BS: Atheists

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Jeri
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 10:28 AM

Dan, I thought you were better than this.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 06:24 AM

""Weird thread. I don't believe in god, but have no compulsion to attack anyone who does (or even have a conversation about it for that matter).""

One of the very few intelligent posts.

I do believe in God, but I'm more likely to be attacking extreme believers than atheists.

Don T.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 06:21 AM

There are things we don't yet understand about the Universe and some of those things can appear to be dark, scary, dangerous and mysterious. Religion exploits this feeling of vulnerability that we have by proposing a deity who will shield us from the menace of the mysterious. It's a deity, though, who must be both comforting and menacing at the same time. He will protect us and, eventually, provide us with an eternal home away from all insecurity. It's a very alluring prospect. You don't need to have believer genes to be taken in by that, any more than I need money-lust genes to be excited by winning the lottery. But you mustn't reject him, as he then becomes far fiercer, more menacing and vengeful than those dark mysteries could ever manage.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 06:18 AM

""In that case I find it unlikely that this thread was aimed at you.""

A thread specifically debunking atheists wasn't aimed at an atheist? How does that follow?

""I don't get the jokes either. But I don't think that good people call sane people delusional.""

I'm not an atheist, but I wouldn't call religious fundamentalists or Creationists sane.

Don T.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 06:12 AM

Spiritual Safety Tip

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 06:00 AM

Elude.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 05:55 AM

Atheism is a celebration of human inventiveness which recognises that God & religion only exist on account of those human beings who made it up in the first place and those who've seen fit (for whatever reason) to propagate it thereafter. There's a lot of fine things about religion - the music, the architecture, the fixtures & fittings, the scriptures &c. - which the Atheist appreciates in terms of aforementioned human inventiveness. Even I may stand before the Papyrus P52 exhibit in Manchester's Ryland's Library in a state of reverential awe, but that has nothing to do with belief in anything other than the immediate human reality & cultural history as manifest in the thing.

Atheism is an inclusive philosophy that allows for a more objective view of such matters entirely divorced from the superstition of belief, which is a quaintly folkloric delusion on the one hand, yet more than a tad provincial on the other given the diversity of human cultural / spiritual experience from which we may deduce the wellsprings & motives of organised religion, whatever the stripe. In many ways The God Concept is as much an achievement as Stonehenge, the Pyramids and the Large Hadron Collider; God is born from a dynamic Myth Process which then becomes ossified by absolutism by those for whom stasis equates with Tradition and are prepared to kill or otherwise oppress for its preservation.      

We are all of us spiritual beings; our spirituality is as unique to us as our sexuality. That Religion seeks to exploit the former in the same way as Pornography seeks to exploit the latter is but one of the misfortunes of Human Culture (along with War, The Tory Party, UKIP, EDL, the Daily Mail, etc.) which, on the evidence hitherto, must always have a Dark Side. The nature of our subjective spirituality is experienced in terms of wonder, beauty, joy, awe, our capacity for music, art, poetry, howling at the moon, weeping over the the birth of our children and the death of loved ones and pondering the Fortean in terms of what might often allude simple explanation. This much is common to all, yet unique to each of us.

Atheism presupposes that we've outgrown the need for the comfort blanket of Belief, just as Anarchy presupposes we've outgrown the need for Government. Both are optimistic glimpses of future possibility that take a very happy view indeed of human potential, however so naive that may be to the reactionary detractors for whom such enlightenment is anathema to an arrogant self-centred world view born from both pig ignorance and the fear that death might just be the end of it after all.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 05:53 AM

Hey, some of the people I respect most, are atheists.

In that case, Joe, I thank God I'm an atheist.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 05:52 AM

I don't get all of there either, but I like the fly joke. Not everyone sees humor in the same way.

Atheist Jokes

Why did the atheist cross the road?
He thought there might be a street on the other side, but he wouldn't believe it until he tested his hypothesis.



Why did the atheist throw her watch out the window?
She wanted to see if it was designed intelligently enough to evolve into a bird.



A minister, a priest, a rabbi, and an atheist meet in a bar at 10:00 a.m. The bartender asks the minister what he'll have, and the minister orders a martini. The priest also orders a martini, as does the rabbi. When the bartender asks the atheist what he wants, the atheist says he'd like a cup of coffee. "Why aren't you having a martini like those guys?" asks the bartender. "Oh," says the atheist, "I don't believe in martinis before lunch."



Why does an atheist wear red suspenders?
To keep his pants from being taken up to heaven during the rapture.



A Jew, A Catholic, and an atheist are rowing in Lake Erie when their boat springs a huge leak. The Jew looks skyward, and says "Oh, Adonai, if you save me, I promise I'll sail to Israel and spend the rest of my days trying to reclaim the land you gave us." The Catholic looks skyward, and says, "Oh, Jesus, if you save me, I promise I'll fly to the Vatican and spend the rest of my days singing your praises." The atheist says, "Oh, guys, if you pass me that one life preserver, I promise I'll swim to Cleveland." "And how will you spend the rest of your days?" the Jew and the Catholic ask. "Well," says the atheist, "I'm not sure, but I can tell you one thing: I'll never go rowing with other atheists."



How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to actually change the bulb, and the other to videotape the job so fundamentalists won't claim that god did it.



An atheist goes to a Christian psychiatrist, who hands her an inkblot and says, "Tell me what you see." The atheist says, "I see Jesus on the cross." The psychiatrist hands her a second inkblot, and says, "Now tell me what you see." The atheist says, "I still see Jesus on the cross." The psychiatrist hands her a third inkblot, and says, "What do you see now?" The atheist says, "It's Jesus on the cross again." The psychiatrist says, "Hmmm. Obviously you've got Jesus on the brain." The atheist replies, "Me? I only read the captions you wrote."



Atheist: What's this fly doing in my soup?
Waiter: Praying.
Atheist: Very funny. I can't eat this. Take it back.
Waiter: You see? The fly's prayers were answered.



How can you tell if an atheist lives in your refrigerator?
You find a copy of The God Delusion hidden in the cream cheese.



An atheist buys an ancient lamp at an auction, takes it home, and begins to polish it. Suddenly, a genie appears, and says, "I'll grant you three wishes, Master." The atheist says, "I wish I could believe in you." The genie snaps his fingers, and suddenly the atheist believes in him. The atheist says, "Wow. I wish all atheists would believe this." The genie snaps his fingers again, and suddenly atheists all over the world begin to believe in genies. "What about your third wish?" asks the genie. "Well," says the atheist, "I wish for a billion dollars." The genie snaps his fingers for a third time, but nothing happens. "What's wrong?" asks the atheist. The genie shrugs and says, "Just because you believe in me, doesn't necessarily mean that I really exist."



Two cannibals are eating an atheist, and one says to the other, "Can you believe the way this guy tastes?"



Knock, knock.
Who's there?
God.
Who?
God.
Who?
God.
Must be the wind.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 05:43 AM

Free speech? Closing a thread interferes with free speech?

I gives me great pleasure that even in the event that this thread is closed, you will be able to post to others and even start your own. Most likely no one will call you a git for doing so.

"I'm an atheist, but I don't go around attacking those who believe in any religion."

In that case I find it unlikely that this thread was aimed at you.

I don't get the jokes either. But I don't think that good people call sane people delusional.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Joe Offer
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 05:15 AM

Yeah, I gotta say I don't get the point of the thread.
I'm not the one who closes such things any more, but I don't think I would have closed it Back In The Day. Still there's an element of meanness to the "jokes" that makes them Not Funny.

Hey, some of the people I respect most, are atheists. Be nice to them.
And no, I don't hope that some day they'll convert. One trait of most atheists I've known, is honesty. I appreciate that.

-Joe-

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 04:33 AM

The only 'point' that I can identify OD to have made is that he is more of a smartarse than previously suspected.

~M~

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 04:25 AM

Olddude obviously doesn't believe in free speech, he want's a thread closing because he thinks he has made his point, git.

I'm an atheist, but I don't go around attacking those who believe in any religion.

Dave H

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Jim Carroll
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 04:19 AM

The is an ongoing arrogance in all these arguments that those who don't agree with your beliefs have none of their own, which sums up most religious fundamentalism as I understand it.
Jim Carroll

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: GUEST,Spleen Cringe
Date: 03 Apr 13 - 04:05 AM

Weird thread. I don't believe in god, but have no compulsion to attack anyone who does (or even have a conversation about it for that matter).

And those aren't jokes. Jokes are supposed to be funny.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 09:49 PM

why do atheists feel the need to constantly attack others beliefs.
Answer: it is the only way they can get anyone to talk to them


Joe
you can close the thread now ... maybe I made my point

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 09:42 PM

Where do atheists go when they die
No where, God don't want them and the devil as more than enough

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 09:36 PM

What do you say to an atheist wearing a corset?


Hi Steve!

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 09:26 PM

sorry - Not

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 09:19 PM

Jaysus, this is the most corset-splitting thread I've seen in years. Not.

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 08:53 PM

Who do atheists call out to when they are having sex?

"OH! Not God!!

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Bill D
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 08:30 PM

I fail to see either the point of the thread or the weak metaphors used as examples of whatever the point is. Does my failure to get the 'humor' imply I am an atheist? ;>)

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: GUEST,olddude
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 07:18 PM

Why do Atheists have NO sense of humor ? Cause they believe the one scientist that said it cut off Oxygen to the brain

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: bobad
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 06:26 PM

"There is no polite way to suggest to someone that they have devoted their life to a folly"

    Daniel Dennett

Subject: RE: BS: Atheists
From: Jeri
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 06:23 PM

Bullshit?

Subject: BS: Atheists
From: olddude
Date: 02 Apr 13 - 06:01 PM

How many Atheists does it take to change a light bulb ? None
they don't believe it can be done

Why don't Atheists carry umbrellas ? They don't believe the weather man

Why do Atheists never use elevators ? They don't trust or believe the elevator floor lights

Why are Atheists always sick ? They don't believe their doctor

and ?