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27 Nov 01 - 09:12 PM (#598984) Subject: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Morticia I don't know about anyone else in this collection of lunatics loosely described as 'Catters but tonight, for the first time since I checked last year, I clicked on my own name, to see how long I'd been here.......don't ask me why, I was bored, okay? I came to realise that my whole life history, well, two years of it......milestones, griefs,celebrations, bafflement etc. are pretty much all there in chronological order. What a wondrous thing for a woman who can seldom remember what she had for breakfast, let alone what was happening three months ago and how she felt about it. I was stunned! It hasn't been the happiest of years and I still have 'stuff' to wade through but I was actually comforted by this record of it. Am I completely wierd or what? And does anyone else read back on a regular basis and if so, what are your thoughts about it now? |
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27 Nov 01 - 09:17 PM (#598989) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: SINSULL Yeah. Every time I do it I make a resolution to post at least one music-related post for every bit of nonsense I add to the forum. Somehow it never happens. How does Matsuto do it? |
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27 Nov 01 - 09:17 PM (#598990) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: catspaw49 Actually Mortie, you are weird. Enjoy it! As for reading back through my old posts, I generally avoided this before I got the cable modem. First, it took hours to load and then my browser would crash. Now I can do it with ease, but reading "War and Peace" takes less time........... We love you though......Just keep that in mind huh? Spaw |
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27 Nov 01 - 09:19 PM (#598992) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: CarolC I love that I've got a history in print of my life here in the Mudcat. What a precious gift. |
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27 Nov 01 - 09:22 PM (#598997) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Sorcha You are not weird, Morty. I do it too. Just to remind myself that.......uh, that, uh, I forget just what. Anyway, thanks for all the jokes. Stay cool. As Clinton says, "Better to be dead and cool, than alive and un cool" |
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27 Nov 01 - 11:19 PM (#599079) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: wysiwyg Sorch, are you reading your posts or Mortie's??? ~S~ |
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28 Nov 01 - 12:20 AM (#599132) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: katlaughing Yeah, I do it, too, Mortee and I think it is a wonderful way to look back and see where we were at. I just reminded Rog on his birthday this year, Halloween, that last year it was cold and snowy and he had to go out of town to fix some equipment. It was nice to be able to point out a positive contrast. I've been "mining" my postings, for thoughts for the day and other things to put into a small book. It's been very fun and interesting to go back and read. I am also working on doing the same thing for another Catter and hope to make it into a fundraiser for them. Good for you and thanks for this thread. It sure is nice to see more of you, darlin'. luvyakat |
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28 Nov 01 - 12:25 AM (#599137) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: katlaughing Forgot to ask you to please explain the title of the thread...some sort of UK expression? I thought I knew most of them, but it's thrown me a bit, like the first time Micca used MOG, and I don't mean short for moggie.:-) |
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28 Nov 01 - 01:14 AM (#599162) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Liz the Squeak Yes, Kat, I never did understand MOG.... Well I'll go.... is a sort of exclaimation on the lines of 'well goodness me! Well bugger me! Will you look at that! I'm temporarily rendered incapable of speech by the unexpected revelation of what has just occurred!' It doesn't actually mean you to go to the bottom of the stairs, but that's usually a good place to stand if you want to be hit in the arse by the postman posting magazines through the letterbox. Enlightenend?? Morty, I do it too, and it shames me to realise I've been here over 2 years! All that time I could have been eating chocolate (and frequently was!!) We've posted some crap between us ain't we!! LTS |
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28 Nov 01 - 06:40 AM (#599234) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Lanfranc Oh, heck, I wish I hadn't done that! Can one delete the posts (drunken, late at night, stoned ..) that make you cringe when you re-read them? Must press [Clear Entries] instead of [Submit Message] more often! You are what you post! Alan |
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28 Nov 01 - 06:43 AM (#599236) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: GUEST,micca at work. well ,I'll go to the foot of our stairs!!!! MOG = Miserable Old Git |
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28 Nov 01 - 06:55 AM (#599241) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: The_one_and_only_Dai ee, it's black over Bill's mother's... |
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28 Nov 01 - 08:47 AM (#599284) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Gervase Bloody hell, I've just done the same thing - and it's weird. You really do get a snapshot of a chunk of your life (which, for those of us here with brains like Swiss cheese and memories to match, is amazing) But there are some wholly cringe-worthy things there as well. Was I really that pompous, po-faced and up-my-own arse back then? Was I really so optimistic? Could I not have foreseen the pitfalls and pratfalls to come? Probably "no" to all of the above, but it is a fascinating slice of life. |
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28 Nov 01 - 10:08 AM (#599343) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: SharonA Well, I've only done it once so far, but I haven't been here that long! I do wish there was a way to "define" the search ("show me so-and-so's posts from this date to that date") to avoid error messages and crashes. This would circumvent problems when, for instance, one is trying to read the past posts of one's Secret Santee for clues about the present(s) one should be shopping for! |
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28 Nov 01 - 03:22 PM (#599573) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: John MacKenzie I don't go through mine, and I hope that nobody else does either. The one thing I do have filed away though is two PMs containing personal abuse from someone whom I'm ashamed to say is a fellow mudcatter. I'd like to get rid of them, how do you clear your PM archive though? Slight thread creep there I know, but it's part of the cyber tradition. Failte.. Jock |
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28 Nov 01 - 07:34 PM (#599779) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Jim Dixon Giok: I just checked, and on my archive of personal messages, there's a "delete" link in the far right column of the list. That means you can delete the messages one at a time, but this could be a tedious process for those who have a lot of messages. As far as I know, there's no way to purge a whole bunch of messages at once. By the way, is "Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs!" a folk expression of some sort? I've never encountered it before. |
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28 Nov 01 - 07:44 PM (#599785) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: 8_Pints First heard the expression "Well I'll go to the foot of our stairs!" in a Les Barker piece on radio. The originality of the man was evident from another of his sayings ...... "Is the first time you experience de ja vu really the second!" Bob vG |
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28 Nov 01 - 07:50 PM (#599792) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Murray MacLeod I could be wrong here, but I would guess that the phrase in question is A. Of Yorkshire origin, and B originated as the catchphrase of some comedian, in the days when you had to have a catchphrase. If you were a comedian, that is. Although there was no reason not to have a catchphrase even if you weren't a comedian. LtS's explanation abaove explains exactly what the phrase means. My ex-mother in law used to say this in her beautiful Yorkshire accent. She also made heavy use of the phrase "daft as a brush", which I never really understood ............ Murray |
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28 Nov 01 - 07:56 PM (#599795) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: John Routledge After a year on Cat it should be made compulsory that Catters read their "history" before being allowed to post further. Haven't dared to read mine yet - can't face the cringes :0) Cheers and happy reading. Geordie |
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28 Nov 01 - 09:03 PM (#599842) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Banjer Before I would go back and reread all my ramblings and quite probably put myself to sleep I think I would rather read an 6,000 page government study on the sex life of the common housefly. It would probably be more interesting. |
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28 Nov 01 - 10:10 PM (#599866) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: GUEST Please save others the misery dont publish |
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28 Nov 01 - 10:40 PM (#599876) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: catspaw49 Ah Guest, you're just a pain in the ass who's pained they can't pull up their posts because there are so damn many Guest postings and you'd have to separate the pain in the ass ones! But speaking of a pain in the ass......... Paw's flatulence when combined with his passion for 'shine and hot wings used to be a big problem for him whenever his roids would flare up....so to speak...and it got to the point that little rubber donut pillows and Preparation H just weren't doing the job anymore. Now that's a real pain in the ass! Clete's 6th wife was into all the weird and wacky cures so Cletus was always coming to Paw with his suggestions that he'd heard from her. When Cletus told Paw about acupuncture, he disappeared for about two weeks and I'll be damned if anyone could find him. The Reg Boys too had their share of wacky cures for everything from the Great White North of Canada, but most of them involved bear grease and other vile and foamy liquids. Then it happened. The whole lot of them were watching my TV down in the den one night and had been subjected to at least nine hours of infomercials while they slugged down Iron City. I had learned from experience to unplug the phone and hide my credit cards on these nights which only took place when Karen was gone. I'm still paying for that quonset hut in the Aleutian Islands and I have the complete collection of Pan Flute Favorites so I have learned, albeit slowly. I think the one that finally got me was the "Great Michigan Getaway Weekend" which they bought and gave to Karen and I for an anniversary present. It was a month before I found out that they had billed it to my Visa and when we went for "rest and relaxation" in beautiful Michigan, it turned out to be clapped out motel run by a Pakistani in downtown Flint, just across from a closed GM factory. I guess it was about 5:30 AM when Cletus woke me up and said they had the cure for Paw's hemorrhoids. This was more than I wanted or needed to know at 5:30 so after verifying that it wouldn't cost me anything, I said have at it and went back to sleep. When I woke up about 7 I had one of those vague feelings of dread. You know what I mean? Nothing was wrong that I could think of and yet I just felt the world was going to come after me that day. It turned out to be Old Man Rafferty instead....but I'll come to that. The "boys" arrived back at my place about noon having already left when I woke at 7. They were lugging some huge electric motors into my garage and looking about for tools when I walked in and asked what the hell was going on. Cletus then launched into their "cure" and the reasoning behind it. It seems they had watched an infomercial about the "healing power of magnetism" and saw immediately that this was the way to fix Paw's 'roids. Slowly it all began to come together for me and I began to wonder how in the hell these guys could even remember how to breathe! In any case, they'd picked up the motors from out back of Bernie's Electrical Supply and were now going to remove the large magnets inside. They idea was to cut a slit in Paw's rubber donut, insert the magnets, and then duct tape the thing back together. I noticed that Buford had an old jockstrap (with cup) that they evidently were going to use to strap the magnets to Paw's ass, again using liberal amounts of duct tape. Listening to Cletus explain all of this and their newfound theory made me begin to question my own existence, as though I really didn't exist in the world I had come to know, but was simply a bit player in a leftover Rod Serling story. Things started going downhill pretty quickly as the magnets were removed and now were flying across my garage, affixing themselves to various steel things....like my van, my lawnmower, my golf clubs, and a little steel reinforced concrete rabbit that someone had once given us as a joke. I figured that I was going to be better off if they'd finish up somewhere else so I suggested they take all the stuff and head for the pleasant little roadside picnic area on the edge of the village where they could finish rigging Paw up and with any luck, I'd never know anything more about it. After removing the magnets, scratching the hell out of my van, breaking off the head of a 5 iron and the left ear of the rabbit, they left. The picnic area was only about a half mile off, just a bit down Rt.664 and I told them to let me know how it all worked out. Curiosity is a terrible thing sometimes and about an hour later I grabbed my Weimaraner and his leash and set out as though I were just walking the dog. As I turned on 664 I saw the Boys all walking towards me from the little picnic grove. Paw's ass seemed to be a bit large and he was walking funny, but from a distance I could tell they must have done a good job circling his ass in magnets because outside of a slight limp and a big bulge at the rear of his bibs, Paw looked pretty normal. Then it happened. Trailing the others, Paw walked past Old Man Rafferty's mailbox, a new heavy duty steel one to foil the kids with cars and bats. He first slowed, stopped, then flew backwards and before you could say "dumbfuck" he was hanging from his ass on the mailbox. Ol' Man Rafferty was washing his aging Electra deuce and a quarter and looked up to see what was happening. By that time, Cletus, Buford, and the Reg Boys all were tugging on either Paw or Rafferty's mailbox and though they got him off the mailbox was smashed in and the pole was a goner. Well I tell you, Rafferty came flying down the drive, gravel spitting up from his shoes, and swearing a blue streak. Paw was laying about 10 foot up the drive where he'd landed after the force of being ripped from the mailbox sent him sailing through the air. Rafferty bent over him and started yelling in his face and Paw was trying to stand up but being weighed down by the Magnetic Ass-Healing Ring. I got up there and tried to get Rafferty to calm down some as the others stood around looking bewildered. Rafferty started blaming me for allowing such "dumbass shitkickers" to stay here and how I should let them rot somewhere else. Before he could say another word, things continued to deteriorate. Paw had gotten to his feet about 15 feet from the Buick and there was a loud clanging thump as one of the hubcaps flew off and affixed itself to Paw's rump. Rafferty grabbed the hubcap and started pulling for all he was worth swinging Paw round and round in a circle. The hubcap folded and broke loose and Paw landed by the side of the road while Rafferty began to rage about his rump-sprung hubcap and twisted mailbox. I got out my checkbook and with a stern look to Cletus asked how much this would cost to keep from calling the police. The sight of my checkbook calmed Rafferty down and my Weimaraner had gone over to the side of the road and was licking Paw's face. Rafferty calculated a sum which I figured was enough to buy a new set of tires and an exhaust system for the Buick and build a brick mailbox, while forcing me nearer to bankruptcy. Cletus and the rest were circled around me as I handed Rafferty the check and when I turned to go, I saw Paw had gotten to his feet again and was bent over stroking Jaeger's head. The dog has always had a soft spot for Paw and when I whistled for him he reluctantly came back up the drive. Bending over to pick up his leash, I heard Cletus say, "Aw Sheeitt!" Right then I couldn't imagine how things could get worse, but I looked up just in time to see Paw lifted from his feet and his ass attach to the exhaust stack of a passing Peterbilt. I watched as the truck roared off, Paw flailing around and in a blind spot where the driver couldn't see him, and the dumbass Reg boys waving "bye-bye" as the Pete rounded a curve down by the Hopewell place. We found Paw at the truckstop at Rt.37 and I-70 where the driver had stopped for fuel. When we arrived, the Magnetic Ass-Healing Ring was nowhere to be seen and Paw was sitting on a bag of ice trying to cool the burns from riding 27 miles on an exhaust stack. But I tell you what.....Perhaps it was the scar tissue from the burns that did it, but Paw hasn't had trouble with 'roids since then. Maybe there is something to the power of magnetism.....................Why not give it a try Guest? Spaw
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28 Nov 01 - 10:52 PM (#599884) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Murray MacLeod Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! Murray |
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28 Nov 01 - 10:59 PM (#599888) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: catspaw49 And I'll probably post that on at least two more threads so watch out Murray! Spaw |
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28 Nov 01 - 11:20 PM (#599905) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: rangeroger Spaw,Didn't I just read that over at Tweed's? I've been corresponding by e-mail with another Mudcatter, and when several questions arose about my past life,I told her how to access my posting history. Most questions she had wanted to ask would be answered in those posts as I have told quite a bit about my life in them. Gave it to her as a school assingnment.Surprisingly she came back in 24 hours with a fairly detailed synopssis of me. Of course as a prize for successful completion of the assignment, I owe her a tape of me singing and playing. rr |
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28 Nov 01 - 11:51 PM (#599921) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Murray MacLeod Rangeroger, the question is, can she forecast whether you will be able to get a job in BRITAIN as an electrician ? Murray of Total Recall |
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29 Nov 01 - 12:01 AM (#599932) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: catspaw49 Tell ya' what you do double r.......Have her research all of my postings and see what she comes up with. I figure some are short, some are long, so for an average, let's say 100 words. This post is number 14,999 so that means about a One and a Half Million words, give or take a few thousand.....The prize is a new pair of reading glasses. Whaddaya' think? And yeah, it's a Tweed's Place too. When I write one of those things, I need to get some mileage out of it.............. Spaw |
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29 Nov 01 - 01:18 AM (#599986) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: rangeroger Murray, I'm ready for 230V/50hz loop circuits.In fact, since I've only worked 3 weeks out of the last 3 months, I'll take a job anywhere.And it would be nice to see England again. rr |
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29 Nov 01 - 07:30 AM (#600090) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: Banjer 'Spaw, I can't believe you had the extreme patience to go through all that story just to tell Guest to go pound a magnet up his ass! Very interesting story, and although my house has no stairs, I'll go somewhere that has stairs. Does the escalator at the mall count? |
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29 Nov 01 - 07:59 AM (#600092) Subject: RE: BS: Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs! From: catspaw49 Banj, how about Raymond James Stadium? Do they have stairs? You could go over there on New Year's Day and root for Ohio State...... Spaw |