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08 Nov 05 - 01:59 PM (#1600101) Subject: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Emma B On tonights (BBC) Six o'clock news.............. "Police in Sweden have ejected two rowdy drunks from an Old Peoples Home. The imposters were a moose and her calf; it seems they were suffering the ill effects of bingeing on fermented apples which had fallen from a tree in the homes grounds" - you couldn't make this stuff up! what about a song challenge? |
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08 Nov 05 - 02:04 PM (#1600104) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Sorcha Thank goodness they weren't drunken elephants! |
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08 Nov 05 - 02:09 PM (#1600106) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: GUEST Where's social services? Surely they aren't going to leave the calf with such an unfit mother. Some folks eh. |
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08 Nov 05 - 02:29 PM (#1600121) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: MMario oh drunken moose, oh drunken moose How lovely are thy antlers Oh drunken moose, oh drunken moose How lovely are thy antlers YOu only thought to eat for free the apples fallen from the tree Oh drunken moose, oh drunken moose How lovely are thy antlers. Oh drunken moose, oh drunken moose, they chased right out of the hoose Oh drunken moose, oh drunken moose, they chased right out of the hoose They say you were an unfit Mom, because you brought your calf along Oh drunken moose, oh drunken moose, they chased right out of the hoose |
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08 Nov 05 - 04:49 PM (#1600208) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: RichM Drunk elephants kill six people in India |
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08 Nov 05 - 05:04 PM (#1600212) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Kaleea My Grandad, raised by his Uncle Tom-the local U.S. Marshall, grew up on the border of Texas & Oklahoma during the tail end of wild west days & most likely saw all kinds of things. (His first vehicle was a horse.) In all seriousness, I once heard my Grandad say, "Never leave the makin's fer your still lyin' around where jist inybody cud find 'em. Leads t' all kinna troubles." |
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08 Nov 05 - 07:41 PM (#1600311) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Leadfingers I recall a Wild Life film about an Oasis in Southern Africa which included a sequence of 'Drunken' animals when the fruit fallen from the trees had fermented ! Elephants , Wart Hogs , Baboons and all sorts ! Hilarious !! |
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08 Nov 05 - 08:05 PM (#1600332) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Cluin Drunken moose rampaging through the house? Ho hum. Just another day around here. |
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08 Nov 05 - 10:13 PM (#1600416) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Bard Judith An ancient Swedish mother moose Went for a stroll one night. Her calf and she unearthed a tree With fruit of such delight As made their bovine hearts rejoice And caused them both to low, The seniors there were in despair, To see a calf in tow. The apples ripely boozy were, Of cider wildly stunk! A lowing moose out on the loose Is far worse when she's drunk. And so the law was soon dispatched To chase away the pair, That from their bar were driven far, But went without a care For full ten pints of apple ale Were sloshing round inside - So very loose were calf and moose, I wish I'd had their hide. The moral of this ballad is, If you are underage, Eat not of fallen apples lest Your seniors you enrage! |
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08 Nov 05 - 10:14 PM (#1600418) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Bard Judith Oh, and I couldn't resist this limerick (have no idea who the author was on this one - not me this time) There wos a young lady of Clyde Who ate rotten apples - an' died. Th' apples fermented Inside th' lamented And made cider inside 'er inside. |
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09 Nov 05 - 04:33 AM (#1600498) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Gurney I could see that MMario's song went to the 'Tannenbaum', but I couldn't pick Judith's. But do Moose (Meese?) have BOVINE hearts, deer? Cervidly they do! |
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09 Nov 05 - 07:36 AM (#1600567) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: *daylia* Sweet mama moose! This may sound corny Your looooong legs made him HUGE and horny But then he left you all forlorny With calf so small and sad But Serpent said "Who gives a hoot? Stick out that neck and eat this fruit!" What happened then is none too cute I blame the deadbeat dad. |
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09 Nov 05 - 12:18 PM (#1600729) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Bill D Sweden has a problem! |
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09 Nov 05 - 02:57 PM (#1600850) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: GUEST,Mooseman I have a feeling that the Mooses were maybe there because some of the old men had put hay out for them. Please remember the following song:- When I was a young lad I used to like girls, I'd play with their corsets and fondle their curls. 'Till one day, my lady I caught with some churl, Now you'd never get treated that way by a moose. Chorus Moose, moose, I likes a moose, I've never had anything quite like a moose. I've had lots of lovers, my life has been loose, But I've never had anything quite like a moose. Now when I'm in the mood for a very good lay, I go to my closet and get me some hay. I go to my window and spread it around. 'Cause moose always come when there's hay on the ground. Chorus... Gorillas are all right on Saturday night, Lions and tigers, they puts up a fight. But it's just not the same when you slam your caboose, As the feeling you get when you humps with a moose. Chorus I've done it with beasties with long flowing hair, I'd do it with snakes if their fangs were not there. I've done it with walrus, a monkey, and goose, But it's just not the same when you screw with a moose. Chorus Now that I am old and advanced in my years, I look back on my life and shed me no tears. As I sit in my chair with my glass of Matheus, Playing Hide-The-Salami with Melba the Moose. Chorus... |
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09 Nov 05 - 03:47 PM (#1600884) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Rapparee Ever see a hummingbird that's been at the fermented sugar water? You'll gain new appreciation for the adminition "Straighten up and fly right!" |
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09 Nov 05 - 05:36 PM (#1600961) Subject: RE: BS: A moose loose in the hoose From: Georgiansilver Guest Mooseman....it would appear that they like other things besides hay! Sad that the people there had to get them drunk first... |
