I knew this couple in Anchorage who shared a house. She was adorable, played the cello, a plant lover with big potted plants all over the place. He was a fiddle player, handsome, I admired him because he rode his bicycle through the winter. He kind of took her for granted.

He bought a ferret just like that, on a lark.

When last I visited them, the little beast had made itself at home scattering the dirt from all those pots around the house. I came to a realization that the guy was an asshole because this is the kind of thing an asshole does.

The gal eventually came to the same realization and recovered her life. Married a contractor. Big house, two kids. She still plays the cello. The guy lived up to the joke, "What do you call a musician without a wife or girlfriend?"

I don't know what happened to the ferret.