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27 Mar 04 - 12:10 PM (#1147608) Subject: BS: Church Bullitins From: GUEST Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation. Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need ALL the help they can get. Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons. The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: "Break Forth Into Joy." A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow. At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice. |
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27 Mar 04 - 01:29 PM (#1147666) Subject: RE: BS: Church Bullitins From: Jeanie We apologize for any confusion that may have followed the typing error in last week's Bulletin. The subject of the illustrated talk to be given by our Choirmistress, Miss Pluck, at the April 'Senior Women's Monthly Bright Hour' will, of course, be "Smocking and Rugs", and NOT "Smoking Drugs" as originally advertised. (I used to have a whole book of these, Guest - thanks for reminding me !) - jeanie |
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28 Mar 04 - 07:22 AM (#1148123) Subject: RE: BS: Church Bulletins From: sian, west wales Wasn't there one like ... The Little Mothers' Union will have its first meeting of the new season in the Vestry this Friday. Women wishing to become Little Mothers should contact the Vicar... sian |
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30 Mar 04 - 08:22 AM (#1149896) Subject: RE: BS: Church Bulletins From: Roger the Skiffler A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work. Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch. The woman's husband also comes home. She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy is in there already. The little boy says, "Dark in here." The man says, "Yes, it is." Boy - "I have a baseball." Man - "That's nice." Boy - "Want to buy it?" Man - "No, thanks." Boy - "My dad's outside." Man - "OK, how much?" Boy - "$250" In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in the closet together. Boy - "Dark in here." Man - "Yes, it is." Boy - "I have a baseball glove." The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, "How much?" Boy - "$750" Man - "Sold." A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove, let's go outside and have a game of catch. The boy says, "I can't, I sold my baseball and my glove." The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?" Boy -"$1,000" The father says, "That's terrible to overcharge your friends like that... that is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess." They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and he closes the door. The boy says, "Dark in here." The priest says, "Don't start that shit again, you're in my closet now" RtS (I'll get me cassock...) |
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31 Mar 04 - 03:47 AM (#1150746) Subject: RE: BS: Church Bulletins From: katlaughing LOL, RtS!!! And the rest are good, too! |
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01 Apr 04 - 04:08 AM (#1151717) Subject: RE: BS: Church Bulletins From: GUEST,Boab "Another font has been installed at the west end of the church; the babies can henceforth be christened at both ends" "Since it is harvest time, my lady Wife will step forward and lay an egg on the altar..." |
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01 Apr 04 - 05:44 AM (#1151756) Subject: RE: BS: Church Bulletins From: BK Lick Don't let worry kill you -- let the church help. Thursday night - Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow. Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community. For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs. The rosebud on the alter this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer. Tuesday at 4:00 PM there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk will please come early. Wednesday the ladies liturgy will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing "Put me in my little bed" accompanied by the pastor. The service will close with "Little Drops of Water." One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in. Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come forward and do so. The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement Saturday. |
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02 Apr 04 - 04:52 AM (#1152628) Subject: RE: BS: Church Bulletins From: GUEST,BOAB Ah, BKLICK---You get the same quarterly magazine as me! Were you in the chemical industry? |
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04 May 04 - 12:10 PM (#1177472) Subject: RE: BS: Church Bulletins From: GUEST This was a typed in our Sunday morning bulletin. Please pray for our sick and shit in. |