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30 Jun 05 - 09:24 PM (#1513494) Subject: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST,Clucker .... RSPCA's farmyard response unit have uncovered what they believe to be the first case of "Chicken Stringing" in the UK. Part time farm worker Giles Andrews described to the court how he had fed a string to a chicken, waited for it to pass through its digestive system and then fed that to a subsequent chicken. By the time he was apprehended there were six chickens attached to the length of string. Andrews claimed he was preparing for a historical re-enactment where rival villages would compete for the highest number of chickens on a string. Found guilty of animal cruelty Andrews asked for three cases of inflating a chicken with a bicycle pump to be taken into consideration. Sentencing was deferred pending medical reports..... |
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30 Jun 05 - 10:07 PM (#1513501) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST Gi-les Andrews had a string, Eee-I-eee-I-O...... |
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01 Jul 05 - 04:01 AM (#1513545) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST,Liz the Squeak Hmmm.... pictoral evidence might be a little more convincing, but hey, let's face it, there are worse things to do with a chicken...... LTS |
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01 Jul 05 - 04:15 AM (#1513548) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST,El Gato Due to supplementing their diet of poor defenceless birds and mammals domestic cats tend to suffer from worms, here is my favourite method of dealing with them. Get a piece of string about 10' long and tie a knot in it every 9", tie one end to a post about 3' off the ground, and tie a sardine on the other end. Feed this sardine to the cat and wait for nature to take its course. When the end of the string appears put on your rubber gloves, and grabbing this end quickly tie it to another post at the same height of 3'. By this time the cat should be clear of the ground and somewhat puzzled. You then grab the cat and run it it up and down the string for about 10 minutes, this should effectively rid your cat of worms! G.. |
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01 Jul 05 - 04:20 AM (#1513550) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST,Liz the Squeak - cat owned..... El Gato - two problems... 1. How do you do it with multiple cats? 2. How do you catch the second cat once the first has ripped your hand off? LTS |
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01 Jul 05 - 05:00 AM (#1513566) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST,El Gato You anaesthetise the first cat with a 3lb hammer, [just say "Here kitty time for your iron injection"] then grab another sardine from the tin for the next cat. It may be necessary to substitute leather gauntlets for the rubber gloves in this instance! G.. |
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01 Jul 05 - 08:02 AM (#1513587) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST Or you could just give the poor creature a worming tablet. Although, that's easier said than done... |
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01 Jul 05 - 08:20 AM (#1513591) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST,El Gato Not nearly so much fun either!! G.. |
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01 Jul 05 - 08:39 AM (#1513595) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST True :)Personally, i've always been rather patial to feline inflicted lacerations... |
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01 Jul 05 - 08:51 AM (#1513598) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST,Rapaire Oh, fer goodness sake! I thought this was going to be a recipe thread. Or maybe a game like biting apples tied to a string fastened to the ceiling (can't use your hands). Instead it's just a description of the way that Idahoans (never say "Idahoers"!) tether chickens during roundup. And chicken roundup in Idaho is a wonderful time! The vast herds, the chickenboys cutting capons, the stampedes, the horses, the smell of burning feathers around the branding fire...ah, the memories! |
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01 Jul 05 - 09:06 AM (#1513602) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST Weekday morning after drinkin' gin, Hey yo, chicken on a string! I'm up to six and I'm gonna win! Hey yo, chicken on a string! Got another 12 to add to the chain! Hey yo, chicken on a string! But only if the cops don't catch me again! Hey yo, chicken on a string! Chickens on a string on a Monday morning, Oh, what a wonderful sight to see, In one end then out the aft!, Sittin' there a'lookin' at a chicken on a string! Hi, ho, chicken on a string! Hey, ho, chicken on a string! Hi, ho, chicken on a string! Hey, ho, chicken on a string! |
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01 Jul 05 - 01:25 PM (#1513817) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: John MacKenzie Skippers in the wardroom tying knots Hi ho pussy on a string It's the best thick hairy string he's got Hi ho pussy on a string Pussy on a string on a Monday morning Oh what a terrible sight to see One knot forward and ten knots aft Puss cat reaming is a dying craft Hi ho pussy on a string Giok |
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01 Jul 05 - 01:41 PM (#1513835) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: Bill D herd of Elephants...1 mile of 2" hemp hawser... rent 'em for building demolition |
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01 Jul 05 - 04:11 PM (#1513969) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: GUEST WALL STREET JOURNAL JUNE 28, 2005
He Makes Slaughter DevicesTo Kill Birds Efficiently; |
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01 Jul 05 - 04:15 PM (#1513974) Subject: RE: BS: Chicken on a String? From: Donuel soap on a rope now chicken on a string How about Popes on a rope? |