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BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.

30 Jan 05 - 07:43 PM (#1393740)
Subject: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Shanghaiceltic

Damn that vasectomy I could have won a Porsche!

Will they dope test the sperm if they do win. LOLROTFF!


Big sperm race is staged on German reality TV

Luke Harding in Berlin
Sunday January 30, 2005
The Observer

After Big Brother and Jungle Camp, Germans can tune in to a TV reality show this week that breaks new ground in trashiness ... Sperm Race. Twelve men will compete against each other to see which one of them has the 'fastest' sperm.
The contestants, who include two German celebrities and a health freak, begin by donating sperm in a clinic, say the programme's producers, Endemol.

The sperm will then be frozen and sent to the company's studio in Cologne, where the sperm will 'race' towards an egg - lured by a chemical that encourages them across the finishing line. Three doctors, including a gynaecologist, will be on hand to make sure the sperm behave correctly, while cameras will record it all.

As well as laying claim to the title of Germany's most fertile man, the winner will also be given a suitably German reward, a red Porsche.

Endemol Germany's president, Boris Brandt, denied yesterday that Sperm Race represented a new low point in dumbed-down TV. He claimed that the show had a serious scientific purpose. 'Sperm Race is serious. Fertility is a big thing in Germany,' he told Germany's Bild newspaper.

'About 1.8 million German men are unable to have children because they suffer from poor sperm. And there are disappointed girlfriends and wives, as well as parents who wait in vain for grandchildren.'

Brandt, whose company is responsible for the German Big Brother , said the cameras would not follow the contestants into the cubicles when they donated sperm.


30 Jan 05 - 07:45 PM (#1393743)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: wysiwyg

And it's Wiggly coming strong now.....

~S~


30 Jan 05 - 07:46 PM (#1393744)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Bert

Hmmm. The Master Race?


30 Jan 05 - 08:00 PM (#1393754)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Rapparee

I think that the cameras should follow them into that little booth....


30 Jan 05 - 11:58 PM (#1393911)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Shanghaiceltic

I think the camera should be in the booth too, just to prevent sperm substitution, never know people might be trying too hard to win and put in some supersperm specially trained on a sperm track with little eggs racing round on a circuit much like a greyhound race!

Come to think of it does greyhound sperm resemble human?


31 Jan 05 - 12:05 AM (#1393914)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: GUEST,ragdall

Will all the sperm be racing for a single ovum?

If so, how will they know which is which?
Will each be wearing a little jersey with a number on it?


31 Jan 05 - 10:39 AM (#1394293)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Bert

He's great on the flat but no good over the sticks!


31 Jan 05 - 12:23 PM (#1394399)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Amos

What an unbearable subject. Inconceivable.

"Five million sperm, and you were the best of the lot???"

LOL!


A


31 Jan 05 - 12:47 PM (#1394432)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Bert

Can't you hear that TV show right now playing The William Tell Overture.

Dum diddy dum diddy dum diddy dum.


31 Jan 05 - 01:08 PM (#1394448)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Amos

Go, little spermy, swimmer swimmer...
Swim til they all declare you Winner
Don't stop twitching 'til you make it
Even though your reward's a fake, it
Still means you're tops, as you well know!
Go little Spermy, go!!


31 Jan 05 - 01:11 PM (#1394454)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Rapparee

I want to see them all lined up in the starting gate.


31 Jan 05 - 05:17 PM (#1394775)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Bert

They're OFF!


31 Jan 05 - 07:21 PM (#1394962)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Shanghaiceltic

Could this become an Olympic event? I want to see them carry their national flag around a petri dish.


31 Jan 05 - 07:33 PM (#1394984)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Bill D

learning the ropes

*grin*

what happens to the losers


31 Jan 05 - 07:40 PM (#1394996)
Subject: RE: BS: It's Helmut's thats first over the line.
From: Amos

Wow!!Talk about Conservation!!That's what Bush and Rove should be doing. At least they'd get some recognition for their Jacking off.

A