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BS: Questions w/o Answers

14 Jul 16 - 01:22 PM (#3800270)
Subject: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

What is wrong with you?

What is the exact charge of a singularity?

What is the airspeed of a coconut laden swallow?


14 Jul 16 - 02:36 PM (#3800281)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Jack the Sailor

Who cares?
Is usually rhetorical.


14 Jul 16 - 03:03 PM (#3800283)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Dave Hanson

Is that an African or European swallow ?

Dave H


14 Jul 16 - 03:40 PM (#3800290)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Mr Red

What's the difference between a duck?


14 Jul 16 - 04:22 PM (#3800292)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

Aqua or shoe?


14 Jul 16 - 04:23 PM (#3800294)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: DMcG

Have you ever played that game where every answer has to be a question itself?


14 Jul 16 - 04:28 PM (#3800295)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

Do you mean like in whose line is it anyway?


14 Jul 16 - 04:31 PM (#3800296)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: DMcG

That's a television program, isn't it?


14 Jul 16 - 04:47 PM (#3800297)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

It isn't chopped liver is it? BEEEP oh crap


14 Jul 16 - 04:57 PM (#3800300)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: DMcG

We once played a variation of it in my office when someone came in. The added feature was that it had to be sufficiently subtle that the visitor didn't notice. Sort of starting with a 'Can I help you?' and finishing with 'Is there anything else you need?"


14 Jul 16 - 08:01 PM (#3800314)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: beeliner

Mr. Red(above): "What's the difference between a duck?"

The traditional answer is "One leg is both the same."


14 Jul 16 - 08:49 PM (#3800319)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Bill D

If a hen and a half could lay an egg and a half in a day and a half, how long would it take a cross-eyed grasshopper with a wooden leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

My father asked us kids that 65+ years ago, and I still don't know the answer, so I refrain from easier questions about singularities.


14 Jul 16 - 09:05 PM (#3800320)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Joe_F

Jack:
Does another question count as an answer?
Why not?


14 Jul 16 - 09:24 PM (#3800322)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Steve Shaw

Must it be? (Beethoven): "Muss es sein?" Scrawled over the beginning of the last movement of his last string quartet, the last complete work he composed.


15 Jul 16 - 02:02 AM (#3800331)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Ebbie

Each answer in the form of a question? Not 'Whose Line is It?' but isn't it 'Jeopardy'? Am I mistaken?


15 Jul 16 - 05:17 AM (#3800349)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Georgiansilver

Ebbie.. which of your three questions does the 'Am I mistaken refer to~?


15 Jul 16 - 05:38 AM (#3800351)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Jim Carroll

How many beans make five - what would you rather be or a wasp - what's the difference between a stoat or a weasel (which has an answer)?
Jim Carroll


15 Jul 16 - 05:40 AM (#3800352)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Raggytash

How are things in Glocca Morra?


15 Jul 16 - 06:16 AM (#3800357)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Mr Red

this fine day?


15 Jul 16 - 06:29 AM (#3800358)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Nigel Parsons

There will always be questions without answers because "there are more questions than answers."
Johnny Nash?


15 Jul 16 - 08:06 AM (#3800367)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: mkebenn

How much wood could a woodchuck... oh hell, what am I doing? Mike


15 Jul 16 - 08:58 AM (#3800378)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Rapparee

What will England do now?

The US: going with the flow or just drifting?

How many roads must a man walk down?

Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawn shop?


15 Jul 16 - 12:26 PM (#3800408)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Megan L

Reularly asked by American tourists at Edinburgh castle "what time is the one o'clock gun fired?"


15 Jul 16 - 12:44 PM (#3800409)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Senoufou

Asked apparently every day by customers in Poundland shops,
"How much is this please?" (This has an answer obviously)

"Do you speak African?" (Have been asked this many times)

"Which one of you weed on the toaster?" (To our Siamese cats)


15 Jul 16 - 12:57 PM (#3800412)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Kenny B (inactive)

From my Grandfather

If it takes a man a week to walk a fortnight how many apples are there
in a barrel of grapes?


15 Jul 16 - 01:14 PM (#3800416)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Steve Shaw

"What will England do now?"

Simple. Appoint a new manager as quickly as possible, preferably foreign, and stop picking Rooney.


16 Jul 16 - 03:33 AM (#3800493)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Mr Red

"what time is the one o'clock gun fired?"

BST, GMT, DST, CET? or even - EST or PT?

Lunctime obviously!


16 Jul 16 - 06:53 AM (#3800510)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Steve Shaw

PMT..


16 Jul 16 - 07:35 AM (#3800513)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Hrothgar

If you play cricket with a cricket bat, what do you play with a wombat?


16 Jul 16 - 07:55 AM (#3800515)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Steve Shaw

Wom.


16 Jul 16 - 08:24 AM (#3800520)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Senoufou

Hahaha Steve! There must also be a game called Ding.


16 Jul 16 - 11:22 AM (#3800531)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: gnu

Steve Shaw - PM
Date: 15 Jul 16 - 01:14 PM

Hahahahahaa!!!! I LOVE IT!


16 Jul 16 - 07:11 PM (#3800606)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

Steve who will shut down the Chunnel due to Brexit, England or France?


16 Jul 16 - 07:17 PM (#3800608)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Steve Shaw

I imagine that a slight tectonic movement may one day do the trick. I'd better consult my geological maps.


16 Jul 16 - 08:10 PM (#3800618)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Joe_F

I have heard that a question often asked by visitors to the Grand Canyon is "What tools did they use?" I do not know how the park rangers answer this, but I think I would be speechless.

It turns out that among those who assume that the Grand Canyon is artificial, some think it was built by indigenous Americans for religious purposes, and others that it was cooked up during the New Deal as a way to reduce unemployment. No doubt it would serve admirably either way.


16 Jul 16 - 08:30 PM (#3800622)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Steve Shaw

I'll swear I saw an episode of The Flintstones which showed the Grand Canyon as a tiny crack under Fred's feet with just a trickle of water in it. A man who I disliked intensely once came with us to Malham Tarn, a natural lake formed on the Mid-Craven Fault in the Yorkshire Dales which inspired The Water Babies by Charles Kingsley (a work marred by a bit of of-its-day bigotry, unfortunately). He swore blind that it was a man-made lake and got quite nasty when I gently explained to him its geological origins. Nature and time can sometimes soften human handiwork, but the Grand Canyon and Malham Tarn are both beyond reproach!


17 Jul 16 - 03:01 AM (#3800645)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Mr Red

I imagine that a slight tectonic movement may one day do the trick. I'd better consult my geological maps.
apparently the kinks in the Thames through London are evidence of tectonic activity, which is ongoing if only visible as political shifts this month.


17 Jul 16 - 05:48 AM (#3800665)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Senoufou

Where does the line, "Answer came there none..." come from? It seems to have emerged this morning from the sludge which calls itself my memory!


17 Jul 16 - 09:33 AM (#3800696)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Kenny B (inactive)

Senoufou - Walrus and the Carpenter?

"O Oysters,' said the Carpenter,
      You've had a pleasant run!
Shall we be trotting home again?'
      But answer came there none —
And this was scarcely odd, because
      They'd eaten every one."



Ps I Googled it


17 Jul 16 - 09:47 AM (#3800697)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Pete from seven stars link

Re the duck legs....are you ducking the question !?


17 Jul 16 - 10:22 AM (#3800701)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Senoufou

Ah thank you Kenny! I know, I should have Googled it myself.
I used to say "Answer came there none!" sometimes to my class if nobody put their hand up.


17 Jul 16 - 10:36 AM (#3800707)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Kenny B (inactive)

No prob I recognised the phrase but didn't know the source


17 Jul 16 - 12:54 PM (#3800725)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

Consciousness ?





When we consciously ask what it is, there is no denying it.

Apply science to the non physical aspect of thought, science does not do well with mind, spirit, holy ghost consciousness or even accept the reality of highly specialized senses a human may express.

At age 5 I realized I was the movie.

Science is not ready to define consciousness but should be ready someday. We pretend there are no limits to our consciousness but we do not know the limits.


17 Jul 16 - 06:41 PM (#3800754)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Steve Shaw

Suppose that consciousness is real.

Suppose that human life is the pinnacle of consciousness not only on earth but in the whole universe (I doubt it, but who knows?)

As we are not just a bolt-on to the universe, but integral to it, perhaps even its greatest manifestation, does it mean that the universe, with the evolution of human beings, not only became conscious, but is increasing its consciousness? And what about intelligence?


18 Jul 16 - 04:01 AM (#3800777)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Senoufou

I watched Brian Cox's series about the Universe and how all the elements within it are inter-connected. Even the elements in our bodies were created from far-away dying stars. It was awe-inspiring (and somehow frightening, though I can't explain why exactly) Are we in fact the 'brains' of the organism called The Universe? It reminds me of that sinister black monolith in the film 'Space Odyssey 2001'.
Cox once said (if I understood him correctly) that it's now thought we are the ONLY spot in the entire Universe where there is intelligent life. There are no other intelligent life-forms out there (as I once assumed), but only on Earth. Why should that be so? And if it's true, it somehow puts a huge burden on us as guardians of The Brain.
(In my case, I keep trying to exercise it as much as possible, with diminishing returns!)


18 Jul 16 - 05:20 AM (#3800783)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Raggytash

The star men held a briefing, as the ship came into land
details of the planet, from the print-out in his hand
no record of intelligence or higher form of life
the screen shows only rubble, though bacteria are rife
the surface is unfriendly, the atmosphere is cooked
but somethings sending signals so we'd better take a look

They broke into the bunker, passed the warnings on the side
entry is restricted to the strictly certified
they found men with pens and men with pips
and women with child bearing hips
the source of all the signals was a typewriting machine
it issued bits of paper that they used instead of brains

The place had started buzzing, the atmosphere intense
the caveman said you're new here, can we sell you some defence
buy a meadow full of bombs a hillside full of germs
the star-man said but that's attack you must define your terms
the caveman said god help me some people won't be told
you've got to keep things in their place or else you lose control

Control of what the star-man, said just take a look outside
the caveman said don't give me that those tricks have all been tried
the cavemen started closing in, the star-man slammed the gate
metallic cries rang in their ears Administrate administrated
the star-man walled the bunker up, the mission was fulfilled
reporting back to base there is life here but intelligence is nil.

By Peter Bond (C)1978 ish


18 Jul 16 - 06:12 PM (#3800892)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Mrrzy

Who put the overalls in Mrs. Murphy's chowder?


18 Jul 16 - 06:21 PM (#3800894)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Senoufou

Mrs Murphy herself, because she'd left them in the pot after washing them, and then made the chowder with them still inside. Obviously a family rather short of pots.


18 Jul 16 - 07:05 PM (#3800909)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: keberoxu

Heard from the deacon at a service the final week of Advent:

"Many people have been asking us: What time is Midnight Mass.
Midnight Mass.
Is.
At.
Midnight."


and the congregation favored him with a hearty laugh.


18 Jul 16 - 10:20 PM (#3800934)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

Chowder and overalls make the perfect dishwater brown used as hair dye for Ivanka Trump. (Donald's dye- 1/4 teaspoon saffron and 3 rusty nails, boil in Civet urine and thin with water.)



Dogs have dog consciousness
Stars have star consciousness
The Dog Star is considered bright
How dim is planet X?


18 Jul 16 - 10:27 PM (#3800935)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

I didn't mean Ivanka, I meant Melanomia.


19 Jul 16 - 02:38 AM (#3800945)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Senoufou

Why did the children put beans in their ears,
When the one thing we told them NOT to do
Was to put beans in their ears?

Why did the children pour molasses on the cat,
When the one thing we told the children NOT to do
Was to pour molasses on the cat?

(Answer: because they're contrary little buggers)

keberoxu, Midnight Mass at Norwich Cathedral starts at 11-30pm, but you have to get there by 10-30pm at the very latest to secure a parking place and a seat.


19 Jul 16 - 05:24 AM (#3800974)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Rob Naylor

Joe F I have heard that a question often asked by visitors to the Grand Canyon is "What tools did they use?" I do not know how the park rangers answer this, but I think I would be speechless.

The answer I've heard most frequently is: A Scottish settler dropped a penny down a rabbit hole. However, he had a shovel.


19 Jul 16 - 09:09 AM (#3801011)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Mrrzy

Why me?


19 Jul 16 - 10:35 AM (#3801026)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

... & Who me?

Why Plagiarize ?

Have you ever played that game where every answer has to be a question itself?


20 Jul 16 - 02:57 AM (#3801175)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: BobL

No, should I have?


20 Jul 16 - 08:02 PM (#3801303)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

If you didn't, what are you going to do about it?


20 Jul 16 - 09:11 PM (#3801312)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Mrrzy

If not now, when?

I am reminded of going to a legalize pot rally and they were chanting what do we want? Legalization! And when do we want it? And I thought, whenever...


21 Jul 16 - 05:20 PM (#3801464)
Subject: RE: BS: Questions w/o Answers
From: Donuel

whenever (smile)