|
16 Aug 04 - 12:39 AM (#1248413) Subject: BS: Bones From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull Don't put bones in the toilet, as it blocks it up. now it is hot weather, so i put a few bones down my toilet, but now its blocked up, i tried poking them with a stick from the garden, and a coat hanger, but now they are stuck. its not my house, so i'll phone the landlord tomorow. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 12:43 AM (#1248414) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull is there any chemical that will dissolve bones? i saw that Mr Muscle unblocker liquid, but it was £3, and i don't know if it will work, and i dont want to waste money. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 12:45 AM (#1248415) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: GUEST,JohnO'Lennaine OK, I won't. Ta. John Who's bones? |
|
16 Aug 04 - 12:54 AM (#1248422) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Peace The stuff wot eats yer bones will also eat yer plumbing. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 02:27 AM (#1248446) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: ranger1 jOhn, what were you doing putting bones down the toilet in the first place? They weren't Brenda's, were they? |
|
16 Aug 04 - 02:28 AM (#1248447) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Liz the Squeak Sounds like a plumber is required to remove the blockage in the pipes and it's not a small job. Just because it's not your house, doesn't mean you won't have to pay. Your landlord is not liable to pay any bills he considers avoidable. If you have blocked the toilet with something that should never have been put down there, (and one has to ask, WHY?) he may insist you pay for its removal. Sorry mate..... LTS |
|
16 Aug 04 - 03:21 AM (#1248472) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: fat B****rd Ah !! Dem bones.... |
|
16 Aug 04 - 03:34 AM (#1248479) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rasener Are they Tom Paines Bones ? :-) |
|
16 Aug 04 - 03:38 AM (#1248482) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Georgiansilver Dem bones dem bones dem stuck bones, Dem bones dem bones dem stuck bones, Dem bones dem bones dem stuck bones, Is blockin up me bog. Her thigh bone's connected to the "S" bend, Her thigh bone's connected to the "S" bend, Her thigh bone's connected to the "S" bend, And the flamin thing won't move. Her ankle bone's connected to her thigh bone, Her ankle bone's connected to her thigh bone, Her ankle bone's connected to her thigh bone, I can see it round the bend. Her shull bone's connected to her ankle bone. Her skull bone's connected to her ankle bone, Her skull bone's connected to her ankle bone, And it stands proud in the pan. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 04:29 AM (#1248501) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Sttaw Legend jOhn, you did BURY that cat you found in your dustbin didn't you? |
|
16 Aug 04 - 04:34 AM (#1248502) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: jacqui.c I reckon it's the old guy that told him off for throwing an apple core in the street. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 04:53 AM (#1248514) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Sooz You won't make old bones........ |
|
16 Aug 04 - 06:00 AM (#1248534) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rasener Just found the solution to your problems John :-) http://www.epic40k.co.uk/epicomp/stpage14.html |
|
16 Aug 04 - 06:19 AM (#1248542) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Pied Piper Why didn't you use an Acid bath BEFORE you flushed her down the bog? I recommend a mixture of Nitric and Hydrochloric to deal with those stubborn gristly bits. PP |
|
16 Aug 04 - 07:34 AM (#1248563) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Cllr Is this for real? if it is a dog rather than a cat it could be "bone a fido" |
|
16 Aug 04 - 07:41 AM (#1248565) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: greg stephens It's easy to get confused after a few bears, isnt it Sir JOhn? Question is, did you take a dump in the bin in the kitchen as well? |
|
16 Aug 04 - 07:52 AM (#1248573) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Sooz The gristly bits dissolve better in caustic soda. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 08:20 AM (#1248585) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Steve Parkes You reckon he's been putting BEARS down there as well, Greg?! |
|
16 Aug 04 - 08:21 AM (#1248587) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Steve Parkes Or maybe the bears were too far from the wood ... |
|
16 Aug 04 - 08:36 AM (#1248601) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: el ted jOhn, go to a plumbers merchant and ask for "one shot." It will shift anything, it is acid based so be careful. The plumb centre is near you, close to Ideal Standard. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 08:57 AM (#1248610) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: The Fooles Troupe Dem Bones, Dem Bones, Gonna Rise Again! |
|
16 Aug 04 - 09:43 AM (#1248622) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: SINSULL "now it is hot weather so I put a few bones down my toilet" HUH? What do you put down the toilet in cold weather? |
|
16 Aug 04 - 10:39 AM (#1248648) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: GUEST lots of bones? |
|
16 Aug 04 - 10:50 AM (#1248655) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: greg stephens Now I'm just making a guess here, but I suspect the scenario is something along the following lines(it combines the hot weather,and what we know of Sir JOhn's habits as outlined in many threads). I think Sir JOhn is maybe coming homeafter a visit to the pub,he's had a few bears, he's hungry. He gets a bag of spare ribs at the Chinese. The uneaten portion (bones, mainly) he leaves on the kitchen. Next day: gets up, goes to work,has a few bears,comes home,goes to sleep. Next day similar. Now this is where the hot weather comes in. he comes home around two in the morning, cracks a can of beer, and is sitting in his underpants, firing up Mudcat on the old computer and chatting with Spaw or Martin Gibson whatever. At this point he notices a dreadful smell. Possibly the underpants, but eventually he tracks it down to the rib bones on the kitchen table(it's been hot summer weather for two days, remember?). So, he's in his deshabilee, so he's not going down three flights of stairs and out to the backyard where the dustbins are, is he? He does what anybody would...chucks thhe bones in the bog, flushes it, and returns to Mudcat. And it is only the follwing morning, when he is at his ritual devotions in the bathroom, that he realises he has made a BIG MISTAKE, it and it is time for Mr Dynarod and his brightly painted van. Now, Sir JOhn, am I right, or am I right? |
|
16 Aug 04 - 11:30 AM (#1248688) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull Hello, this is what happened=I ate some soutehern fried chicken, and left the bones on the plate, and forgot about them, then next night i wanted to eat some food , and i was a bit pissed so i put them down the toilet, I reckon it would have been ok, if i put them a few at a time, but I was in a rush to eat some spagetty , so i just put them all at once, and it blocked up. I managed to fix it, by hittting them with the end of a brush, and smashing them up, so no need to call a plummer or the landlord. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 11:33 AM (#1248690) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull Good geuss greg! you should of been a detective! or maybe you was? anyway, i put them down the bog, as i didn't want bones stinking my kitchen out, and attracting flys and other bugs.. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 12:09 PM (#1248707) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: greg stephens No I was never a detective. But I was personally involved in a rather similar leftover chicken gumbo related incident, and your little problem vividly reminded me of it. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 01:44 PM (#1248748) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: PoppaGator BEST THREAD YET! I try very hard not to laugh out loud while surfing the forbidden web at work, but this made me completely lose my cool. Thanks not only to Sir jOhn for confessing his antics, but also to greg stephens for reading between the lines and explaining it all to the rest of us. Hope you enjoyed the spagetty, jOhn! |
|
16 Aug 04 - 01:48 PM (#1248749) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Amos Geeze you guys!! In my house the dishes get done after the meal. Or at worst by the end of the same day. Wot are you, lizard brains? Surely you can do better than this!!! LOL!! A |
|
16 Aug 04 - 01:49 PM (#1248752) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: SINSULL Another bit of advice: Never put a jar lid down the johnny. I lived in an apartment for three years with a toilet that sometimes worked, sometimes didn't. Fortunately, I had two bathrooms. But one day, the super, totally frustrated with the non-cooperative toilet, stuck his hand down and came up with a mayonnaise jar lid. The former tenant must have dropped it down. When it turned sideways, the toilet flushed. When it lay flat, it blocked it. And plunging would dislodge it temporarily but didn't pull it up. So...don't flush jar lids down the johnny even if you are pissed. SINS |
|
16 Aug 04 - 02:28 PM (#1248771) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Stilly River Sage Timely thread--I spent last night changing out the guts of the toilet tank in my back bathroom. You know that rubber stuff (gaskets, clapper) that looks so efficient when you first put it in? Give it a few years and it's like India Ink every time you touch it during the repair job. It leaked a little after I finished last night so I turned off the water again. Don't want the toilet taking a leak! I tightened it a bit more this morning (the new big rubber gasket is so big that the tank rocks a bit) and turned the water on. I'm ready to go back to check it for leaks now, and am positively flushed with pleasure at the thought of not paying megabucks to a plumber. If someone were to bash a batch of chicken bones they'd tear this commode apart. I hope yours continues to work, jOhn. SRS |
|
16 Aug 04 - 04:29 PM (#1248845) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Little Hawk "He's dead, Jim." |
|
16 Aug 04 - 05:00 PM (#1248866) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Peace ". . . I gave my love a chicken that had no bone . . .". |
|
16 Aug 04 - 05:02 PM (#1248869) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Bobert Ahhh, the expression is "skelatons in the closet", jOhn, not "skelatons in the water closet".... Bobert |
|
16 Aug 04 - 05:20 PM (#1248886) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Georgiansilver Brings new meaning to "A body of water" eh? Bone appetit Sir John. |
|
16 Aug 04 - 05:22 PM (#1248889) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Georgiansilver Hey sir John... Did the problem drive you "round the bend" or was it just a "flash in the pan" so to speak..Probably left you looking "a bit flushed" but I'm sure you were "On the ball cock". Any chain reactions? |
|
16 Aug 04 - 05:24 PM (#1248892) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: GUEST That's what you get for trying to be all posh and eat off a plate. |
|
17 Aug 04 - 03:06 AM (#1249152) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: The Fooles Troupe ROFL! |
|
17 Aug 04 - 04:33 AM (#1249195) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Gurney You were lucky, john. I unblocked a lav that someone had flushed a child's toothbrush down, and it was not a pleasant experience. |
|
17 Aug 04 - 04:42 AM (#1249203) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Gurney Afterthought; The reports from folks at the Olympics say that you are not even allowed to put PAPER down the bog there. Yes, they give you a little box to put it in. Don't know if it is true, came from a slightly unhumourous sports commentator. |
|
17 Aug 04 - 04:55 AM (#1249210) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: HRH ted of hull Could well be true Gurney. I have been to Greece many times and you can't put paper down the toilet in most areas because the sewage is discharged untreatd, directly into the mearest river or sea |
|
17 Aug 04 - 05:17 AM (#1249219) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Steve Parkes The thing to do with chicken bones is to find a neighbour's dog you really, really hate, and feed them to it. The bones will splinter inside the dog's body, causing terrible damage, and the dog will die slowly in indescribable agony. You will hate yourself for the rest of your life, unless you really, really, really hate the dog. And your neighbour will probably murder you in a very nasty way. I don't recommend it myself. Or you could burn them and use them for fertiliser, ifyoiu have any house plants. Steve |
|
17 Aug 04 - 07:58 AM (#1249281) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Liz the Squeak Ah, yet another reason not to go to Greece..... LTS |
|
17 Aug 04 - 09:14 AM (#1249322) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: GUEST Greek sewage pipes are about half the diameter of our own. No idea why? But they can block and cause BLOWBACK. The technical term for a pan full of week old turds coming back to wave hello. |
|
17 Aug 04 - 11:23 AM (#1249405) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: SINSULL Sounds like a marine toilet. Paper is put in a liitle bin but never flushed. A thoroughly unpleasant solution. But this seems the proper time to tell the tale of the blocked pipe in my childhood home. Dad tried and tried to plunge and chemically unblock it but nothing...so he went down into the basement and disconnected the pipe amid %$#@&&^)(#%%&. You get the picture. He was angry. Well in his anger and frustration he grabbed a stick and pushed it deep into the blockage which of course let loose and gushed over poor Dad. He was covered with shit head to foot. My brother nearly choked to death trying not to laugh. Dad, in his usually calm manner said "If you F**kin' laugh, I'll kill you" then stormed up the stairs yelling an odd assortment of curses I had never heard before. This is where the story gets funny. We were Roman Catholic and were trained to respect nuns and priests. As Dad got the top of the stairs, there stood my cousin, Sister Eileen (or Michael, I forget)in full nun's habit. Dad, dripping fecal matter, stopped, did a lttle bow and said "Good morning Sister" She too nearly choked to death trying not to laugh. I wonder if someone had put chicken bones down the toilet? |
|
17 Aug 04 - 01:19 PM (#1249512) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: John MacKenzie Chicken Indaloo? I'm not coming to your curry shop John! Giok |
|
17 Aug 04 - 01:34 PM (#1249526) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rapparee Save the chicken bones. Clean them off (boiling is good) and put the cleaned bones into a jar of vinegar (the cheapest sort will do). Let them soak and soak, maybe for a week or more. You can then bend them and even tie them in knots, which will remain when they are again dry. Knotted bones are always good for a laugh, or even to win a bet. |
|
17 Aug 04 - 03:14 PM (#1249590) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: TheBigPinkLad Rapaire ... Viagra will straighten out your bone again. |
|
17 Aug 04 - 03:25 PM (#1249597) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: open mike in school we did an experiment with a nail soaking in a glass of coca cola ..the thing was rusty adn dissolving as i recall..so pour Coke down there to ream things out...Drano is Alkaline, (Basic), not acid...LYE... vinegar is acidic--do not miux the two unless you want a result like in my grade school where the boys put cherry bomb fire crackers downt eh toilet and blew one up. |
|
17 Aug 04 - 05:09 PM (#1249710) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rapparee Actually, adding a base to an acid will neutralize both. I wouldn't drink the result, however. Ye Olde Coca-Cola Soake for nails, bologna, and stuff like that has been around for a while and one mostly to demonstrate How Awful Coke is for your innards. Of course, if you retain Coke in your stomach long enough to dissolve the stomach lining, you have much bigger problems and should have sought medical help a long time ago. Reminds me of the teacher who dropped a worm in a glass of water and the worm thrived. She dropped a worm in a glass of whiskey and the worm shriveled up and died. She asked the class, "What does this prove?" and someone responded, "If you have worms, drink whiskey." |
|
17 Aug 04 - 05:22 PM (#1249724) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rapparee One thing: never, ever, mix ammonia and chlorine bleach. The results can be fatal at worst, awful at best. Both ammonia and chlorine gases are liberated, and they can literally rot out your lungs if you breath them. Believe this. I tell you this so you can learn from the experience of someone else. |
|
17 Aug 04 - 05:27 PM (#1249731) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rasener When we stayed on the South coast of Chios ( a small greek island just off the Turkish Coast) , we had a room in a taverna on the beach. The room next door was used for cleaning all the fish that was caught. It smelt disgusting. What was worse was that in the morning you wanted a shower shave and Sh**. Great you were able to do that in the public toilet. The shower head was above the toilet base on the floor. So you stood with feet wide apart so you didn't stand in all the smelly t***s, whilst you had a shower. However if you timed it to perfection you could have a sh** whilst you attempted to have a shower. Anybody walking by could see what you were doing or could come in and have one themselves. With a bit of practice, I was able to shave at the same time. You didn't need any toilet paper because the shower acted like a bide. Those were the days :-) Maybe that is why El Greko now lives near St Albans :-) |
|
17 Aug 04 - 05:32 PM (#1249738) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Georgiansilver Why didn't you say the showers were c... Les? |
|
17 Aug 04 - 06:14 PM (#1249791) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rasener Wanted you to experience the sheer joy of greek craphouse :-) |
|
17 Aug 04 - 06:16 PM (#1249794) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Georgiansilver Been there Les...Went to Zakynthos a couple of years ago so know what you mean.....LOL |
|
18 Aug 04 - 07:25 AM (#1250208) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: The Fooles Troupe At least women won't complain about the guys not putting the lid down I suppose ... |
|
18 Aug 04 - 09:16 AM (#1250288) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Roger the Skiffler ..and when you get back from Greece you have to remember to revert to UK practice or the bathroom bin.... RtS (nuff sed!) |
|
18 Aug 04 - 11:26 AM (#1250409) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rasener Do you think El Greko has a toilet like that in his house :-) LOL |
|
22 Aug 04 - 12:05 PM (#1253498) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Bee-dubya-ell Free advice. Resist the temptation to use the top of your toilet tank as a place to keep knick-knacks, cosmetics, perfume bottles, medicine bottles or anything else that is small and could easily be knocked into the toilet bowl. I once had to completely remove a toilet and turn it upside-down to remove a stuck perfume bottle my wife had left on the tank top. |
|
23 Aug 04 - 03:25 AM (#1254231) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull bones are rubbish. |
|
23 Aug 04 - 08:39 PM (#1254866) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: SINSULL Yes, jOhn. Chicken bones are rubbish so put them in the trash. |
|
24 Aug 04 - 01:37 PM (#1255441) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Cluin Yes. Then you can see what else has been thrown in your bin and you can start another thread on that. |
|
01 Feb 07 - 08:42 AM (#1954458) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: GUEST,jOhn I'm not alone, in this type of thing, I heard that the Indian lady in Big Brother did this as well. |
|
01 Feb 07 - 08:54 AM (#1954475) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Scrump Best to dissolve the bones in a bath of acid Mwahahahahahahahahaha (with lots of reverb) |
|
01 Feb 07 - 09:43 AM (#1954532) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: Scoville I had an anthropology class in college that required us to dissolve "paleofeces" (read: really old human waste) in a solution and then catalog what we found in it. The sample I studied had jackrabbit vertebrae. I'm hoping they were acquired after-the-fact in the midden heap and weren't eaten and passed with everything else. Ouch! |
|
01 Feb 07 - 10:09 AM (#1954566) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: GUEST,ozchick where has my chicken gone....? |
|
01 Feb 07 - 10:10 AM (#1954568) Subject: RE: BS: Bones From: GUEST,ozchick she's been away, for so long..... |