BS: the Afterlife Test

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: GUEST,goats
Date: 24 Apr 05 - 07:00 PM

Let's try that again... I kid you not!

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Ebbie
Date: 24 Apr 05 - 07:11 PM

Hmmmmm, John Hardly. I'll have to look it up. It is possible that it was an image I formed in my youth...

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Ebbie
Date: 24 Apr 05 - 07:38 PM

This is all I've found so far. This is not in Revelations but in Matthew:

Matthew 25:32
All the nations will be gathered before Him, and He will separate them one from another, as a shepherd divides his sheep from the goats.
Matthew 25:33
And He will set the sheep on His right hand, but the goats on the left.

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: John Hardly
Date: 24 Apr 05 - 07:47 PM

That's good enough for me. I sure can't find my way around the Bible like I once could -- just didn't remember that kind of thing in Rev.

...and just to clarify what I said: I'd never argue that we aren't called God's "sheep" -- the only point I was "arguing" (though I was barely screaming at all) was that we aren't told to be like sheep. We are aptly described as sheep because we often do not think for ourselves, and it was also a very good contemporary picture for a caring God -- the picture of a shepherd.

...and, though I've seen very few "slasher" movies, everyone knows that goats represent the devil. I have it on the authority of Barnabas Collins.

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Scoville
Date: 24 Apr 05 - 07:52 PM

49 (Purgatory). How dull.

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Apr 05 - 09:23 PM

Your score is 42.

Ah, Mark Twain was right! See y'all later!

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Shanghaiceltic
Date: 24 Apr 05 - 10:23 PM

Your score is 39.

You are going straight to Hell! You appear to have the courage and conviction to live as an individual in a world that pressures you to become a conformist. You are a seeker of knowledge and an artist of life. Your future will never be peaceful, but you will be alive.

Ho hum, better get me asbestos underwear out!

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: freda underhill
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 03:29 AM

39 - me too, frank!

lucky i don't believe in hell.

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: *daylia*
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 07:45 AM

Not to worry folks - Hell sounds inviting! From the Test site:

Hell offers the finest in arts and entertainment, creativity and emotions, foremost among them love and suffering. Hell is by far the most colorful of the celestial realms.

The Realm of Hell is inhabited by myriad demon species. Upon entering the Gates of Hell, you will be greeted by a select breed of demons spawned in the River Chaos. [see the greeter pic brucie posted above hee hee]

Note: we admit to having our share of tormented souls, but the fire and brimstone stereotypes are unfounded.


There's lots of time prepare too. Right now I'm brushing up on the 7 Deadly Sins, C21 style (also from that same site);
   
"Greed - An excessive desire to acquire or possess more than what one needs or deserves, especially with respect to material wealth.

Envy - A feeling of discontent and resentment aroused by and in conjunction with desire for the possessions or qualities of another.

Dishonesty - Violation of truth or trust; a disposition to defraud, deceive, or betray.

Malice - A desire to harm others or to see others suffer; extreme ill will, spite, or hatred.

Oppression - Arbitrary, cruel, and unjust exercise of power or authority; subjugation by cruelty.

Intolerance - Refusal to recognize and respect differences in opinions or beliefs.

Conformity - Unquestioning adherence to a set of socially accepted thoughts, beliefs, and behavior."

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: *daylia*
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 09:14 AM

Oh yes, with all due respect to Moses, I wanted to get some feedback on the new and improved 10 Commandments taken from the Test site:

"Here are the Ten Commandments for the new age of the planet Earth,
in no particular order, because they are all important. We believe that the first draft of the Ten Commandments was too negatively worded, therefore we have given equal weight to both prohibitive and motivational commandments in this latest edition.
   
The "Shalt Nots"

Thou shalt not kill.
Thou shalt not steal.
Thou shalt not lie.
Thou shalt not hate.
Thou shalt not oppress.

   
The "Shalls"

Thou shall love.
Thou shall create.
Thou shall seek knowledge.
Thou shall have courage.
Thou shall know thyself."

I like 'em!

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Amos
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 09:27 AM

Me too!


A

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Don Firth
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 03:04 PM

46. Purgatory.

Actually, I was hoping for 42, the answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything.

It is said that W. C. Fields was pretty indifferent (if not downright hostile) to religion. While on his death-bed, a friend came to visit and found him thumbing through a copy of the Bible.

"I'm a bit surprised, Bill," said the friend. "I didn't think you believed in that sort of thing. What are you doing?"

Said Fields, "I'm looking for loopholes."

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: beardedbruce
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 04:24 PM

I guess there is no point in being balanced.....


"Your score is 50.

At present, it looks like you are headed to Purgatory. Your test results indicate that you have conflicting beliefs and actions. When these beliefs and actions merge harmoniously, you will find inner peace and embark on your journey to Heaven or Hell. "

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: GUEST,georgiansilver
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 04:30 PM

Goats to the left of me, sheep to the right and I guess. "I'm stuck in the middle with you". Oh God I love you!

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Peace
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 04:31 PM

So, for THIS you went to university?

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: GUEST,georgiansilver.
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 04:56 PM

I guess so!! I love you all. I love everyone....Oh am I so to be pitied? I love you all.

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Donuel
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 05:25 PM

I did not take the test but the title of this thread made me think that the after life for a born again Christian would be an after birth.

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Lin in Kansas
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 11:11 PM

Don,

My score was 42, but it didn't tell me anything I didn't already know. I guess the secret died with Douglas Adams, eh?

See ya there!

Lin

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Lin in Kansas
Date: 25 Apr 05 - 11:12 PM

Whoops!

Forgot to add that I'm also "slightly neurotic and somewhat enlightened" according to their psychology test, and am "Unholier than Thou," thank goodness!

Fun site. Thanks daylia.

Lin

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: dianavan
Date: 26 Apr 05 - 01:01 AM

The holier than thou test says:

Your score is 51.

You are remarkably average, and therefore are neither Holy nor Unholy compared to other humans. Play it cool, and you may be able to sneak through the gates unnoticed.

Thats about right, I'd say.

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: dianavan
Date: 26 Apr 05 - 01:05 AM

The neurosis pwychology test says:

Your score is 42.

You are slightly neurotic, and fairly enlightened as well.

Hmmmmm.........?

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Blissfully Ignorant
Date: 26 Apr 05 - 01:20 PM

Your score is 38.

You seem to be completely sane to us. Congratulations on being an enlightened individual!

THat's the neurotic test...I passed the unholier than thou, too. I'm unholier than thou!!!

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Davetnova
Date: 26 Apr 05 - 01:36 PM

Ebbie - Re.- Cats and tongues? Does this mean never share a joint after oral sex?

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Ebbie
Date: 26 Apr 05 - 01:42 PM

If everyone eats garlic, no one is offended. :)

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Raggytash
Date: 26 Apr 05 - 03:29 PM

Looks like I'll have a lot of people to talk to down there (score 40), I did it a second time (just for devilment) and scored a moderately decent 99

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: *daylia*
Date: 27 Apr 05 - 10:48 AM

Apparently I'm "slightly neurotic but fairly enlightened" as well (maybe it's from taking too many tests like these!)   I'm also neither holey nor unholey. HA! What do they know...

Subject: RE: BS: the Afterlife Test
From: Firecat
Date: 27 Apr 05 - 04:21 PM

Your score is 57.

At present, it looks like you are headed to Purgatory. Your test results indicate that you have conflicting beliefs and actions. When these beliefs and actions merge harmoniously, you will find inner peace and embark on your journey to Heaven or Hell.


Yeah right!