I, for one, believe in the polite round of applause as a baseline of acknowledgement for anyone who has the brass to stand up and put out a song in front of strangers. I am comfortable with it from long experience, but to neophytes it can be a frightening experience.

Above and beyond that there are all kinds of additional fervor to be thrown into the mix. My favorite is personal conversations from people who like something I do and take the trouble to tell me so. For the small handful in the crowd who dig a number, my sense of satisfaction is unbounded and it is what makes working up a song worthwhile.

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13 Oct 15 - 08:27 PM (#3743731)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Andy7

"I, for one, believe in the polite round of applause as a baseline of acknowledgement for anyone who has the brass to stand up and put out a song in front of strangers."

Very nicely said! Yes, we should always applaud such musical courage.

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14 Oct 15 - 10:34 AM (#3743854)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: GUEST,leeneia

Andy, I've been thinking about your first post, how you said that one night your chords were perfect, etc, and nobody said anything.

?But would it really make you feel good if somebody said, "Nice job, Andy, no mistakes this time. And your voice didn't let you down!"

I'm pretty sure it wouldn't make you feel good. Therefore I think you should let YOURSELF praise yourself when a song goes especially well, quietly building your own confidence.

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14 Oct 15 - 12:41 PM (#3743883)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Amos

Leenia's wisdom shines through. In the final analysis, the only applause that counts is that which you award to yourself. This is not obvious, because it so gratifying to be bathed in clapping, but it is the spiritual equivalent of loving sugared cola drinks overmuch.

A

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25 Oct 15 - 07:35 PM (#3746622)
Subject: RE: Let's All Praise Each Other A Bit More!
From: Andy7

Yes, very nice comments from the last 2 posters.

We should respect and praise ourselves, and genuinely accept that respect and praise from ourselves, every bit as much as we accept and value praise from others.

After all, we are so often the most unforgiving critics of our own performances. So, let's lap it up, when sometimes we do hear that praise from ourselves!

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