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22 Aug 04 - 12:26 PM (#1253524) Subject: hot air from both sides From: GUEST A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am. The man consulted his portable GPS and Replied, "You're in a hot air balloon approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea level. You are 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude." She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be a Republican." "I am," replied the man. "How did you know?" "Well, answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me." The man smiled and responded, "You must be a Democrat." "I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?" "Well," said the man, you don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it's my fault." |
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22 Aug 04 - 12:35 PM (#1253534) Subject: RE: BS: balloon flight to nowhere! From: Stilly River Sage It is time soon for all of that republican hot air, isn't it? Friends in New York are dreading the onslaught of the holier-than-thou convention. |
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22 Aug 04 - 04:38 PM (#1253715) Subject: RE: BS: balloon flight to nowhere! From: robomatic Not only will the RNC be full of hot air, you won't find an entrance or exit that is straight. |
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22 Aug 04 - 04:49 PM (#1253724) Subject: RE: BS: balloon flight to nowhere! From: Blackcatter Theres are exactly the kind of threads GUESTS should not be allowed to start. |
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22 Aug 04 - 04:56 PM (#1253730) Subject: RE: BS: balloon flight to nowhere! From: SINSULL I have family running for the hills out of NYC that week. I expect they will stay with me until the worst is over. Oh how I hate presidential election years. By November I will be unable to watch TV or listen to the radio without hearing "I'm _____ and I approved this ad". Like i care. |
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22 Aug 04 - 04:57 PM (#1253731) Subject: RE: BS: balloon flight to nowhere! From: Ellenpoly Doesn't this belong on the Political Joke thread? (I don't find it funny, mind you, but it seems like it doesn't have anywhere to go...much like that balloon.) ..xx..e |
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22 Aug 04 - 05:17 PM (#1253749) Subject: RE: BS: balloon flight to nowhere! From: Little Hawk That joke used to be about accountants. It's a rehash of an old joke. There's probably a version about lawyers too. Anyone who imagines that either the Democrats OR the Republicans will do anything useful for America or the World is living in fantasyland. Or in the USA. Kind of the same thing, actually. |
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22 Aug 04 - 07:16 PM (#1253858) Subject: RE: BS: balloon flight to nowhere! From: Amos I first heard it told about Microsoft.... it is ancient, and I see no merit in resurrecting it to derogate yet another category. A |
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23 Aug 04 - 12:00 AM (#1254114) Subject: RE: BS: balloon flight to nowhere! From: mack/misophist Cleverness should be recognized and rewarded. Except when it's a goddam lie. |
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23 Aug 04 - 01:08 AM (#1254151) Subject: RE: BS: balloon flight to nowhere! From: Amos The woman had no business operating a balloon if she couldn't use a chart and compute latitude and longitude. And how come she didn't have a GPS of her own? This is an unrealistic story. A |
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23 Aug 04 - 12:51 PM (#1254567) Subject: RE: BS: balloon flight to nowhere! From: Little Hawk Why did the Republican cross the road? He thought the money was on the other side. Why did the Democrat cross the road. Same reason! Not very funny, right? Neither was the joke that started this thread. |