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BS: Here is your 30 day warning

01 Mar 06 - 08:35 AM (#1682142)
Subject: BS: Here is your 30 day warning
From: Donuel

Dear friends, (virtual acquaintences)

For the next carefree 30 days you will have an uninterupted opportunity to prepare for the US introduction of bird flu.

1. purchase and freeze poultry for later consumption
2. ask your doctor for tamiflu for early signs of flu (especially for children)
3. have a method to keep pets from injesting fallen birds and to dispose of bird carcass' safely.
4. Inform your schools to have assemblies to warn children from any contact with the numerous dead birds.
5. Have a supply of basic food and means to boil water in case the aquifer near you is contaminated by dead water fowl.

Remember the worst case scenario is matter of chance mutation of the virus within infected mammals.

Invest if you wish in commodities and bet options against chicken concerns. We have now banned all French fowl with more countries to come. In Bahamma half of the flamingo population has just died. As Spring arrives more migratory birds will be flying north from the infected regions. It may take as much as 4 months to reach New England.


Your 60 day warning.

The Atlantic ocean is already a firm one degree above normal so severe May storms are likely.

Your 90 day warning.

As the Iraq civil way expands beyonds its border, American bases will be more vulnerable. Desperation will lead to a defensive decision to use tactical weapons of the worst kind. Pakistan may lend its nuclear support.

Your 1 yr warning

Hit shows like the Aprentice and Lost will be canceled.


01 Mar 06 - 08:38 AM (#1682144)
Subject: RE: BS: Here is your 30 day warning
From: John MacKenzie

Well it's not all bad news then!
Giok


01 Mar 06 - 08:52 AM (#1682159)
Subject: RE: BS: Here is your 30 day warning
From: SINSULL

Got my hopes up. I thought baby bush was going to resign in 30 days.


01 Mar 06 - 08:54 AM (#1682164)
Subject: RE: BS: Here is your 30 day warning
From: Donuel

Here was my warning from 2 years ago regarding Iraq.

http://www.angelfire.com/md2/customviolins/aas0.gif


01 Mar 06 - 09:54 AM (#1682239)
Subject: RE: BS: Here is your 30 day warning
From: gnu

So, we should eat Chicken Little?


01 Mar 06 - 10:00 AM (#1682249)
Subject: RE: BS: Here is your 30 day warning
From: Stilly River Sage

I live on a creek where dead birds are a sign of West Nile Virus (though dead possums and skunks are a sign of traffic.)

The beef industry will be happy with this (as long as the chickens don't get too close to the cows).

SRS


01 Mar 06 - 11:13 AM (#1682301)
Subject: RE: BS: Here is your 30 day warning
From: Donuel

I saw a birdie in the sky
It fell to Earth I know not why
Was it bird flu made him die
or a hunter by and by

I heard a shot and then a cry
Captured Quail began to fly
Maybe Cheney's too damn high
Yep, he shot a lawyer in the eye

Cheney swore "I will not lie
after all I can't be tried
I love my Quail deep fat fried"
He clutched his heart and then he died.



Poetry for children by Dr.H 2006


01 Mar 06 - 11:26 AM (#1682317)
Subject: RE: BS: Here is your 30 day warning
From: Donuel

I f a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, and the bus is interrupted at a very last resort, and the access of the memory makes your floppy disk abort, then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash, and the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash, and your data is corrupted cause the index doesn't hash, then your situation's hopeless and your system's gonna crash!

If the label on the cable on the table at your house, says the network is connected to the button on your mouse, but your packets want to tunnel to another protocol, that's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall......

And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss, so your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse; then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang, 'cuz sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang.

When the copy on your floppy's getting sloppy in the disk, and the macro code instructions cause unwanted risk, then you'll have to flash the BIOS and you'll want to RAM your ROM, just quickly turn the darn thing off and run to tell your Mom!


01 Mar 06 - 12:32 PM (#1682379)
Subject: RE: BS: Here is your 30 day warning
From: Donuel

CCR

Doot Doot Dooo
bird flu in my backyard


03 Mar 06 - 08:45 AM (#1684284)
Subject: RE: BS: Here is your 30 day warning
From: Donuel

It took CNN less than 24 hours to refute the report that 150 Flamingos in the Bahamas suddenly died 2 days ago.

Yes they did die en masse, but it was not due to bird flu.
The actual cause of death however was not released.