The Gift of Life

Subject: The Gift of Life
From: Paul Mills
Date: 12 Jul 07 - 10:39 PM

Hello Friends...

As you may know, I'm only an occasional poster here but I have been fortunate to experience the support of this community many times in the past and I wanted to share with you a story of incredible courage and community.

A couple of weeks ago, my son-in-law, David Lough started to experience a bit of fever. He stayed home from work but by Thursday of that week started to notice blood in his urine. The next day, my daughter checked him into the hospital. They quickly determined that he had a liver condition and that Sunday he was transported to Toronto General Hospital's transplant unit.

Sunday night, we were informed that he had to have a transplant within 48 hours or he would die. Many calls were made and emails sent and the next morning, 11 potential donors showed up at the hospital. (You have to understand here that the liver is an organ that can regenerate itself. A liver transplant can be received from a living donor: part of their liver is transplanted into the recipient and within 6-8 weeks both livers can regenerate themselves to their original size).

The evaluation of potential donors was understandably swift and by the end of the day a week ago Monday, a donor was selected. It turned out to be Ellen Long, singer Eve Goldberg's partner and a pillar of the Toronto folk community. By this time Dave's liver had ceased functioning and he was on life support. The next day, Ellen and then Dave were wheeled into separate operating rooms and the procedure began. By the end of the day, 60% of Ellen's liver was removed and transplanted into Dave. Both survived.

All this time, the positive healing energy of the Canadian folk community (which had been informed through the Maplepost listserve) plus the family networks of Dave and Sarah (our daughter) was coming to bear on the circumstances and, I'm convinced, led to a positive outcome. Here we are more than a week later and the donor, Ellen, is back home and doing very well. It took Dave four days to awaken from the surgery, but today, we visited him in the hospital and he was alert and starting to get out of bed and walk the corridors.

Miracles happen, my friends, and here we have many examples. This crisis happened during a holiday weekend in Canada and somehow, the right donor was found, the best transplant surgical team in Canada was mustered and the operation was pulled off.

Dave is not out of the woods yet, though, as researchers try to determine what caused this very rapid liver failure. We hope and pray that the transplant has solved the problem.

May I ask any of you who pray or otherwise seek the help of larger forces to keep Dave Lough and Ellen Long in your thoughts over the next while? They are both heroes.

Count your blessings...life is fragile and things can change so rapidly. I'm sure there are many of you who have gone through similar experiences and I would love to hear your stories.

Paul Mills

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Beer
Date: 12 Jul 07 - 10:46 PM

You've said it all.
and best wishes to all.
Beer (adrien)

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: katlaughing
Date: 12 Jul 07 - 10:48 PM

Incredible. Thanks, Paul, so much for sharing with us. Good thoughts and thanks givings for all of you.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: KT
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 12:06 AM

Beautiful. Thanks, Paul, and know that all are being held in thought and prayer.

KT

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 04:19 AM

another medical miracle. best wishes to all concerned

sandra

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: alanabit
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 04:23 AM

My God, that is inspiring. We hear so much about bad stuff people have done. I would like to hear more stories like this one.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 04:25 AM

I agree, what an inspiring story. Best wishes for a speedy recover for both!

Love Khatt

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 04:31 AM

Thanks for sharing this Paul. Good thoughts and wishes for them both.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 04:38 AM

Best wishes.

But now I am wondering - will there be any side effects? Will he sing soprano?

:-P

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Jeri
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 11:42 AM

This is one of those stories that just don't happen in real life. This is amazing, and I'm so happy the gloomy day turned around so be so dramatically bright. Life is fragile, but it's also persistent and will find any way there may be. I'm glad to know that life has won out and you're a member of such a caring community.

Here's to Paul and Ellen and all in your families!

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: MMario
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 11:45 AM

what Jeri said.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: SINSULL
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 11:49 AM

Keeping both in my thoughts and prayers.
Mary

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: balladeer
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 11:53 AM

When Paul first put the word out that Dave needed a transplant within 48 hours or he would die, the world froze for me. Dave and Sarah are the parents of a three-year-old child, and that gave the story even greater enormity in my mind. I'm very happy today that Sarah has her husband, Don and Joan have their son, and that carefree litle girl has her daddy. Joanne

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Celtaddict
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 12:03 PM

What a wonderful story!
Thank you, Paul, for sharing it.
Every blessing on every single person involved in this wonder!

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Ebbie
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 12:48 PM

Altruism at its finest. Thank you for sharing your story with us.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 01:10 PM

That's an amazing story. It's inspiring to hear of the Canadian folk community pulling together like this. I salute Ellen for her courage and generosity.

I have an old friend who had to do something similar when his son experienced kidney failure. He had one kidney removed and transplanted to the son, and both of them are now doing fine. It takes a lot of guts to do that (no pun intended).   And a lot of love.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Wesley S
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 01:12 PM

A great story - thanks for the lift.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: heric
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 01:34 PM

This is an extraordinay story on so many levels. I will be thinking about it for a long time.

(One thing they don't tell you much is that in the States, if you donate an organ e.g. kidney, you can thereafter be screwed for private insurance, absent group health entitlement.)

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: MBSLynne
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 01:41 PM

Relieving to know that there are people around who will give of themselves, quite literally, without hesitation to help someone else. So glad it has all worked out so well and I sincerely hope it continues so.

Love Lynne

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: catspaw49
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 02:51 PM

Sometimes the "fates" seem to align at just the right time........and here we have such a wonderful case! Inspiring of course but also a perfect example of one of those alignments.

Life is so very fragile in many ways. Had just one element been even slightly different the result may not have been the same. Whatever it is you believe in, say a thanks for this one.

Spaw

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: black walnut
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 03:28 PM

It's all been said, but the story is still unfolding, so let me add once again my agreement to what's been said above and reaffirm our support and caring...bless you ALL.

~b.w.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: bobad
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 07:23 PM

Wonderful!

Best wishes for a positive outcome for all involved and let me add my kudos to the oft maligned Canadian health care system.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 07:32 PM

Well, I always got the feeling the Toronto folk scene had something special about it, from reading Rick Fielding and all on the Mudcat.

This episode confirms that beyond my dreams. Thanks for telling us about it.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: gnu
Date: 13 Jul 07 - 07:33 PM

Sniff... thoughts and prayers.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: jacqui.c
Date: 14 Jul 07 - 07:34 AM

What gnu said.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Paul Mills
Date: 14 Jul 07 - 11:18 AM

Thank you all so much for your thoughts, prayers and positive healing energy. It's all working.

Yesterday Dave was sitting up and taking solid food. He is in good spirits and, while they still don't know the cause for sure, the doctors are feeling positive about a good prognosis.

Last night, Lucy Bowers held an off-season song circle to celebrate this wonderful story and about 30 Toronto folkies showed up including Eve and our hero, Ellen. It was a joyous and emotional evening, as you can imagine.

I'm feeling that famous Mudcat group hug and it's wonderful!

Thank you!

Paul

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Peace
Date: 14 Jul 07 - 12:00 PM

Just back from being outta town. I'm very happy things worked out, Paul. For all of you.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: GUEST,chinmusic
Date: 14 Jul 07 - 01:24 PM

Last night's gathering at Lucy's was emotional and heartfelt... Yet, it was also marked with great humour, and a celebratory sense of the occasion....    Of course, music was the conduit in which to channel our expression of gratitude and love for Ellen, and hope for the speedy recovery of David..... I felt it a privilege to be in the company of so many caring, and wonderful friends..... This community has enriched my life in so many ways.....

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: balladeer
Date: 14 Jul 07 - 01:48 PM

It was a big thrill when Ellen walked into the room at Lucy's, looking even more beautiful than she did before she had sixty-five percent of her liver removed ten days ago.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Big Mick
Date: 16 Jul 07 - 03:58 PM

Paul, my dear friend and fellow Beef Brother, I am without internet just now as we are still getting settled back in Michigan, and concurrently I am organizing packinghouse workers in South Dakota. So I have had to get my information in spurts.

First, thanks to one of my closest friends, Jeri, for letting me know this. She is aware that I am out of touch a lot right now, and she tracked me down. I love ya, woman.

And thanks to Joanne for letting me know about this thread. I am not online much right now, so I very much appreciate it.

It does not surprise me at all that Ellen stepped up, and I am profoundly grateful that she did. When one meets Ellen and Eve, they can but wish for that kind of quality in their own relationships. These are kind and loving folks, and as recent events attest, heroic folks as well. Ellen, you are an angel right in our midst. Eve, I cannot imagine what it must have been like to watch your beloved life partner go under the knife, and risk her life, to help another. It must have been the most confusing mix of fear, love and pride ever.

Ellen, the gratitude I feel is that of a friend who has received the pictures of this man's daughter, and felt the love and pride that Paul and Bev took in this child and her parents. Had it not been for you, my dear friends who are so very full of love and joy, would have experienced the grief that only great hearts can feel. Your willingness to risk yourself to help another had far greater impact than you will ever know. I have only met you briefly, but if I am any judge, you are not comfortable in the role of hero. Fair enough, I understand that as this is what decent people do. But please except the title of Angel, and allow us to use you as an example of what decent, principled, caring and loving people live like. I am proud to know you.

Paul and Bev, I don't think I have to tell you that I cherish our friendship, and that you have been squarely in my prayers, and those of my family from the first minute I heard of all this. I look forward to seeing you soon, but until then know that you are always in my thoughts.

All the best,

Mick

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: balladeer
Date: 16 Jul 07 - 10:48 PM

Great to hear what you have to say, Mick. Always.
Joanne

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Paul Mills
Date: 16 Jul 07 - 10:53 PM

Thanks, Mick...nobody has a bigger heart than you, my friend.

Paul

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: JedMarum
Date: 23 Jul 07 - 03:37 PM

Thank goodness things have worked out. Ellen has given such a gift to Dave and to his family. God Bless them all! I wish them all the very best for complete and rapid recoveries.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Pistachio
Date: 23 Jul 07 - 05:58 PM

More mudcat magic - great to hear good news. Best wishes to all.
Hazel.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: GUEST,ibo
Date: 23 Jul 07 - 08:57 PM

stories like this make a man humble,thanks and best wishes

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Tinker
Date: 23 Jul 07 - 09:44 PM

I've been off with a group of teens and internet "free" .... But know that your story is heard and your hearts held close. Having visited your home Paul, it is already filled with love, laughter and music. some of the best energy around. If it's possible to send off a booster shot consider it done...

Love and hugs all around

tink

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Peter T.
Date: 27 Jul 07 - 08:55 PM

Blessings on you and yours, Paul, what a great story -- but why am I not that surprised, given the history of the Toronto folk community, and the special Eve/Ellen/Goldberg universal sunshine..... when things get bad, the Toronto folk community is there in full force (and in this case, in the special force of one).

It is also perhaps worth pointing out that there is a larger community that helped: it is called Canada, and it decided to create a free health care service for its citizens.

yours ever,

Peter T.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: folk1e
Date: 28 Jul 07 - 07:08 PM

It reminds me of a line from one of Roy Bailey's songs ".... give the best part of yourself to your friends and they'l do the same to you!"
What goes round eh?
I don't know you guys personally, but all the best from over the pond!

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Donuel
Date: 29 Jul 07 - 12:35 PM

ITs wonderful when love prevails. Best wishes and great days to come from me and my family.

Subject: RE: The Gift of Life
From: Paul Mills
Date: 29 Jul 07 - 11:16 PM

Hello Friends.....

Thank you all again for your wonderful support! It's been a while since I posted to this thread so I thought an update was in order.

The news here continues to be positive. Dave is continuing to beat the odds! There was a complication a week after the transplant... he developed pancreatitis which was a major concern and totally inhibited his ability to get up and walk and eat normally. Both of these things slowed his recovery significantly. It now appears that the pancreatitis is gone and he is now able to exercise and eat. The improvement is astonishing. We are hoping that Dave will be back home in a week or two.

The donor, Ellen Long, is back at work on a part-time basis and is feeling great. She will continue to be a saint as far as we are concerned.

Peter T, I echo your comments about the strength of our community here and also the blessing of our wonderful Canadian health system. I shudder to think how many tens of thousands of dollars this would have cost south of the border! Not that that would have stopped us, but...

Thank you again for all of your positive thoughts and support!

Paul Mills