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11 Feb 05 - 12:15 PM (#1405978) Subject: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: GUEST,Wolfgang There are some protests that make me laugh only about the protesters even if I usually take them and their aims serious. This is one such situation. The small zoo in the not so big German town of Bremerhaven has a small group of Humboldt penguins. This species is rather rare and therefore the zoos have a world wird breeding program. In Bremerhaven they happen to have more males than female penguins and so it happened (not too rare in the animal kingdom) that they have three homosexual penguin pairs. They breed (stones) and seem to like each other as far as one can see. Now the zoo imports six Swedish female penguins to see whether the males can be induced to breed eggs and not stones. The zoo thought nothing much of that and published this under the usual news from the zoo. Now happened what the zoo director never could have thought of. Gay groups from all over Germany and Austria vehemently protest this idea and flood the zoo by phone, fax and mail with this protest. The idea of the zoo never was to separate the homosexual pairs but just to offer a wider choice next spring, when the yearly pair bonding happens. I've not read about any feminist protests yet about this breeding program. Wolfgang |
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11 Feb 05 - 12:22 PM (#1405980) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Wesley S Frank Zappa had a song called "Penguins in Bondage" - perhaps playing that song for the little critters will inspire them to action. More Penguin Porn !!! |
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11 Feb 05 - 12:33 PM (#1405994) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: jacqui.c They're obviously very sensitive little souls (the gay groups - not the penguins). Maybe they're scared that if it works the government will want to try the same trick on them! |
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11 Feb 05 - 12:51 PM (#1406019) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Rapparee Gay people lay eggs and can be fooled with stones??? I didn't know that!! |
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11 Feb 05 - 12:57 PM (#1406030) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Blissfully Ignorant The pengiuns might be bi, it's only fair to throw a few chicks(ahem) into the colony to see if they hit it off... |
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11 Feb 05 - 12:59 PM (#1406033) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: McGrath of Harlow Surely it's up to the penguins to decide this kind of thing for themselves. Anyway, how do they know some of the female penguins might be lesbians? I think penguins must be remarkably clever to be able to tell the difference anyway. |
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11 Feb 05 - 02:12 PM (#1406136) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Amos This is excellent. If it works on humans, that they can be fooled with stones, perhaps we can use recycled kidney stones. Some of them are the right size and there is already an industry for recovering them at great expense; they serve no other valuable purpose and using them for this purpose would save the natural environment and ensure that those fooled by the stones are definitively depleted fromt he gene opool. Many values for sucxh a small change. Write your Congressman!! A |
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11 Feb 05 - 02:17 PM (#1406147) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Sorcha ROF!!! |
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11 Feb 05 - 02:26 PM (#1406165) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: GUEST,MMario Amos - what fabric are you p;anning to recover the kidney stones with? Why not just uyse slip covers - that would allow them to be washed. |
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11 Feb 05 - 02:33 PM (#1406183) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: McGrath of Harlow I think that'd fool most egg-laying humans. |
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11 Feb 05 - 04:58 PM (#1406330) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: wysiwyg Perhaps the protestors would prefer the apparent alternative-- involuntary sperm harvesting and artificial insemination? The sheep I've seen this done on seemed to enjoy the electronic probe that causes the sperm to, uh, how do I say this delicately-- shoot across the room?! :~) ~Susan |
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11 Feb 05 - 05:06 PM (#1406345) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Peace The first sperm in semen ejaculated by a human travels at approximately 45 km per hour. Piece of trivia that might interest folks. |
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11 Feb 05 - 05:10 PM (#1406350) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Rapparee Folks...more than that recent "reality TV sperm race" -- THIS is the real thing! |
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11 Feb 05 - 05:23 PM (#1406363) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Cluin Thanks, brucie. That explains a lot. |
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11 Feb 05 - 05:25 PM (#1406366) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Peace Gives new meaning to the expression, "Come quickly!" |
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11 Feb 05 - 05:32 PM (#1406374) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Cluin And "I tried to warn you..." |
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11 Feb 05 - 07:31 PM (#1406540) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Liz the Squeak What's that in miles and where can I get a good cleaner? LTS |
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11 Feb 05 - 07:32 PM (#1406544) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Peace 30 mph. |
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11 Feb 05 - 07:35 PM (#1406547) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Bunnahabhain 45 KMH, call it 25 MPH, but if you meant miles, then we'd have to know a few things we really don't want to... And surely if it goes that far, then it's not you who need the cleaner! |
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11 Feb 05 - 11:27 PM (#1406782) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Kaleea Some people have too much time on their hands, er, uh, have too much free time in their lives. |
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11 Feb 05 - 11:34 PM (#1406788) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Peace It goes FFFFFFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSTTTTTTT. |
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11 Feb 05 - 11:45 PM (#1406800) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Little Hawk That is a very funny story, Wolfgang, and it serves to illustrate precisely the sort of ludicrous behaviour that can arise when people who see themselves as perpetual "victims" have decided that their particular victimization obsession is relevant to not just some situations in society...but EVERY situation! This is a case of being a crank, a fanatic, a pest...and it's quite common nowadays on the part of groups of people who feel that they are victims of societal prejudice. It's also called having a big "chip on the shoulder". If there isn't a REAL case of prejudice out there to protest, by golly, they just look around and find a false one to get all up in arms about. I wonder if the penguins are appreciative of the efforts of the protestors? :-) |
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12 Feb 05 - 04:11 AM (#1406963) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Les in Chorlton OK Little Hawk, maybe the protesters over-reacted a bit ....... we wouldn't do that would we? |
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12 Feb 05 - 10:38 AM (#1407169) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Charley Noble What is the marital status of these penguins? Surely there are several other interests groups that could join this debate. I was shocked to see some these penguins on national TV "doing their thing" the other night. I'm still recovering, as is the bedspread from the rusty nail I spewed across it. Well, it could have been red wine... Cheerily, Charley Noble |
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12 Feb 05 - 11:05 PM (#1407846) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: frogprince I always had the feeling you had to be a little...that way... to want to wear one of those tuxedo things... |
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13 Feb 05 - 12:37 PM (#1408182) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Little Hawk Never, Les, never. :-) |
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13 Feb 05 - 02:23 PM (#1408286) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: GUEST,leeneia LTS, to convert kilometers to miles, remember the phrase "Cut it in half and add some." Thus 45 kph converts to 25. (22.5 plus some) How are you feeling after your heart procedure? Full of vim and vigor? What is vim, anyway? |
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14 Feb 05 - 12:27 PM (#1409434) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Little Hawk It's the feminine aspect of vigour. Sort of like yin and yang. |
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14 Feb 05 - 01:24 PM (#1409493) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: GUEST,leeneia Yesterday a columnist had a column about stories that are Too Good to Be True - they are colorful items with a delicious twist, but unfortunately upon checking it turns out that there's nothing to them. This sounds like one of those stories. |
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14 Feb 05 - 09:30 PM (#1410008) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Charley Noble No, I saw the story on our ABC national news. Sad but true. Well, maybe not sad... Charley Noble |
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14 Feb 05 - 09:47 PM (#1410017) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: coldjam Poor things. Can't pass stones in peace...I say let's just continue the "sweaters for penguins" program, and leave the poor buggers alone. |
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15 Feb 05 - 12:17 AM (#1410130) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Bob Bolton G'day leeneia, ...The sum of your 'some' was not quite enough! 27.962468 mph (Hey! I'll settle 28 mph ... a mere 0.13% error.) Regards, Bob |
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15 Feb 05 - 12:51 AM (#1410145) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Amos Buffy Saint Marie enters stage right with a jumbo guitar which she strums with great authority. She sings with the strident demanding tones for which she is famous:
Buffy slips off her high stool and bows quietly to uproarious applause. Exit, stage left, followed by spotlight. A |
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15 Feb 05 - 10:38 AM (#1410442) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Wolfgang I had for a short time pondered to post this as a song writing challenge, but I skpped that idea when I realised that could not be done in a meaningful way. I was wrong. Wolfgang |
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15 Feb 05 - 11:55 AM (#1410537) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Fibula Mattock Penguin Cafe Orchestra could sort you out... |
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15 Feb 05 - 12:43 PM (#1410591) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: McGrath of Harlow I have a suspicion that the German sense of humour might be at work here. I don't mean that Wolfgang made it up, and it's been in all the papers and that - but I feel there might perhaps be an element of piss-taking on the part of the protestors and the zoo's press officer maybe.... Latest twist in the stories I've seen in the media is that, since the male penguins seem fairly set in their ways, they are bringing in a couple more male penguins who might be more interested in the females. I'm sure it's doing wonders for the zoo's attendance figures at a time of year when people don't nornmally go to the zoo much... |
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15 Feb 05 - 06:25 PM (#1411091) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Little Hawk Amos, really! Leave my beloved Buffy out of this, you miscreant... :-) |
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15 Feb 05 - 07:06 PM (#1411143) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Bobert Cop looks down the street and sees a guy with 10 penguins walking behind him... "Hey, Mister, take them penguins to a zoo..." Next day cop sees same man walking down the street with same 10 penguins, all wearing sun glasses... "I thought I told you to takew those penguins to the zoo?" Man says... "I did. Today I'm takin' them to the beach..." Nevermind Bobert |
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15 Feb 05 - 07:10 PM (#1411150) Subject: RE: BS: Gay protest penguin breeding program From: Little Hawk LOL! |