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75 messages

BS: Kendalls apology

04 Nov 00 - 03:05 PM (#334559)
Subject: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

Ok, I really dropped a clod in the churn this time. It was an ill considered flippant remark. I had no idea that anyone would be offended, it was not a personal attack. It was simply a piece of black humor. If I had known that even a handful of people would be offended, I would have either posted it as a Guest (coward) or not at all.
So, I hereby offer my most sincere apologies to anyone who found that remark offensive. UNCLE!! now, let me up.


04 Nov 00 - 03:06 PM (#334562)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: mousethief

Take back what you implied about me being a woman.


04 Nov 00 - 03:11 PM (#334567)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Troll

First Kendall agrees with me and then he apologizes.
TAKE ME HOME LORD! I'M READY TO GO!

troll LOL


04 Nov 00 - 03:13 PM (#334569)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

Mousethief, I never implied any such thing. How long have you had this paranoia?


04 Nov 00 - 03:13 PM (#334570)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: GUEST,Ceitagh

Forgiven....though I find it hard to understand how that comment could have been taken as anything *but* a gross generalisation and insult. Mayhaps your black humor is simply too dark for daylight.

Pax,
Kate


04 Nov 00 - 03:15 PM (#334576)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

And I dont see why anyone would take it personally.


04 Nov 00 - 03:15 PM (#334577)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: DougR

I guess I missed the afore-said remark, Kendall, so I don't know whether to be offended or not! LOL Doug


04 Nov 00 - 03:17 PM (#334582)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)

To mousethief, regarding Kendall's implying that you are a woman: in the words of Frodo Baggins, "It was a compliment and therefore not true!"


04 Nov 00 - 03:18 PM (#334583)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)

Mousethief, I hope you know I'm kidding!


04 Nov 00 - 03:21 PM (#334587)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

I was talking to a guy from Eastport Maine at a bluegrass festival, and when he found out that I was from Machias, he said "Machias? I went to Machias looking for a girl, but left without one, They were all so ugly, the friggin' tide wouldn't take them out"! I was not offended, in fact, I laughed at the cleverness of the remark. I knew he was just being funny, and, it was not a personal attack.


04 Nov 00 - 03:31 PM (#334593)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Mary in Kentucky

If I might bring up an idea here...I've always felt that if the humor outweighs the smuttiness, or unPCness or whatever, go for it. I love to laugh at myself. (I'm female and kinda enjoy clever female jokes.) But I know many people are very offended by off-color, sexist, racist, etc. jokes, so generally I don't tell them to anyone except close buddies. Any thoughts folks?

Kendall, I wasn't in the least offended by your comment, but, I know that many people are. Someone once said that the apparently benign humor was the most damaging of all. Just wondering...


04 Nov 00 - 03:33 PM (#334596)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: SINSULL

I wasn't offended Kendall. Just smiled, shook my head, and said "That loveable old curmudgeon - he really stepped in this time." So now apologize to all of those people who are too ugly to get laid and let it go.
Mary


04 Nov 00 - 03:44 PM (#334601)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Troll

Hey, guys, the man apologized. There isn't much more that he can do.
He didn't mean to offend anyone, he's just this old, insensitive, liberal, ex-cop from Maine, who probably got kicked in the head by a moose one too many times and can't really be held responsible for what he says.
In fact, He probably stole the line from somebody else. He's not known for original thinking anyhow.
So lets everybody back off and show some respect for his advanced age and for the few grey hairs he has left. Just look on him as a crusty old uncle who sometimes says inappropriate things and to whom no one pays much attention.

troll***uncontrolled mirth***


04 Nov 00 - 03:51 PM (#334607)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Mrrzy

Oh yes he can be held responsible, but it just wasn't that offensive - and this from someone who can't get laid to save her hide, I sometimes think!


04 Nov 00 - 03:54 PM (#334610)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: McGrath of Harlow

"I'm truly sorry. And I didn't do nothing wrong anyway." I paraphrase here, but not innaccurately.

That's the kind of apology I'd expect from a politician who's been caught out telling porkies about his past(naming no names). This election you're having is affecting everybody, it seems...


04 Nov 00 - 04:10 PM (#334620)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Bagpuss

I didn't see the comment, but I'm offended anyway!!

Bagpuss


04 Nov 00 - 04:23 PM (#334629)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Midchuck

People who are too easily offended offend me.

Kendall, I think the situation called for a suggestion that the offended individual commit any one of a number of anatomically immpossible acts, rather than an apology.

If the level of "blackness," political correctness, and general raunchiness of the humor in the mudcat is to be set by the most easily offended person in the whole bunch, the hell with it.

Peter.


04 Nov 00 - 04:34 PM (#334637)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Jeri

I think some people get offended as a hobby. It's annoying to the rest of us, but their lives must be sheer hell being pissed off all the time. Some people think the glass is half empty, some think it's half full, and others just *know* someone has spit in it...

Previous opinion expressed in a lame song, which should have a verse about "I didn't think that was funny!"


04 Nov 00 - 04:41 PM (#334641)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Bagpuss

Q. How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?

A. What ever the answer is, IT'S NOT FUNNY!

Bagpuss


04 Nov 00 - 04:43 PM (#334642)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Troll

PROTECT THE EASILY OFFENDED.
BAN EVERYTHING!

troll


04 Nov 00 - 04:55 PM (#334645)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Greyeyes

I have a reputation amongst close friends for being "the rudest man in the world". Amongst people I don't know well I appear a model of politeness and decorum.

My humour depends to a large extent on rudeness, but I never intentionally offend anyone. I am only rude to people I know well, who will not take offence.

On the rare occasions I have really offended someone it is usually when drunk, and it happens because in my cups I think someone is a bosom friend,(as you do when drunk) when really I met them 5 minutes ago.

On the Mudcat (in the Mudcat, whatever), you can assume (as Kendall seems to have done) That everyone knows and loves you, when really some people don't know you from Adam. George Bernard Shaw once claimed "There can be no guilt, without intent." While this is contrary to the legal rule that "ignorance is no defence", I think unless you meant to offend, no offence should be taken.


04 Nov 00 - 04:57 PM (#334647)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Greyeyes

My God that sounds pompous.


04 Nov 00 - 05:18 PM (#334658)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Jeri

I don't think it sounds pomous! I can out-pompous that easily, and I'm sure I've done so on many occasions. Look! I'm doing it now!

I think Kendall's only mistake was in not predicting people would see him as an opinionated, humorless old fart. He has quite a keen sense of humor.


04 Nov 00 - 05:26 PM (#334663)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Tinker

Kendall, I haven't been here that long, but you do such a fine job insulting your fellow males, that I might have felt we women were not on your radar. My New Englander dad used to say never insult someone you don't like. It'll go too far. So since I agree with you, I can feel complimented and know you still like all those other women too. BG

Tinker


04 Nov 00 - 05:28 PM (#334664)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Jon Freeman

Jeri, so you're saying Kendall is a humourous old fart? ;-)

Jon


04 Nov 00 - 05:37 PM (#334671)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Jeri

No Jon. I DID say he had a sense of humor! And you left out "opinionated." ;-)


04 Nov 00 - 05:39 PM (#334672)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Ebbie

I can't believe it- I've now erased four of my responses. I guess I'll just keep my mouth shut.

Ebbie


04 Nov 00 - 05:44 PM (#334677)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: WyoWoman

Well, I haven't a clue what the original insult was (was it that about the "tide won't carry 'em out" that you said above? If so, someone needs more fiber in her diet.

BUT ...if all this thread did was to introduce Jeri's splendid song to me, it was well worth it. I am putting it on my songlist for my next Mudcat Concert, abso-freakin-lootley.

Jeri rools.

ww


04 Nov 00 - 05:48 PM (#334681)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Greyeyes

Tinker, you've proved my point about pomposity, or perhaps verbosity would be putting it better. Your New Englander Dad's comment said what it took me 4 paragraphs to say in 6 word. "Never insult anyone you don't like."


04 Nov 00 - 05:56 PM (#334687)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Art Thieme

Well, this seems to be as good a place as any for me (Art Thieme) to do it too.-------

--------I'm SORRY also. So there.

Now I feel like a Catholic who just came out of the confession booth------or a Jew the day after Yom Kippur or whatever.

It seemed like it was good for you, Kendall-----and it was sure good for me. (Let's share a cigarette.)

What thread was the offending one that precipitated all this???

Art


04 Nov 00 - 06:01 PM (#334691)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Greyeyes

I'm getting confused now. Can we just post a blanket apology here and have all our past sins absolved? I knew what Kendall was apologising for but Art Thieme has lost me. Was that the intention? If so, I have to tell you, it isn't difficult (losing me, that is).


04 Nov 00 - 06:08 PM (#334698)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Murray MacLeod

Where are these women who are too ugly to get laid, anyway? I have never seen one.

Murray


04 Nov 00 - 06:11 PM (#334700)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: catspaw49

Aw screw that Pansy.....KENDALL ROOLS!!!!

Consider the fact that he's a miserable old fart without any redeeming social value and you'll see that an apology is never needed from him. Kendall was young once, but the earth has cooled considerably since then and sadly, so has Kendall's gray matter. Maine born and bread, he was never long on smarts to begin with and living on a diet of pemmican and moose turd pie has reduced his already addled mind to one which resembles a Brussel sprout in both size and function. At age 12, its reported that he was on the verge of having an original thought, but was cut short when he was kicked in the head by a flatulent moose that he was trying to circumsize.

He now makes statements which he believes have meaning or are humorous although they are generally neither. Its difficult for Kendall to understand what is or is not funny or meaningful since he has also gone through life with a lobster clamped on his balls and an oyster up his ass. So I implore you........give him a break.

Spaw


04 Nov 00 - 06:14 PM (#334702)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

Troll, I'm not an ex cop


04 Nov 00 - 06:21 PM (#334706)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Tinker

Jeri---LOVE the song... My kids are running from the room. How dare I sing the chorus.... I'm a grown-up! (Well, at least sometimes)

Tinker


04 Nov 00 - 06:23 PM (#334707)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

Murray, there is no such thing as a woman, or man, who is too ugly to get laid.
Spaw.. you made my day! Here is a good example of what humor can do. I could get pissed at spaw for his attacks, but, I think he is kidding. Furthermore, I am secure enough in knowing who and what I am that it would take much more than the raving of an unbalanced midwestern wild man with a possum fetish to upset me.
Thanks to those who understand, and, according to the PMs I have received, you are running about 20 to one pro kendall.


04 Nov 00 - 06:28 PM (#334711)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Greyeyes

Clearly Spaw likes you Kendall, and thus proves my point.


04 Nov 00 - 06:30 PM (#334714)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Troll

OK, so yer not an ex-cop.
I ain't apologizin'. Theres been too damn much apologizin' already around this dang place. 'Sa matter with you people. Cain'tcha take a JOKE?

troll...hadda keep it short. on my way to a gig.fer PAY!


04 Nov 00 - 06:31 PM (#334715)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Murray MacLeod

Kendall, "there is no such thing as a man who is too ugly to get laid??????????" . Jeez, you don't gave to carry your apology THAT far!!

Murray


04 Nov 00 - 06:46 PM (#334728)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

sorry, I dont have any ashes or sack cloth


04 Nov 00 - 06:48 PM (#334729)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: catspaw49

Oh I dunno' Murray.....When was the last time you got laid?

Spaw


04 Nov 00 - 07:07 PM (#334741)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Murray MacLeod

A gentleman never tells, Spaw ....but I do feel lucky tonight

Murray


04 Nov 00 - 07:14 PM (#334743)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: catspaw49

You're right Murray...A gentleman never tells.......so then you'll be reporting back into us here huh?

Spaw


04 Nov 00 - 07:15 PM (#334744)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Greyeyes

Murray, keep us informed. It's 12.15 in the Uk but I'm prepared to wait up!


04 Nov 00 - 07:16 PM (#334745)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Clinton Hammond2

kendall

I thought ya had bigger stones than that....

They don't like something you said? That's THEIR problem, not yours!

Where'd that box of Mudcat Bran Muffins get to? This place is really starting to need it bad!!

:-|


04 Nov 00 - 07:28 PM (#334748)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: GUEST,harp

Ole Kendall is like a dog turd anyway. The older he gets, the easier it is to pick him up!!!!


04 Nov 00 - 07:34 PM (#334750)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: McGrath of Harlow

I agree. Save the insults for your friends. If you have an enemy you would like to destroy, flattery is a better weapon. Tell them they can walk on water, and with any luck they might drown.


04 Nov 00 - 07:49 PM (#334757)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: catspaw49

Ah McGrath, that was beautiful. You can walk on water.

Spaw


04 Nov 00 - 07:55 PM (#334759)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

You should know Harpgirl! If I said that about a woman, some of you would be all over me like a cheap suit!


04 Nov 00 - 07:58 PM (#334761)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: catspaw49

Well Kendall, at least it would feel familiar......the cheap suit that is.

Spaw


04 Nov 00 - 08:03 PM (#334766)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

thats true spaw, its all a retired govt. employeee can afford.


04 Nov 00 - 08:14 PM (#334776)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: CarolC

I wasn't offended.

I agree that there isn't a woman on the face of the planet who can't get laid. For every woman in the world, there are at least 100 men who would gladly give her a good poke. (Probably a lot more than 100.)

Here's my one "however". I have found that a lot of men who like the kind of humor that got this whole thread started in the first place, are frequently offended when they hear jokes like:

"Why did God create Man?...."

"Because dildos can't mow the lawn."

Personally, I choose to not tell jokes that could be taken as "gender bashing". I think they cause more bad feelings than good feelings. And to me, humor is about good feelings. But that's just my own personal preference. If kendall wants to live with the repercussions that frequently accompany that particular kind of humor, he's a big boy, he can make up his own mind.

Carol


04 Nov 00 - 08:39 PM (#334793)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

I think thats funny! does that mean I'm not normal? I dont get offended unless it is personal. Even then, I might decide not to give the offender that much power.


04 Nov 00 - 08:53 PM (#334802)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: catspaw49

Actually Carol, you can get the new riding dildo with the 36" cut........New and Improved....Much better model. You'll find yourself volunteering to cut the local football field twice a week.

Spaw


04 Nov 00 - 08:54 PM (#334803)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: CarolC

(kendall, re: your question about being "normal". Are you sure you want to ask a question like that around here?)


04 Nov 00 - 08:56 PM (#334804)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: CarolC

Spaw...gasoline powered or electric?


04 Nov 00 - 08:56 PM (#334805)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: SINSULL

So - it's all settled. Kendall now says that no woman is too ugly to get laid. That should satisfy everyone. TEE HEE. Maybe I'll start a thread to force him to prove it. Can see the headlines now "Famous Folksinger Sea Captain Falls In Action". All the makings of a song challenge.


04 Nov 00 - 09:02 PM (#334810)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Mooh

Kendall, I laughed my butt off when I first read your original remark. It was a while before I even read it because I most often don't bother with the type of thread that I see as too much controversy for my patience. But I'm glad it wasn't me who said it, even if my sense of humour found it acceptable. I understand how it upset people, though I don't understand why it would be taken personally. Based on your history here, even I knew it was a wry, dark, ironic remark.

As someone once said of me, "You've got a size 20 mouth. Room for both nines and a bit to grow into.". LOL!

Peace. Mooh.


04 Nov 00 - 09:17 PM (#334819)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: catspaw49

Carol, you'll be happy to know its ecologically safe, being solar powered....which should really heat things up. The solar generator drives a bellows affair off an accordion (right down your alley, so to speak) which not only drives the blades, but provides a pulsating action to the semi-pneumatic 22" whang. Any excess air pressure is bled off through a pop-off valve in the rear which blows a stream of cool air across your ass.

Spaw


04 Nov 00 - 09:25 PM (#334823)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: CarolC

Dear Santa,

For Christmas this year, I want....


04 Nov 00 - 09:30 PM (#334826)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Matt_R

Yet everyone wanted ME to apologize for words that weren't even mine. Strange place, this.


04 Nov 00 - 09:53 PM (#334845)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Troll

What's strange about it. You're the Kid. You're fair game. It is our responsibility to pick at you and insult your taste in music and the like.
It toughens you up and makes you more able to deal with those prople who DON'T care about you. But you, you ungrateful little wretch, have the nerve to complain about the very people (Spaw, Kendall, et al) who are trying, out of the goodness of their hearts, to save you heartaches in later life.
Do you actually think I ENJOY this?
I'd much rather be sitting in my cave sipping a root beer and listening to music.
So go on off and listen to Old Aces or whatever that band is. Don't give a thought to those of us who are trying to do things that are really for your own good.

troll (snik snik snik)


04 Nov 00 - 09:58 PM (#334849)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: WyoWoman

Catspaw, I do so wish we had an artist her in Mudcat who could illustrate some of your inventions. This one just about takes the cake.

And Carol,you might be right about there being "at least 100 men who would gladly give her a good poke...." although I question the "good" part ...

ww


04 Nov 00 - 09:59 PM (#334851)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

SPAW...YOU ARE KILLING ME!! Sinsull, I'm glad you are not ugly, otherwise, I wouldnt dare go where you are!


04 Nov 00 - 10:05 PM (#334856)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: catspaw49

Well WW, I built a few of them, like the "Amish-Australian Pitchfork Moustache Tuner" which is now in the possession of Musicman...He showed it to Bill Staines last week, but didn't let him try it......

Now this one would be a prodigious undertaking.............

Spaw


04 Nov 00 - 10:09 PM (#334860)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: kendall

according to you, you already have the 22" wang. I'm sure you will rise to the occasion!


04 Nov 00 - 10:17 PM (#334864)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Troll

I dunno. That much weight out front could be a problem. Balance you know. You'd need a pretty hefty bit of weight behind to counter the tendency to tip over.If you tip over forwards it could break something important not to mention being painful.
And then there's the problem of blood supply....
This 'un is gonna take a lotta thought.

troll


04 Nov 00 - 10:39 PM (#334878)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: GUEST,Joerg

Kendall, I hope you won't consider to become normal, will you. This would be CRAZY.

;->

Joerg


04 Nov 00 - 11:06 PM (#334890)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Art Thieme

I was just giving a generic apology---**smile**-one that'd cover any sin I might've committed somewhere along my Mudcat timeline **smile**. There was no point to the posting at all. **smile**

'Twas meant to be irony (in the Fielding sense)--**smile**--humorous too. **smile** But it seems to be one more time that nobody got my joke. Maybe I should go back to talking about condoms...***BIG SMILE***

Art


04 Nov 00 - 11:23 PM (#334899)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: MK

A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The woman below replied, "You are in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You are between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be a Production Manager," said the balloonist.
"I am," replied the woman, "how did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I am still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help so far."

The woman below responded, "You must be a Producer." "I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you are going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault."


MK
(-thought some might enjoy this distraction-)


04 Nov 00 - 11:33 PM (#334902)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Troll

LOL

troll


05 Nov 00 - 12:04 AM (#334916)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: JedMarum

I am sorry too - sorry I missed the original, offending comment!


05 Nov 00 - 12:11 AM (#334922)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: catspaw49

Well hell Jed, just hang around a bit and I'm pretty sure Kendall will crank out something else equally offensive. Its only a matter of time..............

Spaw


05 Nov 00 - 02:39 AM (#334965)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: Murray MacLeod

Well I guess I did get lucky tonight, but only insofar as I didn't forget any words and my guitar stayed in tune. Since none of you has posted in the last two hours, I guess you all must have got luckier still. Hope I get luckier on Tuesday, if Gore wins I will be able to afford a trip back to Scotland ....


05 Nov 00 - 03:56 AM (#334970)
Subject: RE: BS: Kendalls apology
From: The Shambles

Abortion:Here we Go. The original thread which does contain some very good stuff.