OLD CUR
As recorded by The Limeliters on "Look at Love...in Depth" (1965)

I've got a spot in my heart for my faithful hound,
Old Cur (Old Cur).
Many's the hours we've spent together in easy camaraderie.
I never felt the need to talk; you never barked at me,
Old Cur (Old Cur).

I've got a place in my heart for that loyal beast,
Old Cur (Old Cur).
You've got no best-of-breed blue ribbon; dog fanciers say you're a fool,
Because you are a dropout from their old obedience school,
Old Cur (Old Cur).

They say you're a mutt but your sire was a giant Nottingham prim(?); your dam was a toy passive(?) blue,[*]
And though you're kind of a mixed-up beast, you've got good blood in you.

Ah, you're no kind o' watchdog, Old Cur.
You're no trick dog, bird dog, seek(?) or sled dog.
You're just a plain old sleep-at-the-foot-of-the-bed dog.
You can't fetch, sit, heel, speak, roll over, flush, or mush,
And the only command y'understand is "stay."
You been here seven years a week ago today.
You know you ain't s'posed to be on the bed, old buddy.

Sometimes when I contemplate the state of things, cursin' fate,
It's then you lick my hand, and how well I appreciate
It doesn't take a bell to make you salivate.
Fetch me a tissue, Old Cur.

There's a room in my heart for my faithful friend,
Old Cur (Old Cur).
You bring a creature comfort to computerized society.
You are the only living thing who has a need for me,
Old Cur (Old Cur).


[* I have searched lists of dog breeds, and I have found nothing similar to these; I think they're made up.]