To Thread - Forum Home

The Mudcat Café TM
https://mudcat.org/thread.cfm?threadid=29648
35 messages

BS: You're Now President - Questions?

16 Jan 01 - 11:21 PM (#375891)
Subject: You're Now President - Questions?
From: GUEST,Conspiracy Buff

You've been elected President of The United States. You have complete access to all C.I.A., N.S.A., O.S.S. and F.B.I. files, data bases and info gathered for the entire history of the 20th century.

What are the first questions you'd ask (assuming you're finally in a position to get the real, straight dope) that have puzzled you (and countless others) this century?
I have a few.

What really happened at Roswell? And what really happened with the Philadephia experiment?
Who shot JFK and who were the co-conspirators and their motivations? (and was Marilyn Monroe's death really a suicide?)
The real scoop on the Philadephia experiment?
Is immortality or an extreme retardation of the aging process scientifically or medically possible, now? (but suppressed because we'd overpopulate the world?)

Anyone else?


16 Jan 01 - 11:23 PM (#375892)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Matt_R

I just want to know who put the bop in the bop-she-bop-she-bop.


16 Jan 01 - 11:30 PM (#375895)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Sorcha

Who put the ram in the ram de pam pam?
What does the gov't really know about Crop Circles?
Why wasn't Patton really allowed to go to Russia?
Was J. Edgar Hoover really gay?
Did Harry Truman really stop the buck?
lots more........


16 Jan 01 - 11:36 PM (#375904)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Matt_R

Who rammed Pam? Maybe Spaw can help us with that one...


16 Jan 01 - 11:52 PM (#375910)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Sorcha

ROFLMAO!!! Oh, Good one, Matt!!


16 Jan 01 - 11:59 PM (#375912)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: katlaughing

Jimmy Carter got warned off when he tried to get some serious answers.


17 Jan 01 - 12:07 AM (#375914)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: catspaw49

I bammed a Pam. Only one Pam that I recall, but I freely admit to a few whose names I couldn't recall in the morning. This particular Pam was a college buddy thing (both of us in between "real" things) and she now runs an artsy-fartsy gallery in the town where we went to school.

Spaw


17 Jan 01 - 12:20 AM (#375917)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Troll

Well I wonder wonder who and I wonder who* who wrote the book of love.

troll


17 Jan 01 - 12:49 AM (#375922)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Sorcha

Who will stop the rain?


17 Jan 01 - 12:56 AM (#375927)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Lox

I'd ask who was in charge.

lox


17 Jan 01 - 01:05 AM (#375930)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Sorcha

kat, doesn't that just prove that it is NOT the Prez that is really in charge? Quite a few of us have known that for a long time, huh?


17 Jan 01 - 01:33 AM (#375945)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: katlaughing

Yep, Sorcha, it's that whole "shadow government" thing, ins't it? Anyone ever read the novel "Money" by Arthur Hailey? I am sure it is out of date, but it was a fascinating look at the actual way in which money is transported, transferred, etc. in the financial world.


17 Jan 01 - 01:49 AM (#375948)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: SeanM

I'd ask "How the heck did I get elected? Is this a joke? What kind of schmuck did I run against that I looked like the better option? No, really, is this a joke?"

Oh... oops... those are the questions the REAL president elect would be asking...

Duck 'n' cover!

M


17 Jan 01 - 02:05 AM (#375951)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Amergin

I'm sorry, but I don't want the job....I find that it is too much fun to critisise those who do have it...


17 Jan 01 - 02:06 AM (#375952)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: CarolC

Why did Ronnie have the solar panels removed from the White House, and how much do we have to pay the University of Maine at Orono to get them back?


17 Jan 01 - 02:17 AM (#375954)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Sorcha

Carol--just a guess--Because they destroyed the architectual integrity of the structre.....(I didn't know there were any, let alone that they were removed)


17 Jan 01 - 02:18 AM (#375955)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Amergin

or is that criticise?.....need to learn how to proofread


17 Jan 01 - 03:43 AM (#375969)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: CarolC

Hi Sorcha. Most people don't know they were there. I guess they weren't too noticable. My understanding of the situation is that he felt they sent the wrong signal to Americans- Oil = Bad, and Solar = Good.


17 Jan 01 - 03:45 AM (#375971)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: CarolC

Let me correct that last one. It should say, Fossil Fuels = Bad, and Solar = Good


17 Jan 01 - 03:47 AM (#375973)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: CarolC

And maybe the Nuclear Power Industry deserves a mention as well.


17 Jan 01 - 04:22 AM (#375987)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler

1)Who got the Chads pregnant?
2)How did Roger the Skiffler bugger up 'Spaw's wonderful Poppin' Off thread despite all Brother Joe's html instructions?
RtS (off to clean all the washrooms at the NYCFTTS with his toothbrush as a pennace)


17 Jan 01 - 04:30 AM (#375990)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler

(Sigh)yeah, yeah, always proofread: PENANCE!
RtS (I'd shoot myself but as Steve Parkes once wisely remarked, if I did I'd probably miss!)


17 Jan 01 - 12:57 PM (#376277)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Kim C

I'd wanna know about that big-ass warehouse that was in Raiders of the Lost Ark.


17 Jan 01 - 01:04 PM (#376283)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: mousethief

I understood there were, back in the glory days of the Roman Catholic Church (circa 1490), people who really got a kick out of that whole PENANCE thing. In fact they went around doing other people's penances for them. They didn't ask them nicely if they could do it for htem, either. They actually stole the other people's penances and did them, whether or not that other person consented!

They were called....

The Pirates of Penance

O..O
=o=


17 Jan 01 - 01:40 PM (#376316)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: GUEST,petr

how do you spruce up dad's antique cabinet.


17 Jan 01 - 05:51 PM (#376498)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Abby Sale

One night, George W. Bush was awakened by George Washington's ghost. Bush asked, "George, what is the best thing I could do to help the country, now that I am elected President?"

"Set an honest and honourable example, just as I did," advised George. The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson moved through the dark bedroom. "Tom, what is the best thing I could do to help the country, now that I am elected President?" Bush asked. "Cut taxes and reduce the size of government," advised Tom.

Bush didn't sleep well the next night, and saw yet another figure moving in the shadows. It was Abraham Lincoln's ghost. "Abe, what is the best thing I could do for the country, now that I have been elected President?" Bush asked. "Go to the theatre," replied Abe.


17 Jan 01 - 06:30 PM (#376528)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Max

George Washington's inauguration speech, in no uncertain terms, said that the United States could do better than he. Far more integrity that the new W would exibit.

I would want to know a few important things:

Publishing/Copyright/Itelectual Property Rights Reform.

Aliens. Any proof? Communication? Anti-Gravity? New energy sources? etc.

Time Travel. What do we know so far? Why don't we know more? Get working you nerds!

Legalize/DeCriminalize certain controlled substances.

What's the real scoop on "Catcher in the Rye"?

etc.


17 Jan 01 - 10:02 PM (#376634)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: GUEST

click here


17 Jan 01 - 10:37 PM (#376652)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: flattop

It wasn't a great parody, Guest, but I hadn't thought of Curious George in a long while. Thanks for reminding me. I used to scramble the Curious George stories that my youngest son knew as I read them. After two or three times he started doing it himself.


17 Jan 01 - 11:13 PM (#376672)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: GUEST

here is what I ponder from time to time.

1: Why don't we build houses out of stone? Rocks, cement, whatever and save the trees.... 2. Why are paper diapers and cat litter allowed in garbage dumps? Won't that spread disease? Tell me it doesn't in Mexico for example. 3. Why do they grind up dead cows and feed them to other cows? Why do they feed dead fish to other fish? 4. Why don't we insist people graduate from high school with saleable skills? 5. Why is there no place (that I have seen) for Arab-Americans to register their ethnicity in college applications etc. 6. Why don't we have more village systems like boys town at least for kids that have been through multiple foster homes, especially abusive or unsatisfactory ones. 7. why don't we put little generators or whatever in the ocean and harness some energy there? 8. that is all for now.


18 Jan 01 - 07:53 AM (#376857)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Troll

Why don't "GUESTS" sign their names? What are they afraid of? Aren't they aware that they CAN sign their names?Or a name.

troll


18 Jan 01 - 09:49 AM (#376912)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Kim C

Guest, you should know that fish eat other fish anyhow. If you don't believe me just watch some of those National Geographic and Nature programs on PBS.


18 Jan 01 - 11:11 AM (#376968)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: GUEST

Mr. or Ms. Troll: that was me with the 8 questions. i know how to sign my name. for some reason the system changed and it didn't put it in automatically. What we all need in our lives is more gratuitous rudeness. m. garvey


18 Jan 01 - 12:12 PM (#377016)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Troll

Mary, I was not trying to be rude. Had I been, you would have known it. Perhaps my question was not phrased in the manner you would prefer but it was an honest and serious one.
You are not the only person on this thread who has posted as "GUEST". You managed to sign your name this time so I suppose that the previous post was an oversight.
As far as my gender is concerned, if you will review a few of my other posts, you will find that I frequently refer to my wife "The Memsahib".

troll


18 Jan 01 - 12:14 PM (#377017)
Subject: RE: BS: You're Now President - Questions?
From: Mooh

It had to be asked, did it not?

Where's Monica?

Mooh.