BS: Ferrets

Subject: BS: Ferrets
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 06:20 AM

Heloo, i'm thinking of buying a ferret, i explane why=
i went to the pet ship in town to buy another hamster, and they were 5 quid!, they gone up a lot, [my first hamster, the one called Brian], was only 2 pound]
and ferrets a longer, [a ferret is like a long hamster that has been stretched]
and i see in the paper an advert ="ferrets £7.50 each, or 2 for £15"

and you can go hunting for food with ferrets and catch meat etc, [thats waht they used them for in the olden days]

i found a ferret forum, but i cant find it now.

i don't know why hamsters gone up so much, maybe theres a shotage or something?

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: el ted
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 06:38 AM

STICK WITH HAMSTERS!!!! ferrets are vicious, wild, and totally untameable jOhn. It will bite you each and every time you go near it too. And, pets r us don't do any ferret lingerie.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 06:57 AM

jOhn, get in touch with Richard Whitley at Channel 4, he'll help you.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 07:11 AM

Ferrets get a bad press, they are a lovely pet, and can be handled without any harm to the handler. They need more care and working with than hamsters, so think carefully before getting one.
As for Richard Whitely, if I was a ferret I'd bite him too.
John

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: GUEST,Steve
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 07:18 AM

I like ferrets. Not quite the same meat as rabbits, but not bad, for all that.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Leadfingers
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 07:33 AM

The Lyrics to 'My Grandfather's Ferret' are somewhere in the forum!

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 08:09 AM

Vicious little mongrels that kill native wildlife and that don't belong in Australia.

And they are apparently much more widely spread than originally thought, being sheltered because of their cuteness factor. They are a calls 1 pest in Qld with a $60,000.00 fine - rabbits are only a class 2 - $50,000.00 fine.

And then there is the Song "But Ferretes are illegal in Queensland" - sort of like an "Alice's Resturant"...

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: GUEST,M'Grath of Altcar
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 08:14 AM

If you are going to take it ferreting you should learn how to do it properly or you will loose and possibly kill your ferret.

An underground ferret locator costs about £60.

A good lightweight spade is essential.

And a few nets.

A terrier makes the job easier as well.

Oh and take a good book to read while you wait for the ferret to wake up while he sleeps on the corpse of its kill!

Ferrets don't bite if they are handled regularly and with care.

They will love the hamster (for breakfast!)

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: s6k
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 08:58 AM

i was going to get a ferret once.
now my life has been taken up with ballet dancing

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 09:30 AM

I have a friend who once had a ferret that he kept as a house pet. It seemed to be a nice pet. It was affectionate and playful. It would even romp around the house with the family dog. One day the ferret got out of the house and never came back. My friend said that's what ferrets do.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 09:51 AM

Waht do Ferrets eat? i know hamsters eat hamster food, but i don't know waht ferrets eat.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Amos
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 10:02 AM

Ferret food, of course...

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: UB Ed
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 10:12 AM

http://www.dorje.com/netstuff/jokes/ferret.legging

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Tracey Dragonsfriend
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 10:27 AM

Ferrets eat meat - fingers & ankles, for preference...

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Oaklet
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 10:39 AM

I remember my grandfather putting his prize rabbits into his Ford Squire and driving to a field where they were released to flush out and kill ferrets. He had an enormous trained eel called Derek who seemed to organise things, in the absence of a terrier.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 10:41 AM

Would a ferret be a good present to send George B? Or maybe a dozen?

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Dave Bryant
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 10:46 AM

Put them up his trouser legs !

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Amos
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 10:47 AM

They'd starve to death....


A

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Bill D
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 11:00 AM

I was a ferret sitter for a lady once....what ferrets do it steal stuff and hide it. They are cute, loveable, and a LOT of work!

and, J0hn, they are smart....do you want something that is clever, makes you work and hides your stuff?

And yes, they eat ferret food.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 11:09 AM

Doncha think George W would make a fine meal, or would they choke?

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 11:21 AM

They would see him as a kindred spirit and gather at his feet. But when Condoleeza Rice walked in they would all squeal in terror and hide under the furniture!

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Ellenpoly
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 11:28 AM

LOL! Yes, I need to rethink this one. Poor little critters..xx..e

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Pied Piper
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 11:45 AM

Why would GB need a ferret?
He's already got a Weasel in DR.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: GUEST,M'Grath of Altcar
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 04:59 PM

My freind bernie feeds his ferret (Pavarotti) on frozen day old chicks - frozen for people who keep lizards. He heats them up in the microwave and it eats one chick a day.

A firm called James Wellbeloved make a famous ferret food.

Well ......... famous compared to other ferret foods.

ferret food link!!.......really....I'm serious

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Metchosin
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 05:43 PM

Ferrets hide their food around the house. This can be a problem because sometimes the only way you can find the hidden food is when it begins to smell really bad. Sometimes they will hide it under your mattress.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Shanghaiceltic
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 07:46 PM

Stick with the hamster they can run in wheels, ferrets have to bend in the middle too much so you would have to buy a special ferret running machine for it.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Morticia
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 07:54 PM

but think of the electricity you could raise with a couple of ferrets!

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Peace
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 09:58 PM

Bad choice. Nice fur. Why are you buying it? Business investment? Get a cat. The women will be impressed. Didn't work for me, but it might for you.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: open mike
Date: 13 Apr 04 - 11:14 PM

they also have scent glands like a civet cat
and there is a special ferret bath stuff made
just for them--they can be quite "fragrant"
There are 3 states in the US where they are not allowed..
Hawaii, Calif, and NEw Hamshire i think,..
because they can squeeze out thru small spaces and eat
other pets--mammals, birds, and wild critters
too. The indigineaous black footed ferret
is nearly extinct, but quite resourceful..

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 14 Apr 04 - 11:16 AM

Ferrets are illegal in Queensland and the Northern Territory. In other states you have to have a permit. A local current affairs show claimed that there were over 2,000 ferrets being kept illegally in Brisbane alone.

We have paid a fortune in Qld taxpayers money to erradicate the "fire ant" - even if only 1% of the little mongrels escape in Brisbane each year, that's an awful lot of the little destructive carnivorous mongrels out there breeding, destroying native already highly threatened helpless wildlife! And the word I have had from the DNR is that there are substantial populations out there, not being reported to the DNR even.

Ferrets owners seem keen to spread the delusional lie that the nasty little buggers never bite people. Just like Politicians...

Robin

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Chief Chaos
Date: 14 Apr 04 - 03:35 PM

I and my wife both owned ferrets. Some were loving animals, others were terrorists with a fur coat. Suffered a few bites but never had one break the skin. I always liked to watch them when they went on a jag because the jump and pounce around with their mouths open here there and everywhere, quite amusing! They can be descented though they stil have a natural "muskiness" about them. They like to crap in corners (and any corner that's handy will do just fine), put them in a round room and they'll back around in circles. I've heard that they can be litter trained but I've never seen one that was. In this way you have to pay attention or you'll end up with little presents all over your house. Ladies loved them, never seen a better "chick magnet" than a little walking fur coat.

My female ferret (named Silk after David Edding's Spy/Thief/prince character in the Bellgarion saga)liked to sleep really soundly. You could pick her up and she'd be limp and lifeless. The first time I found her like this I tried a little mouth to nose resusitation (Ferrets give no outward sign of aging and there's no telling how old they might be without getting a real good look at the teeth and that's not always a good idea)because I thought she might have died on me. Should have seen the look in her eyes as she came wide awake while I was trying to gently fill her lungs with lifegiving air.
And before you ask, I've never been able to find a pulse or hear a ferret's heart beat.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Hrothgar
Date: 15 Apr 04 - 03:07 AM

"Ferrets are illegal in Queensland" is to the tune of "The Limerick Rake."

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 05:36 AM

i Think i wont get a ferret now, i read about them, they are probably rubbish.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: GUEST,noddy
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 07:07 AM

John , Are Ferrets rubbish?

Subject: ferret as revelator of human character
From: GUEST,robomatic
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 12:31 PM

I knew this couple in Anchorage who shared a house. She was adorable, played the cello, a plant lover with big potted plants all over the place. He was a fiddle player, handsome, I admired him because he rode his bicycle through the winter. He kind of took her for granted.

He bought a ferret just like that, on a lark.

When last I visited them, the little beast had made itself at home scattering the dirt from all those pots around the house. I came to a realization that the guy was an asshole because this is the kind of thing an asshole does.

The gal eventually came to the same realization and recovered her life. Married a contractor. Big house, two kids. She still plays the cello. The guy lived up to the joke, "What do you call a musician without a wife or girlfriend?"

I don't know what happened to the ferret.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Kim C
Date: 30 Apr 04 - 05:37 PM

A friend of mine has a ferret. It's very sweet and cute, actually - runs around the house with the cats. He has a nice cage with a little ferret hammock to sleep in, and he uses a litter box. They do get fleas, though, same as other furry pets.

If you were to get one and take the time to train it, I think you'd be all right.

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: ced2
Date: 01 May 04 - 05:26 AM

Ferrets are just another way of turning food into shit. They stink, make an 'orrible squeaking noise and have a clear predeliction for human fingers... good decision not to get one!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 01 May 04 - 07:18 AM

Yo ced2, that reminds me of the definition of an Irishman - A simple machine for converting Guiness into piss.
Ferrets only like Richard Whitely fingers.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: Ferrets
From: GUEST,Richard Whiteley
Date: 01 May 04 - 10:32 AM

Ferrets are rubbish