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28 Dec 04 - 10:27 PM (#1366461) Subject: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Shanghaiceltic Came across this on a website and as a cat lover (except when trying to wash them)I thought I'd share it with other feline loving catters. Instructions on cat grooming product, simplified for your convenience: 1. wet cat thoroughly 2. apply product and comb through cat.s wet coat. 3. keep cat from grooming for 10 minutes. 4. rinse product thoroughly off of cat. 5. dry cat to make sure (product) is completely off cat. Actual sequence of events: 0. cat senses you.re up to no good, hides under table. 0.2 cat runs under couch. 0.4 cat resists being picked up. 0.6 cat realizes it is being brought towards the sink. 0.8 mortal komcat! 1. wet cat thoroughly 1.2 put cat back in water and get another 1% of cat wet before cat gets out again. 1.4 amazingly, cat has managed to writhe into a position where she.s holding herself away from the faucet with all four legs, her head, and her tail. 1.6 reassure kitty that everything.s okay, yank head back to avoid claw in eye. 1.8 wet cat the rest of the way. 2. apply product and comb through cat's wet coat. 2.2 apply product with one hand while holding cat with the other 2.4 cat lunges for freedom, hides in bedroom. 2.6 find cat in box, continue grooming. 2.8 box falls to shreds, cat.s coat is fully combed through. 3. keep soaking wet cat from grooming for 10 minutes (no, really. these people are insane.) 4. rinse product thoroughly off cat. 4.2 carry festival of whirling sharp claws back to bathroom. 4.4 put cat near stream of water. 4.6 every movable object in the bathroom falls to the floor as cat struggles in matrixesque bullet-time and attempts to propel herself through ceiling. 4.8 cat gets washed. 5. dry cat thoroughly. 5.2 chase cat around apartment with towel. 5.4 wrap cat in towel, fluff dry. 5.6 cat gets out of towel. 5.8 see 5.4 6. cat stares balefully from the top of a bookshelf. 6.2 cat stares balefully from the top of a bookshelf. 6.4 cat stares balefully from the top of a bookshelf. 6.6 cat stares balefully from the top of a bookshelf. 6.8 cat stares balefully from the top of a bookshelf. |
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28 Dec 04 - 11:18 PM (#1366487) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Kaleea My kitty, who is now in kitty heaven, was a long haired little gal who violently hated baths, brushing, combing, etc. Steve Martin did comment years back about how he gives his kitty a bath. He says it's not too bad--the hard part is getting all the furr off of his tongue. |
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28 Dec 04 - 11:29 PM (#1366496) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: GUEST,bflat |
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28 Dec 04 - 11:32 PM (#1366498) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: GUEST,blat I hit the wrong key again as I did in another thread. I think it is a good idea to monthy wash kitty. I think an oatmeal shampoo makes for lustrious coat. kitty will get use to the idea. Ellen |
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28 Dec 04 - 11:53 PM (#1366505) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Bert You wrap the bloody moggy in towel to bathe it. |
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28 Dec 04 - 11:53 PM (#1366506) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: freightdawg Shanghaiceltic, That is one of the funniest things I have read in a long, long time. Thanks for sharing it. We have four kitties now, and had two others now deceased. Of the six cats only one was even remotely accepting of a bath, and that was because he got flea baths from the time he was a tiny little kitten. The four we have now are absolutely terrified of water, except when they approach it on their terms. However, hold them in your hands and walk toward the bathtup and WATCH OUT! And length of hair makes no difference - we have three short hair cats and one long hair. If you have not already, check out my Christmas story on the Christmas surprises thread. It chronicles one very intense 30 second period of our Christmas morning. Freightdawg |
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29 Dec 04 - 01:37 AM (#1366527) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Peace Apply shampoo. Put cat in toilet bowl. Close lid and sit on it. Flush five or six times. Open lid and stand way back. |
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29 Dec 04 - 01:46 AM (#1366530) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Metchosin LOL. Just curious, why do people find it necessary to bath cats in the first place? |
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29 Dec 04 - 02:30 AM (#1366547) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Gurney The only time we ever tried to wash a cat was when he had been under an oily gearbox. The cat did not enjoy it and I had a perfectly good pair of welding gloves ruined. The scars took a while to disappear, too. Cat scratches turn septic. |
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29 Dec 04 - 02:56 AM (#1366557) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Liz the Squeak A cat only needs bathing if there is some substance on the coat that will harm the cat if ingested, such as; washing up liquid. Yes, washing up liquid. Someone near a friend of mine thought it funny to cover one of her cats with washing up liquid in such quantities that the cat would have died if it had tried to clean itself. Cat was apparently sleeping harmlessly on a shed roof when the perpetrator decided to take the lid off a bottle of WUL and pour it liberally over the black and white cat to 'teach it a lesson'... Poor cat had about half a bottle poured over him, so much that he actually looked green from the neck down. It took 23 washes to get the green out, and a further 10 or so rinses until he stopped foaming. The poor cat sat there so patiently whilst we did it... the smell was overpowering us so he must have been totally overwhelmed. Mind you, at the end of it, he practically glowed, he was so clean!! LTS |
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29 Dec 04 - 04:09 AM (#1366581) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: JohnInKansas The usual when bathing a cat is that the cat tries to get away from the water, and if you're at a sink that means the cat climbs you like a tree. If you simply get in the bathtub/shower with the cat, when/if he/she struggles, the attempt will be to get OUT of the tub - which quite likely is in a direction away from the more delicate parts of your person should you lose control. Being much larger and possibly even a little smarter(?) than the average cat, controlling the poor critter for the duration of a necessary bathing should not really be much of a problem. With the dozen or so cats I've bathed in recent memory, they seem rather curious about the fact that I'm "in there doing it too" which seems to have something of a calming effect on them. Instead of abject panic they display more of a "passive evil loathing" of the process, at least. I've not been able to convince "she who owns them" that it's safe to expose one's naked body to potentially angry claws in this manner, but she shows no reluctance at demanding that I "do the deed" when needed. We've rarely needed to bathe fully adult cats, but young - through pre-adolescent, perhaps - kittens can be overwhelmed by fleas and sometimes by other parasites, probably because they don't spend sufficient time away from bedding or sleeping places that may be infested with eggs/larvae. There are few "treatments" that are effective for a bedding area that are safe to use with young cats. A good bath with an appropriate "flea soap" is often the best way to get them back to health; but it is essential that a "cat" soap be used since they may ingest significant amounts of residuals in grooming after the bath, regardless of how thoroughly they're rinsed. John |
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29 Dec 04 - 08:33 AM (#1366674) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Blissfully Ignorant I can honestly say that despite having owned several cats, i've never felt compelled to wash one... |
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29 Dec 04 - 08:33 AM (#1366676) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: The Fooles Troupe I had friends who claimed the only way they ever successfully did it was to get a large plastic rubbish bin, put the shampoo in the water and froth it up , then get the cat inside the bin with the lid on for a few minutes - this took about 27 pairs of adult hands as the cat sprouted a multitude of legs - then remove the lid, standing well back with a well aimed hose... My 2 little moggies; the black one just stood there and quietly accepted it - she loved ANYTHING I did to groom her - the white one would struggle a bit - but after I learned to keep a collar on and had something to hang on to, she tolerated it with a look of disgust in her eyes.... Both, though, did not protest, when in the height of Summer 30 + deg C weather (we can reach 40 Deg C in Brisbane) I would soak their coats in cold water and put them in a breeze - they would lick dry, so they got water too... |
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29 Dec 04 - 10:15 AM (#1366727) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: SINSULL I have had to do it and Bert is right. Hold a nice fluffy towel. Coax kitty in for a cuddle. Gently wrap kitty and claws in towel with head out. And DUNK!! Works too for kitties who refuse to take pills. |
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29 Dec 04 - 11:40 AM (#1366763) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: GUEST 1. Our two mogs have a tendency to climb into the kitchen sink, bath, or anywhere else that could possibly be interesting, and preferably smell of food. However - the merest drop of water is sufficient to send them to the other side of the room at top speed (and we're talking about a cat that can come in from another room, get past you and through the part open door in the time it takes to open the door enough for one to get through!). 2. Lots of good advice here about washing cats. Can anyone tell me why the cats keep trying to wash me, blankets, chairs, or anything else they're sat on? I hasten to add that I shower at least once a day... epn |
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29 Dec 04 - 12:17 PM (#1366791) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: beadie I once saw a set of instructions for this procedure using a large tube of K-Y lubricant jelly. This item served two distinct purposes. First, . . . the jelly was recommended for making the sidewalls of the bathtub slippery to inhibit (but only slightly) the cat's ability to escape. Second, . . . the tube could later be used to stun the cat with a sharp blow to the head if all else fails. "--- Mr. Spock, put your K-Y jelly on stun." |
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29 Dec 04 - 01:03 PM (#1366825) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Cluin No problem. 1. Grab cat by scruff of neck 2. Hold cat under shower head with water on, and your elbow held high so cat can't grab your arm. 3. Drop cat and let it tear out of bathroom like a shot. 4. You won't see cat for about two days and it will never forgive you anyway. The reason cats hate water is because they look so goofy when they're wet. Cats HATE looking goofy. Dogs thrive on it. Get a dog if you want to bathe your pet. Just don't bathe WITH it. |
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29 Dec 04 - 01:05 PM (#1366828) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Blissfully Ignorant What if you gave it catnip first? |
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29 Dec 04 - 01:25 PM (#1366844) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Cluin Is that like a Date Rape Drug for cats? |
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29 Dec 04 - 01:34 PM (#1366851) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Blissfully Ignorant It's supposed to have an opiate-like effect, cats go all strange when they eat it. I tried smoking it once....i have come to the conclusion it only works for cats. Banana skins, peanut skins, catnip... all a load of bollocks. Save yourself the trouble and buy some pot....:0) |
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29 Dec 04 - 02:07 PM (#1366877) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Ebbie brucie, that was the funniest thing I have ever read. Mind you, I wouldn't do it but it is a very funny image. |
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29 Dec 04 - 06:38 PM (#1367128) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: The Fooles Troupe Catnip has no effect on some cats - it apparently is a genetic thing - also many Aussie cats seem to have this mutation. |
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29 Dec 04 - 07:08 PM (#1367154) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: robomatic When I was younger and (even) stupider I shared a house with a cat owner. I loved (no, really) her cat but abused her pretty shamelessly, and, cats being what they were, she loved me back, sometimes with claws, sometimes out of pure masochism. As my brother was fond of saying (about the cat): Pet her, she purrs, Pet her, she purrs, Pet her, she BITES, Hit her, she purrs. Anyhow, she rolled in something dead in the street, and being a long hair, she badly needed to be washed. She didn't see eye to eye with us on this point, so in the end we drew a warm bath of water, drew the shower curtain, tossed her in, and repeated as necessary. The result was: Many claw marks in shower curtain wet floor shrunken cat But the smell improved even if her temperament didn't. She has long gone to that 10th life, but I know that wherever she is, she has no concept of forgiveness. |
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30 Dec 04 - 01:56 AM (#1367397) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: georgeward Vaughn (my late wife and partner) used to tell this true story on us. So, in her memory.... We once lived on a rural, two-lane road at an old farmstead - house on one side of the road, barns on the other. Our little Siamese loved to cross the road to explore the barns, do the predator thing and snooze. Next-to-no-traffic, so it was pretty safe. One sunny, summer morning while the cat was thus employed in the barn, the county repaved the road! The cat's solution to the newly tarred, still-hot rd. was to tear across it, heading for home at top speed. There are no mudflaps on a cat. It was our first (and only) experience of what tarring-and-feathering must have been like. The vet did not (for some reason) urge us to bring the tarred cat into his clinic. Instead, he advised us to soften the tar that liberally coated our poor dear with vegetable oil...which did spread it nicely. We oiled, wiped, oiled again and wiped again until our formerly lilac-point siamese was a blue-eyed, pathetic creature of a sickly yellow color slowly turning rancid in the late afternoon sun. We were of about the same color, odor and disposition. A visiting friend suggested that cornstarch would absorb the remaining oil and tar. Without too much thought (which we were long past anyway), she and Vaughn literally dumped an entire box of cornstarch on the exhausted, dozing animal. It did work, eventually, after many more hours of combing and brushing. The cat, bless her, survived to have many more adventures. She was about seven years old then. She lived to be twenty. Best of all, she never again (to my knowledge) crossed a road. - George |
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30 Dec 04 - 02:08 AM (#1367400) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Peace Georgeward: what a beautiful story and what a wonderful memory to have. Thank you for telling that. It's got a tear in my eye and a smile on my face. Bruce M |
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30 Dec 04 - 10:09 AM (#1367598) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Jeri George, was that Pyewacket? I never had to wash a cat. I never want to have to wash a cat. I know someone with a couple of Maine Coon cats. It was pissing down rain, and they wanted to go out side. I informed the cats, "You won't like it!" Their owner explained they loved the rain and I could let them out, which I did. These monster furballs came back a while later with the outer layer soaking wet and the fluffy cat 'down' underneath dry as a bone. I don't know that this is pertinent to the discussion as neither one of them appeared to have used any 'product'. I can't say for sure, though. |
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30 Dec 04 - 11:42 AM (#1367665) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: JohnInKansas Based on long experience and many tales when daddy was a barber, a "fine mineral oil" works much better than vegetable oil for road tar and for the occasional wad of chewing gum in the kid's hair. The difficulty is in finding a suitable "fine oil." Pre 1950 or so, many (US) barbers used a brand called "Southern Rose" that was essentially nothing but 3-In-1 oil with a Rose scent. Worked great for plastering down the 'do, for lubricating the clippers, and for removing road tar, bubble gum, and most other such from people's "fur." Often used in the garage instead of 3-In-1 because it was only about $1/quart and worked just as well. Obviously it didn't hurt the hair, since I had a lot more of it when I used that stuff than I do since I switched to other "goo." On the original subject of washing the cat, your expectations probably have more to do with it than the cat does. If you expect the cat to accept being bathed, and act accordingly, the cat will usually accept being bathed. If you expect trouble, and act accordingly, you'll usually have at least enough trouble to talk about for a few years later. It's just too bad it doesn't work as well with the children as with the cats. John |
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30 Dec 04 - 10:14 PM (#1367692) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: georgeward Bruce, thanks. It does make a good memory. Does much better as a memory than it did as an event, in fact ;-) And yes, Jeri, it was Pyewacket. John, I've no doubt mineral oil would have been a better choice, particularly a rose-scented variety. Dunno if the cat would have thought so. The cat, once we scented her rose, Kept the resident mouse on his toes. "Is it feline or flower ? Should I nibble or cower? What is a poor pest to suppose ?" |
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30 Dec 04 - 10:30 PM (#1367705) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Shanghaiceltic Lovely story Georgeward, when I get tarred and feathered I shall come to you..... |
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30 Dec 04 - 11:18 PM (#1367750) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: JohnInKansas I guess I should apologize for my last post. When I hit send, my browser never opened back on the main discussion thread, and I couldn't get back on the 'cat for a several hours. I finally gave up and took a nap. I Just found out the 'cat came back. OKay, I'm sorry, even though I'm not sure how I did it. Or maybe someone was giving the 'cat a bath???? John |
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30 Dec 04 - 11:36 PM (#1367762) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Bobert Well gol danged.... I just stuff 'um in da washing machine and wash 'um in warm water so they don't shrink up too bad... B~ |
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31 Dec 04 - 12:11 AM (#1367777) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: LadyJean All three of my indoor cats got out as I was unloading groceries. The orange tabby was easy to round up. He never goes too far from his bowl. The gray tabby had me chasing her around the neighbors yards, meanwhile the tortie disappeared down a black hole. Having rounded up the other two, I roamed the neigborhood hissing sssspsssspsssspsssspsss. It's how I call them to breakfast, and she knows it means food. I looked for two hours, and didn't find her. I was up at first light in the morning to look and hiss some more. After two more hours, I found her, on my back porch, glaring at me as much as to say, "You expect me to come when I'm called." I had only small regrets as I picked her up by the scruff of the neck and carried her back to the house. TORTIE CATS SHOULD COME WITH WARNING LABELS!!!!!!! |
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31 Dec 04 - 07:56 AM (#1367973) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Dead Horse Tumble dryers are OK if set on a low heat, but NEVER EVER PUT A CAT THROUGH THE MANGLE !!!! |
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31 Dec 04 - 08:11 AM (#1367977) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Peace The washing machine is a bit much, IMO. However, if you do it the old-fashioned way--with a tub and scrub board--wear very heavy work gloves. And a face mask And a--just wear goaltender hockey gear and ya should be OK. |
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31 Dec 04 - 12:20 PM (#1368226) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: GUEST Our old cat never cleaned its neck! My dad had the bright idea of pouring sardine oil on the poor things neck to encourage it to clean itself. It didn't work. |
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31 Dec 04 - 02:56 PM (#1368368) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: GUEST,leeneia Joking aside, if my cat ever needed a bath, I would pay the vet's staff to do it. Some expenses are worth it. As for cats getting in tar or being doused with detergent - pet cats should be kept inside your house. Cats that go outdoors can get wicked diseases (feline leukemia, feline "HIV", giardia, etc), they can get hit by cars, they get fleas and tapeworms, and they kill precious, dwindling song birds something terrible. To the person who commented on fleas in bedding, etc - there are new flea preventatives such as Frontline which you apply to the back of the cat's neck every few months. They are wonderful. |
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31 Dec 04 - 03:54 PM (#1368410) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Megan L Our cat got an unintentional bath when she was a kitten. When we were first married i had an old hoover twin tub which i would drag out into the yard on warm days and spend the day tipping loads from washer to spinner. i had gone in to answer the phone and carefull put the washer lid downafter a few moments i heard terrible yowls. Racing outside i found one mad as hell cookie trying to claw her way out of the tub thankfully the next load waiting for the tub was towels so drop towel on head and grab resulting bundle dropped her on the ground and stood well back. she sat on the roof and skoweled at me till i put the machine away. |
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31 Dec 04 - 08:03 PM (#1368540) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: The Fooles Troupe More good advice can be found in that old book "Washing Your Cat" by Claude Balls. |
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31 Dec 04 - 08:09 PM (#1368553) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Peace I thought of a really safe way to wash the kitty. Strap it to the roof of your car and then go through a car wash--the kind with the automatic brushes. That will get Alphonse as clean as a whistle. |
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31 Dec 04 - 08:10 PM (#1368556) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Peace Think waterpark here. |
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31 Dec 04 - 08:20 PM (#1368562) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: The Fooles Troupe That's one way to keep the cat away from the car brucie... |
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31 Dec 04 - 08:33 PM (#1368567) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: ranger1 I once had a cat that I didn't get along with particularly well. We kind of ignored one another, except at dinnertime. I discovered one day that we had suddenly acquired a flea circus and had to bathe both the cat and the dog. The dog is never particularly happy being bathed, but he humors me and just sits in the tub giving me the "I'm such a good dog, why are you being sooo mean to me?" look. The cat was a different story. However, much to my surprise, claws were never unsheathed. She did, however, squirt out of my hands like a watermelon seed once she was soaped, and escaped under the bed, behind the couch, in the bathroom closet behind the hot water heater, etc. And JohninKansas is right about the shower bit. Other than mewing piteously, she never lacerated any portion of my naked anatomy. Guess she somehow knew that I was trying to help. |
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31 Dec 04 - 08:47 PM (#1368572) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Richard Bridge All together now: Am, G, F, E, THe cat came back the very next day.... |
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01 Jan 05 - 01:14 AM (#1368665) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Bob Bolton G'day all, Foolestroupe's tale of some 30+ posts above suggests that the garbage bin method acquired some "official/veterinarian" status, here in Australia. Something like a decade, or so, back we had a black & white female cat of independent nature and strong hunting proclivities ... and Sydney was suffering a flea plague - and she came home with a very representative sample of Sydney fleas. The vet said we would have to give her a good bath in a flea mixture ... and suggested I mix a measured quantity with slightly warm water, up to about 70 mm / 3" depth, in a plastic garbage bin ... strategically placed a metre, or so, from the back door (in our case, a covered laudry area. Thus prepared, I was to grab the cat, drop her in and clip down the lid. Then, after giving the bin a few vigorous shakes, open the back door with one hand ... and gently unlatch the nearest side of the lid .. dive indoors - and firmly shut the door! This worked well - as we watched through the flyscreened upper door, she heard the latch move - probed the lid with one vey claw-laden paw ... then burst out, spluttering, hissing, shaking and swinging claws in every direction. The door was shut, the windows closed and no entry to the house possible - so she reluctantly retired to the highest spot available ... the top of an old warbrobe - now used for storage in the laundry ... upon which 3 green plastic garbage bags stored the white plastic foam beads from a couple of old beanbags ... now retired after their '70s/'80s vogue. Once she mangaged to shake / wipe / lick herself as dry as possible, she clearly decided that these bags had retributive potential ... ... and I spent the rest of the day devising a selective "Foam-Bead Retrieval Vacuum System" to return a few million little white beads to a new set of un-shredded garbage bags ... ! Regards, Bob |
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01 Jan 05 - 04:02 AM (#1368699) Subject: RE: BS: Washing the cat.......... From: Shanghaiceltic 'The Cats Revenge' By Pawlestyrene Clawed Balls |