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Folklore: Similes for Today |
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Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: Jeri Date: 18 Mar 02 - 05:31 PM The hammered dogshit one is more visual, and I know what dogshit smells like. Makes it even more potent. Other than that - same general idea. |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: catspaw49 Date: 18 Mar 02 - 05:25 PM "I feel like I been eat by a bear and shit over a cliff"....kinda' like that Jeri? Spaw |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: Jeri Date: 18 Mar 02 - 05:14 PM One tends to retain bugs up one's but when one has a rubber asshole. There must be some stretch, but for the most part, rubber assholes would be as water-tight as a frog's. I had a boss who was very sick and discribed himself as feeling "like hammered dogshit." (Looked like it, too.) A friend occasionally says he feels like a sack of doorknobs. I'm not sure exactly what it means. |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: catspaw49 Date: 18 Mar 02 - 04:20 PM I think we've had a few threads on this before and I keep asking for an explanation of one I heard a friend's Dad say many years ago.......... He acts like a man with a rubber asshole." What does that mean anyway? Spaw |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: Mr Red Date: 18 Mar 02 - 03:52 PM Snuffy I heard it as "a whores draws on Christmas Eve" Morticia those two small boys sure get around, I heard they were under the "big girls blouse" - probably a witch put them there in lieu of! |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: Pseudolus Date: 18 Mar 02 - 03:51 PM Once, when my sister in law was asking ME directions to a bar where MY surprise birthday party was to be that night because she needed to help decorate, my buddy suggested that she was "dumber than a box of hammers....." I've proudly used that since....twice!! Frank |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: jimlad Date: 18 Mar 02 - 03:03 PM Up and down like a brides nightie Off and on like a lad on a new bike Up and down like a fart in a bottle A face like a bag of spanners As popular as a t**d in a swimming pool Tits like Coconuts,they also like Peanuts too Tits like Mudgee mailbags (Mudgee is a godforsaken small Town in NSW Oz where they only get one mail delivery a month,hence they are large) "His face would stand cloggin'" (He is hardfaced) As funny as a fart in a spacesuit
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Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: Snuffy Date: 18 Mar 02 - 08:15 AM Up and down like a whore's drawers |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: khandu Date: 17 Mar 02 - 07:57 PM "Going at it like he was killing snakes" (Enthusiastic, frenetic) khandu |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: Paul from Hull Date: 17 Mar 02 - 07:52 PM A Scottish woman I used to know (& she'll be in her mid-to-late 70's now) used to use the expression "dressed up like a Shillimg dinner". It does make more sense than "dressed up like a DOG'S dinner" which is a more common expression I think, here in the UK. "Mutton dressed up as Lamb" is another common one of course, but I think I invented the more extreme form of that - "Not so much Mutton dressed up as Lamb, as offal ground up for mince..." |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: Morticia Date: 17 Mar 02 - 07:12 PM flat as a witch's tit self-explanatory if somewhat untrue cold as charity ditto like two small boys wrestling under a blanket of large and mobile buttocks mad as an actress also self-explanatory |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: Mr Red Date: 17 Mar 02 - 07:06 PM have we had "like a fart in a colander" ? no? it must be the boiled cabbage then! |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: CapriUni Date: 17 Mar 02 - 05:24 PM Something someone said in a chatroom today, regarding his need for clear driving directions: "I get lost falling down"... maybe not a simile, but a simile's cousin. |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: Liz the Squeak Date: 17 Mar 02 - 05:18 PM Face like a slapped arse.... Face like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle.... A two bagger.... (a bag over her head because he's so ugly, and one over yours in case his falls off....) Fugly... contraction of f**king ugly Arse like two Volkswagen Beetles parking in the same spot... Tits like a bag full of puppies (large unfettered ones....) LTS
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Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: Midchuck Date: 17 Mar 02 - 04:56 PM From a friend of many years ago, with a rural upbringing: Upon observing a female hitchiker: "Don't stop! She's uglier than Death taking a shit!" Of his wife, when he disagreed with her on some point or other: "She's crazier than a shithouse rat!" One of my favorites from a list the late H. Allen Smith put out in one of his jokebooks: "That woman was so tall she could stand flat-footed and piss in the radiator of a Chevy pickup." (You have to be old enough to remember outside radiator caps on cars and light trucks, for that to make sense.) Peter. |
Subject: RE: Similes for Today From: khandu Date: 17 Mar 02 - 04:35 PM "Grinning like a mule eating briars" (Happy) "Shaking like a dog shi**ing persimmon seeds" (Scared, nervous) khandu |
Subject: A Simile for Today From: jimlad Date: 17 Mar 02 - 04:28 PM How are the similies in your part of the world?. Here are some of ours:- "She's a face like a robbers Dog" (she is not such a pretty lass) "She's a face like a pig with piles" (She is not a goodlooker) "He's nowt a pound and s**t* tuppence" (He is a worthless chap) "He's running about like a Bulldog with a Bee up it's a*s* (He is in a hurry) "He's got a face like a freshly slapped a*s* (He does not look too pleased) "Her nipples stood out like a Greyhounds knackers" (It was cold that day)
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