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01 Oct 04 - 08:15 PM (#1286534) Subject: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Bobert Well, Iz still tryin' to figurate these womenz so here's my latest question, which, as per usual, is about a friend of mine. So his wife get two tickets to the Waterford Fair, whcih is one big danged fair they have every year in the quaint little villiage of Waterford, Va. So my friend, who happens to have a bad right knee, consents to go and even suggests taking a small backpack in case his wife buys anything... So they go off to the fair. There are hundreds of vendors but after stopping at just three of them my friends wife has lightened my friends wallet by $60 and added 14 pounds to the backback... Hmmmmm? Get my drift here??? 3 venders down, $60 down and 14 pounds of stuff in the back pack and 214 venders left to see! Hey, it don't take a Wes Ginny Slide Rule to tell ya that at this rate that by the time my friend gets to the 214th veder, he'll have about 15 grand racked up on the credit card and about 6,793 worth of stuff in the backpack!!! So my firnd says somehting to that effect to his wife and his wife infomes him that he is a danged fair-pooper, 'er something like that.. But it mighta had some effect on my freind's wife 'cause she goes another 14 venders without another purchase... But through out the day the wallet gets lighter and lighter and the back pack heavier and heavier until, at last, the last vender: a vender who makes wooden kitchen stuff... Well, by now, my friend is beat... It's been 4 1/2 hours of following his wife from one tent to the next, never complaining, with little money left to his name, one heavy danged back back and a knee that's achin' with every step... Well, his wife buys a bunch of stuff there, too, which sghe says will be great for her daughters in law for Christmas... Fine. Right? Well, no!!! My friend and his wife get about half way back the mile to their car and the wife asks "Why didn't you buy me one of them salad thong things for a Christmas present?" Hmmmmm? So my firnd asks his wife why she didn't tell him that she wanted one and the wife says "YOU should have known!!!" Like what am I, a danged mind reader, 'er what? So I, I mean my friend, had to walk all the way back, 200 pounds of junk in the back back, knee clickin' and hurtin', to buy that salad thingie... All the while his wife followin' and sayin' "No, don't go back..." Well, I'm not sure my friend actaully has a question 'er not. He sure has a sore back and knee and no money and had swored off going to anymore Waterford Fairs, fir sure... But whadz with these womenz??? Heck, if they want somethin' why not just get it an' save the 200 pound backpack laden walk back for a danged salad thingie??? Yup, that is my latest question about womenz... Bobert |
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01 Oct 04 - 08:22 PM (#1286540) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: SINSULL i DON'T UNDERSTAND. hOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW THAT SHE WANTED ONE OF THOSE SALAD THINGIES? pAY ATTENTION, MAN, AND YOU WILL SAVE YOURSELF A LOT OF GRIEF. dAMN cAPSLOCK! |
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01 Oct 04 - 08:32 PM (#1286545) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: frogprince A salad thong? I've seen edible underwear before, but not that... |
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01 Oct 04 - 08:43 PM (#1286551) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Bobert Okay, it mighta been a tong? Thong? Tong? Bong 'er King Kong? Whad's any of it gotta do wid the question at hand? Bobert |
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01 Oct 04 - 08:47 PM (#1286553) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Little Hawk I thank the good Lord that I have never married one of them thar womenz in this life... |
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01 Oct 04 - 09:55 PM (#1286589) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: CarolC LOL! Maybe it wasn't the salad tong she wanted for Christmas, Bobert. Maybe what she wanted for Christmas was the sight of you trudging under that heavy load all the way back to the salad tong booth and then back again to the car! hahahahahaha... ( ...or maybe she wanted to see if you'd start a thread in the Mudcat about it ;-) |
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01 Oct 04 - 10:00 PM (#1286592) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: CarolC I'm picturing it in my head right now while listening to this music. hahahahahahaha... |
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01 Oct 04 - 10:12 PM (#1286596) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Bobert Thank God fir my sound card being down at the moment, CarolC... I'z been humilitated enuff fir one day... Man, do you know how far a half mile is with 300 pounds of useless stuff in yer backpack? Well, I'll tell ya'... Lets see? Hmmmm? Accordin' to the Wes Ginny Slide Rule its one heck of a long way!!! No hahaha's 'bout it... Danged............ Bobert |
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01 Oct 04 - 10:31 PM (#1286602) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: CarolC Yes I do know, Bobert. In some of my younger days, I used to climb mountains wearing a heavy backpack (with wooden cross-country skis attached). Some time you should try bathing a 200 pound arthritic St. Bernard dog. hahahahaha... |
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01 Oct 04 - 10:39 PM (#1286609) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Bobert Fine, CarolC.... Next year, you go the Waterford Fair with P-vine, I mean my friends wife and I'll, I mean my friend will bath yer St. Barnard, do all yer laundry, clean yer gutters and have a gormet dinner awaiting you when you return from yer day at the fair... Deal? Bobert |
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01 Oct 04 - 10:41 PM (#1286610) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: CarolC No way, Bobert! Your friend married her, he can figure out what to do with her stuff. I hate shopping. LOL! |
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01 Oct 04 - 10:57 PM (#1286619) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: MAG Try using your cane, so that you cannot steady the backpack. or bring your red wagon. and ask her, before you start, to drop a hint that even you couldn't miss, if she sees something that would make a welcome gift for her. |
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01 Oct 04 - 11:26 PM (#1286628) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: mg Tell her that your knee is bothering you and that she will have to do a good part of the towing of stuff She can get a little cart like they use for groceries. And it is unreasonable to expect that you should have known what she wanted. Limit your amount of time you spend at these things. Maybe go with her for one hour, take the purchases back to the car, and then take a nap, or have lunch somewhere closeby, or read a book. mg |
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01 Oct 04 - 11:56 PM (#1286637) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Miken Ah, Carol, you are a lovely person......lucky Jack........I laughed out loud too, Bobert!......Youa already know the answer, my friend!! Mike |
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02 Oct 04 - 01:49 AM (#1286662) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: GUEST,SueB I hate it when people start a sentence with "What you SHOULD have said/done ..." but I've got one of those for "your friend". What he should have said, when she said "why didn't you buy me etc" was "Because I already got you something much much much much better." Then, when your friend and his wife got home, he could have surreptitiously and sneakily pawed through the bags 'til he found the wooden salad stuff his wife picked up for Christmas gifts for other people, which would hopefully have the name and phone number or web address of the vendor in question, so he could then track down said vendor and order up a whole bushel of salad thongy thingies. And on Christmas morning he could whack her with them about the head and shoulders ... |
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02 Oct 04 - 02:39 AM (#1286675) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: JohnInKansas Bobert - Why is it that only womenz berate us about how we should have been reasonable and logical when we encounter a problem with our womenz, when it's universally accepted guy knowledge that "thet don't werk." (Wan't that the 'riginal point you were tryin' to make for your friend?) John |
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02 Oct 04 - 02:48 AM (#1286676) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Amergin Next time she has you Uh I mean your friend, tug all that stuff....demand that she carries you. |
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02 Oct 04 - 03:33 AM (#1286693) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: dianavan All I can say Bobert is, "She must be damned good..." d |
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02 Oct 04 - 03:52 AM (#1286698) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: jacqui.c My ex couldn't get it right even when he had a list of the things I would like for Christmas. He also infuriated me by 'not knowing' what he wanted, leaving me scratching about to get something that he would like. I hate the idea of spending money on presents that are wrong and either not used or got rid of at the first opportunity, hence the idea of wish lists. I also get annoyed with anyone who expects me to read their mind in situations like Bobert's friend's. OK, sometimes it is fairly obvious that someone is lusting after a particular item but we aren't all always totally open to the vibes, I would think in particular having spent so much time/money/energy trailing round a fair like that. |
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02 Oct 04 - 04:13 AM (#1286705) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: John MacKenzie In our family, I am the shopaholic, and my partner who trys to restrain my spendthrift ways. However when I try to solve the christmas/birthday present dilemma, by buying lots of different items, in the hope that I get it right at least once, I don't hear her complaining too much. Before you try this I recommend you buy your 'friend's' wife a backpack of her own. Giok. |
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02 Oct 04 - 12:34 PM (#1286890) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Amergin All you have to do is pay attention to what their likes are... |
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02 Oct 04 - 12:38 PM (#1286892) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: CarolC Thank you for your kind words, Miken. |
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02 Oct 04 - 12:39 PM (#1286894) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: GUEST womenZ? Quote "if you've had one, you had them all" |
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02 Oct 04 - 01:03 PM (#1286904) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Georgiansilver womenz is womenz and ne'er shall man truly understand them unless he be a woemnzly man himself. Best wishes. |
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02 Oct 04 - 02:04 PM (#1286932) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: GUEST Didn't you hear me the first tim,e Bobert? MEOW....THWAAAACCCK! You're doomed unless you make some changes quick! |
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02 Oct 04 - 11:51 PM (#1287222) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Blissfully Ignorant Why couldn't she have carried it herself? That's what i would have done... and then i would have complained all the way home of having an aching back, until the poor guy felt compelled to buy me something sweet/sparkly/huggable. No feminine wiles, that one...:0) And as for the salad tongs? Good grief, i dread the day that men catch up with us in terms of brains, and discover all our mind-games, it's going to be hell... *note*- heavy on the ol' sarcasm throughout:0) |
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03 Oct 04 - 02:35 AM (#1287247) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Rustic Rebel So what was the problem Bobert? |
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03 Oct 04 - 04:42 AM (#1287267) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: John MacKenzie Salad tongs! I dream of a girl who'd be satisfied with just salad tongs. Giok |
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03 Oct 04 - 05:18 AM (#1287275) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Hrothgar God bless the little dears/ |
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03 Oct 04 - 09:10 AM (#1287354) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Bobert Ahhhhh, my friend's back and knee are back to normal, which is in the dull ache discomfort level and he's feeling a lot better about the entire experience rhis morning. Oh, what a day of playing music and not shoppin' will do fir the body and soul... However, the mind readin' thing still haunts him since he knows that the scenerio will play out over and over... I think GUEST is correct in seeing my friend as "doomed"... But in the words of my father when as a rather nieve 12 years old and dove of the roof of the house into a 6" deep blow up pool to impress the girl next door and was not feeling to perky right after the dive: "Shake it off, son, shake it off..." Bobert |
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03 Oct 04 - 11:35 AM (#1287435) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: mg She is being unreasonable but probably can't help it. Maybe she needs little tokens of appreciation now and then. Pick up little flower boquets now and then, a small item at a craft fair that you are just guessing she might like. Tell her you are trying to intuit her wishes. if you guess right you are in luck. if you guess wrong and she is not being manipulative, she will appreciative the gesture, and understand that you are not all that great at guessing her needs and she will maybe be more realistic. If however, she is doing this as a manipulation, you will never ever win and are being abused. that simple. mg |
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03 Oct 04 - 12:24 PM (#1287461) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: CarolC What do you suppose would have happened if, when she begged you not to go back for the salad tongs, you had said, "ok", and then didn't go back for the salad tongs? |
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03 Oct 04 - 02:24 PM (#1287529) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: SINSULL hee hee - even I know the answer to that Carol. Don't set him up for failure. He does well enough on his own. |
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03 Oct 04 - 02:29 PM (#1287533) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: CarolC ;-) |
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03 Oct 04 - 02:33 PM (#1287536) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: GUEST So you stood next to her while she regaled the delights of salad tongs, she enthused about their usefullness as a gift? She didn't just pick them up and buy them did she? No, she lingered, looked again, maybe walked to the next stall and then returned, because the gravitational pull of the salad tong was too much to resist. Then they were purchased, no doubt she said a few times..." so and so will be pleased with them.." am I close? That means.." I WANT THOSE TOO, BUT I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I WANT THEM." Men!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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03 Oct 04 - 02:44 PM (#1287543) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: greg stephens Just wait till Christmas Day Bobert, when she's dancing round the Christmas tree wearing nothing but that thong, you (I mean your friend) will think it was all worth while. |
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04 Oct 04 - 01:49 PM (#1288425) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Stilly River Sage I vote she should have carried her own backpack. Also, she should have left you home and taken your money with her. Then she could have covered more ground quickly and picked up all that she wanted, and decided when it was too heavy and thus time to stop. SRS |
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04 Oct 04 - 11:34 PM (#1288802) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Bobert Salad thongs fir Xmas..... an' nuthin else, Gregster? Is that the scenerio? The P-Vine dancing around the Christmas tree with nothin' but sald thongs on? Oh, oh, oh... No, make that ho, ho ,ho.... (Hey, P-Vine, wanta see Rudolph?) Bobert |
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04 Oct 04 - 11:41 PM (#1288806) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: harpgirl Is there a guitar you want, Bobert? Tell her to buy it for you and then remind her that she should have known... |
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05 Oct 04 - 12:14 PM (#1289316) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: GUEST,SueB I should know better than to whack a hornet's nest with a stick, but I reread this thread and the phrase "my money" and "your money" stuck out like red flags. Is it all your money? Has she no money of her own? |
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05 Oct 04 - 12:39 PM (#1289347) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: GUEST,amergin Sure she does, Sue! Every penny of the money he earns is hers by right! |
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05 Oct 04 - 12:42 PM (#1289352) Subject: RE: BS: Bobert's latest question abount womenz From: Amos Bobert: I would like to hear what P-Vine's approach to your friend's problem would be. Any chance of getting her to read this thread and add some remarks? A |