CATSPAW, we beseech thee

Subject: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Dave Swan
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 10:47 AM

Oh most flatulent one, appear unto us. Tell us that the chest tubes have not deflated thee, that a mighty BRRRAAAAAPPP is still the clarion call of thy presence.

Tell us that the gentle tick, tick, tick, emanating from thy chest has not overcome the sound of the little voices crying out in thy head.

Tell us the evil Foley has not drained thee of thy vital piss & vinegar.

Drag thine ass to the computer and send us word.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Amos
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 10:51 AM

Ah, Swanno, how kind, how intense, how heartfelt a prayer!!! I dunno if Spaw is used to being beseeched, though -- he might have some trouble processing this kind of adulation. Although many have worshiped His Flatulence from afar (for obvious reasons) this is the first time in my memory anyone has actually stepped up to the Altar of Flatus and raised a prayer. I'm not sure anyone remembers what the ensuing ceremony is supposed to look like, and frankly I'm a little scared of finding out!

A

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: MMario
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:01 AM

I was always under the impression that the Altar of Flauts was more to be besmirched then beseeched, but I could be wrong.

Still - It could be worth a try. However, I think El Swanno may not be using the correct style of beseechment.

oh great and flatulant; whose winds fortell thy coming before thy arrival; whose breath gives rise to scatological hymn and the whistle of possums; oh ye of great heart and clicky valve; come to us that we might laugh!

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: mousethief
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:01 AM

Actually "from afar" isn't necessary, as long as you're downwind.

Alex

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: mousethief
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:02 AM

I mean upwind. Doh.

Alex

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Bill D
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:07 AM

or, if you have a match handy click, then dodge

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: pavane
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:08 AM

I haven't been here long enough to remember, but you are obviously held in high regard, and worshipped from afar (with good reason?)

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Noreen
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:09 AM

I'd rather be upwind myself, if it's all the same to you, Alex.

Will be good to see you back, Spaw. The flamingoes are missing you.

♥ Noreen

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Lin in Kansas
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:16 AM

See, Alex--"afar" is always best, just to avoid small confusions like that...(consider the consequences of an error in windage!)

El Swanno, Amos, MMario--whether the Altar is to be beseeched or besmirched, I STILL don't wanna think about the ceremony. (Shudder).

Welcome, Welcome Home, 'Spaw--

Lin

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: mooman
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:21 AM

Dear 'Spaw,

I hadn't fully realised your powers of flatulence before although they have always been legendary:

Part of an astronomical definition:

nebula: .......any gaseous body of unorganized stellar substance

And look what I found named after you!

I am truly in awe and humbly await your return O powerful one...

mooman

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: mousethief
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:25 AM

Okay, I stand corrected. And afar off.

Alex

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Bill D
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:36 AM

ohhh, my! hot gasses light years away!...That vegemite is powerful stuff!

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: SINSULL
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:37 AM

YOU PEOPLE ARE SCARY! Especially the ones who spend their free time searching out Catspaw references on the WEB! Prayers aren't going to work. Just place a large bowl of chili near a computer - "if you build it, he will come!" Miss you, Pat. We're waiting. (And the locals are getting a little out of hand. We may need Paw and the Reg boys to get things under control - the blind leading the blind)

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: mooman
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:51 AM

Sins,

You don't think I would do this in my FREE time do you. This is important WORK-related business!

mooman

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Pseudolus
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 11:53 AM

I could be wrong but I think flatulance can only create afar iffn' yer mixin it with matches.....

Frank

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: GUEST,JohnB
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 12:06 PM

"Amos, MMario--whether the Altar is to be beseeched or besmirched" as long as it does not become "bespattered" in the process it's not too bad. JohnB

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Kim C
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 12:18 PM

I can't say nothin because I am laffin too hard.....

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Áine
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 12:48 PM

. . . and the clouds parted, and the other Mudcat deity spake thusly . . .

Oh Flatus Maximus, thou who art of great fart and heart, hear the cry of your humble servants, who poot only to please thee. Besmear, besmirch, and besplatter us with thy gaseous glutimus, for we art lost in a brown fog without thee to lead us into the halls of Montezuma's Revenge. Pay heed to our beseechment, oh Putus Glorimus, for the universe doth grow exceedingly sweet-smelling without your putrid pronouncements. Rescue your humble worshippers of the Patricus Potamus, and come to us in our most flatulent hour of need.

Humbly and most besmearingly yours, TGG (High Priestess of the Patricus Potamus Local 69)

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Little Hawk
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 01:00 PM

"Ground Control to Major Tom..."

- LH

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Jim Krause
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 01:17 PM

Oh boy, this is too much LMAO.
Jim

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: katlaughing
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 01:30 PM

Ugh! I think you all had better read THIS, over and over, sounds like yer gonna need it!

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: GUEST,Kim C no cookie
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 01:34 PM

Should we invite Vladimir Putin to the party?

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: catspaw49
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 02:12 PM

BBRRRAAAAWWWMMMPP

.........ahhh......Tis good to be back!!!

Gimmee a little bit to collect a few thoughts and go retrieve my stupid Weimaraner from the Doggie Motel and I'll give you some of the better stories of this past week. Sitting here and again reading these many posts from all of you leaves me more that a bit humbled.........Okay, so it's just a little bit, but that's a lot of progress for a reprobate like myself.

Having lived in this cyber village for a long while, I am still amazed and completely in awe of the power we have to care for each other. Karen and I will always be forever in the debt of all of you and this Reamrkable place. When I woke up in post-op, I was thrilled to be alive.......This thrill lasted just to the leeward side of 3 seconds when the pain made me wish I were not! During that next 48 hours, I thought of this place and believe me when I say that I had a very real feeling of "presence"........I knew you were there. And at various times things would strike me like, "Geez, I gotta' remember to tell the 'Catters this." Thank you all from the depths of my well functioning heart for every thought, word, prayer, and song. You provided once again to Karen that rock she now knew would be there and did the same for Wayne and Connie. I am indeed blessed by having them as I am blessed to have so many great friends here.

Physically, I have not felt this good in probably ten years or more. The A-fib was not creating the problem at all, but the slow deterioration of the Mitral Valve was. I can breathe better than I have done in years. "It's amazing how having a blood supply fully pressurized and not backwashing can make so much of a difference," said the dumbass Spaw. Already my energy level is easily 5 times greater than what it was and seems to continue to improve by the moment!!!

As to the daVinci and Dr. Michler........I am even more amazed than I was before. Even having to replace the valve, only a 2 inch opening was made just under the right breast. What made the pain so bad was tht this is muscle tissue and the drain tube was like having a knife in your side. When the surgical wounds heal, that too will be gone. The difference between this and my previous chest cracking for the by pass is truly significant!!! Michler and his team are truly skilled and you always had the feeling that it was going to work........Fantastic people.

So let me run and get my hound and then I have to call Campus Security to see about Paw, Cletus, and the Reg boys.......Hopefully I can get the charges reduced.........

Our many thanks.....and it's GREAT to be back!!!!!!!

Spaw

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: MMario
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 02:23 PM

damn - that's good to read.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: jeffp
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 02:26 PM

Oh yeah.......life is good.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Max
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 02:30 PM

Thank You Spaw. It is truely grand to have you back. Now cut this out will you? This is twice now, it's someone elses turn.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: GUEST,Dancing Mom
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 02:46 PM

So glad things are going well. I was reading all this stuff and laughing and fearing for your poor tender incision, which, apparently they did a "window", so you don't have much of one. The muscle soreness, however, is typical of the procedure you had. Hang in there. Sharon

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Dave Swan
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 02:49 PM

Glad you're back. It was getting to be a pain in the ass keeping the blue flame burining in the window.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: MMario
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 02:54 PM

yeah - the bean consumption alone was beginning to be a bit more then most people could stand.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Kim C
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 03:24 PM

Hidy! :-)

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Mark Clark
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 03:24 PM

Great to see you back, Pat. Wishing you a speedy recovery and, as we say in Church, "God grant thee many years."

      - Mark

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: SINSULL
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 03:28 PM

Thank goodness. Now things can back to normal!

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: SINSULL
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 03:31 PM

It just hit me. This time a week ago, I was sleepless worrying about whether Spaw was ever going to be "computer friendly" again. Today he is out getting the dog! Wondrous times.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: katlaughing
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 03:35 PM

Ain't it grand, Sins? What an indelible stamp he is at Mudcat and in our hearts!

wb, Spawdarlin'

luvyakat

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Eric the Viking
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 03:39 PM

Good stuff, Spaw. Keep the gettinbetter going.
Cheers

Eric

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Amergin
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 03:46 PM

Well, I am glad you're back, ya old (and I mean old) fart! just keep your gaseous explosions elsewhere.....

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 03:52 PM

Its REALLY GREAT to see you back Catspaw.john

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: katlaughing
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 03:55 PM

Spawdarlin, be sure to tell them about your new role as "Mudcat Missionary" that's what Rog said, instead of Second Mudcat Ambassador At Large.:-) Gonna have to replace some seedies as Mortee would say, eh?**BG**

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: mooman
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 04:08 PM

Welcome back 'Spaw! It's a joy to read you're feeling so much better than before. Best wishes to the whole family too.

mooman

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Áine
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 04:20 PM

HOT DIGGITY DAMN! HE'S BACK . . .!!!!!!!!

My dearest darlin' diacretatious deity . . . how good to hear you discharge among us again!

Now, about Paw, Cletus, and the Reg boys . . . the money that went missin' from the Neil Young Center Support Fund of Patricus Potamus Local 69 wasn't that much -- about 42 cents, if all be told -- so, as High Priestess, I'll guarantee that the charges will be dropped, if you guarantee that you won't go missin' in action no mo'. Is that a deal, Lucille?

Biggest hugs to you and the fam, and biggest snogs on all your relevant body parts, ya buggah -- Áine

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Allan C.
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 04:21 PM

I couldn't say it before...and I find that I can't really say it now. But if you were standing here before me, you'd have a hard time avoiding a bear hug --well, if the doctors would allow it, anyway.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Jeri
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 04:30 PM

Spaw, glad to see you back, but even more glad you're feeling so well. If a not-so-healthy Spaw can wreak the havoc you did around this place...I'm scared.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: GUEST,JohnB
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 04:46 PM

You'd better lay of the Viagra with all that new found pressure. Welcome Home, JohnB.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Morticia
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 05:36 PM

Yippeeeeeeeee!!!!!!Snogs all round, with the biggest and slobberiest going to my uncle Pat, and one specially set aside for Karen.

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Jock Morris
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 05:46 PM

Spaw, it is great to have you back. I sure I speak for all the folks here when I say WE MISSED YOU!

Scott

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 06:18 PM

Good to have you again..... and give the doggies a pat from me...

LTS

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 06:27 PM

Oh, by the way, Nice pair of nebula's you have there....

LTS

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Áine
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 06:40 PM

Hey there, my dearest Patricus Pootamus Maximus -- Check out SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 57 -- It's dedicated to yourself, and my darlin' Challenge!rs are 'out-pooing' themselves in your honour!! Check it out, oh thou of the sweetest saggy ass in Mudcatdom, it's all just for you!!

With all appropriate arm movements and lip puckers, Áine

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: Banjer
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 06:49 PM

Well here I am home from work and it is as I had hoped!! A personal greeting from the 'Spawman hisself!! Life is great!! Welcome home to Mudcatville...we have missed ya!

Subject: RE: CATSPAW, we beseech thee
From: hesperis
Date: 28 Jun 01 - 09:38 PM

AWESOME!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!