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04 Dec 06 - 06:26 AM (#1899452) Subject: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: scrimnet Can anyone help with this pse??? I remember a song once sung which contained the following.. ...Sister suzie's been aborted for the forty second time Cousin (brother ?) xxxx has been arrested for a homosexual crime. Fathers lost(?) his anal sphincture Mothers got a prolapsed womb And finishes... Yet we are not down hearted Neither are we up the spout Aunty Mabel has just farted Blown her arsehole inside out I think it may have been in a book called "Bawdy Barrack Room Ballads" I've done a search on the site andfound nothing. I think the tune was a variation on "She Was Poor But She Was Honest"... Thanks! |
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04 Dec 06 - 07:00 AM (#1899471) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: gnomad Try searching for "Life presents a dismal picture", I am fairly sure that is your first line. |
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04 Dec 06 - 09:32 AM (#1899599) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: The Vulgar Boatman And the tune is Deutschland uber alles.... |
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04 Dec 06 - 10:10 AM (#1899641) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: Midchuck Life at home is sad and dreary Listen to my tale of woe. Father has a bleeding rectum Mother has a leaky hole. Uncle Jeff has been deported For some homosexual crime, And the maid has been aborted For the forty-second time. ...is the way my college roommate sang it 40+ years ago. Peter. |
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04 Dec 06 - 10:13 AM (#1899647) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: Liz the Squeak It was in the 'Official Book of Bawdy Ballads' and if I knew who'd taken my copy of it, I'd be able to help you.... LTS |
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04 Dec 06 - 10:17 AM (#1899654) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: alanabit I should search this site. |
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04 Dec 06 - 11:07 AM (#1899703) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: Micca Life presents a dismal picture dark and mournful as the tomb Father has and anal stricture mother has a fallen womb in the corner sits Jemima never laughs and rarely smiles what a dismal occupation cracking ice for Grandpas piles brother Bill has been reported for a homosexual crime siter Jane has been aborted for the forty second time see the baby with his Mammy he is always having fits every time he coughs he vomits every time he farts he shits Thats as much as I can remeber just now |
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04 Dec 06 - 12:20 PM (#1899778) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: Snuffy It is in the DT as ALL THE WORLD IS DESOLATION Versions have been posted on Mudcat here, here, here, here, here, etc etc. And there seems to be as many tunes as versions |
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04 Dec 06 - 01:32 PM (#1899841) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: scrimnet Great!! Thanks everyone!! Micca has the nearest to my memory!! My Bawdy Book was nicked whilst I was in Switzerland as a not so innocent 14 yr old Scout!!! |
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04 Dec 06 - 07:56 PM (#1900123) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: Leadfingers Miles Wootten wrote a 'dodgy family' song back then ! Aunty was a witch . Uncle was a Vampire , Nephew was a changeling and Grandpa came out of Frankensteins Lab ! Good Stuff - MUST relearn it !! |
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05 Dec 06 - 11:02 AM (#1900598) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: Flash Company There is also one called 'My Word, How the Money Rolls In!' My Uncle packs durex in packets, And pierces each one with a pin, My Aunty does cut price abortions, My word, how the money rolls in! Tune of My Bonny lies over the Ocean. FC |
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05 Dec 06 - 04:00 PM (#1900912) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: Nigel Parsons Flash Company: Oh dear, how commercialism takes our songs away! I don't remember mention of Durex My Grandma sells cheap prophylactics And pierces the teat with a pin 'Cos Grandad gets rich from abortions My god how the money rolls in. My brother's a slum missionary, He saves the young ladies from sin. He'll save you a blonde for a guinea. My god how the money rolls in. My father's a Harley Street surgeon. With instruments long, sharp, and thin. he only does one operation. My god how the money rolls in. Rolls in, rolls in, My god how the money rolls in. (Rolls in) Rolls in, rolls in My god how the money rolls in. CHEERS Nigel |
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05 Dec 06 - 04:30 PM (#1900934) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: NightWing My two favorite verses are best to bookend the song:
My father makes book on the corner,
BB, |
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06 Dec 06 - 03:05 PM (#1901734) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: Kajikit Leadfinger wrote: Miles Wootten wrote a 'dodgy family' song back then ! Aunty was a witch. Uncle was a Vampire, Nephew was a changeling and Grandpa came out of Frankensteins Lab ! Good Stuff - MUST relearn it !! I'd love the words for this one! It sounds like it would go down a treat with the filkers... anyone? |
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06 Dec 06 - 03:44 PM (#1901781) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: Herga Kitty And what about, the "woe is me, shame and scandal in the family" calypso? Kitty |
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06 Dec 06 - 09:02 PM (#1902040) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: Joe_F One might also mention Oh, my name is Diamond Lily, I'm a whore in Piccadilly, And my father runs a brothel in the Strand, And my brother sells his arsehole To the guards in Windsor Castle -- We're the finest fucking family in the land. |
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09 Dec 06 - 12:28 AM (#1904222) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: John M. The song is "Diamond Lilly," "Tiger Lilly" or "The Finest Fucking Family in the Land". The tune universally(?) used is "The Road to the Isles". The UNCENSORED song is sung with a false Cockney accent (e.g. dropping "h"'s) by Oscar Brand on his "X" LP. The song goes back to WWII according to Les Cleveland's 1959 book _The Songs We Sang_. Les can be heard sing the song here: http://www.immortalia.com/mp3s/field-work/patrick-collection/les-cleveland/03%20-%20Tiger%20Lily%20%5BAka%20The%20Finest%20Fucking%20Family%5D.mp3 I have spent time accessing the relation the of "Finest Family" with "Life Presents a Dismal Picture" which is sometime sung to Deutland Uber Alles. |
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09 Dec 06 - 12:30 AM (#1904223) Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Naughty family song From: John M. I HAVEN'T spent time accessing the relation between "Finest Fucking Family" and "Life Presents a Dismal Picture". |