punch the horse at durty nellies hull (UK)

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: GUEST,mick /punchthehorse
Date: 05 Jul 02 - 05:01 AM

Linda,

Unfortunatly it is not compulsary anymore ( oh for those balmy/barmy days of my youth when we met of a sunday afternoon with a selection of the finest company to indulge in a little light Dwyle Flonking )

I am pleased that there is some one out there that remembers what it was all about,i am also suprised that there has not been any more enquires or anecdotes about said subject.

John,

I am delighted that you have enquired about this ( maybe young Oakley can gain inspiration from this epistle)

The ancient sport of "Dwyle Flonking" said to have been played by Richard the Third, involves a lot of heavy drinking.The rules of the game are fairly simple and have a very distant relation to cricket. The game is played by two teams of 11 and, like cricket, one team bats and the other fields

The Dwyle

A rag, soaked in warm beer or cider folded around a wooden stick. The Flonker,

He/she positioned at the centre of the circle, will flick the Dwyle at the opposing team. A back flick can catch the opposition unawares. A feint can cause the circle to break resulting in a point to the flonking side. ) The fielding team forms a circle, holding hands and rotating quickly round a bucket containing the Dwyle soaking in warm beer or cider.

The batting team sends in the first Flonker. He or she picks up the Dwyle and hops in the opposite direction to the defending circle. The flonker then has two attempts at flinging the wet rag at the opposing team. A body hit =1 point, a head hit = 2 points.

The referee will decide whether or not a shot has been a hit and will keep tally of the score accordingly.

If the Flonker should miss with both his/her shots, then the penalty or pot pot situation comes into play. On the referees signal the Flonker must try to drink a potty full of beer(usually the potty will have two well hardened walls pork sausages in it for the sake of realism) before the defending team can pass the Dwyle along a straight line from one end of the team to the other. Two points are awarded to the successful team.

Each flonker has a turn and then the teams reverse roles and play begins again. The team with the most points wins the match.

However,there are penalty points for spillage (1) vomiting (2) wetting oneself (3) following through (10) the "treble up "(disqualification and hosing down )

Note: there has always been an argument about belching and farting,my understanding has always been that these are quite acceptable so long as none of the above result because of this.

Before anyone starts throwing up there hands in horror, and defending there own areas rules,these are the rules as played around Hull as I remember them, even then there is the "skint version" were the rules are altered slightly when a pint can be substituted for the potty.

Great sport!!! just yet another of our dying traditions,maybe we should have a revival?

(volunteers one step forward)

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 04:36 PM

mick-whats dwyle flonking?

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Les from Hull
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 03:58 PM

Unfortunately, I'll be at the Kingston. One of these days, mate, one of these days...

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Linda Kelly
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 03:11 PM

I haven't flonked a dwyle for many a good year -is it still compulsory?

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: GUEST,Raggytash
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 12:09 PM

Mick, Once again I'm going to miss it, Cleckheaton Festival this weekend and we're stewarding. However if you keep us posted we will get there one day

Raggy

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: GUEST,Oakley with sore arms
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 09:20 AM

Skip, I have received reports of the Goxhill session via the Humberside Police Strategic Whistle Division. 'Twas a nice do by all accounts. My Moist Helmet display was judged to be confusing and irrelevant by the South Ferribians, who didn't understand and later drove me out of the village brandishing cudgels and torches whilst shouting curses, not knowing how much I admire multi-tasking in any form. I am undeterred, Greg but I will seek you counsel next time. Thanks for playing the tune, it must have been a highlight of the evening. I will be at Wooton on Sunday (at least in body) after giving me arse a right good pounding on the 164.

I look forward to seeing you and Gerry. John's ursine imbibing should be the subject of a tune. I am on the case, but any thoughts about a title?

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Skipjack K8
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 07:34 AM

Gerry, will make Wootton later on, but will be there. Playing with the family band at a Christening in Cambridge earlier on.

Oakley, I have warned you before about starting dangerous sports without drink. Whilst you were choking your biceps with lactic acid, I mounted a raid on the Brocklesby Hunt with my wrinkled retainer, played your Purple Helmets Theme Tune twice, without so much as a royalty, or even publisher's permission, and was assisted home gone midnight.

John, where can I get some bear? I'm not sure it's too PC to consume body parts of endangered species, but as a writer's catalyst, it sure beats opium. I salute you, sir.

Skipjack

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: GUEST,mick/punchthehorse
Date: 04 Jul 02 - 02:54 AM

Linda,

I have a great admiration for Brother Oakleys many and varied skills/talents.But a chap has his code.

Oakley's posturing and buck leppin' with his new found vocation of exposing himself on the Humber Bridge, leaves me slightly bemused.

I have tried and better tried to urge him to do something constructive with his spare time,like reforming with me "The Red Eyed Formation Drinking Team",with maybe a little light "Dwyle Flonking" on the side.

I feel, given time,and applying hinself to pastimes such as these he will forget the mummery of his past exploits with the purple helmet brigade.

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Banjo-Flower
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 08:09 PM

Oakley,perhaps we could discuss it at Wootton on sunday

Gerry

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Oaklet
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 07:58 PM

Banjo-Flower, I don't know whether it's his honesty or his keyboard that has given me so much pleasure over the months. I suspect the former, what about you?

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Oaklet
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 07:50 PM

John in Hull, It is important that you express what you feel in your own words. And realise that your own voice will veberate here much more.... reverberantly, (bugger that drivel detector) if you issue forth, freely and without influence from the likes of me or anyone. Review the LMR gig please on Sunday night! And yes it was a field, but not a ploughed field but a set-aside field (it sure felt like a ploughed field though). I will defend against allegations of craziness, but will admit to a little benign eccentricity, occasionally when pressed. Have to go now; I am darning a hole in my black leather hangglider in time for the morning rush. Lobsters.

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Banjo-Flower
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 07:48 PM

I wish I had a keyboard like yours John its brilliant

Gerry

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 06:43 PM

hello akley, I wish i knew you was doing a canoe diplay thing tonight, i might have gone, I went to work but shop was reall quiet so i have gone home to drink some bear and look at madcat, i will be hapy to write a review, just tell me what to put and no problum.i just read youre message again, was you canooing in a field? i think you are a bit crazy!

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Oaklet
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 05:56 PM

Skipjack is proving unusually wistful and difficult to pin down after his soujourn in the States. As a precaution, I thought it appropriate to launch the Moist Helmets Canoe Display Team at a fundraiser in South Ferriby tonight. (Sorry, South Ferriby UK - I know that this is an international forum) It went OK, perhaps not a spectacle, I accept that; but being a solitary venture, however lucrative, it is hard work in a ploughed field. No-one saw the urinary finale as it was below the gunwhale and now my arms ache like hell.

Les, Maggie and Rog; have a good 'un. Only the cycling and Wooton (sorry Wooton UK) prevent my attendance.

Perhaps my friend John in Hull can be persuaded to write a review. Assuming of course, that he is not doing anything more pressing on Sunday night. Whadya think John ol' buddy? Darn!! that drivel detector is consistent, if not sensitive.

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 05:28 PM

I have just seen Mr Punch the Horse (Mick) a couple of hours ago, he has got a busy weekend, he is also doing a gig in Lincolnshire, i cant remember wich pub though.If anybody doesnt know were Durty Nellies is, it is on High Street in Hull, very near to the Argos Superstore.

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Linda Kelly
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 01:00 PM

Sorry I won't be there on Friday but see ya Sunday -Mick I heard that you were Oakley's stunt double and were ready at the drop of a puce helmet to perch on his handlebars dispaying your many acrobatic talents whilst cycling over the Humber Bridge -is this not the case?

Subject: RE: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: Sir Roger de Beverley
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 11:34 AM

Yes, go and see Mick and the lads - a guaranteed good time for all.

R

Subject: punch the horse at durty nellies hull
From: GUEST,mick/punch the horse
Date: 03 Jul 02 - 06:14 AM

What a weekend eh!! us playing on our own turf at the Hull Durty Nellies, Nellies at bev.singaround sunday and Roger, Maggies and Les's new venture at the sun in bev. on sun.

Hope every one turns up,we start at nine this Friday night.

Mick (not a member of Oakleys purple helmet golden rain team)