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15 Sep 04 - 03:28 AM (#1272090) Subject: BS: saddest shopping list From: Davetnova I went shopping at my local all night supermarket last night. At the checkout it dawned on me that I had a very sad basket of shopping. - One packet of dried cat food - One tin of dog food - One packet of chocolate biscuits - One half bottle of whisky. What does that say about my life? Has anyone got a sadder list? |
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15 Sep 04 - 03:31 AM (#1272093) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Georgiansilver Yes, I can't afford to eat cat or dog food never mind biscuits. From what you bought you can at least eat well and get drunk. Best wishes. |
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15 Sep 04 - 03:32 AM (#1272094) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Paco Rabanne How long have you been eating catfood then? |
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15 Sep 04 - 03:49 AM (#1272102) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Gurney Take the dog for a walk in the park, you may meet someone nice. Invite them back to your place for a biscuit and a tot. Providing it isn't a bull-terrier or something, there's not much better for pulling. A bunch of lilies and a black tie would be sadder, but in a different sense. |
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15 Sep 04 - 03:55 AM (#1272108) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Dave Hanson Now it would have been VERY sad without the whisky. eric |
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15 Sep 04 - 04:19 AM (#1272130) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST,Mingulay How does a dried cat manage to eat anything unless you use the whisky to rehydrate it. The cat that is, not the food. My local supermarket doesn't stock dried cats. So what's chocolate biscuit and dog food like together, and do you spread it on top of one or sandwich it between two biscuits to give a higher chocolate percentage? How about Milk Marmite Loo roll Pete |
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15 Sep 04 - 05:20 AM (#1272149) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: McGrath of Harlow Not at all sad in either sense. Just shows a sensible set of priorities - you feed the cat, then you feed the dog, then you have something tasty for yourself and pour yourself a good drink. |
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15 Sep 04 - 05:38 AM (#1272165) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST If you are not up to it yourself, there are organizations that can/will/do assist in euthanasia. |
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15 Sep 04 - 05:44 AM (#1272172) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: The Fooles Troupe "Receipt for return of unopened pack of condoms" |
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15 Sep 04 - 09:34 AM (#1272327) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: jimmyt Condoms, Playboy Mag,Cigarettes |
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15 Sep 04 - 09:36 AM (#1272331) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Paco Rabanne Condoms, Gay news, halibut |
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15 Sep 04 - 09:39 AM (#1272335) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: wysiwyg Our grocery store has a pharmacy in it. Lice shampoo, prescription for penicillin, lighter fluid. ~S~ |
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15 Sep 04 - 09:41 AM (#1272340) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Sttaw Legend Halibut, pure filth. |
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15 Sep 04 - 09:43 AM (#1272341) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Paco Rabanne Condoms, gay news , violin then Dave? |
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15 Sep 04 - 10:01 AM (#1272368) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST,Kim C no cookie You have pets. That isn't sad at all. |
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15 Sep 04 - 10:33 AM (#1272399) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST,SueB Here is a sadder one - 2 pints of Ben and Jerry's Chunky Monkey ice cream and a People magazine. |
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15 Sep 04 - 11:06 AM (#1272444) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: jimmyt Colby Cheese, Immodium, Toilet paper |
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15 Sep 04 - 11:14 AM (#1272453) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Paco Rabanne banjo, marmite, skip. |
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15 Sep 04 - 11:14 AM (#1272454) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Jeri It's not that sad, but... Ben & Jerry's chocolate ice cream Box of chocolate chip cookies 2 large chocolate bars Midol Tampons |
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15 Sep 04 - 11:18 AM (#1272461) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: wysiwyg Wait-- Hers: Viagra, Grecian Formula, roses. Awwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!! His: Monistat, Orajel, chocolate. ~S~ |
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15 Sep 04 - 11:29 AM (#1272479) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST,noddy tin of prunes bunch of figs pack of dates roll of toilet paper |
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15 Sep 04 - 12:55 PM (#1272588) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Michael Only one roll, Noddy? |
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15 Sep 04 - 02:29 PM (#1272676) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: greg stephens |
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15 Sep 04 - 02:39 PM (#1272680) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: jimmyt Preparation H, Pennicillin,Quell,Denture Cream, Hearing Aid Battery, Pop Tarts,Bear |
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15 Sep 04 - 02:42 PM (#1272686) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: fat B****rd Anusol, Fixadent, Listerine. |
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15 Sep 04 - 02:51 PM (#1272697) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: HuwG I went to the checkout at the local supermarket, with a small loaf, one pint of milk, some single portion pizzas and curries, several cans of beer ... The girl on the till said, "I can see that you're not married." I said, "How ?" She said, "You're ugly." |
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15 Sep 04 - 03:06 PM (#1272713) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: frogprince I was looking around in a local store when a ypung clerk asked if she could be of assistance. I said "Yes, I was looking for some kilbasa". "Oh", she said, "you must be Polish!" "How did you know?" said I. "Because", she replied,"This is a hardware store". |
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15 Sep 04 - 04:02 PM (#1272762) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Liz the Squeak Ah... Good old Anusol. It's the sponsor of the chair in our local pharmacy... one of those hard, plastic, pile causing chairs. LTS |
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15 Sep 04 - 05:35 PM (#1272825) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST,amergin HuwG, you should have told her, "Not after a few of these" and pointed to the beer. |
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15 Sep 04 - 05:43 PM (#1272833) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Teresa four pages of stuff ... then discovering you can't bake your cookies unless you go back, because you forgot that thing you went there for. ;) T |
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15 Sep 04 - 10:52 PM (#1273040) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: The Fooles Troupe "Only one roll, Noddy?" He's not planning to leave till the job is finished... |
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16 Sep 04 - 03:19 AM (#1273150) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Davetnova All right so its not that sad. My life seems fairly good now (in comparison) thanks all for that. |
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16 Sep 04 - 03:25 AM (#1273153) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Paco Rabanne Just stop eating dried cats Dave, it scrambles your brain and eventually affects your spelling. Look what happened to jOhn! |
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16 Sep 04 - 11:21 AM (#1273219) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST,skipy a banjo and a "how to play banjo book" |
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16 Sep 04 - 08:37 PM (#1273673) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Sam L What gets me is the inexorable march of my grocery items on the belt, like lemmings to the sea. |
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17 Sep 04 - 04:49 AM (#1273841) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST,Mingulay I hate the condescending way they ask if you would like help with packing, as if being over 50 means you've never seen a carrier bag before. I once, mistakenly, said yes and then spent half an hour separating the bacon from the eggs. They never seem to go back into their shells as easily as they come out do they? Mushy peas Cider Madras curry paste Pickled eggs Nose clip Certificate of exclusion from the rest of humanity Cheap fish fingers (for jOhn in 'Ull) |
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17 Sep 04 - 07:57 AM (#1273946) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Mr Red Davetnova - sad would be those items on a supermarket single night, the lack of contacts would inform you thus. UNLESS you took the dog - guarranteed to strike conversations with like minded intersted parties (of the first part). |
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17 Sep 04 - 12:28 PM (#1274190) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST,SueB Certificate of exclusion from the rest of humanity? What's the name of that store, again? |
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17 Sep 04 - 06:28 PM (#1274528) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Bill Hahn//\\ one memorial candle for a romantic evening with someone you met----check Woody Allen's film---Play It Again Sam. Honestly--- Davetnova really has a sad list---but at least he has the companionship of the dog and cat. I hope. If not the whisky surely comes in handy---and, who was it--Richard Pryor?---his friend that visits with him each day---the bottle. Bill Hahn |
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17 Sep 04 - 10:07 PM (#1274695) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST,RIchard Bridge with no cookie One pack of dog food implies a very small dog. But half a bottle of whisy is always sadder than a whole one. |
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17 Sep 04 - 10:38 PM (#1274715) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Stilly River Sage I see I'm not the only one who wonders at the temporal relationship between the various items being purchased by the customer ahead of me. Are they for one occasion or to spread around the house? In the morning if I stop by the store after dropping off the kids at school and get in line following a young store employee buying a bag of Krispy Creme donuts and a Diet Coke, I bite my tongue about suggesting a healthier breakfast. I'm kind of intrigued by the guys who go through line on Saturday afternoon with a couple of good steaks, wine, salad fixings, dessert, pharmaceuticals, and a bouquet. It's tempting to make a remark or just give them a wink, but again, I keep it to myself. SRS |
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17 Sep 04 - 11:27 PM (#1274724) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Bert Ramin noodles Roach bait Corn Plasters Air Freshener |
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18 Sep 04 - 06:20 AM (#1274838) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull "Packet of dried cat food" What do dried cats eat? |
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18 Sep 04 - 07:48 AM (#1274867) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Big Al Whittle What would be a happy shopping list. I have a feeling that the contents of your supermarket basket don't reveal much about the sadness and gloom in your life, or the opposite. The merry families with supermarket trollies piled high and the smart looking couples with bottles of wine and gourmet this and that sometimes remind of a line from Philip Larkin A joyous shot at how life ought to be...... |
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18 Sep 04 - 12:13 PM (#1274994) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: open mike oh i thought this would be about a sadist's shopping list... whips, chains, etc. glad to see it is not... decongestant, kleenex, throat lozenges, cough drops, pain and fever control medicineand a heating pad...now that would be an unfortunate list! |
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18 Sep 04 - 12:40 PM (#1275012) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Sttaw Legend Marmite Peanut butter Bed bugs Bananas Stick insects Corn plasters Vocalzones Bed socks Lavender bag Mosquito repellent |
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18 Sep 04 - 02:46 PM (#1275102) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Peg hmm, well a sad one recently was my first stop at CVS after breaking my leg and getting surgery: Vicodin, Vioxx, aspirin, Vitamin C, calcium supplements... Only thing I am still taking are the vitamins! I like to look at what people buy at the market, helps me figure out who they are. Or maybe not. I always wonder if the check-out folks actually notice this stuff. Carol Burnett did a hilarious sketch about a guy at the market with a girl (Harvey Korman and Vicki Lawrence) who check out their stuff with a ditzy cashier (Burnett) and he has bought a bunch of embarrassing sleazy date items like scented candles, tinned oysters, etc. |
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18 Sep 04 - 08:14 PM (#1275240) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Sorcha My usual list.... Plain yogurt (dog food) Tinned pumpkin (dog food) Safflower oil (dog food) Delicious Apple (dog food) Kibble (dog food) Glucosomine/Chondroitin liquid (dog food) Cigs (not dog food) Beer (not dog food) And, when I was growing up the Basic List was: Beer Milk Bread Cigs Diapers Dog food Not necessarily in that order. |
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18 Sep 04 - 08:55 PM (#1275271) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Big Al Whittle I bet thats one regular dog. |
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18 Sep 04 - 11:36 PM (#1275343) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: RangerSteve During a major snow storm, after I realized I wasn't going to make it into work, I stopped at the 7-11 and bought a half gallon of orange juice, a box of Entenmans chocolate covered donuts, and the NY Times. This was my idea of the perfect single guy's snowed-in shopping list. The guy next to me had the same stuff, but asked the cashier for a pack of condoms. Suddenly, my list seemed pretty sad. |
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18 Sep 04 - 11:49 PM (#1275346) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Kaleea Uh, pardon my inquisitiveness, but, um, just what grocery market sells half of a bottle of whiskey? Would that be the top half or the bottom half? Or does the bottle have some kind of divider down the middle with air on one side & the booze on the other? Is the bottle broken in half? What kind of Whiskey is it? just wondering . . . |
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19 Sep 04 - 12:03 PM (#1275600) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Mr Red Glenfidditch - but only from one side of the Glenlivet Valley. |
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19 Sep 04 - 05:03 PM (#1275838) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Big Al Whittle Is that a trick question, they all sell demi bottles, don't they? |
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19 Sep 04 - 05:11 PM (#1275843) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: ThreeSheds Ranger Steve Dont you think that the chap in front of you was just showing off? |
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19 Sep 04 - 05:14 PM (#1275845) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Micca Credit note for returned bunch of Flowers credit note for returned box of chocaltes credit note for returned Champagne Credit note for returned pack of condoms Tube of Clearasil |
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20 Sep 04 - 03:35 AM (#1276177) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: darkriver Hm. The saddest sight I ever saw in a market was one evening when the guy in front of me placed a small package of baloney and ONE can of beer on the belt. And jokes aside, he WAS ugly. doug |
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20 Sep 04 - 08:25 AM (#1276345) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST,noddy large mop bucket large roll of binliners rubber gloves air freshner. success at last. |
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20 Sep 04 - 09:48 AM (#1276405) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: GUEST "large roll of binliners, rubber gloves, air freshner." hhmmmmmmm...... |
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20 Sep 04 - 12:20 PM (#1276483) Subject: RE: BS: saddest shopping list From: Sttaw Legend Helpful Hint: Don't buy expensive 'ribbed' condoms, just buy an ordinary one and slip a handful of frozen peas inside it before you put it on. |