membership

Subject: membership
From: guitar
Date: 24 May 07 - 12:04 PM

ach I am just fed up, I'm thinking about my membership of the mudcat cafe, I mean there are good people out there and yet, every now and then I get gubbed ( ganged up on) by some members of the mudcat cafe, and i'm sewriously thinkinh about why I should take this, I did it before and some days i wasn't a member and then I thought what the hell, you will always get arseholes no matter where you go, including here, I can admit that I'm an arsehole sometimes and get really angry, but I just angry at people that don't listen or read my posts closely

Subject: RE: membership
From: Darowyn
Date: 24 May 07 - 12:07 PM

You know, it's killing me trying not to post something based on just one or two words in your post, as a wind-up!
But I turn my back on temptation...
Cheers
Dave

Subject: RE: membership
From: guitar
Date: 24 May 07 - 12:23 PM

This is not a joke

Subject: RE: membership
From: guitar
Date: 24 May 07 - 12:24 PM

ach waht the hell, I might as well take it on the chin

Subject: RE: membership
From: Bill D
Date: 24 May 07 - 12:37 PM

Hundreds of individuals, all reacting to a discussion forum in their own peculiar way.
When someone disagrees with you, it can mean they are stupid, careless, confused and mean.....or that you are.
A difference of opinion 'can' be looked at as an opportunity to find out which.

Subject: RE: membership
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 24 May 07 - 12:59 PM

I expect a lot of people feel like this at times. Have you thought about (just for a few weeks) only contributing to threads that appear "safe" i.e. the trivial ones where nothing controversial is going on?

just angry at people that don't listen or read my posts closely

Some people will never listen to or read things closely because they are only interested in their own opinion and what they have to say. The best thing to do is to try and accept that that is bound to happen on a site like this and if a particular discussion is getting you down then make a promise to yourself not to go there again - let them all get on with it.

You could just logout and choose a guest name for a few weeks until you feel a bit better about it all - but it sounds as if you've done that before.

It would be a real shame if you left completely.

Subject: RE: membership
From: gnu
Date: 24 May 07 - 01:20 PM

Ya gotta take the bad with the good. But, ya don't have ta, and shouldn't, take it personal.

I have lost my cool here many times.... but, it's getting less frequent. Give it time and try to be patient. It'll pay off in the end.

Subject: RE: membership
From: Wesley S
Date: 24 May 07 - 02:10 PM

Anyone who has an opinion - and shares it on the www - is bound to be able to find someone who will disagree with that opinion. Overall most of us think the Mudcat is worth it. But if you were hoping to find a place where everyone agreed with you all the time - then the Mudcat isn't it. And just because someone doesn't agree with you doesn't make them an "arsehole".

Subject: RE: membership
From: LesB
Date: 24 May 07 - 02:21 PM

Guitar, does anybody care?
Cheers
Les

Subject: RE: membership
From: An Buachaill Caol Dubh
Date: 24 May 07 - 02:27 PM

Hey, guitar: I tend to agree most with eanjay and the gnu; on a purely practical level, given that it's generally best to have something than not (except multiple fractures and various diseases), why give up on visiting? I've learnt loads by visiting here, and laughed a bit, as well as noticing that what you (and others) say about people not reading accurately is sometimes true; just like many people use the time when someone alse is speaking primarily as the time when they think what to say next...... Never give up!

Subject: RE: membership
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 24 May 07 - 02:29 PM

I don't think he's asking if people care, I think he's just trying to express his feelings and "work this out". Doing that can help people to make a decision about something.

Subject: RE: membership
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 24 May 07 - 02:29 PM

With respect, guitar, you have said some things that have been, well, mmm, politely,   a bit off the usual scale if you see what I mean.

Subject: RE: membership
From: LesB
Date: 24 May 07 - 02:32 PM

Why express his feelings in public? Get on with life. Do it or don't do it. Simple realy. Sorry to be so blunt.
Les

Subject: RE: membership
From: Megan L
Date: 24 May 07 - 02:33 PM

Gnu me darlin beuy you losin yer cool jing wha wid ever believe sic a thing sure aren't ye the personification o cool.

*Ducks and heads out the door before I get an Irish Canadian skelp :p

Subject: RE: membership
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 24 May 07 - 02:38 PM

Hi Les, I only assumed that he was expressing his feelings, I could be totally wrong. A lot of people do seem to do that here and it definitely seems to help them. Other people wouldn't dream of doing it. I suppose the beauty of a forum like this is that there is always that opportunity if you need it. Jean

Subject: RE: membership
From: LesB
Date: 24 May 07 - 03:02 PM

That being the case, maybe this thread should be in the B.S. section.
Cheers
Les

Subject: RE: membership
From: PoppaGator
Date: 24 May 07 - 03:06 PM

No need to quit, just ignore us for a while ~ or forever. If and when you decide to poke your virtual nose back in, you can "lurk" if you wish (i.e., read but not write), and if you decide to weigh in on some discussion or another, your "identity" (fake name) will be ready and waiting for you to use it.

I've disappeared for months at a time and come back. No big deal. In my case it was never a matter of bad feelings about Mudcat and/or fellow members, just that other aspects of my life were more pressing and/or interesting. But regardless of one's reason, anyone can opt in or out whenever they wish.

Try not to take things so seriously. And when you can't help but be serious about something, and you feel that another correspondent has failed to see your point or to respond appropriately, feel free to sound off, explain yourself in fuller detail, scold the person for their insensitivity, whatever. Some of us will pay attention, others won't ~ who cares?

Also, try not to take things so personally. You're on the right track by not using your real-life name. Think of "guitar" as a separate personality, not your complete and essential self ~ like a role you're playing on stage. Electronic exchange of text-only messages is always going to involve at least a little bit of misunderstanding, because we can't share facial expressions, tone of voice, etc., to indicate shades of meaning. So, in a context where communications and understanding have certain limits, recognize that your participation is also limited, and your own reactions (hurt feelings or whatever) should be taken with the proverbial grain of salt.

PS ~ shouldn't this be filed under BS? Not saying it isn't serious ~ but it certainly isn't music.

Subject: RE: membership
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 24 May 07 - 03:27 PM

anyone can opt in or out whenever they wish

That's another good thing about a site like this. The trouble is that if the computer is on there's always that temptation to just pop back. Sometimes I just turn the computer off when I've finished doing the essentials and then it's easy to resist the temptation. Definitely is easy to do with my computer because it takes so long to load that once it's off I just can't be bothered to put it back on!

Subject: RE: membership
From: Peace
Date: 24 May 07 - 03:28 PM

But guitars make music. Cogito ergo sum sunt ubi veni, vidi, video!

Subject: RE: membership
From: gnu
Date: 24 May 07 - 03:29 PM

Megan... thank you for your wise and kind comments.

It's true and I admit it. The Wildebeeste doesn't come out as often, but.... ye never know, eh?

Subject: RE: membership
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 24 May 07 - 04:12 PM

The world is a stage and every man/woman..................

Subject: RE: membership
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 24 May 07 - 04:28 PM

"Are you lonesome tonight..."

Subject: RE: membership
From: Big Mick
Date: 24 May 07 - 07:36 PM

Perhaps when you cast aspersions on people, such as in the Bobby Sands thread, then immediately thereafter you tell us we should all get along, then a couple of posts later you go crazy insulting folks with an opinion different than yours, then directly after you ask folks to get along. Getting the drift? There is a name for this, and you might want to consider looking into it.

Subject: RE: membership
From: Gurney
Date: 25 May 07 - 05:37 AM

This site is like Democracy, you may think it's bad, -until you try something else.

I like it here. Moderation is moderate, most people seem mature, wit and humour is encouraged, and posters know a LOT.

Subject: RE: membership
From: guitar
Date: 25 May 07 - 06:06 AM

thaks for your advice, I'll now go and think about it, and I know that sometimes, I get a bit angry and shout my mouth off because there are times when I act like an arsehole, because sometimes I'm one, and I say things that aren't right, so I'll try and stick to the 'safe' ones and see how I get on

Subject: RE: membership
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 25 May 07 - 09:30 AM

Glad to see you're not leaving. You'll probably enjoy it a lot more just staying with the "safe" threads - and don't be so harsh with yourself. I must say that I read and re-read anything before I post it just to make sure that I don't post something in a hurry that I'll regret later. If someone disagrees with me then when I reply I make a point of being really nice about it. Believe it or not you'll feel better afterwards. You'll also be able to walk around with a halo!

Good luck.

Subject: RE: membership
From: Bee
Date: 25 May 07 - 09:42 AM

While there are arseholes about, most of us are just posting-while-cranky sometimes.

Subject: RE: membership
From: guitar
Date: 25 May 07 - 10:28 AM

thanks, I'll stay

Subject: RE: membership
From: wysiwyg
Date: 25 May 07 - 10:50 AM

Maybe it will help for some of us to be aware that you're trying a fresh start. Mudcat's always been generous about that, or tried to be for the most part.

~Susan

Subject: RE: membership
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 25 May 07 - 10:52 AM

Guitar, nobody should quit Mudcat because of a few harsh comments. We give 'em, and we have to expect to take 'em.

Remember, virtual kicks only hurt if you let them.

Even nice folks row occasionally, but these things have a way of getting sorted, so ask yourself whether Mudcat with all its faults is bad enough to want to quit. I'll bet a stack the answer is NO!

Don T.

Subject: RE: membership
From: guitar
Date: 25 May 07 - 11:05 AM

I think that I might need to have a thick skin and just turn the other cheek

Subject: RE: membership
From: Bee
Date: 25 May 07 - 12:26 PM

No mooning, now, guitar!

Subject: RE: membership
From: guitar
Date: 26 May 07 - 10:32 AM

very funny I like that

Subject: RE: membership
From: Megan L
Date: 26 May 07 - 12:06 PM

Ach bee you spoil all oor fun as an auld wifie i hae tae tak me thrills whaur i kin get them :p