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40 things U won't hear a southern boy say
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Bud Savoie Date: 03 Oct 00 - 07:25 AM The reason we won the Battle of New Orleans is that Jackson had so many Louisiana French on his side. They had a score to settle. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: catspaw49 Date: 02 Oct 00 - 08:37 AM Does seem to me though that some feller name of Perry kicked a little ass on that Erie Lake. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Midchuck Date: 02 Oct 00 - 08:22 AM LittleHawk, give Mbo a break. You have to understand that the War of 1812 is skipped over very cautiously in history courses in U. S. public schools; and what is taught stresses the Battle of New Orleans because we did win that. Most U. S. school kids grow up thinking that we never lost a war except Vietnam, and they're probably fudging on that by now. A few years ago I would have called you a liar. But when I first heard Stan's "McDonnell on the Heights," I was so turned on by it that I started reading about that war, and was very surprised. Peter. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: GUEST,micca at work Date: 02 Oct 00 - 07:25 AM Little Hawk, a couple of points, well, alongside Lee and Jackson, who have the Yankees gotas colourful, Burnside??? and on the War of 1812, the burnt "white house" is so called because the couldn't remove the scorch marks and had to whitwash over them hence the White House. Yeah for Upper Canada...( esp. the micro brewery of the same name and the beer called Rebellion) |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Mbo Date: 02 Oct 00 - 01:15 AM LH, you mustn't be THAT good at history! Gettysburg was July 1-3 1863. This seems to be more of a minor skirmish. There were a lot of reports of small foraging parties being attacked on this day. BTW he's buried at Arlington. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Little Hawk Date: 02 Oct 00 - 01:10 AM Mbo - We Canadians are gonna have to change your official moniker to "Dumbo" for that last remark! Oooo...we're ticked off now! Are you aware that in the War of 1812, the American forces were repulsed on numerous occasions when they tried to invade Canada? We "kicked their butts" (to quote a Yankee phrase) every single time. Furthermore, our redcoats sailed up the Potomac and burned Washington to the ground ("And the White House burned, burned, burned, and we're the ones that did it...in the War of 1812" * contemporary Canadian folksong). "We fired our guns and the Yankees kept a-comin', there wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago, we fired once more and then they get to runnin', across the wide Niagara, boys, and back to Buffalo..." Add to that the fact that the British Navy swept the sea pretty much clean of American shipping during 1812-1814. In isolated incidents the American frigate Constitution did very well on its cruises defeating the British frigates Guerriere (formerly French) and Java, but the British Shannon defeated the American Chesapeake, and the British in general ruled the roost at sea. The Battle of New Orleans is so well remembered in the USA mainly because it's the only really significant land engagement that the Americans won in that war...and it occured 2 or 3 weeks after the war was officially over. I guess maybe the Canadians who joined the Confederacy were doing their bit to get back at the Yankees who had tried to invade Canada only 50 years earlier...or maybe they figured it would be advantageous to British North America to break up the USA. Now don't worry, Matt, I'm not actually angry...I just had to retaliate in kind for the sheer fun of it, and I love history. :-) I'm wondering...was J.Richards killed at Gettysburg? |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Ely Date: 02 Oct 00 - 12:47 AM Confederate is a lot more popular. I don't know what part of the continent you're on, but if you've ever been to reenactments in the South, the Union is always so badly outnumbered it's ridiculous. My brother's been in situations where the Union is, historically, supposed to win, but is fighting with 15 guys against 90 Confederates (not exaggerating). Unfortunately, there are also a lot of "biker brigades", where guys want to be Confederate expressly for the ambience and don't care so much about the history. You can usually spot them by their suede kepis and motorcycle boots. I don't care if they want to do that kind of thing, but it hurts when you're trying to create as convincing an atmosphere as possible. On a lighter note . . . "That smells nice--is it a new kind of incense?" |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Midchuck Date: 01 Oct 00 - 10:06 PM We've done music at a number of Civil War reenactments. I'm not sure if it's my imagination or not, but the rebels always seem to be having more fun. I'm sure they drink more, on the average...or maybe I'm not supposed to notice that... Peter. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Mbo Date: 01 Oct 00 - 09:51 PM Canadians in every Southern regiment? No wonder they lost! **BG** --Matt Richards, descendant of J.Richards, 134th Pennsylvania, killed July 4th, 1864. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Little Hawk Date: 01 Oct 00 - 09:44 PM Hey, Micca...that's quite interesting to know. Thanks for the info. The American Civil War was a fascinating and very tragic conflict, and it must have aroused strong feelings among many in Canada and elsewhere. I appreciate the concerns of both sides in that war...Lincoln's desire to preserve the Union, the abolitionist's to free the slaves, and the Confederates to defend their sovereignty and their State's rights. I must say, though, that the South had a certain style and elan which I find pretty irresistible, and they had generals like Lee and Jackson who were the best of their day. Plus...they were badly outnumbered. They had almost no chance of survival in the long run, let alone victory, and that has an appeal all its own...the appeal of the underdog. It's a great challenge for wargamers, who usually prefer to command the Southern forces, just to see if they can pull off a miracle and actually win against all odds. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Ely Date: 01 Oct 00 - 05:15 PM Ommmmmmm . . . [meditating here] |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Micca Date: 01 Oct 00 - 12:40 PM Little Hawk My SO showed me an article in the Canada Post September 2000 that says that more than 50,000 Canadians served in the American Civil War it says "Following the war the figure of 40,000 was popularised by Mc Donald the ist Canadian Prime Minster later "Sir Joseph Howe..... upped this to 50,000" and also "Nor was Canadian participation restricted to the North,There were Canadians serving with every Confederate regiment throughout the war" |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Little Hawk Date: 30 Sep 00 - 08:33 PM Hey, GospelPicker, if I am ever down that way I will put some flowers by Robert E. Lee's monument (seriously). He was a great man. His Army of Northern Virginia was an outfit without peer in that war. Only at Gettysburg did he miscalculate (by launching Pickett's charge). Where exactly is his monument located? Further to that, I can understand your patriotism and loyalty to the South (like mine to Canada), but I will add one additional comment of my own...we are all truly blessed in EVERY LIFE to be human. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: GospelPicker (inactive) Date: 30 Sep 00 - 05:47 PM Being a native Texan (like my bud Willie, Buddy Holly, Bob Wills, Ernest Tubb, George Jones and so many other greats) I am sometimes appalled at how true a lot of these remarks are... many of my Southern brethren are rather... uncouth. I have family in Louisiana, Texas and Florida... ALL of the men are gentlemen and truly genteel individuals. The Southern Ladies in my family are mild-mannered, polite, hospitable and refined. Yes, we like things that are down-to-earth and sometimes a bit "goofy" or "trashy" to the Yankee, but it is because our great Southern Heritage has always been one where your enjoyment and sport developed out of a necessary function (hunting, using a tractor to pull a heavy load) and we were somtimes at a financial disadvantage compared to the "automated, mechanized" Yankee. I laugh at a good redneck joke like anyone; a clean one, of course. But I am saddened by the fact that there are not more genteel Southern men wanting to step up and be the charming, respectable, admirable men that our forefathers were... I grew up in NJ for a number of years and now live in PA... I traveled to New Orleans (the most romantic city on Earth) to ask my sweetheart to be my wife. I would not have done it any other way. There are many things, including saved and bound for Heaven one day, that I am "by the grace of God." but personal salvation notwithstanding, I am truly blessed in THIS life to be Southern. There is a monument dedicated to the Southern men who lost their lives in the War Between The States... Robert E. Lee is standing at the top, facing north. There is a YMCA building directly in the statue's line of sight. A friend once said, "Mr. Lee thinks YMCA stands for "YANKEES MIGHT COME AGAIN"... He is facing due north because he learned NEVER to turn your back on a Yankee. "Oh, I wish I was in the land of cotton, Old times there are not forgotten; Look away; Look away. Look away, Dixieland. I wish I was in Dixie, hooray! hooray! In Dixieland I'll take my stand! To live and die in Dixie! Away! Away! Away down South in Dixie!" GospelPicker @:()>[+] [><]
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: GUEST,ketil Date: 30 Sep 00 - 03:55 PM Yankees..........hmph! the redneck letter above is AWFULLY close to Mr. Arquette's "Letters from Mama" (he was also known as Charlie Weaver) Keep the South beautiful, buy a Yankee a bus ticket. Ketil |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Mbo Date: 30 Sep 00 - 02:54 PM If you think when you get to the Pearly Gates, St.Peter says "Y'all hop in the pickup, we're goin' up to the big house!" you might be a redneck. Others: If you've had to climb up on the town watertower with a can of spraypaint to defend your sister's honor, you might be a redneck. If your grandma says "Hey everybody, come look at something weird" before she flushes the toilet, you might be a redneck. There are also the redneck work "ah-ite", "yuntoo?" and "jeet?" BTW "jeet?" is also part of me and my family's Philadelphia accent, along with "Yeeuh". |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Barbara Date: 30 Sep 00 - 02:47 PM THAT was the name! Someone emailed me these a while back, and I didn't save it. Thanks, MBO. Do you remember the rest of the bit at the end about "Yawl hop in the back of the pickup and I'll give you a ride to the big house"? There were more, too, something about belt buckles, and bein' in 6th grade with yr dad, I think... Blessings, Barbara |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Biskit Date: 30 Sep 00 - 02:44 PM William Jefferson Clinton isn't even Moral enough to be An Arkansas Lawyer,Is he a Southern Gentleman???...In a Pigs Eye! American by Birth, and Southern, by the Grace of God. Peace,"through understanding",-Biskit- |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Mbo Date: 30 Sep 00 - 02:40 PM Barb--yer rippin' off Jeff Foxworthy there! |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Barbara Date: 30 Sep 00 - 02:31 PM Here's some ways to tell if you are a southern boy: The rear window of yer car is a plastic trash bag You know exactly how many bales of hay will fit in that car (cause the pickup's up on blocks on the front lawn) Your family tree is a straight line YOu go to family reunions to meet wimmen Your front porch collapses and kills at least 6 dogs You've ever used a weed-eater indoors You see a bumper sticker that says "Say No to Crack" and it reminds you to pull up your pants You think beer and moonpies are the two major food groups |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: bbelle Date: 30 Sep 00 - 02:22 PM Yes ... it used to come in colors to match NCR paper colors, too. THANK G-D for computers and editing priviledges ... |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Catrin Date: 30 Sep 00 - 02:06 PM Moonjen, Probably - 'White out' sounds like an alternative title to me. Its the stuff you 'paint' over typing when you make a mistake. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Troll Date: 30 Sep 00 - 09:52 AM " Velveeta? Why din't ya buy Brie like I tole ya to." "I really prefer Volvo to Ford or Chevrolet." "What's 'NASCAR'"? |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: bbelle Date: 30 Sep 00 - 09:24 AM Catrin ... is Tippex the same thing as White-Out? |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Catrin Date: 30 Sep 00 - 05:24 AM On the computer theme: Tippex on the monitor............
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall) Date: 29 Sep 00 - 11:48 PM Alice, You forgot the PS: on the Redneck son letter. PS: I was gonna send some money , but I've already sealed the envelope. Slán, Rich |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Mbo Date: 29 Sep 00 - 05:09 PM 1 thing you'll never hear Bill Clinton say: "No." |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: catspaw49 Date: 29 Sep 00 - 05:04 PM I dunno' Sins.........I'd say close, but no cigar. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Bert Date: 29 Sep 00 - 05:01 PM Damn capslock |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: SINSULL Date: 29 Sep 00 - 05:00 PM iS BILL cLINTON A SOUTHERN GENTLEMAN? |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: bbelle Date: 29 Sep 00 - 04:25 PM ... and no proper Southern Belle would ever be caught without sunbonnet, gloves, corset, hoop, and at least 2 crinolines underneath her columnious dress. But if you peek underneath in the hot July heat, be prepared for a wink, for most likely she will be bare ... |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Mbo Date: 29 Sep 00 - 03:34 PM All of a sudden, this comes to mind! This is one of my all time favorite posts from kat.
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Ely Date: 29 Sep 00 - 03:30 PM Also applicable is "She's too OLD to be wearing that bikini." HOW DO YOU KNOW IF A REDNECK HAS BEEN WORKING AT YOUR COMPUTER? 10) There are Dodge truck parts installed in the extra RAM slots. 9) The numerical keypad only goes up to 6. 8) All but four of the front keys are rotted out. 7) The mouse is referred to as the "critter". 6) Instead of the Windows logo, you get a Confederate battle flag. 5) Instead of chimes, your start-up music is "Dueling Banjos". 4) There's a Skoal can in the CD-rom. 3) There's a gun rack mounted on the CPU. 2) Your interactive screen-saver involves a ten-point buck and a double-barrelled shotgun. 1) When you visit your friends' websites, Geocities bombards you with ads for beer, ammunition, and organizations to contact in case of abduction by UFO's. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Mary in Kentucky Date: 29 Sep 00 - 03:13 PM 1, 2, 3, go.... (a real Southern boy says, 1, 2, Dale Earnhardt, go... |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Peter T. Date: 29 Sep 00 - 03:02 PM Canadian rednecks (yes, we have a few), would not say: "Shania rhymes with mania" "Could I have another of those tasty American beers, Innkeeper?" "If they put a few sharks into the pool, then synchronized swimming would be a sport." "While we are pretty good hockey players, I think the Russians have over time shown that they really understand the game" "I do remember Mr. Tim Horton, but what connection is there between him and doughnuts?" "One nice thing -- among many -- about Toronto is the way in which gay couples can walk hand in hand without anyone making much of a fuss." "We are far too influenced by American culture. Why, my own daughter believes that Xena actually occupies a place in the Greek mythological pantheon alongside Athena and Hera!" yours, Peter T. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Mary in Kentucky Date: 29 Sep 00 - 03:02 PM When is deer season? |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: catspaw49 Date: 29 Sep 00 - 02:56 PM Leej, are you implying that Mr. Stuart would go off on a long, self-serving joy ride instead of sticking to the task at hand? HARUMPH!!! "Hey Honey, let's git us one of them new little Honda Vans and git rid of my turbo-diesel pickup." Spaw |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Lonesome EJ Date: 29 Sep 00 - 02:43 PM Manly as JEB was,he spent a lot of the war joyriding,while simple farmers marched in perfect order into the cannon's maw.Yes,sometimes class can be a real advantage... And back to the topic- I'll have another glass of the cabernet,garcon Can you get the three egg breakfast without grits? |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: John Hardly Date: 29 Sep 00 - 02:10 PM Back to the thread "No, I believe that, to be accurate, Seurat was a POINTALIST, MONET was the Impressionist to whom you refer" John |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: catspaw49 Date: 29 Sep 00 - 02:01 PM Try to revere Mr. Stuart by referring to him as J.E.B. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Little Hawk Date: 29 Sep 00 - 01:49 PM moonjen, you are right about REAL Southern gentlemen. Damn straight! Those guys have class with a capital "C". That's why I still revere Robert E. Lee and "Jeb" Stuart and quite a few others. That's style. That's manliness. It's a pity there aren't more of 'em, that's all I can say. Wish I was in Dixie... |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: mousethief Date: 29 Sep 00 - 01:36 PM No, LEJ, that's Lake Michigan.
Alex |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Lonesome EJ Date: 29 Sep 00 - 01:21 PM Now it's one thing for us Southern boys to make fun of our own selves,but when y'all yankies from Ohia and Montana and worse(Canada and England) start in on us,why,that just gores my hog. And what Little Hawk said about southern boys not knowin' where Canada is really takes the rag off'n the bush.Everybody knows it's that big iceflow north of Indiana. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: catspaw49 Date: 29 Sep 00 - 01:11 PM Yeah moon....."Mount the handlebars to the bedsted and RIDE, RIDE, RIDE!!!!!" (Gallagher, a good ol' Florida boy) Spaw |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: bbelle Date: 29 Sep 00 - 12:56 PM I do find it interesting that there's not a long list of "wherever" men and that southern men are usually the target. You forgot to mention that a true southern gentleman can charm the knickers off any, and I mean any woman. That a true southern gentleman will say "thank you" when you're "done." That a true southern gentleman would never display humour at disgusting bodily emanations. That being said .... What is Bubba's idea of foreplay? "Brace yourself, Peggy Sue." |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: mousethief Date: 29 Sep 00 - 12:50 PM "Hey! Who switched off the figure skatin' and turned on this stupid FOOTBALL shit?"
Alex |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: catspaw49 Date: 29 Sep 00 - 12:47 PM "I can't hold this beer and drive at the same time." Hockey? Yeah right. Columbus, either the worlds biggest college town (Ohio State) or Cow-Town Extraordinaire, has never had a major league sports franchise unlike Cleveland or Cincy. So after great effort and mucho bucks we now have an NHL hockey team, the Blue Jackets. All of the upstanding yuppies are buying season tickets and the news is constsntly playing up the team and the new arena. The rest of us shitkickers are still wondering if we will ever get a major league team, like one in a real sport. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: mousethief Date: 29 Sep 00 - 12:28 PM "No, I don't reckon that would taste good fried in bacon grease." "Her t*ts are too big." "Beans don't really go good with that." "What would I need a pickup truck for?" "I think I'll leave my rifles at home today."
Alex |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Mbo Date: 29 Sep 00 - 12:16 PM No, you're wrong on that one, LH. Southerners have little or no care about hockey. In our local papers, elementary school & highschool football get HUGE (and I mean HUGE) headlines, while hockey is stuck waaaaay in the back, with just a teeny tiny article. About hockey, they'd say "That's that really cold game that those city boys up in Raleigh play." |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Little Hawk Date: 29 Sep 00 - 12:10 PM Beautiful, Alice!!! ROTFLMAO!!! I just noticed that in my previous posting I put in a couple of things that southern boys actually WOULD be likely to say...namely: Where's Canada? Canada? What's Canada? Is it a new brand of beer? And then there's... What're them Canadians doing playing our hockey game? Whaddya mean the Canadiens/Expos/etc. won the championship? They ain't even Americans! What the hell is going on around here?!!?? Hee! Hee! (evil grin) |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Alice Date: 29 Sep 00 - 11:51 AM First I want to say that I hope this doesn't offend anyone.
Dearest Redneck Son,
I'm writing this slow because I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home. Your Dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles of your home, so we moved. I won't be able to send you the address because the last Arkansas family that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so they wouldn't have to change their address. About that coat you wanted me to send; your Uncle Billy Bob said it would be too
heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.
it took him two hours to get me and your father out. Your sister had a baby this morning, but I haven't found out what it is yet so I don't know if you> are an aunt or uncle. The baby looks just like your brother. to pull him out but he fought them off and drowned. We had him cremated, he burned
for three days. There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much out of the normal
has happened.
Your Favorite Aunt, |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Little Hawk Date: 29 Sep 00 - 11:30 AM More things southern boys "don't never" say: Well, I've had enough...(beer, steak, fries, whatever) Anybody got a napkin? Geez, honey, you oughta wear a bra with that top! I think wet T-shirt contests are tasteless and offensive. Moderation in all things, that's my credo. We should apologize to the "Veet-namese" fer what we done there. I don't approve of mindless violence! We gotta clean up the violence in hockey right now! Where's Canada? Canada? What's Canada? Is it a new brand of beer? Too much beer ain't good fer yer health. * * * * and... You Know You Are Trailer Park Trash When... One of your kids was conceived on a pool table. You held your marriage ceremony on the back of a flatbed trailer. You had your honeymoon in Tumbleton, Alabama. And your wife bears an uncanny resemblance to your kid sister. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Wesley S Date: 29 Sep 00 - 11:08 AM My favorites from Jeff Foxworthy are - " You may be a redneck if you've ever been to drunk to fish " and " Trust me guys - when the diaper box says 8 to 10 pounds - that's all it'll hold" |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Midchuck Date: 29 Sep 00 - 10:41 AM You Know You Are Trailer Park Trash When... 1. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse. 2. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids. 3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws. 4. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night. 5. Jack Daniel's makes your list of "most admired people." 6. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean. 7. Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey, watch this." 8. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader. 9. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan. 10. Your junior prom had a daycare. 11. You think the last words of the Star Spangled Banner are, "Gentlemen, start your engines." 12. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels. 13. The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas is in it. 14. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge. 15. One of your kids was born on a pool table. 16. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos. 17. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it. 18. You think loading a dishwasher means getting your wife drunk. 19. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it. 20. Your front porch collapses and kills more than five dogs. P. |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Catrin Date: 29 Sep 00 - 10:32 AM I think I'm getting a picture of these people. Counterparts do exist in UK believe me.
How about Would that be somewhere near the mark? Cheers, Catrin |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: catspaw49 Date: 29 Sep 00 - 10:26 AM "Who's Richard Petty?" Spaw |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Mbo Date: 29 Sep 00 - 10:16 AM Well, having lived in the South for 12 of my 21 years, I can come up with these TRUTHFUL ones:
12.) It's just one bumper sticker too many! |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: catspaw49 Date: 29 Sep 00 - 07:12 AM I think the beans have cooked long enough. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Bugsy Date: 29 Sep 00 - 01:32 AM 45) This Mechanicking business is playing havoc with my nails. CHeers Bugsy |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Bugsy Date: 29 Sep 00 - 01:31 AM 44) Never mind about me - Was it good for you? CHeers Bugsy |
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Subject: RE: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Lonesome EJ Date: 29 Sep 00 - 12:54 AM 41)Ice fishing? Sounds like a blast! 42)Wait a minute,Darlin'.Let me wash those dishes. 43)Time to get the poodle trimmed again. |
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Subject: 40 things U won't hear a southern boy sa From: Rich(bodhránai gan ciall) Date: 29 Sep 00 - 12:43 AM My brother sent me this. I thought some people hear might enjoy it. 40 THINGS YOU JUST WON'T HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY: 40) Oh, I just couldn't. She's only 16. 39) I'll take Shakespeare for $1000, Alex. 38) Duct tape won't fix that. 37) Honey, I think we should sell the pickup and buy a family sedan. 36) Come to think of it, I'll have a martini. 35) We don't keep firearms in this house. 34) Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer? 33) You can't feed that to the dog. 32) I thought Graceland was tacky. 31) No kids in the back of the pickup. It's just not safe. 30) Wrestling's fake. 29) Honey, did we mail that donation to Greenpeace? 28) We're vegetarians. 27) Do you think my gut is too big? 26) I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy. 25) Honey, we don't need another dog. 24) Who gives a damn who won the Civil War? 23) Give me the small bag of pork rinds. 22) Too many deer heads detracts from the decor. 21) Spitting is such a nasty habit. 20) I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today. 19) Trim the fat off that steak. 18) Cappuccino tastes better than espresso. 17) The tires on that truck are too big. 16) I'll have the arugula and radicchio salad. 15) I've got it all on the C: drive. 14) Unsweetened tea tastes better. 13) Would you like your fish poached or broiled? 12) My fiancée, Bobbi Jo, is registered at Tiffany's. 11) I've got 2 cases of Zima for the Super Bowl. 10) Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams. 9) Checkmate. 8) She's too young to wear a bikini. 7) Does the salad bar here have bean sprouts? 6) Hey, here's an episode of Hee-Haw we haven't seen! 5) I don't have a favorite college team. 4) Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side. 3) You all. 2) Those shorts oughta be a little longer, Darla. 1) Nope, no more for me. I'm driving tonight. |
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