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BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal

30 Dec 04 - 10:51 PM (#1367729)
Subject: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Jerry Rasmussen

A recently discovered personal memo revealed G.W.'s plan to make the use of the word "Dang" illegal, considering it to be the most dangerous and insidious of swear words. Anyone caught using that word after January 1, 2005 will be forced to stand in the public square and say "I love Compassionate Conservatives" 100 times.

If "dang," can "golley gee-whillikers" be far behind?

Dang!

Say it while you can..

Jerry


30 Dec 04 - 11:05 PM (#1367741)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Bobert

You sure about that one, Jerry?

Howz about "golley gee"? Hope it isn't on the radar as well. I mighyt just have to leave the danged country afterall...

Bobert


30 Dec 04 - 11:31 PM (#1367760)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Rapparee

Dad gum? Sam Hill? You betcha?

Why, the Idaho Legion won't have anything to say at all, at all.


31 Dec 04 - 12:39 AM (#1367790)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: DougR

Hilarious. I hope Amos sees this thread so he can add it to his archive. :>)
DougR


31 Dec 04 - 12:41 AM (#1367793)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: LadyJean

I expect jeez louise will follow.


31 Dec 04 - 12:46 AM (#1367799)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Peace

If it does, LadyJean, Colonel Potter on "MASH" reruns will get beeped. That was one of his expressions; it's one of mine, too. But I'm in Canada, so gosh ding it ain't much they can do to me here, yet.


31 Dec 04 - 04:05 AM (#1367859)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Ebbie

Dang.


31 Dec 04 - 04:10 AM (#1367862)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Georgiansilver

From the U.K perspective..I guess all I can say is "Golly gosh old chaps, that's not cricket eh"?
Best wishes.


31 Dec 04 - 04:45 AM (#1367878)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: dianavan

Gol dangit!


31 Dec 04 - 04:46 AM (#1367879)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: dianavan

Is that double jeopardy?


31 Dec 04 - 05:16 AM (#1367893)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: John MacKenzie

Apropos of Sherman Potter, what will happen to the expletive 'mule muffins'?
Giok


31 Dec 04 - 06:39 AM (#1367932)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: RangerSteve

Glorioski! What's this country coming to? It gets sillier all the time. What about "heck", "darn", "cripes"?

I guess my favorite: "Suffering Bald-headed Christ!" will get me the death sentence.


31 Dec 04 - 06:40 AM (#1367933)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: kendall

Whale oil beef hooked!


31 Dec 04 - 06:46 AM (#1367938)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: rumanci

I'd just better keep quiet all round from now on *bg*


31 Dec 04 - 06:49 AM (#1367940)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Peace

Rumanci,

You're gettin' awfully close with that 'just better' thing. Awfully close.


31 Dec 04 - 06:51 AM (#1367942)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: rumanci

Dang !!!!!


31 Dec 04 - 08:23 AM (#1367985)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Bobert

Upon second thoughts, I've spent the night filling up mason jars with "dangs" and have buried them way back in the woods where the dang-patrols will never look. Best me and the Wes Ginny Slide Rule have it figured is that I've got enough of 'um stashed up there to last until '08 when even Diebold won't help these danged crooks hold power...

Danggadee gangdadee, dangdadee, dang, dang it...

Bobert


31 Dec 04 - 09:16 AM (#1368016)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: maire-aine

Whatever you say, say nothing... link to lyrics

Maryanne


31 Dec 04 - 09:30 AM (#1368030)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Rapparee

The Idaho Legion is wrought up over this that over half of 'em are sober this morning. Just before he rolled over and went back to sleep, Slowdraw said to me, "I'm all wrought up over this here dang thing." Heck even told me he figgered that he'd have to go change his name; he's thinkin' about changing it to "Poopsie", only Poopsie McGurk threatened ta "bust him up like a saloon" if he did. Since Poopsie McG is six feet six and bends railroad rails (by hand) for curves on the Union Pacific's track, Heck wasn't about to cross her and he's now thinkin' about the name "George".

Now, just because over half the Legion is sober don't mean that they're functional. The hangovers are monumental. Elgin, for instance, was weaned on Rondyvoo Whiskey (which is also an excellent explosive and tar remover), was last known to be sober when he was six years old.

Anyway, they're runnin' around in all directions, saddlin' horses, sharpenin' knives, puttin' on band-aids, unsaddlin' horses, tryin' to find their pants, tryin' to put on their pants, and jist generally raisin' a dang ruckus.

I hope that this gets settled right quick before somebody really gits hurt. Them Legionaires ain't the toppest of hands with sharp things.


31 Dec 04 - 09:43 AM (#1368041)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Jerry Rasmussen

Criminently!

My Father, who I suspect swore like a trooper around his drinking buddies (who could peel Bobert and Amos's wallpaper off the wall) never swore at home. The most foul-mouth he ever got was to say "Gol!" I picked that one up over the years, and still use it to this day.

And when I'm really angry, I might just let a Gol Dang! slip out.

Maybe dag nabbit will be alright..

Jerry


31 Dec 04 - 09:48 AM (#1368051)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Rapparee

Don't forget "By The Great Horn Spoon!" and "Great Ceasar's Ghost!" and "Holy Moley!" (which derives from "The Wind In The Willows") and "Goodness Gracious!" and, of course, "Oh, 'shaw!"


31 Dec 04 - 10:34 AM (#1368107)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Jerry Rasmussen

And for women, there's always "Oh, fiddle!" A variant on fiddle dee dee!

Jerry


31 Dec 04 - 10:53 AM (#1368123)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Amos

Pish-tush and holy moley! Bush ain't gonna take MAH swearing rights away no how!! The Great Tradition of American Sailors will rise up in arms and castrate huim where he lies iffen he pulls that bullpuckey, deedy do!!

A


31 Dec 04 - 11:38 AM (#1368171)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Raedwulf

{Evil Grin} Wouldn't it be better if he made 'Dung' illegal? Given that all he ever talks is complete... ;-) {/Evil Grin}

R

P.S. I'm UK so *%$£ the CIA.

P.P.S. {innocently} Is it true that the only way the CIA can recruit Intelligents (No, no typo...), or ladies, these days is by recruiting Criminals? {/innocently}


31 Dec 04 - 12:23 PM (#1368234)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Bill D

now, philosophically trained as I am...*grin*...MY attention was focused on the first line:

"A recently discovered personal memo revealed.." ...... by whom?..and where?..etc...etc...

please note that even if 'dang' is banned, there will still be plenty of its past tense available.


31 Dec 04 - 12:36 PM (#1368255)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Jerry Rasmussen

To dang or not to dang... now that is REALLY the question.

Jerry


31 Dec 04 - 12:40 PM (#1368259)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Bill D

maybe Bush just wants to remove the only recourse for atheists who need eternal punishment.....being 'danged to heck'...


31 Dec 04 - 12:45 PM (#1368264)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Jerry Rasmussen

Kiss Blue Moon by the Marcels goodbye// that opening bass line, da ding, da ding, da dang, da dang, da dong, da dong.. Maybe it could be changed to da gish, da gish, da gosh, da gosh..

Jerry


31 Dec 04 - 02:04 PM (#1368326)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: dianavan

Golly, gee wizzakers! I'd better watch my language or I'll be in big trouble for darn sake!


31 Dec 04 - 02:08 PM (#1368331)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Amos

Darn it, Jerry! Now ya got that bass loop running through my head!! "Blue,blue,blue,blue moon....diddy dang dong dang blue blue blue blue moon.....". You just had ter, dincha?? LOL!


A


31 Dec 04 - 05:21 PM (#1368460)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Bert

This IS a joke isn't it Jerry? Surely that Yebnel Sharmoota who thinks it's OK to kill Iraquis isn't going to be upset by a mere Dang!!!


31 Dec 04 - 05:26 PM (#1368463)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Jerry Rasmussen

Everything about Bush is a joke, Bert. That's why something as absurd as this could even make anyone pause for a moment and think perhaps it's true.

One last DANG!

Jerry


31 Dec 04 - 05:56 PM (#1368481)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: GUEST,Frank

"Words are a dangerous place." "Lets make the pie higher".
"The literacy level of our children are appalling." "Human beings and fish can coexist peacefully." "Dictatorship is Ok as long as I'm dictator." "Is our children learning?" "....the gynocologists spreading their love in the country."

"Dang!"

Frank


31 Dec 04 - 07:03 PM (#1368516)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Don Firth

Well . . . PIFFLE!!

Don Firth


31 Dec 04 - 08:10 PM (#1368555)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: GUEST

Geschatzer Himmelveis!


01 Jan 05 - 12:05 AM (#1368649)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: dianavan

Whats the friggin the matter with dang? Sheesta Louise! You'd think nobody knows how to properly express themselves. Jiminy Cricket! Whats this world coming to?


01 Jan 05 - 01:51 AM (#1368678)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Jerry Rasmussen

Maybe Bush is trying to turn us into Girlie-men?

Jerry


01 Jan 05 - 12:10 PM (#1368754)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: GUEST,Frank

At least intellectual girlie-men. Book burning can be metaphorical as well as physical.

Remember that Bush's chief philosopher is Jesus who is defined by Falwell, Robertson, and probably Mel Gibson.

Frank


01 Jan 05 - 12:58 PM (#1368782)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Jerry Rasmussen

Jesus is defined by the bible.

Dang!

There I said it! What is that moving in the shadows?

Jerry


01 Jan 05 - 01:04 PM (#1368788)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Cluin

Dang?

Isn't that the sound your Liberty Bell makes since they've been trying to muffle it?


01 Jan 05 - 01:12 PM (#1368792)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Jerry Rasmussen

Dang dong, the which is dead?

Jerry


01 Jan 05 - 04:32 PM (#1368934)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Don Firth

"Well, criminintlies, Uncle Jack! What're we gonna do now?"

That goes back to the Thirties and Forties. Radio show, Jack Armstrong, the All-American Boy, sponsored by "Wheaties, the Breakfast of Champions." It isn't one of George Carlin's (FCC's)list of forbidden words, but it probably will be one of the other George's. No bloody sense of history!

Don Firth

P. S. I assume this is all a joke. . . ?


01 Jan 05 - 04:52 PM (#1368942)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: dianavan

Good golly, Miss Molly! If 'dang' if Bush has the power to make words illegal, does that mean he also has the power to send us to hell in a hand basket?

Why a hand basket? Where did that come from, anyway?

Seems like the Bush admin. is doing their best to create hell on earth as it is. I guess war is what you get when you think that paradise can only exist in heaven. Especially when both sides think the same way.

Dang, I wish they could see the light and stop dwelling in darkness and despair.


01 Jan 05 - 06:23 PM (#1368997)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Raedwulf

hell in a hand basket

Seemingly,

"This phrase, meaning "to deteriorate rapidly", originated in the
U.S. in the early 20th century. A handbasket is just a basket with
a handle. Something carried in a handbasket goes wherever it's going
without much resistance.

James L. Rader of Merriam-Webster Editorial Dept. writes: The
Dictionary of American Regional English [...] records 'to go to
heaven in a handbasket' much earlier than [...] 'hell,' which is not
attested before the 1950s. The earliest cite in our files is from
1949 [...]. 'In a handbasket' seems to imply ease and and speed
[...]. Perhaps part of the success of these phrases must simply be
ascribed to the force of alliteration. DARE has a much earlier
citation for another alliterative collocation with 'handbasket'
(1714), from Samuel Sewall's diary: 'A committee brought in
something about Piscataqua. Govr said he would give his head in a
Handbasket as soon as he would pass it.' I suspect that 'to go to
hell in a handbasket' has been around much longer than our records
would seem to indicate."


01 Jan 05 - 07:20 PM (#1369034)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Once Famous

The Roger Miller song "Dang me" is a pretty good tune.


01 Jan 05 - 08:04 PM (#1369062)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Jerry Rasmussen

Reminds me of a childhood buddy whose Mother (who didn't even let him live with, for Pete's sake... or his.) My friend got into the habit of saying "Jeepers," which she took to be a short-hand version of Jesus, and thus was swearing. He was forbidden to say Jeepers. (Apparently she didn't like the song Jeepers Creepers, either.) So, he followed her lead and shortened it to "jeeps!" It was one of more exotic exclamations of my friends (and it had never occurred to him that Jeepers was a slang word for Jesus.)

Bush hasn't invented anything. It's been around forever. He's just trying to institutionalize it.

And NO, there was no private memo...

Dang, you folks is gullible..

Jerry


02 Jan 05 - 12:56 AM (#1369177)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Kaleea

Isn't "dang" the beginning of dangerous? Does this mean that when dang is forbidden, danger & all dangerous things will be forbidden too? That could be something if all dangerous things are forbidden such as politicians who lie, & bunjie jump, visit troops in war zones, ride in dangerous parades, go to the theatre where any old evil-doer can shoot them, drop bombs, make deals with communists to tear down walls, . . .


02 Jan 05 - 06:52 AM (#1369258)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: Billy Weeks

If I were a bell I'd go ding blank ding blank dong.


03 Jan 05 - 08:25 AM (#1369938)
Subject: RE: BS: Bush to make 'Dang' illegal
From: JennyO

Great minds, Martin! I was reading through the thread and thinking - Dang me, nobody has said anything about that song. I must post some of it.

Then you mentioned it, so here are the words, complete with sound effects:

Dang Me: Roger Miller.

Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, ba, boop, boom, boom.
Ba, boo, ba, boom;
Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, boom.

Well, here I sat high, getting ideas.
I ain't nothing but a fool to live like this.
Out all night, an' running wild,
Woman sitting home with a month old child.

Dang me, dang me,
They ought to take a rope an' hang me.
High, from the highest tree:
Woman would you weep for me?

Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boo, bum.
One more:
Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boo, bum.

Just sittin' round drinkin' with the rest of the guys:
Six rounds bought, and I bought five.
I spent the groceries and half the rent,
An' like 14 dollars and 27 cents.

Oh, dang me, dang me,
They ought to take a rope an' hang me.
High, from the highest tree:
Woman would you weep for me?

Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boo, bum.
One more:
Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boo, bum.

They say roses are red, and violets are purple,
An' sugars sweet an' so is maple syrple.
An' I'm the seventh out of the seven sons.
My daddy was a pistol: I'm a son of a gun.

I said dang me, dang me,
They ought to take a rope an' hang me.
High, from the highest tree:
Woman would you weep for me?

Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, ba, boop, boom, boom.
Ba, boo, ba, boom;
Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, boom.