20 Jun 00 - 07:04 PM (#245117) Subject: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Here's the 'beastie bliss' as promised. This challenge idea was suggested by our own dear Bert. Go for it, Challenge!rs!!! -- Áine ************************************** Vienna, May 9 - The illegal stowaway arrived in the Czech Republic with a nasty hangover and was apprehended by the authorities - but not without a fight. But instead of being sent back on the first ship out, he's become a star. Meet Vaclav, the raccoon who survived for weeks on beer and dog food. "He was one lucky raccoon," says Vladimir Thichor, head of the animal clinic in Pardubice. "If that consignment of beer had not been on board, he would not have lasted three days." Vaclav - named by Czechs with a wink at their ex-dissident President Vaclav Havel, another great survivor - traveled in a container all the way from Canada to the East Bohemian town of Pardubice, deep in the provinces. He probably crept in for a free meal when the container was being loaded in Toronto. But when the door closed, he was trapped for more than three weeks. Vaclav tore into the packs of dry dog-food, then looked for something to quench his thirst. Something told him to sink his sharp teeth into a six pack, and from that moment on, Vaclav was one happy puppy. So to speak. As a result, when the container was opened, Vaclav did not want to come out: he had found beastie bliss. Two policemen specially trained in the capture of vicious animals were called in. Clad in protective suits and armed with gladiator nets, the team spent two hours trapping the rancorous raccoon, who fought them tooth and claw all the way to his allotted cage. There, he sulked in a corner and slept it off, suffering the raccoon equivalent of cold turkey. Nor was he charmed when he was given a bath to wash the beer residue out of his matted coat. Vaclav is now the darling of the Czech media. The Pardubice animal clinic's phone has been jammed with calls offering him a home. Director Thichor, however, was not moved by the outpouring of sentiment. "A raccoon is not a family pet," he said. "Vaclav will go to a zoo where everyone can come and see him - and where we will try to find him a mate." Now if he could just get a television and a six pack ... |
20 Jun 00 - 07:24 PM (#245124) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Bradypus Just an attempt to get in first this time ...
Beastie Bliss
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20 Jun 00 - 10:13 PM (#245191) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Ooohhh, aren't you the clever pup, dear Bradypus? A fantastic entry to get things off on the right paw! I love it! -- Áine |
20 Jun 00 - 11:58 PM (#245241) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Dave (the ancient mariner) To the tune Blow Boys Blow (Congo River)
Well Vaclav going down the Saint Lawrence river
Container ships are mighty cold
What do you think he had for dinners
Stuck in the hold the poor little nipper
Got arrested by police rat catchers
Got many tales to tell his children
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20 Jun 00 - 11:59 PM (#245242) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Dave (the ancient mariner) Sorry bout the editing lost a line there mates |
21 Jun 00 - 10:27 AM (#245395) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine What a great song to wake up and find in the Challenge!, Dave(tam)!! I especially like the dry beef hearts and horses livers line. I do hope that you'll be giving us the missing line soon. Well done (as usual)! -- Áine |
21 Jun 00 - 10:39 AM (#245403) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg Shall we use the Euro pronunciation, Vahss-wahhff? Or the Canadian (shudder)? And would his native language be French???? The mind reels at the possibilities. ~S~ |
21 Jun 00 - 10:48 AM (#245411) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Hello there dear Praise!! You can call him whatever you like, just don't call him late for dinner and drinks . . . hehehe . . . couldn't help myself . . . -- Áine |
21 Jun 00 - 10:48 AM (#245412) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Mbo Mine is coming along, but still not complete yet... --Mbo |
21 Jun 00 - 11:10 AM (#245422) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Dave (the ancient mariner) Insert= That Molsons brew will make him bold Sorry for the delay Admiral Aine Ma'am.. Yours, Aye. Dave |
21 Jun 00 - 11:39 AM (#245434) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: MMario Where is me tree? Me noggin, noggin tree? It's all gone ta beer and dry dog food! Well, I stepped into a crate Now my head it surely aches And across the eastern ocean I have traveled!
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21 Jun 00 - 11:44 AM (#245438) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Now that's a 'wandering rover' song, if there ever was one, dear MMario! Wunnerful, wunnerful, wunnerful ... there's a tune running in my own head to this, but tell me did you have one in mind for it? And I'd love to hear you sing this... -- Áine (P.S. You'll be glad to know that I've got the "Additions to the Mudcat Songbook" threads straightened out at last, hehehe) |
21 Jun 00 - 11:48 AM (#245442) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg Aine, OK, but everyone knew him as Nancy. Apparently the stupid jokes function returns before the songwriting function comes back online. ~S~ |
21 Jun 00 - 12:00 PM (#245450) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: MMario "All for me Grog" is the tune, also known as "Beer and Tobacco" and probably half a dozen other names. title is:
pleasedon'thitme |
21 Jun 00 - 12:06 PM (#245456) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Dear Praise, Well, you've got the title (But Everyone Knew Him As Nancy), so go forth and write the song!! Dear MMario, Don't recognize the titles you gave, but since I was able to sing through your song the first go 'round, I must know it. I really, really like it -- so, we'll be hearing this one on the Mudcat Radio real soon, right?? -- Áine |
21 Jun 00 - 12:10 PM (#245460) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg Naw, just a glimmer, of Rocky Raccoon, parodized as Vaclaw Raccoon, and no brain cells coming to rescue it (the idea; me). Anyone is welcome to hop on the idea and write it. What is needed is a collaborateur! Why do we not team up on these more often? Think of it-- a team of Catters could get togther and write together under a whole new pseudonym! ~S~ |
21 Jun 00 - 12:35 PM (#245464) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg OK, OK, OK. Do the Beatles count as trad???
Vaclaw Raccoon (with apologies to Lennon/McCartney) And may God have mercy on us all. ~S~ |
21 Jun 00 - 12:39 PM (#245465) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Now THAT'S a parody!! Whooo-whooo -- It's the Praise Train coming through -- Wunnerful, wunnerful, AND wunnerful again -- I knew you could do it, girlfriend!! Yes ma'am -- now, admit it, don't you feel better?? *BG* -- Áine |
21 Jun 00 - 12:46 PM (#245468) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg No! I feel quite brain dead and slimy! But LOL! Gotta start somewhar! ~s~ |
21 Jun 00 - 12:47 PM (#245469) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg See what I mean? Extremely low brain function-- that SHOULD read, "SumDamn'Wharr"!!! ~S~ |
21 Jun 00 - 01:57 PM (#245492) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: MMario but praise -- one SHOULD feel brain-dead and slimy after finishing a successful parody! Which means you done good! |
21 Jun 00 - 02:51 PM (#245505) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Well, we can't have Praise being the only one of us feelin' brain dead and slimy, now can we??? [Note of Explanation: "Nutros" are my doggie's favorite snack biscuit. And for you Gilligan aficionados, the verse that begins with "A brave racoon..." corresponds with the original verse in which the characters are named, explaining the obvious variance in scansion.]
Beastie Bliss (or The Tale of Jean Four Feet) |
21 Jun 00 - 02:57 PM (#245509) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: MMario Now why can't I come up with something like that *grumble* |
21 Jun 00 - 04:28 PM (#245548) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg Here, Mmario, have some slime. It's on me. ~S~ |
21 Jun 00 - 04:59 PM (#245565) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg Well, Aine, the thing is, whatever is sung to the tune from Gilligan's should also work to the tune for Amazing Grace, and also House of the Rising Sun. So you score a triple there-- plus, it's GOOD. Oh, and O Little Town of Bethlehem, so quadruple song score!!! Crap! Guess that means you win! ~S~ |
21 Jun 00 - 05:14 PM (#245569) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Merci beaucoup, cher! Now, Praise -- Everyone's A Winner In The Song Challenge! *BG* And MMario -- you just quit yer grumblin' there boy-o -- you are one of the Great Ones of the SONG CHALLENGE! threads...yea verily, though I walk through the dreck of my own parodies, I shall lift mine eyes to the hills of MMario for inspiration and a good giggle...So there! -- Áine |
21 Jun 00 - 07:44 PM (#245638) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Bradypus Dave, MMario - a couple of good, rousing singalong songs there. MMario - no need to duck when you've got a good pun - stand up and be proud of it! (besides, you saved me from doing it! Praise - don't worry about the Beetles - they're just as traditional as some of the other tunes we've used in past challenges. If it works (and it does!) squeeze it in - no-one has complained yet. Aine - back on song, I see. Here's my second attempt :
The Wild Racoon |
21 Jun 00 - 08:32 PM (#245656) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Great stuff, Bradypus!! We've got a string of winners going here -- let's go Challenge!rs!! -- Áine |
22 Jun 00 - 12:10 AM (#245727) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Kelida Wow! Nothing like a Wild Rover Parody to brighten my early morning. Great stuff Bradypus. Praise--As much as I feel that Beatles parodies are something like sacrilege, that was a good one. Definitely lovin' it. And they COULD be like folk--in a way. . .sort of. . . I'm always in such complete awe of all the wonderful songwriters here. I feel so inadequate--but I'm going to write a song anyway! (later on of course--not at midnight--i's just to late) Peace--Keli |
22 Jun 00 - 09:17 AM (#245821) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: MMario Bradypus, I bow thrice in your direction. Brilliant! |
22 Jun 00 - 09:23 AM (#245822) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Dear Kelida, Can't wait to see what you come up with! Hope you got some sleep last night . . . I was up late enjoying the Mudcat Radio marathon -- what a show! Is this place great, or what? -- Áine (yawning this morning, but with a great big smile on her face) |
22 Jun 00 - 01:06 PM (#245911) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg NOW I feel better! So many good songs! ~S~ |
22 Jun 00 - 03:23 PM (#246014) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Mbo Here y'are... Oh What a Shame! Well I thought I smelled food, so I ran past the dude Who was loading stuff in the hold And a big metal box sitting there on the docks Was the source, so my raccoon nose told But when I got inside, the giant door on the side Was closed and locked on me And I thought "Just my luck, for I'm a raccoon Canuck ith no way to get myself free!" Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! Wish I was in my tree again! So I started to shake and a fit did I take And I thought what can I do now? But I'm a nocturnal guy, and soon my eyes they did spy Stacks of Purina puppy chow So with claws sharp as knives, I tore in, and surprise I found some tasty fare So as I crunched on the snack, like an addict on crack I wished somehow I could wash it all down Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! Wish I had a gurgling creek again! "It's all over and done" I thought my race has been run Cause my throat was as parched as sand And to have myself die from a throat that was dry Was the worst injustice in the land But then God answered my plea, cause I felt something hit me Yeah, it knocked me right on the head And I smiled with love, for what had fell from abovel It was a can of Killian's Red! Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! But that beer took away the pain! So with the pallets of beer, I then made richt guid cheer I was living just like a king And to hang out in my pad, just like a furry Jack-the-Lad Well, it seemed like the greatest thing Yeah it was mighty high style, and better all the while Than even wild and woolly racoon sex But I heard voices outside and the big door opened wide Now I'm in the homeland of the Czechs!! Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! They looked at me like I was insane! Well I fought tooth and nail, but eventually failed When they tried to haul me out There was nought I could do, I ended up in this zoo With no beer & Chow, which makes me pout And now they call me "Vaclav" just like I'm some sort of Slav Instead of "Bob" where I used to roam And the phones ring all day, from carzy people who say: "Oh, we want to take you home!" Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! I wish I was in my crate again!!!! Doo waa doo, wa wa wa wa Doo doo waaaaaaaa Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! Oh what a shame! I wish I was in my crate again!!! --Mbo |
22 Jun 00 - 03:29 PM (#246017) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: MMario *applause* |
22 Jun 00 - 03:39 PM (#246028) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Bravo, Mbo!! Your little ditty filled me with "richt guid cheer", I must say. *BG* Another great one for the Winners page!! -- Áine |
22 Jun 00 - 03:53 PM (#246038) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Mbo Thanks, but I made some spelling & html fudges in there...blame it on my excitement to put it up! It's parody of Roy Wood's "Oh What a Shame!" BTW, which is slightly worse than parodying a Beatles song, but still belong parodying ELO... --Mbo |
22 Jun 00 - 06:46 PM (#246107) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Bradypus Nice one, Mbo. Rhyming 'sex' and 'czechs' really appeals, and leaves me wishing I'd thought of that one. Praise - I forgot to mention - I actually did a Beatles parody in Challenge 18, and got away with it! Bradypus |
22 Jun 00 - 07:49 PM (#246132) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Amergin Well here I go. Not nearly as good as the others. But oh well.
Many Raccoons of Twenty
Chorus:
I went walking across the land me boys
Chorus:
I was walking in the cargo hold
Chorus:
I ate dogfood and drank some beer
Chorus:
Now I live locked behind a cage
Many raccoons of twenty said goodbye...... Amergin
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22 Jun 00 - 08:29 PM (#246152) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Dear Amergin, I quote you, "Not nearly as good as the others" -- Well, all I've got to say to that is PUSHAH!! Lovely, lovely, job, dear Amergin. Count yourself among the Greats, please. -- Áine |
22 Jun 00 - 10:05 PM (#246222) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Amergin *Blush* thanks, Aine... |
23 Jun 00 - 01:43 PM (#246620) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Amergin refresh |
23 Jun 00 - 01:54 PM (#246627) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: SINSULL Amergin - brought back sad memories of gnomes in a similar situation! Very good. Mbo - raccoon Canuck??!!! Doo wah doo wah. Loved it. Needed a laugh today. Thanks. |
26 Jun 00 - 10:45 AM (#247006) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Well, since you all have had a few days to work on your Challenge! songs during the Great Summer Crash -- how's about we see a couple more here before we move on to the next Challenge!?? -- Áine |
26 Jun 00 - 11:23 AM (#247023) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: MMario Oh give me a home Where the Raccoons don't roam To Europe when they wish to play Where seldom is heard A phrase that's absurd And we all get the MudCat Cafe! Home, Home isn't strange So why won't the Raccoons stay? Do they dislike our Ale? or is their life just that stale That they have to r...un away?
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26 Jun 00 - 11:49 AM (#247034) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg Snork! |
26 Jun 00 - 06:09 PM (#247318) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Dharmabum Been pretty busy lately, but here's my late entry. HUNGOVER ROVER {sung to, I'm lookin over a 4 leaf clover} I'm a raccoon rover, With a bad hangover, From too much kibbles & beer, I just stopped in, Last nite for a snack, Now it looks like, I'll never get back, I'm a raccoon rover, With a bad hangover, From too much kibbles & beer, I woke up this mornin, My fur was all wet, Now they're comin at me, With a great big net, I'm a rancorous rover, Who's rovin days are over, Because of too much, Kibbles & beer. Ron. |
26 Jun 00 - 06:15 PM (#247324) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: wysiwyg !!!!!!! |
26 Jun 00 - 06:36 PM (#247340) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Bradypus Good one, Ron. Bradypus |
26 Jun 00 - 10:23 PM (#247453) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Áine Alrighty then! Congrats, cudos and a great big thanks to everyone for their 'beastie bliss' entries. Another wunnerful, wunnerful, job by my darlin' Challenge!rs. Here are the 'results' of the Challenge! -- and stay tuned folks, for in the morning I've got a real "wake up" call for ya! (hehehehe):
Winners of the Golden Cow Chip Award with Shamrock: |
30 Aug 01 - 02:28 PM (#538283) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Jack the Sailor THe Beer went well (THE LAST FAREWELL) - Words: R. A. Prankster, Music: Roger Whittaker, 1971 There's a ship thats being loaded in the harbour To the Czech Republic she will steer A container on this cargo ship is filled with Some doggie chow and Molson Export beer A racoon will stow aboard that ship tomorrow With a tummy full of beer as they set sail
For beer is wonderful, and racoons seem to like it
Though zoo officials gather all around him
For he's in Europe now, And racoons are so rare there |
30 Aug 01 - 03:27 PM (#538328) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: MMario oh - I really think we DO need to do a "Song Challenge!" Singaround at FSGW getaway weekend....but if they put it on the schedule I'll have to work on my phrasing...I can just hear and the taste of beer I know so very well floating out across the dusky evening... |
03 Sep 01 - 06:32 AM (#540652) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 29 From: Aidan Crossey To the tune of "The Jug Of Punch" One pleasant evening in the month of May I was on my rambles, down Toronto way To scavenge scraps of the humans' waste An enticing smell made me up my pace Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo To scavenge scraps of the humans' waste An enticing smell made me up my pace No airline food on this cargo crate But dry dog food, being flown as freight So I checked in for my long-haul flight Eating doggie biscuits at cruising height Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo So I checked in for my long-haul flight Eating doggie biscuits at cruising height But on arrival, my trip went sour I sat on board several weary hours Until it dawned, and my blood ran cold, I was a prisoner inside the hold Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo Until it dawned, and my blood ran cold, I was a prisoner inside the hold To ease my panic, I then took stock I was caught between a hard place and a rock I had food enough to cause no sweat But I sorely lacked the stuff that's wet Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo I had food enough to cause no sweat But I sorely lacked the stuff that's wet And then kind Providence took a hand As I chewed distractedly on a can My teeth did rupture, out flowed a pool Of a liquid brew that was golden cool Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo My teeth did rupture, out flowed a pool Of a liquid brew that was golden cool It eased my thirst and it eased my mind I sang and danced, left my cares behind I guzzled on until I was drunk As my fellow mammal, the smelly skunk Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo I guzzled on until I was drunk As my fellow mammal, the smelly skunk And as I languish in Praha zoo I pray each night for my rescue Someone to take me away from here To feed me biscuits and serve me beer Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo Tooralooraloo, tooralooraloo Someone to take me away from here To feed me biscuits and serve me beer |