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14 Nov 00 - 11:52 AM (#340504) Subject: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Micca Anyone have the lyrics of this Miles Wootton song its the one that goes,
Sitting in the garden in my little Noddy suit
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14 Nov 00 - 11:54 AM (#340507) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Wavestar Can't help, but it sounds fun... -J |
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14 Nov 00 - 11:58 AM (#340511) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Dave the Gnome It's a gross slander, I tell you!!! I need the address of this Mr Wooten so my lawyers can get in touch with his. Dave the fun Gnome |
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14 Nov 00 - 01:08 PM (#340561) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Lanfranc Micca, I've got this on a Derek Brimstone LP. When I get chance, I'll post it for you |
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14 Nov 00 - 01:18 PM (#340569) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Noreen Sounds just the thing for you to sing this weekend, Dave? **VBG** Noreen |
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14 Nov 00 - 05:46 PM (#340736) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Catrin Dave - I thought you were trying to tell us something! *VVBG* |
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14 Nov 00 - 05:46 PM (#340737) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Liz the Squeak Micca, why didn't you just ask - we could have given you a copy on Saturday! You should know by now to always ask your Uncle Manitas first.... And him an honourable member of the Gnome Club..... We actually have it on tape somewhere - I'll see what I can do about transcribing it for everyone. LTS, who actually married a gnome. Thank heaven it wasn't a troll. |
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14 Nov 00 - 06:44 PM (#340774) Subject: Lyr Add: THE GNOME (from Bernard Bolan) From: Stewie Dave the Gnome, here's another one for your lawyers. Bernard Bolan should be able to take them on because he is a lawyer as well as songwriter. Sorry I can't post a tune, but other Oz people such as John in Brisbane, Bugsy, Bob Bolton etc should know this and may be able to post one. I not certain about the 'Snow White' line, but it is what it sounds like. Bernard has been delighting audiences with this for decades: ^^ THE GNOME (Bernard Bolan) Both dusk and dawn I sit on the lawn For the whole of the livelong day Though at night I dance, by day my stance Will never move nor sway My cheeks are red and me cap is too Me ears both flap and me coat is blue When doggies crap, I've a birdseye view I'm a gnome, a gnome I sit on me arse on the green, green grass Beneath the cherry tree Though made of stone, it is very well known My heart is full of glee That is why I always smile I only frown but once in a while When doggies piddle, it's rather vile For a gnome, a gnome So you will see if you're following me It's dogs that I don't like And neither would you if they made you the loo And used you for the dyke I'll bet their pet will never forget The day they had to call the vet The bloody last time he'll try to wet A gnome, a gnome I'm not an elf, I'm not a sprite, I'm not a dwarf That gets Snow White I'm not a fairy so get it right I'm a gnome, a gnome So it's eyes to the floor with your motor mower As you bowl across the green When bashed in the bum, I can become Both mischievous and mean I'll trip you up in your goddam flat Don't forget me pointed hat A terrible sight is a man who's sat On a gnome, a gnome Gremlin, goblin, imp and spook You find us all in the magic book But you can see if you'll take one look I'm a gnome, a gnome So maybe when you think of me You will not scowl and scorn And maybe you won't knock me down When you try to mow the lawn So remember Harry, Dick and Tommy Call me gnome and not g-nommy You will make me happy if you will call me An ever loving gnome Source: transcription from Bernard Bolan 'An Eccentric Collection' E E Eclectic Enterprises EEEE 2000-1 CD. PS. Cheers, Stewie.
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14 Nov 00 - 07:44 PM (#340797) Subject: Lyr Add: THE GNOME (Miles Wootton) From: Bugsy It's actually written by Miles Wootton. ^^ THE GNOME
I'm sitting in the garden in my little Noddy suit
The kids have knocked my nose off, and my boots are getting thin,
Well, long ago I used to be a king upon a throne.
I'm sitting here a fishing but these fishes never bite.
There's a doggy comes to see me every evening after tea,
My earhole's full of cobwebs and my doublet doesn't fit.
But I'll sit here in the garden in my little Noddy suit. Cheers Bugsy |
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14 Nov 00 - 08:01 PM (#340804) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: magician I was in the proccess of writing it out whrn you did Bugsy. By the way it was written by an old friend Paul Lucas. Your words are not quite the original but they are near enough. |
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14 Nov 00 - 08:05 PM (#340808) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Bugsy Well, Magician, Derek Brimstone gives credit to Miles Wootton on his album "Very Good Time" and Miles Wootton gives himself credit for it on his album "Sunday Supplement World". Maybe you should check with your friend again. CHeers Bugsy |
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14 Nov 00 - 10:09 PM (#340839) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Bob Bolton G'day Stewie (and all other gnomes), I have always heard these lines thus:
I'm not an elf, I'm not a sprite, I'm not a dwarf - I don't have the tune written out anywhere ... I could ask Bernard if he has, but I suspect he just sings it! Perhaps some keen fan has transcribed it. I should have a link somewhere to Bernard's schizoid Lawyer/Singer-songwriter web site, but it seems not to have survived the last corporate computer upgrade. Regards, Bob Bolton |
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14 Nov 00 - 11:25 PM (#340870) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: alison I always thought it was "forget Snow White"... although "who gets......" sounds like the relationship wasn't entirely innocent *grin*........ slainte alison |
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15 Nov 00 - 12:05 AM (#340899) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Stewie Hi Bob, thanks for the corrections - I thought 'goddam' was a bit American for Bernard, but couldn't work it out. The lad should improve his diction. Cheers, Stewie. |
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15 Nov 00 - 03:29 AM (#340948) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Micca Bugsy, Many thanks thats exactly the song, and if I get time for a quick bit of practice, I might give it a go this w/e in Manchester at "Son of Llanstock". I always understood it was by Miles Wootton,both from the person I first heard sing it, and I had a tape of the album, but that seems to have vanished.still many thanks again, |
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15 Nov 00 - 07:26 AM (#340994) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: John in Brisbane While I've heard Bernard do his song a few times the tune goes a bit troppo in the B part and I certainly can only vaguely recall it. Regards, John |
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15 Nov 00 - 07:35 AM (#340998) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: manitas_at_work Fol-re-rol |
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15 Nov 00 - 07:38 PM (#341427) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Liz the Squeak Manitas was always a little weird, I think that's why I married him.... And it is Miles Wootton. He said so himself. LTS |
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16 Nov 00 - 01:54 AM (#341559) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: jacko@nz Always new it as 'Forget Snow white' |
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16 Nov 00 - 09:49 PM (#342121) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Bob Bolton G'day again, OK ... the extra 's' got I missed when I did a 'cut & paste on Stewie's words ... for our pedantic friends:
I'm not an elf, I'm not a sprite, I'm not a dwarf - Regard(les)s, Bob Bolton |
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17 Nov 00 - 08:19 AM (#342270) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Noreen Gnomes always go around saying 'Fol-de-rol', didn't you know, Liz? |
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17 Nov 00 - 08:24 AM (#342273) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: manitas_at_work No. No. It's trolls wot say Fol-de-rol. Like in the 3 Billy Goats Gruff. |
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17 Nov 00 - 08:30 AM (#342277) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Noreen Ah- someone with inside knowledge! I stand corrected... so were you doing an impersonation then? |
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17 Nov 00 - 09:07 AM (#342290) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: alison "I'm a troll, fol-de-rol... and I'll have you for dinner" *grin* slainte alison |
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21 May 07 - 09:40 AM (#2057618) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: GUEST Hey BUGSY. Are you the same from Soul Survivor? If so can you please contact Dunc at dunc@dyason.me.uk |
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21 May 07 - 11:03 AM (#2057683) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: GUEST,leeneia Most interesting. What's a Noddy suit? |
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21 May 07 - 11:10 AM (#2057688) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: The Fooles Troupe As in "Noddy & Big Ears" - ex Enid Blyton... |
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21 May 07 - 01:39 PM (#2057793) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Micca For a Noddy Suit see Here its the boy with the Pointy hat |
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21 May 07 - 01:50 PM (#2057801) Subject: Lyr Add: THERE'S A GNOME IN MY GARDEN From: RTim While on the "Gnome" theme - does anyone know where the following song comes from. I "think" I heard it at Sidmouth Festival many, many years ago (at a children's event). I learnt it and sang it to my kids, and I sometimes sing it when the occasion demands, and even had it collected off me at Pinewoods Camp Folk Music week last year. THERE'S A GNOME IN MY GARDEN. There's a gnome in my garden His name is Hob. He has an unusual sort of job, He stands for hours in his little coat of red Fishing for fish in the flower bed. Shhh, shhh, don't say a word, he'd be most upset If he thought it was absurd. Wouldn't it be funny if a fish with fins & gills Would swim in secret somewhere among the daffodils. Shhh, shhh, don't say a word he'd be most upset If he knew it were absurd. Tim Radford |
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24 May 07 - 12:37 AM (#2059540) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: Jim Dixon Miles Wootton: In this thread alone, we have it spelled Wooton, Wooten, Whooton, and Whooten, but I think the correct spelling is Wootton. At least that's how it's spelled at Hat Records, Amazon.co.uk, The Dartford Folk Club Web Site, Musical Traditions (mustrad.org.uk), Patty Vetta and Alan Franks' web site, Old Bridge Music.... |
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24 May 07 - 11:33 AM (#2059898) Subject: Lyr Add: CAN'T YOU STAND TO LET HIM GO? From: Uncle_DaveO On the subject of this thread, here's a song I wrote a few years ago: CAN'T YOU STAND TO LET HIM GO? C All ye gentlemen and ladies, G7 Won't you listen to my song? It's about our little brothers C Who stand out upon the lawn. C7 F Garden Gnomes who stand and shiver in the cold, G7 C Pity Gnomes who stand and shiver in the cold. CHORUS: C7 F He's the little man that drips there in the rain. G7 C He's the little man that shivers in the snow. C7 He's the little man that swelters F in the hot and broiling sun. G7 C Gents and ladies, can't you stand to let him go? Have ye got a heart of iron? Have ye got a soul of stone? Have ye not a shred of pity For the Gnome who stands alone? For the Gnome who herds flamingoes 'cross your lawn. Poor old Gnome who herds flamingoes 'cross your lawn. CHORUS: And he's the little man that drips there in the rain. He's the little man that shivers in the snow. He's the little man that swelters in the hot and broiling sun. Gents and ladies, can't you stand to let him go? Oh, I call on your humanity, I call upon your heart To abolish this vile slav'ry Of the little men of art. Gnomes whose only sin is being made of stone! They whose only sin is being made of stone! CHORUS: And he's the little man that drips there in the rain. He's the little man that shivers in the snow. He's the little man that swelters in the hot and broiling sun. Gents and ladies, can't you stand to let him go? CODA: He's the little man whose nose drips in the rain; Turns to icicles a-standin' in the snow. He's the little man who sweats a ton, Standin' there in the noonday sun. Gents and ladies, can't you let him go? Dave Oesterreich |
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07 Sep 07 - 02:55 AM (#2143070) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Not much fun being a Gnome From: GUEST,James 2179 Hi, I would love to be able to play the Not much fun being a gnome song on the Guitar. Does anyone have the chords they could share with me. Thanks in advance. |
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16 Nov 07 - 07:40 PM (#2195651) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST,miles wootton blimey! going back a bit! Suggest you buy mt CD with Gnome on it.Only £10 guv inclusive of p&p. Miles Wootton 102 Carden Avenue.BRIGHTON BNI 8ne Tel 01273 504878 |
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17 Nov 07 - 08:15 AM (#2195866) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Leadfingers And Miles' CD is EXCELLENT value - A whole pile of superb songs !! |
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17 Nov 07 - 12:45 PM (#2196062) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: breezy Norman is my gnome and busks with me, he is famous in Padstow and St Albans I adopted him back in the late 60s at the Crypt folk club of St Mary's Church in Woolwich S E London He will be most interested in this thread btw Norman says, its 'Hissing down with rain' and Norman is usually right, and his fishing rod is well and truly u s |
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12 Dec 07 - 05:59 PM (#2214114) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST,miles wootton contact me at mileswootton@btinternet.com |
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23 May 09 - 06:14 PM (#2639566) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: mileswootton It's on my CD "The Least Worst of Miles Wootton" £10 including P@P. My phone is 01273 504878 |
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30 May 10 - 06:18 PM (#2917390) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: mileswootton Gnome and other songs are on my CD ""The Least Worst of Miles Wootton" Ten quid including P&P from me at 102 Carden Avenue Brighton , BN1 8NE Tel: 01273 504878 |
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30 May 10 - 06:27 PM (#2917396) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Leadfingers To repeat what I said in Nov 07 , its an excellent CD ! BUY IT !! |
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31 May 10 - 09:58 AM (#2917649) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST,leeneia I've learned something interesting stuff about garden gnomes: "The first garden gnomes were introduced to the United Kingdom in 1847 by Sir Charles Isham, when he brought 21 terracotta figures back from a trip to Germany and placed them around the gardens of his home, Lamport Hall in Northamptonshire. Only one of the original batch of gnomes survives: Lampy as he is known, is on display at Lamport Hall, and is insured for one million pounds. Garden gnomes have become a popular accessory in many gardens, although they are not loved by all. They can be the target of pranks: people have been known to "return to the wild" these garden gnomes, most notably France's "Front de Liberation des Nains de Jardins" and Italy's "MALAG" (Garden Gnome Liberation Front). Some kidnapped garden gnomes have been sent on trips around the world, being passed from person to person and photographed at different famous landmarks, with the photos being returned to the owner." As for that last, I once watched a French movie, 'Amalie,' where that was going on. Thanks for posting, everybody. |
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09 Jun 11 - 03:28 AM (#3167475) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST,john bacon Hi did anyone ever find the chords for the Gnome by Miles Wootton |
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09 Jun 11 - 10:05 AM (#3167636) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Leadfingers GUEST john bacon Miles Wootton has posted his E Mail AND address - Why not ask the man who wrote it ? |
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08 Oct 12 - 07:33 AM (#3416254) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST Not convinced it is Miles Wootton. I understood it was the late Fred Wedlock who wrote it - and so did the two guys I learnt it from. |
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08 Oct 12 - 07:03 PM (#3416658) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Leadfingers Fred Wedlock was a very clever and entertaining peformer , and a thief of the first order . He wrote a number of very good songs , but did NOT write the Gnome song - That is definately Miles Wootton's . I am happy to admit to being a Song Thief myself , and have stolen songs (AND credited them to) Fred Wedlock AND Miles W . |
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08 Oct 12 - 08:33 PM (#3416719) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Bugsy GUEST,James 2179 Here's the chords, rightly or wrongly, as I play them. I hope they help. THE GNOME C Am D7 G I'm sitting in the garden in my little Noddy suit C Am D7 G With a sparrow on me fishing rod and frog spawn in my boot F C Am Oh it's tiddling down with rain, I've got water on the brain, D7 G G7 But I'll sit here by the pond like King Canute. C Am D7 \G The kids have knocked my nose off, and my boots are getting thin, C Am D7 G And the way that they all treat me here, it really is a sin. F C Am And there's a pigeon I can see, he's aiming straight for me, D7 G C C7 And the gardener strikes his matches on my shin. F G Well, long ago I used to be a king upon a throne. F C I met a wicked fairy and she turned me into stone. F C Am D7 And that is why I'm sitting in this garden all alone. D7 G G7 It's not much fun being a gnome. And so on, and so forth..... Cheers Bugsy |
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09 Oct 12 - 09:16 AM (#3416897) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST,JimI When I was in an English Civil War Re-enactment regiment many years ago Miles's song was part of the initiation ceremony. New members had to sit in shirtsleeves around the campfire holding sticks (aka fishing rods)while the others sang the song (well, about three verses of it). Upon repeating the first verse (piddling down with rain) buckets of cold water were upended over the heads of the newbies. What fun was had by all! |
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09 Oct 12 - 09:34 AM (#3416904) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Vic Smith Not convinced it is Miles Wootton. I understood it was the late Fred Wedlock who wrote it - and so did the two guys I learnt it from. Miles Wootton - a friend for over 40 years - wrote the song and his singing of it was popular in Brighton area folk clubs a good while before Fred Wedlock heard it at the Stanford Arms Folk Club when he was the guest there. I was there the night Fred heard it and remember Fred's enthusiasm for the song. Later, Miles heard from Fred telling him that he wanted to record it, but if he did then the writing credit on the album would be to Wedlock/Wootton. Fred followed this up by saying that if Miles did not agree to this then he would not record it so the choice was between royalties of 50% of something or 100% of nothing. Miles opted to allow Fred to record it and to attribute a half of the writing credit. |
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11 Nov 12 - 11:47 AM (#3434769) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST,cliffmac http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A13FuixaquU |
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11 Nov 12 - 03:55 PM (#3434884) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: The Sandman Thanks,Vic. Fred,imo,comes across as an exploiter |
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12 Nov 12 - 05:29 AM (#3435095) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Nigel Parsons 50. (that's a gnome-sized 100) As this thread seems to be collecting Gnome songs, here's one form an Earlier thread THE GNOMES SEX CHANGE Nigel Parsons 14/4/11 (apologies to Ewan MacColl) I'm a gnom-ee, I'm a gnom-ee from Manchester way I've taken my pleasures the good laddish way Renouncing that may seem quite churlish But now I want pleasures quite girlish. The day was just ending, as I was descending To Glasto, just South of the Tor And being quite dense, I jumped over a fence The wire ripped through the britches I wore. It also ripped right through my manhood (gnome-hood?) Leaving me terribly sore. And the doctor he said, without laughing! That I could be a dad-gnome no more! I'm a gnom-ee, I'm a gnom-ee from Manchester way I've taken my pleasures the good laddish way Renouncing that may seem quite churlish But now I want pleasures quite girlish. The specialist said I'd lost more than my 'head' In truth, I'd lost most of my dick. And tho' skin's quite elastic; still with surgery plastic I'd more chance of a 'cave' than a 'pick' (sorry, dwarvish joke, I couldn't resist it despite the pain!) I made up my mind in a jiffy Though what I was losing was small. The internal workings are iffy The unkindest cut of them all! I'm a gnom-ee, I'm a gnom-ee from Manchester way I've taken my pleasures the good laddish way Renouncing that may seem quite churlish But now I want pleasures quite girlish. Now I go where I will, over valley & hill And I don't care what other gnomes think I remember my fate, I use stile or gate! And my beard I've dyed a light pink So I can still go on a bender When to folk club, or folk fest I roam. For no-one there questions my gender. It matters to none but a gnome. I'm a gnom-ee, I'm a gnom-ee from Manchester way I've taken my pleasures the good laddish way Renouncing that may seem quite churlish But now I want pleasures quite girlish. |
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13 Nov 12 - 03:22 AM (#3435658) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Bugsy Cliffmac, I think that version is perhaps the worst I have heard. CHeers Bugsy |
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13 Nov 12 - 03:26 AM (#3435659) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Bugsy Not only does this guy change the words, he changed the tune as well! Is this to evade royalties I wonder? CHeers Bugsy |
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13 Nov 12 - 08:03 AM (#3435738) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Leadfingers Sadly its all too common for people to take someone else's song , make a couple of minor changes , then copyright it ! Try posting anything to You Tube and see what some clown has a copyright on !!! |
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13 Nov 12 - 09:12 AM (#3435762) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST how about the Village production of Hamlet ? Let us acknowledge Allan 'spud' Taylor who was probably one of if not the first to sing the Gnome to a wider public I heard him perform it at the first Boadstairs fest breezy |
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13 Nov 12 - 10:10 AM (#3435800) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Vic Smith http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A13FuixaquU A truly dreadful, sickly sweet mangling of the great original by Miles. |
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15 Nov 12 - 05:23 PM (#3437088) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST,Jim I Derek Brimstone currently on ebay for £10. 8 hours to go (currently 10.30pm) Includes The Gnome |
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15 Nov 12 - 07:02 PM (#3437133) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: Leadfingers GAWD Vic - That version is TRULY Awful - Does Miles know about it ? And I sang it tonight at Maidenhead - dare I say a LOT better than that ! |
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15 Jun 14 - 06:49 PM (#3633365) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST If you check it out properly you will notice he has given writing credit to Miles Wooton! |
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16 Jun 14 - 12:32 AM (#3633416) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST,Bugsy(who keeps eating my cookies?) As he should. CHeers Bugsy
-Joe Offer- |
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16 Jan 22 - 04:55 AM (#4132537) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: The Gnome (Miles Wootton) From: GUEST Not sure if you have got all the Lyrics for The Gnome. If not let me know as I have them all. Cheers Carrie |