22 Feb 00 - 05:02 AM (#182665) Subject: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Sabra Ok so-called folk song writers, this is a challenge you have to try. Write a song called "The Panda." (This should sort out the men from the boys!) |
22 Feb 00 - 05:56 AM (#182668) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: GUEST,Patrish The Panda broke my heart
My panda's so innocent looking
I've tried all my feminine charm
Cheers
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22 Feb 00 - 08:02 AM (#182678) Subject: Lyr Add: THE PANDA (tune of The Road to Dundee) From: Calach (To the tune of "the roads and the miles to Dundee")
THE PANDA (line breaks added by a Joe clone)
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22 Feb 00 - 08:16 AM (#182679) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: kendall very clever!! |
22 Feb 00 - 09:11 AM (#182699) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Amos Calach, You da MAN!!! |
22 Feb 00 - 09:28 AM (#182711) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Troll I'm not even gonna TRY to top that one. The WINNA and Champeen! CALACH! troll |
22 Feb 00 - 11:02 AM (#182762) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: catspaw49 Wonderful build to a great punch line.....I'm cracking up here!!!!!!! Spaw |
22 Feb 00 - 11:29 AM (#182769) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: alison there's an Aussie joke along the same lines.... why is a wombat like a travelling salesman? because it eats roots and leaves.... slainte alison |
22 Feb 00 - 11:33 AM (#182772) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Molly Malone You know, I had to think a bit about the "eats roots and leaves...then I remembered my friend Maggie from Australia. She always thought the Super Rooter trucks that drove by were hysterical. Or rooter 2000. |
23 Feb 00 - 09:36 AM (#183309) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Áine Dear Patrish, If you'll add a couple more verses to your song, I'll put it in the Mudcat Songbook. I think you've got a great start there, so don't give up on it! -- Áine |
23 Feb 00 - 11:12 AM (#183377) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: GUEST,Patrish Aine, Thanks, but it was just something I did without too much thought and to be honest the one that came after is brilliant, However I do write recitations, and will post one when I have a chance - if thats ok Patrish |
23 Feb 00 - 11:22 AM (#183388) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: GUEST,_gargoyle Slow rolling blues
Ya gotta han-dah to my panda
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23 Feb 00 - 11:31 AM (#183394) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Áine Dear Patrish, That'll be fine! -- Áine |
23 Feb 00 - 11:38 AM (#183401) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Amos Whooeee! The Garg rides! Show what San Diego is good for, man. Love dem blues. A |
23 Feb 00 - 11:42 AM (#183406) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Mbo YEAH YEAH! Check out Mistah Panda In his red bandanna Gots his big belt sandah To do your floor Though he's kinda randah He's as great as Alexandah When hard work you demandah More more more! --Mbo |
23 Feb 00 - 04:52 PM (#183663) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: paddyc Wild Panda(Rover) I am a wild panda I'm a very fine bear And I like eating fruit except for the pears I will go crazy if you stop and stare But I am your normal average bear And its no nay never No nay never no more Will I be a wild panda No never no more. ....I know it's corny but I thought it was funny. |
23 Feb 00 - 06:00 PM (#183683) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: GUEST,LEJ Most people say that a Panda is cute He eats shoots and leaves, he nibbles on fruit But I'll tell you something you ain't been told yet The Panda's the smartass of the animal set! He says to the Zebra "Yo' stripes makes you look fat" Says to the mouse " Where's yo wings, little bat?" He's mean to the monkey and bad to the bird For the King of the Jungle, he ain't got a kind word And now that you know, shouldn't be no surprise Why he walks 'round the jungle with two big black eyes! |
23 Feb 00 - 06:58 PM (#183702) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Amos LEJ, done it again -- you just crack me up man! A |
23 Feb 00 - 08:12 PM (#183748) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Lonesome EJ "The Panda" Panda oh Panda you seem so very sweet Panda oh Panda come here and rub feet chorus: Oh walla walla the Panda Broke my heart Oh walla walla the Panda let a.... Oh walla walla The Panda ran away Oh walla walla maybe he'll come back one day The Panda The Panda Yeeha!!!!! chorus: By LEJ's Daughter Gizmo
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23 Feb 00 - 08:26 PM (#183758) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: dick greenhaus C'mon. The ultimate folk song challange is trying to make a living at it. |
23 Feb 00 - 09:10 PM (#183769) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: GUEST The original Panda Joke Site |
23 Feb 00 - 10:00 PM (#183806) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Troll Dick. AMEN! troll |
24 Feb 00 - 01:40 AM (#183896) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: wysiwyg There once was a Panda, Miranda, Who kept company on her verandah. Her favorite caller Was a former footballer-- I believe that his name was George Blanda. On a neighboring street the koala Had the urge to go see Walla Walla. He packed his valise, (Thought he'd stay with his niece), But she'd died and had gone to Valhallah. The koala complained to Miranda, That her life by comparison was grander. She replied with a coy, "But you're my kinda boy!" So to her veranda he wandah-ed. He proceeded to evict the footballer, And became Ms. Miranda's new follower. She offered him lunch, And he said, "Thanks a bunch, Now I think of it, I'd rather eat in Austrah-lia. The panda had planned on organza For the wedding, the groom now half landed. But she bid him adieu (And I would have, wouldn't you?) Thus he never shared panda orgasma.
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24 Feb 00 - 04:58 PM (#184241) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Amos Ahemmmm! Praise! A heemmmmm....I'm forwarding your post to your local small town newspaper... |
24 Feb 00 - 07:19 PM (#184313) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Amos I would like to throw YET ANOTHER STUPID gauntlet down in this here htread (never mind the physics!) by inviting all comers (or those who don't) to compose deathless quatrains immortalizing the following two tales of woe. Your choice: Jealous Doctor Arrested for Chastity Lock BEIJING (Reuters) - Police in southwestern China have arrested a doctor for The woman, surnamed Liu, was reported to authorities in the Sichuan Police found the 22-year-old woman had a rusty padlock pierced through two She led the police to Yao Yung, a physician at a local clinic, who was Yao was later found to have drugged and raped the young woman during a NASA Denies Astronaut Trysts in Space CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. (Reuters) - The U.S. space agency vigorously ``We are not, have not and do not plan to conduct any sex experiments,'' Author Pierre Kohler, a French astronomer who has converted himself into a Kohler cited documents posted on the Internet by a U.S. researcher, entitled The documents describe how scientists worked with astronauts to assess They found that the most conventional method falls short without gravity, he ``It appears the classical approach, the so-called missionary position, is an The experiment purportedly showed that six of the 10 trials needed props NASA said the story and the documents are false and the numbers Kohler Kohler's publisher, Calmann-Levy, told Reuters it planned to issue the book Kohler concedes that NASA and other space agencies deny such ``taboo'' |
24 Feb 00 - 07:26 PM (#184317) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Troll Police say a doctor in China, Had padlocked his lovers vagina, As he gave up the key To set the girl free, He said "I guess a cork would be kinda." there ya go Amos. Not a quatrain but it'll have to do. troll |
24 Feb 00 - 07:45 PM (#184330) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: wysiwyg Amos, With my boundless ego, doncha think I gave it to them first? I am the media slut of my county. Plus they let me get away with the almost-rhymes. The themes are nothing new in these parts, just the vocab.
Troll, But Amos. Really... |
24 Feb 00 - 07:51 PM (#184337) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Mbo Alright folks, can we get real here for a minute? Over the past few days, all I've been seeing is millions of double entendre jokes and sexual innnuedo "songs." What has happened to the tone of Mudcat? This is really starting to annoy me--can we move off the childish crude humour and get on to more interesting things? But at least you're all in Freud's highest growth order--genital fixation. Oh Sigmund, I'm not sure that's such a "high" goal to reach. --Mbo |
24 Feb 00 - 07:59 PM (#184345) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Troll Point taken, Mbo. It is getting a little deep and I am among the worst offenders.But we are just having fun and it's only on a few threads.Surely we who are entering our second childhood can be allowed to try to shock and outrage the youngsters? Don't worry. we'll get back to discussing the whichnesses of why soon enough. And we'll hold our breath 'til we turn blue and then you'll be sorry. troll "BFG" |
24 Feb 00 - 08:16 PM (#184351) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Lonesome EJ Yes, Mbo, you are right. I'm starting to think that some of us (I won't mention any names) are incapable of a sensual..er sensible copu...um Conversation about anything. But seriously Mbo, a lot of us old farts compensate for the drop in frequency of the act itself by talking about it increasingly often. Bear with us, it's probably just a phase. |
24 Feb 00 - 08:36 PM (#184355) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Amos More like a concatenation of phrase... As for the tone of the Cat I would point out to you sir that our finest and highest minded poets have all had a streak of Avon's bawd in them. Lust is no offense unless you ar eoverly concerned that someone. somewhere might be happy! While I would never hold that all happiness comes from lust, I seriously submit that harmless lustiness of mind is no harm, no foul, no offense, and can be a great source of jollies. I think that the notion that all body parts and all their functions must be cloaked is a leedle bit outre, obsolete, disproven as a source of virtue and useless as a meeans of persuasion. Amos |
24 Feb 00 - 08:45 PM (#184358) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Amos Troll: I LOVE yer Limerick!! Damn, you're good! A |
24 Feb 00 - 08:47 PM (#184361) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: wysiwyg Alright, it falls to me again--- Mbo: NO! |
24 Feb 00 - 08:54 PM (#184365) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Mbo Well, since I'm not into the sporcaccone music, I guess I'm not one of the "finest & highest minded poets" then. It seems unfair that I'm sitting around for 2 months trying to conceptualize a song, while you folks are pumping out stuff like this is 5 seconds flat. You're just like those shock "artists" in New York, making your weird little "art" forms, all the while calling those (like me) who would like to see something a little less base, prudes and art police and creativity smotherers, and who knows what else. Would you like to hurl some elephant dung at me too? For dung and other scatalogical garbage is all anyone seems to be an expert at anymore around here. And look at me! This place has slowly turned me into a restless, angry, self-loathing mess. Sure, go ahead and have your little fun. Make yourselves happy with your little raunch-o-rama. See if I care. --Mbo |
24 Feb 00 - 08:58 PM (#184367) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Mbo Thanks a lot, Praise. Yeah, me leaving here would hurt you like it would to see flamewarring anonymous GUESTS leave. |
24 Feb 00 - 09:24 PM (#184376) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Amos Oh....MBO!!! Please, please for the love of Gawd. lighten thyself!!! We all LOVE your obstinate lil butt, OK? And we aren't being that raunchy, and as for elephant dung...that stuff can be dangerous. But if you whine I might just unwind. 'Course its just me. I am coarse in my heart -- I admit it. I do not have your delicacy or your mastery of finesse and small kindnesses. You are a sweeter soul than I. No question... Now as to your remark that the Mudcat has tuned you in to a self-loathing mess, I am deeply sorry -- hold still, buddy, this will only hurt a little -- remember I love you, okay -- here we go: BUUULLLSHIIIIIITTTT you self-centered peckerhead! If you are into self-loathing after all the beauty you have ALREADY added to the world at the tender age of 20, then it is entirely, without exception, your own personal individual absoilute and unmitigated power of self determination at work, and cannot be blamed on your fellow humans in any way, period, because you are responsible for your condition in every iota thereof AND THAT'S FINAL!! Ok, now remember, we all love ya and that didn't hurt, and even if it did its a healing process. I know you're absolutely too goddamn smart and beautiful not to have understood, so no pretense, either! Love, Amos |
24 Feb 00 - 09:28 PM (#184379) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Amos After I unleashed my rant at you, Sir Beau, I realized I was yelling at myself, just as much as you. 'Twas ever thus... |
24 Feb 00 - 09:31 PM (#184381) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Barky Mbo,
You are a wonderful guy! I may be new to this list, but I know that already. I love ya, man!
~Barky
PS: (Uh-oh, she's having a South Park movie moment)
Satan: Sadam, is sex all you ever think about? |
24 Feb 00 - 09:36 PM (#184382) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: wysiwyg Mbo! Get a grip!!! Yer having a bad day???? We're just out of phhaaahhahhhaahaassee... It is not always easy to become a Real Rabbit. When the rest of that fur's been rubbed off you will shine!!! Please see me in the Personals to continue this if you wish to explore further.... Also look there for some other interesting stuff from me. To zee pages! |
24 Feb 00 - 09:49 PM (#184389) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Mbo Thanks folks....I'm just having a bad day...artists are very tempermental people. I think what I need is some religion RIGHT NOW! I know must of you disapprove of this sort of stuff, but I don't care that I'm the last Catholic on earth (or at least on Mudcat) who actually cares about his religion, doesn't make fun of it or slam it--but what I need is just some ABSOLUTION. Free myself of the sins I have wrought here, before they destroy me completely! Well, now that that's over, I'd just like to say--go on and have your silly fun, but also open up some more oppurtunies where I might be able to have some fun too without compromising my principles. And thanks very much, Barky, it really means a lot to me. Ahh...if you were only older...HA HA! :{> BTW you don't mean to tell me you actually WATCH that South Park rubbish do you? --Matthew (Mbo) |
24 Feb 00 - 09:52 PM (#184391) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: wysiwyg Yay Mbo!!!!! |
25 Feb 00 - 03:05 PM (#184883) Subject: RE: Ultimate Folk Song Challenge From: Amos In nomine deo te absoluo, filius meus -- go and sin no more... |