BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)

Subject: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: michaelr
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 12:19 PM

Is it appropriate to begin a business letter "Dear --" if one doesn't know the adressee? It seems awkward to me to pretend that a total stranger is dear to me.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Noreen
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 12:41 PM

That is the traditional correct form of address.

Even 'Dear Sir or Madam', when you obviously didn't even know who you were writing to :)

Why, how else would you start a letter?

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: kendall
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 12:47 PM

Greetings:

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Greg F.
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 12:53 PM

That's only from Uncle Sam.........

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: MMario
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 01:10 PM

you may also just use their title, for example:



Mr. Spiegal:

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: kendall
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 01:15 PM

Who says it's only for Uncle Sam?

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Amos
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 01:37 PM

Traditionally, yes, it is.

Modernists can use anything, including, "Hi, Mr. Smith" or "Howdy!" or "Hello", or "HEY! SMITH!".

Depends on the context, I guess.

But there's no dearness in the "Dear"--it's a social form only.


A

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: mousethief
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 01:46 PM

Don't say "My Dear" though -- "My Dear Senator Helms" probably isn't the right way to start the letter, unless you're a lobbyist who donated heavily to his campaign coffers and is looking to call a favor in.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 02:51 PM

Does this bear any resemblance to UK practice?

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: GUEST,999
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 02:52 PM

Once received a letter addressed

Dear Occupant.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 03:16 PM

My wife once received a whole batch of letters from one particular organisation (I have a feeling it was Readers' Digest) which all began "Dear Mrs Nm..." N.M. are the initials of her first names.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: mousethief
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 03:17 PM

"Dear Occupant" is a perfectly acceptable way to start a letter. Seems odd but you just have to not take "Dear" literally.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 03:43 PM

In the UK,if you begin with Dear Sir, you end with Yours faithfully.
If it's Dear Mr Smith, you end with Yours sincerely.
None of this means that the person is dear to you, nor that you will necessarily be faithful to them, or indeed are particularly sincere!
I suppose in time we'll be using "Yo,Dude!" or some such.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 04:10 PM

Here in Indiana, I'll go with "Dear", even to my despised ex-son-in-law.

Wishing you all the very best,
    I remain, as always,
       Your most faithful and obedient servant,

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: kendall
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 04:16 PM

If I know the recipient and I like them I use Dear....but if it is a business or someone I don't know or like, it's Greetings. Screw tradition.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: GUEST,mg
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 05:20 PM

I will someitmes say something like dear staff or dear committee...mg

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 06:28 PM

It really royally pisses me off when I receive a letter from my bank, my insurance company, or any other such which begins Dear Donald.

It has taken me sixty nine years to achieve the proper gravitas of seniority, and I expect correspondents to accord me the courtesy of addressing me in a manner appropriate for those who are neither friend nor family. Also, nobody in the latter group calls me Donald, since I have always preferred Don.

When I am in my doctor's office, he calls me Don because he is a long time friend as well as my GP. When I go into hospital, and they ask how I prefer to be addressed, the answer is "Mr Thompson".

There is a place for familiarity and a place for formality, but unfortunately the line gets steadily more blurred.

Don T.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 06:41 PM

The daftest thing I've come across is a letter starting "Dear the late Mr..."

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: kendall
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 07:15 PM

The girls at my car insurance company call me Dear. I reply with Sweetie.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Bobert
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 08:27 PM

Yeah, I know it sounds dumb because it is but...

... "Dear Sir or Madam" is the way I learned it...

Me???

I like...

..."Yo..."

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 08 Dec 10 - 08:27 PM

Actually thinking it over that letter actually started "Dear Mr...", but it was in an envelope addressed to us as "the executors of the late Mr..."

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: michaelr
Date: 09 Dec 10 - 12:26 AM

Dearly beloved,

thank you all so much for your contributions.

Best regards,

Michael

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: GUEST,Patsy
Date: 09 Dec 10 - 08:13 AM

All letters I receive begin with Dear so I just follow suit. I think dear is general and I am sure that no-one takes much notice. On saying that I hate being called 'Dear madam' it makes me feel that I am the lady in-charge of a brothel.

If it starts with Hi it is generally a young company after your money.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Bonzo3legs
Date: 09 Dec 10 - 09:07 AM

Our traditions are gradually being eroded by so called modernists. They can go to hell, the only aspect of my letter writing I will change is to type on a PC instead of writing.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: GUEST,kendall
Date: 09 Dec 10 - 09:21 AM

I save that term of DEAR for those who are dear.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Midchuck
Date: 09 Dec 10 - 11:42 AM

When I was told that I couldn't start a letter with "Listen, you pack of thieves," or "You Damned Besotted Churl," it took all the fun out of writing letters. So I don't.

P.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: GUEST,Doc John
Date: 09 Dec 10 - 12:57 PM

Problem is when you receive a letteg signed 'Yours faithfully, J. Smith'; how do you reply? I sometimes receive 'Yours faithfully, [illegible scrawl]'; I've taken to replying 'Dear [copy of illegible scrawl].
The Queen begins: 'To Our Trusty and Wellbeloved.....Greeting!' Don't forget the !. Not that I receive all that much from Mrs Windsor except when she's masquerading as Her Majesty's Revenue and Customs and then she doesn't bother to sign at all.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 09 Dec 10 - 04:21 PM

I was taught, way back in the Pleistocene Age, to greet non-family, non-friend individual recipients whom I don't know with "Dear Mr.(or Mrs.) Blahblah.

If I was addressing a company or institution rather than an individual, it was to be "Gentlemen:"   

And that's what I do. Never mind that the individual(s) is/are not dear to me. And never mind that the institutional reader (or the institution's leaders, whom I am addressing by proxy) are or are not male. And never mind that, even if I know them to be male, I may doubt that they are "gentlemen".

If orally addressing a mixed-gender group in a semiformal situation, I'll begin with "Ladies and gentlemen". Maybe they're neither, but so what?

Those greetings are merely forms, honored by long usage, which are not expected to be taken literally. They are understood to be no more meaningful than greeting someone with "How are you?" when you don't care how they are. And no more sincere than taking leave with "Goodbye", which historically would be "God be with you", which I don't necessarily expect, nor indeed perhaps wish!

Forms and little formalities like those are the great friends of civility, which we all could profit by having a great deal more of.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Joe_F
Date: 09 Dec 10 - 06:24 PM

When I was about 6, during the war, I wrote a letter to Hitler, and I was not going to be tricked by any mere convention into calling him "Dear". I made it "Nasty Hitler:".

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: GUEST,999
Date: 09 Dec 10 - 06:24 PM

I especially dislike being addressed as Dear Sir. After all, I`ve yet to be knighted.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Janie
Date: 09 Dec 10 - 11:53 PM

Call me anything you want, except please don't call me late for supper.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: gnomad
Date: 10 Dec 10 - 03:49 AM

I would rather be dear than cheap.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: GUEST,Patsy
Date: 10 Dec 10 - 04:07 AM

Ending a letter is more of a stress for me. I normally end it yours sincerely. But then I wonder if it should have been faithfully, truly or best regards or just regards. Then should I sign it formally or print my name?

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: meself
Date: 10 Dec 10 - 10:33 AM

In North American convention - and I assume U.K. as well - any of those "complimentary closings" is appropriate for any kind of letter, and there is no significant difference in meaning or implication among them (although "faithfully" is not commonly used in N. Am., so it may come across as quaint). So - use whichever one tickles your fancy.

After the complimentary closing, sign your name. If it is a "business letter", print (or type) your name underneath your signature. This is unnecessary in a "friendly letter", unless your signature is illegible AND you have reason to believe the reader will not have figured out who you are by the end of the letter.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: mousethief
Date: 10 Dec 10 - 01:25 PM

I especially dislike being addressed as Dear Sir. After all, I`ve yet to be knighted.

Perhaps you are unfamiliar with the truth that some words have more than one meaning?

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: GUEST,999
Date: 10 Dec 10 - 01:29 PM

`Perhaps you are unfamiliar with the truth that some words have more than one meaning?`

Dang. I wonder what they`ll think of next.

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: SharonA
Date: 10 Dec 10 - 05:48 PM

Dear N.D. Hedlightz,

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Slag
Date: 10 Dec 10 - 07:38 PM

How about: YOU may already be a WINNER!?
or:
"My Dearest Darling Miss Pringle", just to stir things up a little!?
**********************************
Actually "Dear" is the standard.
**********************************
Not mentioned but also acceptable is: To Whom It May Concern, as in

Webley Widgets
Sprockets Division
1234 Whataboutit Pkwy
Nothing AZ 85353

To Whom It May Concern:

**********************************

Standards also include:


Company Name
Address
City (2 Cap Letter State Code [no comma]) ZIP+4
Person's Name
Title and/or Department
(skip a line)
Dear Mr. So and So

or
My Dear Mr. So and So

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 11 Dec 10 - 12:35 PM

I prefer just a salutary "Hello:" (colon because it's a business letter; if not, then a comma).

Personal letters I start with "Salu" -- can't remember where I acquired that.

Linn

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 11 Dec 10 - 12:46 PM

When and why did this thread get retitled "Letter writing etiquette (US)"? Comparing notes around the global Mudcattery is interesting stuff, why be parochial about this kind of thing?

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: s&r
Date: 12 Dec 10 - 11:36 AM

Complementary closures are ending phrases that are used commonly as pairs with opening salutation.

I and many others were taught:
Dear Sir.....Yours faithfully

Dear [name] .....yours sincerely.

They are conventions and are often part of the house style of an organisation together with concepts such as block paragraphs and open punctuation. Generally I prefer:

Addressee
Position
Organisation

             Subject of Letter

Letter.....................
............

My name
Position

Stu

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: michaelr
Date: 12 Dec 10 - 03:49 PM

Dear Mc Grath:

That was my original title; I assumed conventions would not necessarily be the same both sides of the pond.

Sinerely,
Michael

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: kendall
Date: 12 Dec 10 - 04:54 PM

My Grandfather once started a letter with "You insignificant bastard....

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 12 Dec 10 - 06:26 PM

Well, Kendall, he obviously just tried to use a salutation that was most appropriate...

Linn

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: saulgoldie
Date: 13 Dec 10 - 10:01 AM

First, you lay out your Rhodia paper and Montegrappa fountain pen. After that, it's hard to go wrong.

Saul

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 13 Dec 10 - 10:24 AM

"Rhodia paper and Montegrippa pen".

Are those brands or types good, bad, or indifferent?

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Letter writing etiquette (US)
From: saulgoldie
Date: 13 Dec 10 - 11:36 AM

Rhodia paper is high quality paper that takes a fountain pen well. A Montegrappa fountain pen is a very nice pen with which to put your words on that fine page. Writing a letter in this manner is a vastly different experience for the writer in many ways. And the reader, if they know anything, would greatly appreciate receiving such a letter. Much more personal than an email, or even a typed letter.

Saul