15 Jul 02 - 06:07 PM (#748517) Subject: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine OK, so it took me a while longer than a day to come up with this Challenge! (hehehe) . . . My PT really took a lot out of me; but, the good news is that I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, and I'm feeling much more hopeful about things. Enough of that, now. Let's get to the good stuff! Hope you all have your crayons sharpened and plenty of TP ready for this one -- I'm expecting great things from my darlin' Challenge!rs (as usual!). So, Go For It, Challenge!rs!!! -- Áine (who's tickled to pieces that she can touch her toes again!!)
'I See Your Future Growing Bigger And Bigger' (Hamburg, Germany) A German clairvoyant is reading his clients' futures by feeling their naked bottoms. |
16 Jul 02 - 12:57 AM (#748683) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Áine, welcome back! Glad to hear you are on the mend. Gotta give this one some thought. Don't wannna leap into the breach prematurely, y'know. But what makes folks think that being blind would keep a guy from getting "a thrill from the buttock reading?" Isn't the lack of one sense supposed to intensify the others? ;-) Anyway, Amos-- who is probably somewhere around Redding or the Bay Area by now -- will be delighted that you're back among the living. (See note at the Pacif. NW gathering thread.) |
16 Jul 02 - 04:18 AM (#748735) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Aidan Crossey A parody of "The German Clockwinder" – an oul' Dubliners' number. THE GERMAN CLAIRVOYANT A German clairvoyant to Dublin once came Herr Doktor Ulf Buck was the oul' German's name And as he was windin' his way down The Strand He grabbed my bumcheeks in his prescient hands Singing toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay Your future, he says, it is hard for to tell Unless your thick clothing you choose to dispel For you can't read a book till you turn the first page And unless you are stripped, then your life I can't gauge Singing toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay Don't fear for your honour, for I cannot see I lost my sight at the young age of three No ulterior motive, no lechy intent I am a most noble, dispassionate gent Singing toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay So into my lodgings, face down on my bed My fine nether garments before him I shed He poked and he prodded, he fumbled and felt And me lyin' there in my natural pelt Singing toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay I see in your future a row with your man A laddy as muscled as Desperate Dan And heavens above, the oul' future's not bright For Herr Doktor Buck who has no gift of sight Singing toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay And with that the door opened, and filling the frame Stood my darling husband, Hugh Divney by name With an oath and a curse he lit on Doktor Buck And through the room window the Doktor he chucked Singing toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay Ah, wife Maryanne, ah, wife Maryanne Why did you take in such an innocent man? To fondle your arse and leave me on the shelf? If your fortune needs telling, sure I'll tell it meself Singing toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lumma-lumma Toora-lye-ay Toora-lye-oora-lye-oora-lye-ay
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16 Jul 02 - 06:54 AM (#748770) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Aidan Crossey A skit on "The Cobbler's Daughter" as sung by Kate Rusby. THE FARMER'S DAUGHTER I am a farmer's daughter and me arse is four-feet wide Much fame attaches to my name on account of my backside It's at the village pump They gossip 'bout my rump The most splendid rear that you have ever seen I am a farmer's daughter, I'm broad around the hips Some men aspire, and some admire, my praise is on their lips But jealous of my size Some women folk surmise That I'd be more attractive if more lean It's at the travelling circus, I met the German seer The seer said the future's read from fondling the rear He doesn't study palms Instead he studies hams From whose topography the future can be gleaned Bend over dear he says to me and let me have a feel For in the braille of your fair tail, the future is revealed As his digits he applied From shock he nearly died From information overload, it seems Here he found the future and there he found the past The now and ever shall be in the contours of my ass You are a unique case A walking database From now on my life's work your bum shall be You're the oracle of Delphi, with pleasure then, he squealed The more I mooned, he nearly swooned, as more knowledge I revealed Each dimple and each crease Each mole on my tailpiece Some light upon the future shed a beam Oh wed me said the seer and be my darling wife And I shall live in ecstasy as long as I have life Beside you in the bed No man better-read Nimble-fingered on your arse I'll be The farmer's daughter's husband knows all there is to know The answer to all questions is in my down-below My buttocks are a wonder Which nightly he does plunder No couple live more happily than we
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16 Jul 02 - 09:30 AM (#748838) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: MMario HAUL AWAY ULF!
When I was a little lad, or so Ulf Buck he told me |
16 Jul 02 - 11:27 AM (#748903) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: DonD To the melody of 'Anacreon in Heaven"
Oh, say can you see? |
16 Jul 02 - 11:43 AM (#748923) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: MMario Incredible, Don! |
16 Jul 02 - 12:23 PM (#748952) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Well, for starters: By The Size Of Your Flabby Old Moon words by Genie; tune: obvious By the size A honeymoon and
If I could read your tail, love, (to be continued) |
16 Jul 02 - 12:24 PM (#748955) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: wysiwyg How do you think I got to be the kinda girl that knows it ALL? ~S~ |
16 Jul 02 - 01:28 PM (#749010) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie If You Could Read Behinds, Doc New words by Genie; tune: by Gordon Lightfoot If you could read behinds, Doc, what a tale my tail would tell, And if I show you mine, Doc, what a tale its warts could tell, I stand there bare like a porno star who gets groped in a three-way script. If you could "read behinds," Doc, what a bill of goods you'd sell, apostrophes inserted and 'a' added by mudelf ;-) |
16 Jul 02 - 01:33 PM (#749016) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: MMario BRAVA! - but Genie - why are your post lately having all sorts of strange characters in them (versus the strange charactors you are speaking to..) |
16 Jul 02 - 01:59 PM (#749036) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie MMario, I think you are referring to some occasions recently when I have composed the post using Netscape Composer and then cut and pasted it into the Mudcat thread. If you do your composition in Composer, as Amos taught me, and then go to "Source View" and cut ONLY the text and paste that into the thread, all your formatting is preserved. BUT--as I have learned the hard way--if you have included some of your own typed-in HTML code within your text it will show up in the post as if it were text, but slightly altered. So if I want to do a blue clicky and want to use Composer, I put in the HTML code as usual, but after I paste the post into the thread--before I Submit it--I need to fix (retype) a couple of things in the HTML code that got changed in the cut and paste. If that's too complicated to be palatable, all you need to know is that it's a software thing and I know how to avoid it--provided I'm paying attention when I'm cutting, pasting, and posting. Genie On the other hand, if you're talking about this: §;- ) that's a self-portrait emoticon. |
16 Jul 02 - 02:10 PM (#749042) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Now I notice that there are some "+" signs scattered thru my epic poem. A few days ago, the same thing happened, but with question marks. Now THAT is a mystery to me. And, Mudself, when I look at my lyrics pre-post--the ones I cut and pasted--, all the apostrophes are there, just as it shows up here in the thread. Were they missing from the post? I DID leave out the word "a" in the first line of the last verse ("...what a bill of goods you'd sell...). Anyway, folks, computer gremlins do exist. I'm sure of it. Genie |
16 Jul 02 - 02:17 PM (#749047) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: MMario they had mutated Genie. They weren't apostrophes no more. |
16 Jul 02 - 02:20 PM (#749048) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Weird. Gotta be the gremlins. |
16 Jul 02 - 02:42 PM (#749068) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: mousethief How about a folk rap? Baby Got Tracks
I read your butts and I cannot lie I can't do any more. Sorry. Alex |
16 Jul 02 - 02:54 PM (#749073) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Deda It's a delight to have Aine back! So glad you're feeling better. I'm at work so I'll have to sneak back later, if I have any luck. Oh boy, song challenge is back, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.... |
16 Jul 02 - 02:55 PM (#749074) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Very appropriate, Alex--a butt-groping song that needs to be done with a scratcher! LOL!
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16 Jul 02 - 03:07 PM (#749088) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: mousethief Put Your Buns in the Hand
(Chorus – repeat after each verse)
My mama told me how to tell the future reading palms and tea leaves (repeat chorus)
Every time I wanna know what the future holds I go to Hamburg (repeat chorus interminably, and fade) Copyright ©2002 Alex E Riggle. All Rights Reserved. |
16 Jul 02 - 03:25 PM (#749105) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Well, Alex, you beat me to that song (I was thinking along the lines of "Put Your Can In The Hand Of The Man Who Feels Your Future"), but you done the song proud! Genie
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16 Jul 02 - 03:34 PM (#749111) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: MMario you people are all |
16 Jul 02 - 03:39 PM (#749114) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: mousethief Tush (think ZZ Top)
I been blind -- a long time
I can tell -- what's to come
So just take -- off your pants Copyright ©2002 Alex E Riggle. All Rights Reserved. (my but this is a hard one to put down. I mean, um...) |
16 Jul 02 - 03:47 PM (#749118) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: mousethief Okay, I read everybody else's songs finally (I didn't want to be "influenced" -- silly, I know). Great stuff, everybody! Genie, you're a wizard, as always. Derrymacash, simply awe-inspiring! "Information overload," indeed! Mmario and DonD, very nice also! I'm simply delighted the song challenge! is back. :) Alex |
16 Jul 02 - 03:49 PM (#749125) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: MMario You must be coming at it from the wrong direction Alex.
oh my - did I actually type that? |
16 Jul 02 - 04:00 PM (#749135) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Well, somebody's gotta do that classic Beatles song: "I Wanna Feel Your Can." This would also be a good time for a parody of the Danny Boy parody "London Derriere." "Hamburg Derriere," maybe? |
16 Jul 02 - 04:13 PM (#749152) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: MMario HAMBURG/DERRY-AIRE
"Oh Heinrich lad, your fate, your fate is calling
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16 Jul 02 - 04:22 PM (#749163) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: GUEST,Sonja LOL, MMario! |
16 Jul 02 - 04:32 PM (#749173) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: McGrath of Harlow I've got a little behind with me work, I've been slaving away like a Turk, When I fondle each bum I find what is to come, Just a little behind with me work.
A little behind, I'll confess
A little behind, or perhaps
A little behind or a lot, |
16 Jul 02 - 04:45 PM (#749181) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: SharonA I took my two buns down to Meister Ulf You know, that German with the guide-dog wolf. He's got a fad now; I heard he paws behinds... More later! |
16 Jul 02 - 05:08 PM (#749212) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine Well dang, y'all! And here I was worried when nobody had 'answered the call' for a few hours yesterday . . . but, my faith has been restored!! I knew you'd like this one ;-) So, without further ah-doo, here are your B.L.O.B.s -- -- Áine
To derrymacash for:
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16 Jul 02 - 06:33 PM (#749265) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: mousethief The Old Prognosticator (tune: The Old Settler/Acres of Clams)
I've traveled all over this planet
First I thought he was some kind of pervert
So I went down to Hamburg to meet him
Then she led me into a small chamber
I was nervous as you can imagine
Well I left in a huff, let me tell you
And then would you believe in a fortnight Copyright ©2002 Alex E Riggle. All Rights Reserved. |
16 Jul 02 - 06:51 PM (#749283) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: GUEST,Sonja Feeling Your Bum Again Lyrics: Sonja W. Oates ©2002; parody of Falling In Love Again Feeling your bum again, Clairvoyance is my game, Some say that folks wear their hearts upon their sleeves, Feeling your bum again, Falling In Love Again - (sung by Marlene Dietrich) Falling in love again, Love's always been my game, Men cluster to me like moths around a flame, Falling in love again, ~SWO~ |
16 Jul 02 - 08:09 PM (#749339) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: SINSULL And where exactly is my lifeline????? |
16 Jul 02 - 08:42 PM (#749359) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Amos Just aft of the heart line, I believe! :>) A |
16 Jul 02 - 10:04 PM (#749402) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: GUEST,Sonja Dunno, Sins, I guess ya have to ask Dr. Ulf. ;-) |
16 Jul 02 - 10:23 PM (#749408) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine The Bare Bums Of Meldorf (Tune: The Streets Of Laredo) As I herded my sheep down the streets of old Meldorf, I spied a small sign, 'Buck Reads Bare Bums,' it said, My red, trail-worn cheeks, they parted in laughter, A bright idea shooting straight up to my head. For years I'd been dealing with the Miser of Mencken, A burg just a few twists and turns down the road, And tired of his cheatin' and beatin' my price down, I thought of a way to drain his motherlode. The dogs heard my whistle, and going to work, They halted the flock just outside the Bucks' door, With a ewe in each arm, I bravely strode forward, And soon we were standing on the living room floor. I have to say here, that old Ulf is a nice man, With smooth and warm hands, and a beautiful wife, Though laughed at by some, his fervant endeavour, Is to help all his clients lead a well and full life. In the space of an hour, three bums bared and well read, Myself and my flock, we were back on the trail, And as we traversed up the mountain to Mencken, I tried to ponder my fate, but to no avail. No more did that miser cheat me out of money, That Ulf Buck of Meldorf, he changed my whole life, Of all of the futures he's read, mine's the strangest, For now I am rich with a be-ewe-ti-ful wife! (insert sheepish grin here . . .) |
17 Jul 02 - 12:12 AM (#749446) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine Oooooh, more B.L.O.B. candidates!! Here ya go, then: To mousethief for: I was nervous as you can imagine T'have this stranger touch my derriere Then he said, "Ach mein Lieber! It's yoost like The hair on the back of a bear!" And to Sonja for: Feeling your bum again, Nothing vile or rude-- Hey, I'm a doctor, dude, It's my calling! Bravo and Brava, respectively!! -- Áine |
17 Jul 02 - 12:34 AM (#749451) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Áine, thanks for the B.L.O.B. But (no pun intended), that song of yours was ba-a-a-a-a-a-a-ad! ¤;-D |
17 Jul 02 - 01:05 AM (#749458) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Amos A SIlver BLOB to the Goddess !! A |
17 Jul 02 - 08:24 AM (#749598) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: SharonA Ha ha ha ha!! These songs are great!!! Bravo, everyone. Awrightee, here's the one I started yesterday... A FORTUNE FROM BEHIND (Tune: "Love Potion Number Nine" by Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller) Pronunciation Guide: Ideally, "fortune" should be pronounced "FO-chun" ;^) I took my two buns down to Meister Ulf – You know, that German with the guide-dog wolf – He's got a fad, now; I heard he paws 'em blind, Tellin' kids his fondles tell A fortune from behind. I told him that I was a cop. His fix Of skin's against the law, so nix his tricks! I wrote out a ticket and said, "Just read this!" "Nein," He said, "All I read is A fortune from behind. "So bend down and turn around and don't be a fink," He said, "I'm gonna feel you up. Your future is pink! You'll get a third of what I make. I'll give you a mink..." I held his wrist. I cuffed his ass. He's in the clink! He'll never go out in the daytime light. I doubt he's missing Meldorf's bums tonight 'Cause when he pissed this cop off who'd heard he paws 'em blind, The pokey's where I thought he'll have A fortune from behind A fortune from behind A fortune from be-hi-yi-yi-yi-yinnnnd! |
17 Jul 02 - 08:39 AM (#749607) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Amos WOW!, A |
17 Jul 02 - 02:05 PM (#749772) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie LMAO, Sharon! Genie |
17 Jul 02 - 03:57 PM (#749846) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Amos As the official Depiddy Dawg I decree a A Blob Argent with Guiness Rampant for the GG's own talent:
For years I'd been dealing with the Miser of Mencken And for the brazen effrontery of following through on ewe-know-what!!! A |
17 Jul 02 - 05:46 PM (#749921) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine Ah shoot, SharonA, you had to go and use one of my best belov-ed golden oldie tunes for your parody -- fantastic! . . . Looks like you'll have to make room on your virtual mantel for a Silver B.L.O.B. for: "So bend down and turn around and don't be a fink," He said, "I'm gonna feel you up. Your future is pink! You'll get a third of what I make. I'll give you a mink..." I held his wrist. I cuffed his ass. He's in the clink! Whoo-whee -- purty darn fine there, girlfriend! ;-) And a big snug and hog to Amos for my most honorable mention, too. ;-) -- Áine |
17 Jul 02 - 08:08 PM (#750019) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Áine, girl, whazzup wid yer 'pewter? Ya keeps turnin' into Áine. Howz come? ©Ž–'' |
17 Jul 02 - 09:10 PM (#750061) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine 'Cuz that's my name . . . I think you've done something to your html mapping somewhere. On my computer, when you type my name, the first letter is a 'c' with a squiggle underneath it. I think that the Mudelf is changing it into 'normal' html . . . ;-) -- Áine |
17 Jul 02 - 09:39 PM (#750078) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Amos çedilla? I thought ya had to go around and do the A-acute-ampersand-semicolon-ine to get anywhere with ya!! :>) A |
17 Jul 02 - 10:14 PM (#750089) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine Uh, Brother Amos, on my 'puter, you gotta do a 'ampersand - A - acute - semicolon -ine' to get Áine . . . leastways, that's the way I've been doing it around here for 4 years or so . . . ;-) -- TGG (a/k/a She Who Shall Be Acuted One Day) |
17 Jul 02 - 11:14 PM (#750103) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: MMario TGG pretty much a cutie already seems to me. |
17 Jul 02 - 11:43 PM (#750117) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Deda Whoops -- the line breaks didn't copy. Sorry. Here it is with them inserted:
He didn't have to read my palms ,
I went to Hamburg one fine day
He said the sun would shine for me from this day forth,
He didn't have to read my palm
He said good friends and wealth would come to me real soon,
His prices seemed a little high
He said I'd marry me a millionaire duplicate post deleted by mudelf ;-) |
17 Jul 02 - 11:51 PM (#750125) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Amos LOL, Sis!! Somone go get the harmonica player!! Great stufff!! A |
18 Jul 02 - 12:35 AM (#750136) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine Here ya go, Deda my darlin', your B.L.O.B. for: He said the time was right for me to find true love, He saw alignment of the stars above, through his glove --- -- Áine
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18 Jul 02 - 01:40 AM (#750154) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: GUEST,Sonja Scanned By Your Hands Parody of Stand By Your Man by Tammy Wynette and Billy Sherrill New lyrics by Sonja W. Oates Sometimes its hard to be uncertain, "Butts tell the future," Dr. Buck says, CHORUS Some seers read the cards or tea leaves; Butt reading probes tomorrow's borders, CHORUS |
18 Jul 02 - 09:24 AM (#750354) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: SharonA "scanned by your hands" – groannnn – "Doing things that Boston law has banned" – hee hee hee!!! Sonja, this is like being tickled till ya can't breathe... let me up for air, then I'll read it again! Hoo hoo ha ha ha... |
18 Jul 02 - 10:41 AM (#750413) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Amos LOL, Sonja -- it's a keeper!! Liberace to my baby grand, indeed!! LOL! A |
18 Jul 02 - 01:29 PM (#750547) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: GUEST,Sonja Thanks! Now I'm waiting for someone to do those great hits from the Rock Opera "Tommy," "Touch Me, Feel Me, Channel Me" and "Butt-cheek Wizard." (It'll have to be someone else, since I don't know the original songs very well.) |
18 Jul 02 - 04:42 PM (#750653) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: GUEST,Sonja I See Your Future, Now I've Read Your Bum Parody lyrics by Sonja W. Oates © 2002 I see your future, now I've read your bum. I think I can feel it, now your pants are gone-- Dr. Ulf Yes, I can see clearly now I've read your bum. SWO BTW, Amos, glad you liked the "Liberace" line and the Tammy Wynette parody. ;-) |
18 Jul 02 - 05:21 PM (#750671) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Now that I've allowed myself to read the earlier submissions (which I try not to do until I've worked my own for a while), let me say there are, as usual, some real gems there! Aidan, you do know how to spin a yarn with a wry twist, don't you! Nothin' like a couple of sweet love stories! MMario, what a chantey! Don, John Ashcroft is gonna have th' ol' FBI start a file on you for desecrating our national anthem (if you're a Yank, that is). Great limerick, McGrath! Alex, "Acres Of Hair?" (Groannnn...) I don't know how I missed that gem of yours! Good job, Deda! LM(unread)AO!, all you folks! Genie |
19 Jul 02 - 08:44 AM (#751007) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: SharonA (I've got another one in the works; hopefully I can wrap it up tonight and post it tomorrow. Here's a hint to the melody: it's Christmas in July...) |
20 Jul 02 - 05:20 AM (#751516) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Amos, you gonna let your sis outdo you on this one? Surely you've got a few choice lines in the can for this one, don't you? |
20 Jul 02 - 01:41 PM (#751650) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine Here's a couple of B.L.O.B.s to the fantastic Sonja -- well done, girlfried! -- for: Some seers read the cards or tea leaves; You read the lines where I'm not tanned. So, do your duty-- Tickle my booty, Liberace to my 'baby grand.' And for a 'can-do' attitude in: Yes, I can see clearly now I've read your bum. A can-deciph'ring oracle, that's my way. Don't be embarrassed, Liebschen--I am blind. Gotta read your tight, (tight), tight (tight) young heine, eh? Way to go, Challenge!rs!! -- Áine |
20 Jul 02 - 02:44 PM (#751665) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Amos Nah -- this one's too close to home for my talents, Genie! :>) I've been the butt of too many jokes to let my feelings show!! :>) Deda carries the torch pour la famille. She's got the profundity required for this kind of work! She's better cut out for it than I am!! A |
20 Jul 02 - 04:23 PM (#751706) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Deda Well, I'm much more generously endowed above, in terms of size, than behind -- and rounder than Amos in general -- but that never seems to hinder his worshipful songs in praise of the golden globes, hymns to the overflowing cups. I'm at a loss to explain his non-entry. I thought it might be time pressures, since he's just back from the NW Pacific gig, but he can whip out song lyrics faster than I can burn toast. 'Tis puzzlement. |
20 Jul 02 - 06:51 PM (#751758) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine Well, my darlin' Challenge!rs -- it appears that we have punched, pulled and prodded (ouch!) all the entries from this Challenge! that are possible in this moment of 'Cat space . . . So, with cudos, congrats and a tip of my hat to each of you, here are your Chips -- Enjoy!! -- Áine
Winners of the Golden Cow Chip with Shamrock Cluster (The Shamrock Cluster is awarded for a very high level of imagination, imagery, and/or creative use of language in a song): |
20 Jul 02 - 10:14 PM (#751843) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Whoa, there, gal! Awright, fo'ks, dontch think TGG deserves a great big Golden Cow Chip with Doo-Lyn Ditty Digger Decoration for "The Bare Bums of Meldorf?" Whaddya say, kids?
Genie §:-D |
22 Jul 02 - 08:46 AM (#752336) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: SharonA I agree, Genie, but I suppose our modest GG won't give it to herself. Ya think we can collectively convince her to take it, just this once? Anyway, thanks so much for the Harp-Chip, Áine! I wasn't able to punch, pull and prod the following song in time to be "in the moment" (or, at least, in time to go to the library on Saturday and submit the song!), but here 'tis, a little bit late, a Christmas song in July. My biggest dilemma with this parody was finding a word that sounded vaguely like "shepherd boy"....*G* DO YOU SEE WHAT I'LL BE? (Tune: "Do You Hear What I Hear?" – the Christmas classic – word and music by: Gloria Shayne Baker/ Noel Regney) Said the white skin to the twiddlin' hand, "Do you see what I'll be? 'Way above my thigh, twiddlin' hand, Do you see what I'll be? So far, you are prancing with delight. Is your braille-ass gig second sight? Will some male ass dig mine tonight?" Said the twiddlin' hand to the hemorrhoid, "Do you fear when I'm near, Stinging when I'm nigh, hemorrhoid? Do you fear when I'm near? What's wrong? A thong, high above the knees! It annoys your big ass, I see. It annoys your big ass, and me." Said the hemorrhoid, "Do your sightless thing, Do, and know what eyes know With your callus firm, sightless thing. Do, and know where I'll go." The guileless pile quivered where the bold, Seeking fingers its fate foretold, Where the fingers its fate foretold. Said the fingers, "O dimpled derriere, Kissin' someone's ass may Pay our fees, dimpled derriere. Kissin' your white ass? Nay, Not while the pile peeping from your tight Butt will bring no good sex. That's right, I predict no good sex tonight!" (Big finish, with chorus) "Not tooo - niiiiiiiiiiiight!" |
22 Jul 02 - 10:04 AM (#752370) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Well worth the wait, Sharon. "The guileless pile quivered where the bold,..." Got a good belly laugh outa that one! Genie |
19 Aug 02 - 09:46 AM (#767895) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Wolfgang May I add that among skeptics what Mr. Buck offers is called asstrology. Wolfgang |
19 Aug 02 - 03:27 PM (#768080) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Genie Grrroannnnn, Wolfgang! ¤;-) |
22 Aug 02 - 02:02 AM (#769473) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: GUEST,Sonja I think Sharon deserves a Cow Chip (kinda appropriate for this Song Challenge!, don't you think?) for that last masterpiece. Right, Aine? |
22 Aug 02 - 06:07 PM (#769840) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: Áine You are absolutely bloomin' right, there, Sonja!!! Not only is SharonA awarded a chip, but also a Golden TGG 'Good On Ya'!! for a better late than never (and it's never too late for a Challenge! Song) entry: Here ya go, SharonA, cudos and muchas gracias for this gem: Winner Of The Golden Cow Chip Award With Memorial MMario Silverplated Spittoon (The GCCWMMSPS is awarded to the Challenge! entry which evokes an instantaneous bubbling up of frothy mirth from out of the lips of the Keeper of the Book and onto her monitor screen): Do You See What I'll Be? by SharonA Yee-Haw!! -- Áine |
23 Aug 02 - 10:07 AM (#770151) Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 85 From: SharonA Oooh! A "Good on Ya" from our good Áine! And a Cow Chip Award with a silverplated spittoon, too – WOW! Thank you!!! (That does it; I'm gonna have to get a virtual display case for these thangs – I'm out of room on the virtual mantel!) |