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02 Mar 04 - 08:01 AM (#1127566) Subject: Lyr Add: Do It Yourself Mainframe From: Eden Here's a song I know. It makes fun of mainframe computer companies: I went to buy a computer; they said a million bucks For a brand-new mainframe IBM. Now that price really sucks, So I looked at all the pictures, and I chose to build my own; For you can build a mainframe from the things you find at home. (chorus) Oh, IBM, DEC, and Honeywell, HP, DG, and WANG, AMDEL, NEC, and NCR, they don't know anything, Hey, they make big bucks for systems, so they never wanted it known That you can build a mainframe from the things you find at home. Now take the CPU, you see, it's only just a box With blinking lights and whirring fans and lots of cable slots. I spent some nights fiddling with some nuts and bulbs and pins, Then I hauled them to the basement and I plugged the freezer in! (chorus) I had to have a tape drive. My tape drive was a steal: I went up to the attic to get my dad's old reel-to-reel. Some binder twine and duct tape and my system was complete: A CPU and tape drive at a price no one can beat! (chorus) I had to have a disk drive, it didn't take me long. Function follows form, they say, or have I got that wrong? I found a drive with 5 new modes that blows the rest away: Cottons, linens, wash-and-wear, rinse, and lingerie! (chorus) I had to have a console just to make my system run. Without a proper console, then my system wasn't done. I tied a 10 buck keyboard to a broken TV tube, So now I've got a console that can write the evening news! (chorus) I've had my system running; I'll admit it's not the best: The data isn't right and the response time is a mess, It crashes every hour, and it isn't worth a damn. But I'm satisfied because it runs just like an IBM! (chorus: repeat last line of chorus) |
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02 Mar 04 - 09:22 AM (#1127640) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Do It Yourself Mainframe From: GUEST,leeneia Thanks, Eden. It's a good song. Your mainframe might not handle data well, but with the TV included it should perform one of the main functions of a computer - providing a warm place for the cat to snooze. |
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02 Mar 04 - 09:27 AM (#1127645) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Do It Yourself Mainframe From: The Fooles Troupe I remember our UQ DEC techies laughing about the early days when if you did the right sort of track seek patterns on the hard drive (they were as big as washing machines for only a few Megabytes!) you could have Hard Drive Races across the floor..... Robin |
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02 Mar 04 - 06:44 PM (#1128023) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Do It Yourself Mainframe From: Joe_F This seems to be by somebody named Vince Emery. I have it on a cassette called _The Funniest Computer Songs_ with copyright date 1989. I believe that "anything" should be "anythang". |
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04 Mar 04 - 07:39 AM (#1128982) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Do It Yourself Mainframe From: Eden Hehe. Well, it's one of the best filks I know. |
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04 Mar 04 - 09:47 PM (#1129502) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Do It Yourself Mainframe From: Gorgeous Gary The author of "Do It Yourself" is Bill Sutton...Atlanta, GA filker and Celtic musician. Home page at http://www.bsutton.com/, although the song isn't listed there (only about 8 of Bill's several dozen songs are). He's been toiling away at HP for many a year, which gives you some notion of where he got a few ideas from! 8-) -- Gary |
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10 Mar 04 - 07:56 AM (#1132919) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Do It Yourself Mainframe From: Eden Seriously, some of the things the guy used, such as the reel-to-reel, could actually be used in the functions he listed. I highly doubt the freezer and washing machine would, though! |
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11 Mar 04 - 04:58 AM (#1133676) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Do It Yourself Mainframe From: Nigel Parsons Of course, Bill Sutton was here in UK in Feb for the 16th British Filk convention Sixteen Tones. I didn't hear the song this time, but I did last time he was over Nigel |
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11 Mar 04 - 07:41 AM (#1133751) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Do It Yourself Mainframe From: Eden Uh-huh. Well, I hope SOMEone has checked out my Biotech Fantasy thread soon, because I don't like people who don't read things other people post. It's prejudice! |