23 Dec 06 - 01:38 PM (#1917559) Subject: You can write songs about anything From: Bert As Alaska Mike said in another thread. So just for fun - What "anythings" have you written songs about? Lets see some variety!!!! Here's a few of mine... A Shopping Cart Plastic Flowers Stars and Snowflakes Leaving Muddy River Catfish Tumbleweeds Highway 202 Spare Time |
23 Dec 06 - 01:52 PM (#1917565) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Jerry Rasmussen An Old Blue Suit A Screen Porch Door A rooster A No-account dog A Ten Pound Radio Jerry |
23 Dec 06 - 05:36 PM (#1917730) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Uncle_DaveO Loving to make coffee Garden gnomes The "Box" That The "Cherry" Came In Trying to be a magician (I used to be one.) The "oppressed life" of a student at the University of Minnesota (1952) Dave Oesterreich |
23 Dec 06 - 06:08 PM (#1917756) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Crane Driver A one-legged rigger An early variety of canned meat Elephants' teeth The perils of borrowing someone else's horses Andrew |
23 Dec 06 - 06:23 PM (#1917763) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Leadfingers Some of us cant write songs about ANYTHING , and are reduced to stealing songs off you clever buggers !! So keep at it ! |
23 Dec 06 - 06:42 PM (#1917776) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: SharonA Hi, Bert! Great thread! (And may I say to the rest of the group, who are most likely unfamiliar with Route 202, that it is a nightmare-highway well worth writing about! But I have not done so... yet...) Just a few of the anythings I've written about are... Bobbing for apples C.R.S. Gepetto The fish of procrastination (i.e. the Shoulda-woulda-cuda) Butterfly ballots How fat I am The Vietnam War memorial in Washington DC Inflatable lawn ornaments A cat who breaks up a marriage The Bible's origins in myths How I hate choruses |
23 Dec 06 - 07:13 PM (#1917811) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: McGrath of Harlow Marmite Bin bags Malingering TV remote control Kipers Bogies (nasal) Christmas decorations Clones Flu |
23 Dec 06 - 08:40 PM (#1917881) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Joe_F Statistical mechanics |
23 Dec 06 - 09:08 PM (#1917896) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Rosebrook My bandmate is the writer in our trio - his recent subjects include: Losing his girlfriend to a woman who was met online The old dog on the porch You can find the B hanging out between the A and the C Genius, pure genius! Rose |
23 Dec 06 - 09:45 PM (#1917904) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Alaska Mike My Wife My Father My Brother My Daughter A young whaler's first kill The Alaskan Highway The 1964 Alaska Earthquake Snowshoeing Dog Sledding Christmas Moose Clipper Ships CSS Shenandoah Lost love Found love A Mexican Bandito Salmon Halibut Anniversary William Wallace Exploring Mars Andersonville A King Crab Talkeetna Mountains Flying in small planes Carhartt brand clothing Finding Gold Turnagain Arm of Cook Inlet Occupational advancement Friends and friendship My great grandparents immigration Guinness Porter Starvation and many more subjects which I can't think of at the moment |
24 Dec 06 - 09:14 AM (#1918101) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,ptsn1 anything, thats whats so cool about writing. http://www.myspace.com/wanabwriter |
24 Dec 06 - 09:47 AM (#1918113) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,Fred Bailey condoms fredbaileymusic.com |
24 Dec 06 - 10:28 AM (#1918138) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Bert Some good songs there Fred. |
24 Dec 06 - 05:12 PM (#1918349) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Howard Kaplan Porcupines injured by falling from branches; Water consumption by toilets and ranches; Sloths whose coarse fur wears away sloth moth wings -- These are a few of my song topic things. Socks that Goodwill may find hard to recycle; Nogies Creek bullfrogs (recorded by Michael); Circuits that pick up the phone when it rings -- These are a few of my song topic things. Toads that cross roads though endangered by lorries; Widow and knight from Boccaccio's stories; Slow loris sex, where the male hangs and clings -- These are a few of my song topic things. Nobel prize winners who studied the quantum; Bread-baking lessons, for those who might want 'em; Why one should sit on a chair when one sings -- These are a few of my song topic things. Dung beetles sent to eat shit in Australia; Webmasters' jargon and paraphenalia; Folks who use condoms when having short flings -- These are a few of my song topic things. Starfish described in a 5/4 march meter; Lions'-den Daniel, that great lentil eater; Jews speaking Greek under Syrian kings -- These are a few of my song topic things. Earthworm sex characterized with precision; How the moon formed in a giant collision, Bringing us solstices, autumns, and springs -- These are a few of my song topic things; Tools to look inside the colon; Barley-based strong drink -- If you want to browse through my song topic things, You're welcome to click this link: http://www.thrinberry-frog.com/SongSheets.htm |
26 Dec 06 - 02:46 PM (#1919289) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Bert I forgot one. "Momma Spit" |
26 Dec 06 - 05:02 PM (#1919364) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Scoville The Boxcar Preachers have one about microsurgical vasectomy reversal. |
26 Dec 06 - 05:04 PM (#1919365) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Sttaw Legend Carbide precipitation on the grain boundaries Hub caps Platting fog |
26 Dec 06 - 08:52 PM (#1919567) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,Bob.D. The perils of borrowing other people's tunes. |
26 Dec 06 - 08:55 PM (#1919569) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Peace Crabs. There are not many songs about crabs. |
26 Dec 06 - 09:13 PM (#1919581) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,gleaner You can write a song about Jews who don't turn the other cheek, as Kinky Friedman did, and have NPR's irony-challenged Scott Simon declare it racist. |
26 Dec 06 - 09:18 PM (#1919584) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Peace "Sixteen Thousand and Eight Legs" She was just a harmless little gal Eight legs and a tummy swell Few days later and her kids did dwell In my pubic hair Seemed to dance all through the night Do-si-do and alamand right Must have been a strange, strange sight In my pubic hair (more stanzas go here--I can't be arsed) If crabs were coins I would have riches To go along with all my itches But I killed the little sons of bitches In my pubic hair THE END |
26 Dec 06 - 09:24 PM (#1919590) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: bobad Crab Jubilee Crab Jubilee! Crab Jubilee! Crabs look so happy, so fancy and free! So graceful, so tasteful, So glad to be part of a wonderful Crab Jubilee! The crabs come a dancin' Up onto the land! They merrily waltz right into your pan! It's a joyous occasion. Something to see The crabs celebrating the Crab Jubilee! Chorus Crab Jubilee! Crab Jubilee! Sounds like death and dyin' to me! The oxygen's used, decomposing algae. So we can flee or die, that's Crab Jubilee! My buddies, the oysters cement themselves down. They're not built for moving around. So like all the critters that cannot swim far, When the oxygen drops, They die right where they are. So when the crabs leave the water, you know somethin's wrong !? We'd much rather stay down where we belong. So when life underwater can't be sustained..... Then we sadly depart as we sing this refrain. Chorus Water contains dissolved oxygen down here we breathe through our gills as we swim down in the mud under the bay bacteria decompose things every day then the oxygen drops, OH NO ! most of life stops, OH NO ! anoxia, OH NO where did the oxygen all go ? Crab jubilee! Crab Jubilee It sounds like death and dying to m.e It isn't a party. There's no cause for glee. It's sad to be part of a crab jubilee. Ye,s I hope there's no more crab jubilee. |
26 Dec 06 - 09:34 PM (#1919595) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,gleaner Epitaph on a Tombstone Here deep [enough?] below us lie songs about crabs. Please pass me a tissue; I need a few dabs. Rest in grease. |
26 Dec 06 - 11:10 PM (#1919647) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Stephen L. Rich Sing this to the tune of "On Top Of Old Smokey". My aardvark wears snowshoes. My grandmother's green, And my red, neon necktie, Can barely be seen. My aardvark went shopping, For a purple toupee', When the F.B.I. stopped him, On the Apian Way. Then without any warning, The G-man fell dead, While visions of aardvarks, Danced in his head. Then a nine-legged chicken, Laid an egg on his toes, Which hatched out a Martian, With a fourty foot nose. The nose was so monsterous, That it weighed down his head. He turned with graet effort, To the chicken and said, "My aardvark wears snowshoes. My grandmother's green, And my red, neon necktie, Can barely be seen." Stephen Lee |
27 Dec 06 - 02:30 AM (#1919719) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,gleaner Where next will we arrive at [sic, sick]? Ballad of a Blind Mole Rat? |
27 Dec 06 - 02:43 AM (#1919720) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Bee-dubya-ell A funeral home with a drive-thru window |
27 Dec 06 - 03:07 AM (#1919730) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Joe Offer OK. How about a song about protractors? -Joe- |
27 Dec 06 - 07:40 AM (#1919785) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,Bruce Michael Baillie ...Oy Uncle Dave-O, I've written 3 songs about garden gnomes! Gnome on the Range, The green, green garden gnome, and Gnome boys Gnome. |
27 Dec 06 - 08:25 AM (#1919796) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: JennyO A friend of ours, John Dengate, has written, amongst many others, songs about: Train timetables Cricket The internal combustion engine Skin Cancer Running a marathon Gambling Dental hygiene The stock exchange Changing to metric Rectal bleeding |
27 Dec 06 - 11:33 AM (#1919903) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: An Buachaill Caol Dubh Many of the songs above seem, from a consideration of titles, to tend towards the humorous. Bearing in mind some of the contributions to another current thread, re "What do you need to write (sic) a song", in particular those concerned with "having something to say" (even if it is only that "De Camptown racetrack five mile long..."), are there any examples among the Comic Songs above of their being genuinely satirical; that is, in the guise of humour, actually saying something more significant than that somebody has wee crustaceans.... |
27 Dec 06 - 12:23 PM (#1919934) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: LilyFestre One of my all time favorite made up songs was composed while a 10 year old girl and I were hiking in the woods, singing to keep away the bears. The song was about a mutual someone we didn't like because she treated everyone poorly (including her husband). The tune? What shall we do with the drunken sailor... One of the many verses: She beats him with a frying pan She beats him with a frying pan She beats him with a frying pan Early in the morning... Not much to it at all but we got a good laugh out of it and didn't see a bear all day! :) Michelle |
27 Dec 06 - 12:46 PM (#1919964) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Bert Joe, is that a song challenge or do you have a song about protractors? And, An Buachaill Caol Dubh, All of my songs say something significant. |
27 Dec 06 - 03:01 PM (#1920034) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Peace Keep in mind that John Deere and Case are protractors. Nothin' amateur about them. |
27 Dec 06 - 03:17 PM (#1920040) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Amos I suggest the interested student or aspirant visit the Mudcat Song Book and review all the SONG CHALLENGE threads. I can't begin to remember all the topics. Scientists measuring bees, otters who want to go home, mooses attacking Volkswagens, showgirls throwing underwear, naked men on second-story drainpipes, headless chickens and mysterious chicken-murders and rooster-wranglers, free clothes and golden toilets, to name just a few. Not to mention two variants of the Incandescent Pickle and its uses, and the trials of the ladies who hostess at the Gentlemen's Club, and why women's lib is not all its cracked up to be, and lovers who meet during out-of-body trysts before they marry. Sisters buried in landfills and keys lost in outhouses, weasel-poop coffee, false teeth recovered from toilet drains... cowboys bit by snakes...whores operating beauty salons... the list just goes on and on. A |
27 Dec 06 - 03:24 PM (#1920046) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Scoville Sweet Allis-Chalmers, I've rode you so long, It feels like I'm glued to your wheel, Your rusty exhaust pipe hums me a song, That sounds just as bad as I feel . . . |
28 Dec 06 - 05:53 PM (#1920826) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: M.Ted What songs are about is often quite different than the "subject"-- |
28 Dec 06 - 06:07 PM (#1920836) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Peace "false teeth recovered from toilet drains" That ain't funny! |
28 Dec 06 - 06:10 PM (#1920838) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Ebbie Northern Lights A Troller Dust on Instruments Lament for someone dead too young Rain Getting Better Life after death Golden Rocking Chair Goodbye Welcome after death ... Hmmm. It's hard to condense a song into its parts. |
28 Dec 06 - 07:50 PM (#1920908) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Gorgeous Gary Some of these won't come as a **great** surprise for anyone who knows me, but here's some selections from my songlist: Amazon.com Star Trek (TOS, TNG, DS9) Cloning Lunar cities Toronto. Numerous times. Daleks Donuts On-line friendships Weddings (mine, specifically *grin*) Cats Pirates Health care Jimmy Hoffa Futuristic hotels Winter driving Sedona (and Seattle, and Portland, and San Francisco) IKEA Anne Frank Union construction trades Actually, ought to post that last one... -- Gary I'm going to abuse me editing priviliges here and state that you should post ALL of them - Bert |
28 Dec 06 - 07:51 PM (#1920909) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: katlaughing Rose, nice to see you! |
28 Dec 06 - 07:51 PM (#1920910) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Peace I can't help but ask. How many rhymes did you find for 'car trunk' in the Jimmy Hoffa song? |
28 Dec 06 - 08:00 PM (#1920916) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: bobad "false teeth recovered from toilet drains" A friend of mine once swallowed a crown (tooth variety) and put his crap through a strainer for the next couple of days until he found it and had it replaced - true story. |
29 Dec 06 - 07:35 PM (#1921713) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Stephen L. Rich refresh |
29 Dec 06 - 09:23 PM (#1921790) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Johnhenry'shammer The only song I ever wrote was a blues about a guy who misses his bus to work and gets fired and then kills his bosses family or something like that. I wish I knew where it was |
29 Dec 06 - 11:07 PM (#1921846) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: frogprince "swallowed a crown (tooth variety) and put his crap through a strainer for the next couple of days until he found it and had it replaced" Not my choice of a way to get shit-faced... |
29 Dec 06 - 11:10 PM (#1921849) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: JennyO Yes, it was kinda in-your-face, wasn't it. |
30 Dec 06 - 04:26 AM (#1921970) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,Psychomorris Ashes Cricket (tune of Spanish Ladies) Farewell and adieu to you cricketers of old England farewell and adieu your barmy army went wrong We've bowled out our overs and left you a crying Oh to win back the ashes did'nt take us that long. CHORUS We'll rant and we'll roar like true Aussie cricketers We'll rant and we'll roar at the wickets we got Until the Ashes return to their true homeland It'll be bloody hard going you sad Ponmmie lot. |
30 Dec 06 - 04:37 AM (#1921972) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,Psychomorris Sorry about the interruption.( needed my treatment) I agree there is no subject or matter that can not be written about. Ashes Cricket Cont. The boys of our team they looked so entrancing like bawling young bullocks the're out for their fun With the yell of owzat and all kinds of prancing Mcgraths fine balls takes another wicket for one Chorus We'll rant and we'll roar like true Aussie cricketers We'll rant and we'll roar at the wickets we got Until the Ashes return to their true homeland It'll be bloody hard going for you sad Pommie lot. Then Clarke at Perth that hard bitten batsman caused the trembling Pom bowlers to shit in the dust where the bowlers got smashed by Hussey and Gilchrist the poor Pom's couldn't get near them, Now thats what I call just. Chorus Then fill up your glasses and drink to our cricketrs We'll drink this place dry and watch the Poms fall For now we've won the Ashes from England go on hurry off home cause we've buggered you all. Chorus. A crying Pom Psychomorris |
13 Jan 07 - 04:19 PM (#1935508) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Jim Dixon I don't write songs, but here are some of my favorite songs about surprising subjects: I SHOT YOUR DOG by Fred Eaglesmith. BRANCHING OUT by John Gorka. "When I grow up I want to be a tree." SWIMMING SONG by Loudon Wainwright III. NaCl (SODIUM CHLORIDE) by Kate McGarrigle. GALAXY SONG by Eric Idle and John Du Prez. |
13 Jan 07 - 04:42 PM (#1935536) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Bert At one of Annamill's gatherings there was a guy who wrote a song called "I ran over Bruce Springsteen's Dog". |
13 Jan 07 - 04:57 PM (#1935564) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Big Al Whittle ah! but is all them songs in the tradition? Would a yokel like me be able to sing them songs lustily as he sat down to the 'arrowing weekly task of getting a bowel movement started? Personally I'd like a few more mentions of the First World War and some pit explosions in there - just to get me in the mood. |
13 Jan 07 - 05:10 PM (#1935573) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Georgiansilver O.K so what about a song challenge......someone come up with what the song should be about and let's see what we all can do. I will try to meet any challenge.....I sort of promise!...... |
13 Jan 07 - 05:52 PM (#1935613) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Anniecat No --it isn"t Anniecat : I"m an imposter. Nobody has mentioned "Beans in my ears " or was that too long ago ?? There is another jolly song about crabs---It is sung by naval personnel when referring to members of the Royal Air Force, who are always known as Crabs ---from Crabfat Blue, the colour of their uniforms. For this ,you need a 40 seater bus,a large number of rowdy sailors, and a trumpeter. As you drive past the guardroom of RAF Buggery-in-the-Mire,you get the trumpeter to play the tune of the Camptown Races, whilst all available hands sing " All you Crabfats Piss Me Off, DOO-DAH,DOO-DAH " etc. (repeat incessantly ).Caution--It is advisable to do this only when LEAVING the RAF station, as opposed to when entering it. Bubblyrat, (AKA Signor Tottoff.) |
13 Jan 07 - 07:54 PM (#1935725) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Celtaddict Howard Kaplan (24 Dec, 5:12), that is brilliant, but I kept waiting for the bridge. When the pint ends, When the string breaks, When I'm feeling sore, I simply remember my song topic things And then I go write some more. I also admire John Gorka's 'Winter Cows' (The cows in the mooyard are making their plans for the short winter day and the cold. . . .winter hands.) Joe, still hoping for the protractor. |
14 Jan 07 - 04:28 AM (#1936000) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Georgiansilver When I was at college and just a young man, My ambition was to be a great actor. But now I sit here at my antique pine desk, With dividers, set square and protractor. At least when I go out at night I can sing, I can use other instruments too. And if you don't like this song, written for Joe, I suppose you can always sue! |
14 Jan 07 - 08:14 PM (#1936754) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Girl Friday Hello. I'm half of Tone Deaf Leopard. Our motto- coined by the Barden of England, is "Be Afraid - Be Very Afraid" Song Titles include Four by Four, Wee and A Shave, one colloquially known as The hand-cranking song,Miss Whiplash,Saga Lout Song, Rebel with No Bladder Control, Rochester Town. This last one features a fruitless search for a condom in Rochester, England. Some seasonal songs are I saw the Lights(garish Christmas Decorations), and Twelve curries of Christmas. Don't forget our festival song, Stuck in a Portaloo. |
14 Jan 07 - 10:52 PM (#1936850) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Bert ...ah! but is all them songs in the tradition?.. Not until they are written weelittledrummer, Not until they are written! |
15 Jan 07 - 12:09 AM (#1936889) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Jim Dixon Couple more: FOUR WET PIGS by Greg Brown. HEY, BARTENDER, THERE'S A BIG BUG IN MY BEER |
15 Jan 07 - 12:20 AM (#1936892) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Bert In answer to a song challenge, I once wrote a song that mentioned both 'Fast Cars' and 'Waterfalls'. It was called 'Parabolical'. And Joe thinks that Protractors was difficult. |
15 Jan 07 - 01:52 AM (#1936947) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Stephen L. Rich My friend, Doug Hamilton, wrote one about paperwork to the tune of Old MacDonald's Farm. Old MacDonald had a FORM E-I-E-I-Oh And on this form he had some blanks E-I-E-I-Oh With a blank blank here..., etc. Stephen Lee |
15 Jan 07 - 03:39 AM (#1936981) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Jim Lad Dancing Around In My Wife's Underwear. |
15 Jan 07 - 05:16 AM (#1937008) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Georgiansilver There's nothing so fine, In this life I do swear. Than dancing around in, Jims wifes underwear. Will that do Jim Lad. |
15 Jan 07 - 05:18 AM (#1937009) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Jim Lad Very close! Have you heard me? |
15 Jan 07 - 06:51 AM (#1937056) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Georgiansilver Erm...not that I know of Jim. |
15 Jan 07 - 09:47 AM (#1937215) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,Guest (Trish) Just about anything These aren't the titles, just the subjects Odd socks A Teacher's Life Groundforce (gardening) Building a bridge to the mainland Not building a bridge to the mainland Greenpeace/whaling Pollution Rainy holidays IW Rifles |
15 Jan 07 - 11:25 AM (#1937317) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Jim Lad Ah Trish: I gave you too much information. |
15 Jan 07 - 02:08 PM (#1937460) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: GUEST,Trish Sorry Jim Lad You've lost me - or have I lost the thread? |
15 Jan 07 - 03:10 PM (#1937482) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Jim Lad Not you, Me. I meant "Georgiansilver" |
15 Jan 07 - 04:16 PM (#1937550) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Georgiansilver Long distance information, Give me Jims wifes underwear, Cause its causing consternation, On Mudcat and everywhere. I did not mean to make it, Such a subject on the web. So all that I can hope for, Is this thread will slowly ebb. Chuck Berry eat your heart out!! |
15 Jan 07 - 05:16 PM (#1937623) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Jim Lad I swing to the left I swing to the right Prancing and dancing Well into the night There's nothing on earth That will give your heart cheer Than dancing around In your wife's underwear. 'nuff said. |
16 Jan 07 - 12:13 AM (#1937915) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Skivee I won a song contest writing about mosquitos at a NASA launch site. Admittedly a niche market. |
16 Jan 07 - 12:27 PM (#1938412) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Georgiansilver "Ya give me fever"! I remember it it was a good song.... |
17 Jan 07 - 02:24 AM (#1939110) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Skivee snerk Actually,"'The Wallops Island Red-Blooded All-America Talking Blues', or 'When Is An Aquaintance Not A Friend'"...based on a true story. |
17 Jan 07 - 05:42 AM (#1939196) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Jim Lad Heard a bloke in Australia sing a love song to his tractor. I had a Massey 35. God I miss her! |
17 Jan 07 - 06:14 AM (#1939216) Subject: RE: You can write songs about anything From: Georgiansilver Could be a another song in there with a rhyme for Joes protractor eh? |