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18 Jun 03 - 12:24 PM (#968486) Subject: BS: missing millions From: GUEST,red and white rabbit No this is not about cash - nor is it for those of you with a delicate disposition OKay this is my confusion - it doesnt take much - a friend of mine has recently had a baby to a guy who had had a vasectomy - no it wasnt an accident and no he didnt have his knots untied he just had a needle inserted and the sperm removed through that but - and this is the question I want answering what happens to all the millions of sperm who sally forth and hit knots? Do they turn round and go back home? do they get recycled? Do they hang around on the street corner waiting to see if they will be released or if a number 38 bus will take them somewhere else instead? Is that really what constitues a male middle aged spread? What happens? I know I can rely on you lot for the answer. |
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18 Jun 03 - 12:28 PM (#968487) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: MMario They don't actually get to sally forth - the barricade is across the flat door! |
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18 Jun 03 - 12:48 PM (#968495) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Morticia they probably go down the pub and watch the footie....very nice local just near the small intestine, I believe. |
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18 Jun 03 - 02:00 PM (#968522) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Amos They die, decompose, their consituent elements are assimilated and recycled (excellent protein, those spermies). Well, you asked. But there are always more being generated behind the knot, assuming the testes are operational. A |
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18 Jun 03 - 03:06 PM (#968546) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Don Firth They sit around and sulk. Don Firth |
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18 Jun 03 - 03:34 PM (#968563) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: sian, west wales How does Amos know all this stuff? I'm not sure it's healthy ... sian |
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18 Jun 03 - 03:34 PM (#968564) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Ebbie Hardly anything new there- the chances of any one of them being THE one have always been slim to nonexistent, anyway. Kind of like winnng the lottery. |
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18 Jun 03 - 06:10 PM (#968641) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Sorcha JFK used to complain that if he didn't have sex once a day he had horrible headaches, so do vascetimized men have horrible headaches? I mean, the 'pressure' so to speak, is not being relieved........(uh oh, I'm in for it now.......) |
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18 Jun 03 - 07:00 PM (#968661) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Amos Sorcha: I dunno, darlin' but I would hazard the guess that the whole "suffering for want of release" thing is part of the adolescent manuvering catalogue dreamed up by young men trying desperately to persuade young women to surrender their donjon keeps. Never estimate male wiles when there's sex in the prospect-- including JFK's headaches. Well, he may have gotten headaches, but I would bet it had nothing to do with sperm buildup, I'm pretty sure, more likely some deepseated psychosomatic computation on his part. It is true that there is a great deal of desperation in the desires of youth but it is not, in fact, driven by physical pain -- more like a satyric appetite than anything else... A |
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18 Jun 03 - 07:05 PM (#968667) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: rangeroger The brings into focus the male counterpart to PMS,SRS. Sperm Retention Syndrome. Since men are often accused of thinking with their genitals, when the sperm get backed up they all flow to the brain causing the male to often exhibit extremely bizarre behavior. rr |
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18 Jun 03 - 07:58 PM (#968701) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: catspaw49 Spaw |
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18 Jun 03 - 08:54 PM (#968723) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Amos Ya know, this explains why everyone thinks they CAN win the lottery -- it worked once!! A |
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18 Jun 03 - 10:06 PM (#968744) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Doug_Remley The "release" is often a quantity of seminal fluid produced by the prostate, which acts as a wehicle for whatever sperm join it from a separate source, much like a paint mixture with or without "pigment." |
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18 Jun 03 - 11:49 PM (#968775) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Sorcha Thank you for the 'real' answers. The beating was much less than I expected it to be. (BIG GRIN) |
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19 Jun 03 - 12:22 AM (#968790) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Amos Beating? That's a far-fetched solution to the problem, really....at least that's what Spaw says and he's an expert... A |
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19 Jun 03 - 12:58 AM (#968802) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Sorcha AAARRRGGGHHH! I think I'll go to sleep now........maybe on the couch, NOT 'to bed'............... |
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19 Jun 03 - 02:41 AM (#968824) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: C-flat With regard to the issue of headaches and "sperm retention syndrome", I was vasectomised 5 years ago and have noticed no vas deferens! |
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19 Jun 03 - 04:44 AM (#968874) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: MC Fat I too have had the 'two bricks job' (does it hurt ? Only if your fingers are in the way !!) and I just have this mental vision at the given moment of all these lads going 'Wa hey ere we go' and then committing hari kari by bashing their heads against a wall. So the question is every time I have a shag am I committing murder (Mr Taggart theres bin a murrderr) on is it voluntary manslaughter ? |
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19 Jun 03 - 10:59 AM (#969041) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Stilly River Sage Good one, C-flat! RR, Please rework that name, "Sperm Retention Syndrome," the acronym is already in use (SRS). No sperm has been slammed against a wall or otherwise restrained on my account. I intercepted a couple of the buggers (with fantastic results!), but found divorce was a better solution than surgery to cease any output I would have to deal with. Gonad Congestion Syndrome would work. GCS SRS |
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19 Jun 03 - 12:38 PM (#969128) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: C-flat I endorse what MC Fat says about there being no pain during the procedure but nearly everyone I know who has had "the snip" had a problem later with infection. In my own case the swelling was quite dramatic (I wish I'd took polariod), "please can you take the pain away but leave the swelling?" The worst part was encountering a very young and attractive nurse who was helping during the operation by holding my terrified member out of harms way while the doc did his stuff! She was determined to make me at ease by chattering about the weather and what she was doing at the weekend while I desparately tried to ignore her and focus my mind on anything other than a pretty blonde smiling at me while holding my penis! Oh yes, there was also the humiliation of being offered a sanitary towel to wrap around my testicles! I bet that nurse has a few laughs with her friends in the pub after work. |
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19 Jun 03 - 01:49 PM (#969200) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: GUEST,red and white rabbit well thank you for the answer - I think!! McFat it depeds whether or not you had the intention to ejaculate or not - if you were being held by a beautiful nurse and couldnt help it then I think its involuntary manslaughter if however you were going for another yodel with the sound of music lass then I am afraid thats murder and warrants a 20 year stretch with no time off for good behaviour!! Let me get this right - if a man says he has a headache he is in need of sex - if a woman has a headache its because she doesnt want to be an accessory to murder!! By the way can it be murder if you cant find the bodies? |
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19 Jun 03 - 03:05 PM (#969246) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Amos Well, geeze, if you're gonna be ridiculous, maybe I should figure out a way to start copyrighting all my potential ideas so I could claim infringement by anything published? Hey, it's got letters in it, right? That proves its mine... Oh, my aching head!! :>) A |
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20 Jun 03 - 03:48 AM (#969524) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: GUEST,red and white rabbit name the time and the place Amos - I hate to see a man suffering!! |
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20 Jun 03 - 04:05 AM (#969534) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: GUEST,U. Screwitt II Dear Mr Fat I have to inform you that the police are now holding a murder investigation - you are the prime suspect and I am willing to represent you should you need legal advice. There will of course be a small fee for handling a case of mass murder- top of the road prices should cover it nicely - are there any other confessions you wish to make - do you wish other incidents to be taken into account? As you will appreciate handling such a case is a delicate matter. I have no wish to 'balls it up' but I understand there is the possibilty of a co- conspiritor being cited a one Master Bates - seaman first class from Grimsby - do you have any info you wish to hand on? |
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20 Jun 03 - 06:28 AM (#969587) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Allan C. Amos, you said, "It is true that there is a great deal of desperation in the desires of youth but it is not, in fact, driven by physical pain..." Clearly the expression, being "blue balled" means nothing to you. However, I am sure many a young man found himself in considerable discomfort after an evening that included lots of stimulation, (sometimes referred to as "prick teasing") without release. |
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20 Jun 03 - 06:39 AM (#969592) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: MC Fat or the young lad who was told by the priest to stop masterbating and save himself until he got married. A few months later the priest met him and asked if he was still saving himself. The young man replied he had 10 milk bottles full already !!! |
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20 Jun 03 - 08:55 AM (#969640) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Amos Allan: Plenty of discomfort, yes. Noithing a cold shower or a night's sleep wouldn't resolve. 'Course, who'd want to take a cold shower in that condition, and them all full of youthy zest? Not likely. But not real pain. A lot less painful, for example, than bein in extremis over a full bladder. A |
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21 Jun 03 - 04:08 AM (#970101) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Liz the Squeak It's OK Mr McFat, Habeus Corpus (or have his carcase) and all that - you can't be charged with murder if they have no body - only in connection with a disappearance. Of course, now that you have made a full confession on a public forum, we don't need a body and will be round yours as soon as we've uncrossed our legs. PC Flasher of the Yard. |
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21 Jun 03 - 12:58 PM (#970221) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: annamill I can't believe I'm reading a thread about lost sperm! And some of my favorite people are posting to it! This is such a crazy place. Love, Annamill |
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21 Jun 03 - 04:38 PM (#970291) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Amos ...and who will ever forget the deathless cry, Get back! Get back!!! It's a BLOW JOB!!!Regards, A |
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10 Aug 03 - 09:47 PM (#1000005) Subject: RE: BS: missing millions From: Joe Offer Think of it - a million!!! |