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Lyr Req: Dudley vrsn of 'Matty Groves'

14 Nov 02 - 09:32 AM (#825778)
Subject: ... or 'Little Musgrave' ...
From: Steve Parkes

I think this has been mentioned in the past, but I couldn't find the thread. Never mind, I'll try asking. I'm looking for a parody of Matthy Groves/Little Musgrave/whatever by a Black Country (UK) singer now deceased, whose name (to my great shame) I can never remember. It started off:
It was Easter time in Dudley town, a time to sing and shout,
The folk all gathered in the Two Bulls' Yeds [Heads] to push the jug about.

In the corner sat a lot of young wenches ...

It tells how the gorgeous Molly, Albert Wilkins wife, chats up [name?] and takes him home. He wakes in the early hours, hearing Albert's motorbike; "Do' be saft," she tells him, "it's only next door's lavatory!" Only of course, it's Albert himself, who tell him to get up.
I wo' get up and I cor [can't] get up, and I shor [shan't] get up, Tosh,
'Cos yo've got two bike chains, and I ay [ain't] brought me cosh!
It's true I've got two bike chains, I got 'em off my mate,
But yo' can 'ave the 'alfinch, and I'll 'ave the three-eight!

And you know how it's going to end. Anyone know the words? And the author's name?

Steve

14 Nov 02 - 02:12 PM (#826062)
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dudley vrsn of 'Matty Groves'
From: GUEST,Bob Taberner

Steve,
A former resident of a club that I go to used to sing it, so I'll ask around. Drop me a line at Bob.Taberner@btinternet.com

14 Nov 02 - 07:11 PM (#826373)
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dudley vrsn of 'Matty Groves'
From: Frug

I remember this being sung around the clubs in the midlands, so if you do get the words please post them as I recall it was a very funny parody.

15 Nov 02 - 08:29 AM (#826789)
Subject: Lyr Add: THE BALLAD OF ANUCH SMITH
From: GUEST,Andy Casserley

Steve
I remember the writer of this parody, Jim Stevens, singing it at the Jug of Punch Folk Club in Birmingham in 1973.
He wrote it as a parody of the version that Lorna Campbell used to sing. The first time he performed, it was immediately after the original version. I sing it myself very rarely, only if someone has just sung Matty Groves.
Coincidentally I am performing at the Brewers Droop folk club on 21/11/02 and have already had a request to sing "The Ballad of Anuch Smith".
Here are the lyrics.
Enjoy

'Twas Easter time up Dudley town, a time to sing and shout.
The people all gathered in the Two Bulls' Yeds to push the jug about.

In the corner sat a lot of young wenches. they was on a spree.
On her own sat Molly Wilkins. as quiet as a mouse was she.

But when her'd had a couple of drinks, her started to look around.
Then her seen young Anuch Smith drinking old and brown.

"Come wum with me, young Anuch Smith. come wum with me," her said.
"Come wum with me to me council flat and we can go to bed."

"I won't come wum. I shor come wum. I won't come wum today,
Cos yo belong to Albert Wilkins and he's a right old tearaway."

"Yo'm right. I belong to Albert Wilkins, and he's a rotten sod.
He's gone to Cradley dog track and left me on me tod."

One of Albert's mates was by the door, a shifty little mon.
He says, "I'll goo and find Albert, let him know what's gooin on."

In his hurry to get to Albert, he belted down the street
And he jumped on a number 244 bus to get to Cradley Heath.

When he found Albert leaning on the bar,
He said, "Aynuch Smith's with your young Molly and I'm sure they'll goo to far."

"Now, if what yo'm teeling me is right, our kid, I'll mek it worth your while,
But if yo'm tellin a pack of lies I'll mark your bleedin dial."

So Albert pulled on his helmet and jumped on his motor bike
And belted back to Dudley to put this matter right.

Aynuch said, "Hear Albert's bike with the engine running free!"
"Lie down, you fool," says Molly. "It's only next door's lavatory.

So Aynuch Smith he lay down to rest his weary yed.
When he awoke, Albert Wilkins was standing by the bed.

Saying, "Get up, get up, Ayuch Smith, and get your trousers on,
Cos I won't have it said round Dudley Town that I bashed a naked mon."

"I won't get up and I shan't get up. I won't get up for yo tosh,
Cos you've got two long cycle chains and I ain't got me cosh.

"Yo'm right I got two cycle chains. I got them off me mate,
But yo can have the half-inch and I'll tek the three-eighths."

So Aynuck swung his half-inch chain, gave Albert such a jolt,
But Albert's helmet saved him. Aynuch had shot his bolt.

When Albert swung his chain, the blood begun to pour.
Aynuch Smith rolled on his back and he could tek no more.

Then he turns to Molly, "Come here, yo little squirt.
Who do yo love th best now? Anuch Smith or Bert?"

Then up spoke young Molly as her begun to weep:
"I'd rather have my Aynuch than yo, yo bloody creep."

This upset old Albert. It was more than he could tek,
So he took his great long cycle chain and wrapped it round her neck.

A police car was passing by. They heard young Molly squail.
The cops rushed into that council flat. Now Albert Wilkins he's in jail.

15 Nov 02 - 09:57 AM (#826862)
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dudley vrsn of 'Matty Groves'
From: Steve Parkes

Triffic, Andy! Just wait till I see Trish at Bedford FC!

Steve

27 Sep 15 - 07:30 AM (#3740088)
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dudley vrsn of 'Matty Groves'
From: GUEST,Dave Hunt (Dr Sunshine)

Does anyone have the words to the American?version that Steve Benbow sang? Ta!

27 Sep 15 - 09:25 AM (#3740105)
Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Dudley vrsn of 'Matty Groves'
From: Steve Gardham

Brilliant parody. Very witty, well composed. I can even imagine FJC having a giggle at that.