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22 Nov 04 - 05:53 PM (#1335780) Subject: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Dave the Gnome Dear Aunty Clare I am a red blooded English male with a wife of 31 years and a family of 5. Trouble is I have just realised I have been enjoying Coronation Street (See 'Fight the Ban' thread). What's more I was lay on the sofa, with a cusion and a piece of chocolate cake! My only saving grace was that I also had a glass of whisky and I am dying from a cold. What do you think? Am I turning girly? Do you think I am becoming gay? Whay should I do to regain my stature... Yours despondantly Dave the Gnome |
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22 Nov 04 - 05:57 PM (#1335787) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Blissfully Ignorant Don't bother. Girly guys are better... Coronation Street, however..tsk, tsk! |
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22 Nov 04 - 05:58 PM (#1335788) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Ebbie DtG, there's just no doubt about it. It is how it begins. Sad. :~) |
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22 Nov 04 - 05:59 PM (#1335792) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Once Famous DTG Please don't tell me that you are starting to sit down when you pee. |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:01 PM (#1335799) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: freda underhill if you're lucky, you are.. |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:02 PM (#1335802) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Dave the Gnome Hehehe - Only if I think I am going to fall over, Martin. :D |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:03 PM (#1335804) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: CarolC Who is Auntie Clare? |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:03 PM (#1335805) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin Maybe some of that radical aversion therapy they tried in Clockwork Orange, o my brother and vredded droog? Have your rassoodock cheested. |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:05 PM (#1335807) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Blissfully Ignorant Oh, if you are turning girly...remember, always wipe from front to back! |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:10 PM (#1335817) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Dave the Gnome Eeeeeucchhhh - BI - Too much information! Aunty Clare is a generic agony aunt. I will only go for that Kubrick therapy if it involves brides in their undergarments... :D |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:11 PM (#1335818) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Metchosin Oh hell, I'm a red blooded Canadian woman with a husband of 32 years and a family of two and I've got a sinus headache, had to assist putting down a horse last week, watched Touching the Void on TV last night, dismantled the packing crate on a damaged lift of roofing material with a crow bar this morning and it still hasn't made a man of me. Chin up. |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:21 PM (#1335840) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: GUEST,John O'Lennaine Maybe Metchosin and Dave could do a swap for a while? Find our how the other half lives? |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:26 PM (#1335846) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Dave the Gnome Whereabouts in Canada, Metchosin? Son £3 is in St Stephen, New Brunswick at the mo. D. |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:38 PM (#1335862) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Blissfully Ignorant One can never be to informed about genital hygeine...:0) |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:41 PM (#1335865) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Sorcha LOL! Good Bliss! |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:45 PM (#1335868) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Clinton Hammond "Am I turning girly? Do you think I am becoming gay?" The two are NOT the same thing... But if you have to ask, then the answer is likely 'Yes'.... |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:45 PM (#1335869) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Metchosin About as far away from New Brunswick as you can get and still be in Canada, Dave, I'm on Vancouver Island in BC. |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:48 PM (#1335873) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Dave the Gnome Ahhh- OK, Met. Clinton - I hate you! I am even more confused now! :D |
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22 Nov 04 - 06:52 PM (#1335877) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: George Papavgeris DTG, just pop your clothes on the chair behind the screen, and I'll be round in a minute to examine you.... |
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22 Nov 04 - 07:08 PM (#1335882) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Dave the Gnome Eeeek - We all know what you Greeks are like! (Scene in 'Spitting Image' years ago. Queen and prince Philip in bed. You need to draw some attention away from the Children, Philip. What! Are you mad, woman? How do I do that? Well... You could say you are gay. Gay! I'm not gay1 Why would I say that? Well. You are Greek and they invented it....) Cheers DtG |
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22 Nov 04 - 07:56 PM (#1335912) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Ebbie Sidesweep... Metchosin, was that the one about the mountain climbers? I saw the last half or so. Riveting. But it made me cry. |
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22 Nov 04 - 08:30 PM (#1335928) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Alba Not answering for you Metchosin...but I am...lol Yes Ebbie, Touching the Void is the Film about the Climbers. Grim Tale that you want to stop watching but can't... astounding story. I cried too. DtG... I couldn't say if your turning Girly....but you really must be sick......Coronation Street....next it will be Eastenders then you REALLY have a problem:>) Blissy...good advice there... Blessings Jude |
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22 Nov 04 - 08:57 PM (#1335951) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: GUEST Run the f.g up the pole and see if you salute. |
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22 Nov 04 - 08:57 PM (#1335952) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: McGrath of Harlow I get the impression from my Radio Times that right now Coronation Street is in the middle of some high-octane plot with people burning down houses over other people's head and all that stuff. A Flame War in fact. |
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22 Nov 04 - 09:14 PM (#1335964) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Mudlark Oh, DtG, you have no idea how lucky you are to be ABLE to get Cor(o)nation St. It was on TV here in the US for a while several years ago, then disappeared and life...at least life at 8-9PM has not been the same since. I think you should come to Calfornia, and consult with our governor....who has the last word on girly men, one of his favorite epithets (oh, the shame of it!). Fess up to The Terminator, let him decide, then....go for it! (Whatever it is...) |
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22 Nov 04 - 10:09 PM (#1336002) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin Time to ask yourself some hard questions, mate. Will I give up control of the TV remote? Will I admit when I'm lost? Will I ask for directions? Do I think the Three Stooges are completely unfunny? Do I put the toilet seat back down in the dead of night? When I take the car to the garage, will I stay in the waiting room? Will I choose Ferraro Roche over fish & chips? Would you drink through a straw? Answer yes to any 2 of those and you might officially begin to worry. |
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22 Nov 04 - 10:10 PM (#1336005) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Peace DtG: I don't think so, but are you busy this Friday night? |
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22 Nov 04 - 10:15 PM (#1336012) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Rapparee DtG, As long as you don't pee when you sit down. |
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22 Nov 04 - 10:45 PM (#1336032) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Peace Jaysus, Rap. Don't place that condition on it all. I have hit the age where I pee when I sit, stand, walk, run, sleep, eat, think--well, I won't go on. DtG, don't worry about the pee thing. So, about Friday . . . . |
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22 Nov 04 - 10:52 PM (#1336038) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin One from Red Green: "I'm at the age where taking a pee is like watching the fireworks on Canada Day... It seems to take forever to start, then there's lot of ooh-ing and ah-ing, and then you're never quite sure when it's finished." |
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22 Nov 04 - 10:52 PM (#1336040) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Metchosin LOL! |
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22 Nov 04 - 11:05 PM (#1336047) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: MAG Who is laboring (labouring) under the delusion that wimen get to loll around watching delightful TV (tube) shows eating chocolate cake? It sounds lovely but it hasn't been my life. MAG (spent the day off shredding leaves, fixing the shredder, shredding leaves, fixing the shredder ...) |
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22 Nov 04 - 11:09 PM (#1336051) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Peace A man would just shred the leaves. When the shredder broke, he'd get a beer and consider the situation. Then get another beer, then another then another. OK, so it's five minutes later and now he's drunk. The leaves will keep. That's a fact. |
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22 Nov 04 - 11:10 PM (#1336055) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: GUEST,Aunty Clare Dear Dave, To regain your stature? Dear God boy, get off your bottom and your sofa. Do some push-ups. Mate your mate. Above all, stop that chocolate whiskey high your on. It's making you sound girly and gay. With fond wishes, Aunty Clare |
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22 Nov 04 - 11:32 PM (#1336081) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Metchosin Dear Aunty Clare, I've grown a few whiskers on my chin, recounted a few hunting tails...er ...tales, pissed standing up, knocked back quite a few beers and still failed to be recognized as a man. Am I doing something wrong too? Yours, alas, half a man, Metchosin |
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22 Nov 04 - 11:51 PM (#1336105) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin Metchosin, I think we got drunk together at a corn roast in 1980. Were you in the Forestry program at Lakehead U.? Sorry about leaving you with my roommate. But I really tought you were both too far gone to notice and besides, YOUR roommate was really cute. |
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22 Nov 04 - 11:53 PM (#1336109) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Peace Spoken like a true Canadian. |
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23 Nov 04 - 12:13 AM (#1336133) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Metchosin aw Cluin, so sorry to disappoint, but it wasn't me that night, because if it was, it would have been before I sprouted whiskers and I doubt you'd have ever abandoned me to a room mate, drunk or no. |
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23 Nov 04 - 12:19 AM (#1336140) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Peace Spoken like another true Canadian. God, I love this country. |
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23 Nov 04 - 12:20 AM (#1336142) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin Damn, still have step 8 to get through. Thought I could cross her off the list. Oh well... the search goes on. At least that night I did SOMEthing good. I stopped a buddy's guitar from being thrown on the bonfire, cas and all. |
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23 Nov 04 - 12:28 AM (#1336151) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: GUEST,Aunty Clare Dear Metchosin, You are woman, hear yourself roar? My dear you are a fine woman and you must know, it is the men of this world that have taken from women, the right to stand and pee. So knock back those beers my dear and start a new day by pissing in the wind with the boys. As for your sinus headache-sniff peppermint oil and the whiskers on your chin are noble and deserve their righteous place exactly where they are. With fond wishes, Aunty Clare |
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23 Nov 04 - 12:50 AM (#1336177) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Metchosin And that, drunk or no Cluin I would have applauded. There are sometimes priorities in life on a par with sex and at least as memorable. Thank you so much Aunty Clare for the reaffirmation and someday maybe I will have the courage or the outright indifference not to pluck. |
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23 Nov 04 - 12:55 AM (#1336182) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin I just wish I didn't have to jump in the fire to do it. It was about a month before the burns on my left hand healed enough to play my own guitar again. I missed it a lot, especially leading up to midterms. |
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23 Nov 04 - 01:09 AM (#1336203) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Metchosin oooo.....its amazing what some will go through to rescue a good guitar. |
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23 Nov 04 - 01:19 AM (#1336211) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin I must be twisted or something. I dunno if I'd have jumped in the flames for the girl. I didn't get lucky with her anyway; she was in Nursing and ended up washing and wrapping my fingers. If that wasn't an ice-breaker nothing was. |
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23 Nov 04 - 02:48 AM (#1336240) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: MBSLynne "I'm a lumberjack and I'm ok...." |
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23 Nov 04 - 03:42 AM (#1336258) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Davetnova Anybody can piss standing up. But after a heavy session by the campfire it can be useful to be able to pee lying down. |
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23 Nov 04 - 03:56 AM (#1336261) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: GUEST,Boab ---regain yer stature? Jeeze Dave---ye maun be gey wee if ye're a Gnome tae start wi'!!!:-) |
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23 Nov 04 - 04:43 AM (#1336277) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: John MacKenzie As I think I've said on here before, I remember 3 chemically enhanced girls at a party way back when, have a peeing standing up competition. A bit dribbly but uproariously funny, mind you we were all under the influence. Like BI says direction of wiping is important, unless you like peeing boiling water laced with razor blades. Stay away from East Enders if you are prone to depression, and you like decent acting. Giok |
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23 Nov 04 - 09:26 AM (#1336425) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Rapparee Now, back in me college days, when I was wild and free and could drink anyone anywhere under the table, I remember when Trudy and Gretch and Mary and...and...who was that?...anyway, these four girls got ahold of some...that stuff we used to smoke...you know...it wasn't tobacco...anyway, they decided that they'd challenge the guys to a contest to see who could...oh, yeah, piss over a fence, that was it...it was back in the '60s, as I remember, maybe around '65 or '66 or it could have been '67...so anyway, they won but the guys said that they cheated and...oh, DAMN those nights, they've taken 'way my brain...anyway, the girls won and beat the guys in the pissing over the church...no, it was a fence, wasn't it?...contest...but last time I talked to him Steve still said they cheated but I said that they won fair and square. |
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23 Nov 04 - 09:32 AM (#1336429) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Paco Rabanne DtG, You sound like a raging queen to me! A spot of fox hunting would help redress the balance. |
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23 Nov 04 - 10:30 AM (#1336481) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Peace Redress? Did you say REDRESS? So, about Friday. |
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23 Nov 04 - 10:44 AM (#1336498) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: freda underhill i met a woman, lets call her Daphne, who challenged a bunch of blokes to a pissing competition - she demanded one rule - and they agreed, and she won, hands down. the rule? no hands.... |
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23 Nov 04 - 12:10 PM (#1336595) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: ToulouseCruise DtG... Lots of us across Canada... I am a couple hundred miles from St Stephen, in Moncton NB.... Brian. |
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23 Nov 04 - 08:49 PM (#1337141) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: jaze Freda, where were they pissing? Down their legs? |
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23 Nov 04 - 09:51 PM (#1337206) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin freda, I hain't believin' that `un, b'y. |
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23 Nov 04 - 09:54 PM (#1337210) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Blissfully Ignorant I've had to pee standing up ever since i read those scary rats-in-toilets stories in the mouse thread... |
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24 Nov 04 - 01:39 AM (#1337307) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: JennieG I am told that if a woman bends over forwards, and pees while in that position she can outreach a bloke any day! Haven't tried it meself....... Cheers JennieG |
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24 Nov 04 - 02:54 AM (#1337330) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Blissfully Ignorant Oh wow, thanks for the tip! I am so gonna try that... |
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24 Nov 04 - 04:48 AM (#1337391) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: John MacKenzie Tickets tickets, I demand you sell tickets! Not that I'd look, as I'm too polite ;~) Giok |
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24 Nov 04 - 05:46 AM (#1337411) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: GUEST Damn you all! *L* Had to log out to post this, as I'm confessing to having a pee fetish, & am all 'excitable' now! Sorry for having to share that.... |
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25 Nov 04 - 01:21 AM (#1338465) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: JennieG BI, let me know if it's true! Cheers JennieG |
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25 Nov 04 - 01:23 AM (#1338466) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Peace GUEST, let me know if it's true. I go about twenty times a day. I'll save it and send if you wish. |
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25 Nov 04 - 01:28 AM (#1338470) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: freda underhill 's true. |
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25 Nov 04 - 01:35 AM (#1338478) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin Snot! |
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25 Nov 04 - 01:54 AM (#1338493) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Ebbie Ah but can she write her name in the snow at the same time? Ebbienotimpressed |
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25 Nov 04 - 11:50 AM (#1338879) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: GUEST,Mingulay I wrote my name in the snow once. Wrong handwriting. Big row. |
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25 Nov 04 - 04:57 PM (#1339126) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: GUEST *ROFLMAO* Er...thanks for the offer Bruce.... |
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25 Nov 04 - 07:03 PM (#1339220) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Blissfully Ignorant Well, here's the results of my experiment... I went outside, dropped my pants, bent over...then realised i didn't need a piss. Went back inside, waited till i needed a piss, went back outside...then i heard a car pulling up, and decided to postpone. Waited till car went away, started to repeat the procedure... noticed a squirrel was looking at me funny. My arse remembered it was November and started to freeze. Contemplated the fact that i was stood outside, in the middle of winter, with a frozen arse, trying to pee further for no good reason. Decided it wasn't worth the hassle...gave up. The moral of the story is- ladies, leave the pissing contests to the guys, we don't need them. We can have multiple orgasms. :0) |
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25 Nov 04 - 07:06 PM (#1339222) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Blissfully Ignorant Ha...that was the 69th post... |
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25 Nov 04 - 07:43 PM (#1339241) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: GUEST Well, Brucie's 'kind' offer calmed me down...a LOT....but now I'm all excitable again.... |
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26 Nov 04 - 03:10 AM (#1339421) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Peace I'd post more, GUEST, but I gotta go pee. |
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26 Nov 04 - 03:25 AM (#1339439) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Peace Re "Am I turning girly." Rest assured you're the way you want to be. I received no answer about Friday, so, snubbed, I slink off. |
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26 Nov 04 - 04:15 AM (#1339483) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: GUEST,SueB freda, very funny! (22 Nov 6 o'clock post) |
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26 Nov 04 - 06:30 AM (#1339545) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: freda underhill tis. (and its the woman's hips that have to tilt forward/upwards). |
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26 Nov 04 - 06:43 AM (#1339548) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: freda underhill thank you sue, takes a woman to appreciate that one. |
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26 Nov 04 - 09:51 AM (#1339682) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Dave the Gnome Didn't understand it at all so am I not as girly as I thought? :D |
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26 Nov 04 - 10:42 PM (#1340247) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: JennieG Don't worry about it Dave, just roll over and go back to sleep....... Cheers JennieG |
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27 Nov 04 - 12:25 PM (#1340531) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin When you have to fart in bed, do you lift a butt cheek by hand so as not to wake the spouse? |
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27 Nov 04 - 12:28 PM (#1340532) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: John MacKenzie Nah! I gently pull the duvet over her head, and then do it! Giok |
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27 Nov 04 - 04:16 PM (#1340679) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Cluin Ah, the dreaded Dutch Oven! |
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28 Nov 04 - 05:43 PM (#1341417) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Desert Dancer [I didn't pee in my pants exactly, but this thread did bring tears to my eyes, so REFRESH.] |
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28 Nov 04 - 06:23 PM (#1341442) Subject: RE: BS: Am I turning girly? From: Joybell freda, When is the workshop? Please book me in. Can I arrive wearing a brown paper bag over my head? Joy |