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Dear Grandpa: personal romance advice

08 Nov 02 - 10:48 AM (#821464)
Subject: Dear Grandpa: personal romance advice
From: wilco

Under the pseudonym Grandpappy Whodoo, I write a "personals' column" for a local musicians' newsletter. Please give me your take on this fellow's problem. Here is the latest letter to me.

Dear Grandpappy:
    I am having a problem in my marriage with my wife of twenty years.
    The other night, I was playing a borrowed open-backed banjo, and I told my wife that I sure wanted one. She was in the other room, where she usually goes when I play my banjo or fiddle, and I had to kind of holler. She was watching some romantic pap on the TV.
    Then she came in, said she was going up to bed, and that I should come up in a few minutes, after her bath, for a surprise. i forgot all about it, because I was trying to learn the double thumb frail on the borrowed banjo. She got a little peeved.
    At any rate, she got mad, and told me to come upstairs and get in bed while she was in the bathroom. I obliged.
    Directly, she came out in a real fancy pajama top, with little red ribbon bows on the top. She kind of scooched across the room, and said, "I got you a little surprise." Then she undid one of them bows, and the jammys fell on one shouldr, and she pulled out a bottle of wine. Then she said, "And, here's another surprise." And, she undid another bow, and the jammys fell on down a little more, and she pulled out two glasses. So we poured a little wine.
    Then, she grabbed the last bow, and she said, "Now, I got you a real surprize, big boy. Something you reeeeeaallly want" I got so excited. I hollered, "Hot dam, you got me an open-backed banjo in there."
   She got very mad. What did I do wrong?
Signed: Sleeping in the car in Detroit (with my old banjo)

My reply:

Dear sleeping in the car in Detroit.
    Grandpappy Whodoo knows all about women, since my mom was once one, as were all of my wives. Unless the Mrs. is a very large woman, she obviously couldn't have had a banjo in her pajama top. You need to be more sensitive and think. You should have guessed that it was a harmonica. Or maybe a jaw harp. Something smaller. Go buy her a harmonica, or some other small insturment, and everything will work out.

Signed: Grandpappy Whodoo.


Do you mudcatters have a better "take" on this situation?


08 Nov 02 - 11:08 AM (#821477)
Subject: RE: Dear Grandpa: personal romance advice
From: Wesley S

I always thought that women prefered mandolins.


08 Nov 02 - 11:12 AM (#821481)
Subject: RE: Dear Grandpa: personal romance advice
From: katlaughing

Should have told him to ask to toot on her hooters and all would be well!**BG**


08 Nov 02 - 11:20 AM (#821491)
Subject: RE: Dear Grandpa: personal romance advice
From: CarolC

The woman is clearly hinting around that she wants an accordion with which to accompany Mr. SitciD (wmob)'s open backed banjo playing. I don't know why this is so difficult for people to see.


08 Nov 02 - 11:22 AM (#821492)
Subject: RE: Dear Grandpa: personal romance advice
From: Willie-O

I bet she got you an ocarina, ya big oaf.

But due to your insensitive comment, she'll probably turn around and give it to someone who wants to play it!


08 Nov 02 - 11:23 AM (#821493)
Subject: RE: Dear Grandpa: personal romance advice
From: Louie Roy

When you play with a womans spark plug and her carburator starts leaking you better not have a flat or you'll get more than a banjo over your head


08 Nov 02 - 12:27 PM (#821559)
Subject: RE: Dear Grandpa: personal romance advice
From: Amos

Some people are SO insensitive!! The only thing she coulda been hiding under them ribbons was one of those intellitouch tuners!! Now, the poor sod doesn't have an intelli-touch worth talking about, and his life is all outta tune. Sheesh!!

A


08 Nov 02 - 10:19 PM (#821985)
Subject: RE: Dear Grandpa: personal romance advice
From: Hrothgar

She was actually more interested in a instrument you had already.


08 Nov 02 - 10:37 PM (#821994)
Subject: RE: Dear Grandpa: personal romance advice
From: katlaughing

Louie Roy! Priceless! I love it!!