|
21 Jul 06 - 10:46 AM (#1789102) Subject: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,Bob Coltman Posting here as an offshoot from the "Tie My Pecker To My Leg" thread. A few posts dealt with the immortal stanza reported in Randolph, Blow the Candles Out, completed with help from posters: Ass hole, ass hole, a soldier I would be, To piss, to piss, two pistols at my knee, Fuck you, fuck you, for curiosity, To fight for the cunt, to fight for the cunt, to fight for the cunt-er-y. It was noted that a British variant has To fight for the Queen's cunt, fight for the Queen's cunt, fight for the Queen's country. The stanza as it is could not be more perfect. Nevertheless my lady and I thought it would be nice if the song went on longer. So we stayed up late batting our brains over possible further verses. The following are our more or less lame results, put together with the original verse. - - - Bob Coltman A SOLDIER I WOULD BE Verse 1 traditional. Remaining verses c 2006 Bob Coltman Ass hole, ass hole, a soldier I would be, To piss, to piss, two pistols at my knee, Fuck you, fuck you, for curiosity, To fight for the cunt, to fight for the cunt, to fight for the cunt-er-y. A cock, a cock, a cockade cap I'll wear, A boob, a boob, a booby prize I'll bear, My come, my come, my cummerbund I'll tear, Jabbed by the prick, jabbed by the prick, jabbed by the prickly pear. My pee, my pee, my peevish face I'll show, A whore, a whore, a horrid fit I'll throw, My ass, my ass, my asthma all aglow, Gobbling piss, gobbling piss, gobb'ling pistachio. A dick, a dick, a dictator I'll be, Jack off, jack off, jack of all trades, that's me, That shit, that shit, that's itching horribly, Bit by the bum, bit by the bum, bit by the bumblebee. Ass hole, ass hole, a soldier all my days, With balls, with balls, with balsam fir sachets, My fart, my fart, my far trail I will blaze, And beat off the meat, beat off the meat, beat off the meter maids. Bugle call coda No one better harm me, while I am in the army, A cannon would alarm me, So pass me the parasol. I can't get it up, I can't get it up, I can't get it up this morn – ing, I can't get it up, I can't get it up, I can't get it up at all. ---- Ad lib until tired ---- |
|
20 Oct 12 - 04:06 AM (#3422950) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST One small thing....the last line of the first verse should read. "To fight for the old cunt,fight for the old cunt,fight for the old country". Cheers me dears. Stu from Bromley. |
|
20 Oct 12 - 06:18 AM (#3422979) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,.gargoyle Nicely done. Sincerely, Gargoyle I 'll present it at down downs this weekend. |
|
20 Oct 12 - 12:03 PM (#3423092) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: MGM·Lion Stu from Bromley ~~ "Should" is not a word to be used of a traditional song. You mean you prefer the version in which the first verse ends as you have quoted. There is no 'should' about it. ~M~ |
|
20 Oct 12 - 05:13 PM (#3423195) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST I remember it differently from my schooldays (c1968) Fuck you, fuck you, for curiosity, Ass hole, ass hole, a soldier I will be, To piss, to piss, two pistols at my knee, To fight for my cunt, to fight for my cunt, to fight for my cunt-er-y. Although it's very basic, it seems to make more sense that way as well. i.e. For the sake of curiosity I will become a soldier, and with two pistols will fight for my country. as opposed to: I will become a soldier, with two pistols. And, for the sake of curiosity will fight for my country. Other views may vary :) Cheers Nigel |
|
28 Mar 17 - 10:07 AM (#3847134) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,nerd hunter i like this |
|
25 Jan 18 - 06:54 AM (#3901655) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,Rose I remember it like this. Ass hole ass hole a shoulder went to war. Fuck you fuck you for curiosity. My cunt my cunt my country went to war fuck you fuck you for curiosity |
|
25 Jan 18 - 08:17 AM (#3901665) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: Lighter Bob Coltman's initial stanza appeared in the sub rosa anthology "Immortalia" in 1927. |
|
05 Feb 18 - 03:17 AM (#3903866) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST This is the version I heard in my youth: A sol- a sol- a soldier I would be For cu- for cu- for curiosity I fight for my coun- I fight for my coun- I fight for my coun-t-ry With a pis- with a pis- with a pistol on my knee... Cheers, z |
|
28 Jun 18 - 06:28 AM (#3933816) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,richi2011 My dad taught me the same song back in the 1970s, but it was slightly different. Here are the lyrics he taught me: Ass hole ass hole, a soldier in the army to piss to piss, two pistols at her side shit hole shit hole, she told me that she loved me fuck you fuck you, for curiosity. |
|
30 Aug 18 - 07:25 PM (#3947192) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,J Hadley This is what I heard in 1961, and the metre is better, it scans well. Fuck you, fuck you, for curiosity, Ass hole, ass hole, a soldier I will be, To piss, to piss, two pistols at my knee, my cunt, my cunt, my country I will free. |
|
30 Aug 18 - 07:46 PM (#3947196) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: Steve Shaw Bolton, 1968-ish: Arsehole, arsehole, a soldier I will be, Two piss, two piss, two pistols on my knee Fuck you, fuck you, for curiosity, I'll fight for the cunt I'll fight for the cunt I'll fight for the cunt-er-ee. |
|
14 Nov 18 - 07:35 PM (#3961693) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,F. J. Smith What I remember from my grandfather: A sol, a sol, a soldier I will be, Two pis, two pis, two pistols on my knee, I swear, I swear, I swear I will be true, Oh dam, oh dam, oh damsel I love you. Oh Hel, oh Hel, oh Helen will be mine, Oh dam, oh dam, oh damsel you’re divine, My grandfather passed away in 1972 and that’s all I can remember. |
|
29 Aug 19 - 02:17 PM (#4006422) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST After "Oh Hel, oh Hel, oh Helen will be mine, Oh dam, oh dam, oh damsel you’re divine" we have... "We went to bed, we went to bed, we went to Bedfordshire, Fuck you, fuck you, for curiosity, We had a shag, we had a shag, we had a shaggy dog, Fuck you, fuck you, for curiosity, Oh Hel, oh Hel, oh Helen will be mine, Oh dam, oh dam, oh damsel you’re divine... |
|
29 Aug 19 - 02:33 PM (#4006429) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: Steve Shaw And of course it's sung, at least to start with, to the opening doublet of Eine Kleine Nachtmusik before it turns militaristic for the fourth line. Mozart would have loved it. He was very much a bums, bellies and tits man, in between writing his sublime masterpieces. It's true I tell you! |
|
04 Mar 20 - 11:55 PM (#4037583) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,PTP THANKYOU for creating more of this dirty ditty! It was toos hort and your additions are welcome! |
|
05 Mar 20 - 03:42 AM (#4037597) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: Mr Red A GF once related her version which is under the umbrella of "Back of the Bus Songs" and it is where she sang it. I list it here song.mister.red/#50 There has been a thread in this parish on such songs. Back of the Bus thread Now to that thread to correct my sin of changing the URL without re-directs - it was early days. |
|
14 May 20 - 06:32 AM (#4052408) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,Tel The Wolf Cubs taught me (C. 1950) that the first line was A sod, a sod, a soldier I will be. But I like the other versions too. |
|
15 Mar 22 - 07:19 AM (#4138524) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,Cannibal Considering my memory of how I heard this wonderful ditty many years ago and some of the comments made here, I think it should go like this. Ass hole, ass hole, a soldier I will be, Fuck you, fuck you, for curiosity. Too pissed, too pissed, two pistols on my knee To fight for the Queens's cunt, fight for the Queen's cunt, fight for the Queen's country! I am sure we all appreciate the effort of Bob Coltman in contributing a few extra verses - may that tradition continue to enrich our cultural heritage! |
|
15 Mar 22 - 07:42 AM (#4138527) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: Lighter Mr. Red's first two lines go to the tune of "Marching through Georgia." |
|
08 Oct 23 - 10:03 AM (#4183227) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,Sarah The version I heard from my in-laws (natives of Leicester) goes like this: Shithole, shithole, she told me I should be Arsehole, arsehole, a soldier for the Queen To piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee To fight for my cunt, to fight for my cunt, to fight for my cunt-ta-ry (last line sung with a dramatic flair) |
|
08 Oct 23 - 10:03 AM (#4187441) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST,Sarah The version I heard from my in-laws (natives of Leicester) goes like this: Shithole, shithole, she told me I should be Arsehole, arsehole, a soldier for the Queen To piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee To fight for my cunt, to fight for my cunt, to fight for my cunt-ta-ry (last line sung with a dramatic flair) |
|
04 Mar 24 - 04:51 AM (#4198486) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST Back when I was in school (in the 1980s in Ahmedabad, India), our version said: "With piss, With piss, with pistols in my hand, With penis, with penis, with penicillin in the medical chest..." |
|
24 Apr 24 - 03:52 PM (#4201547) Subject: RE: Lyr Add: A Soldier I Will Be From: GUEST 2 pistols, to pistols by my side the fight for the old cunt, fight for the old cunt, fight for the whole country |