Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody

Subject: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: GUEST,SIMON
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 08:59 AM

lat night at a singing session I heard the "Californian" version of Pleasant and Delightful ( "the larks they sang melodious"), the one with such choruses as:

AND THE BIRDS GOT INTO MUSIC (x3) Man all they did was sing

It was hilarious. Anyone got the full lyrix ?

Thanx

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Bonnie Shaljean
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 09:58 AM

I don't have the words you're looking for, but we used to sing "the larks they played melodeons..."

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Morticia
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 10:50 AM

It's called Cosmic and Freaky and it's here in the DT: blickie

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 01:25 PM

And it's sharks that played melodeons at the bottom of the bay....

LTS

Subject: Lyr Add: THE BAR IT SMELLED MALODOROUS (parody)
From: Dead Horse
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 01:39 PM

One more for the collection, wot I wrote some years gone.

THE BAR IT SMELLED MALODOROUS

As I went a-walking one evening last week
I popped into my local, a pint for to seek
But the pub had been taken over, by a brewery far away
And they'd changed the old Evening Star - to The Dawning Of The Day
And they'd changed the old Evening Star
And they'd changed the old Evening Star
And they'd changed the old Evening Star - to The Dawning Of The Day

I ploughed through the new carpet to the stainless steel bar
I stood by the potted palm as I ordered a jar
Now the barmaid she was topless, and so was the beer
And the price it had gone up me boys, it was now twice as dear

The jukebox and the pinball were one side of the room
And the one arm-ed bandit, it played a merry tune
While the brass plated plastic fire was switched off at the main
And the bar stool I was sitting on, it was simulated cane

The back room was a restaurant serving Indian and Bolognese
While the curry and the Parmesan, set up a permanent haze
With extractors in the kitchen tried to take the smell away
But the bar it smelled malodorous at The Dawning Of The Day

Over in the corner where the dartboard had been
Was a bright pink, self-selection, three flavour condom machine
And where once the hand pumps had stood, now only lager was strewn
And if never I return again, it will be too bloody soon!
And if never I return again. And if never I return again
And if never I return again, it will be too bloody soon!

Serves you right for askin' !!!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 01:42 PM

Grit Laskin. But I thought it was Cosmic and Groovy. Still, the memory can wobble after 20 years. I heard it from Black Joker Morris (Cambridge, Mass?) when they were over on tour England in 1982. Groovy might have been the Anglicised form.

Kitty

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 01:47 PM

Dead Horse

Any connection with

"There's a stain on the floor of the bar-room
There's a case in a cap by the door
There's a name on a stone in the churchyard
In memory of one who's no more"?

Kitty

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 01:53 PM

Sorry, cap in case.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Micca
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 02:14 PM

while your at it , has anyone got the complete words of "the sharks they played Melodeons??? Herga Kitty? Morty,? Anyone?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Jacob B
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 04:46 PM

Herga Kitty,

Which one of us Black Jokers did you learn it from? I don't think I ever bothered getting all of the words to that song, so I don't think it was me.

That was a fun tour. The Brits were wearing tricornered hats, while the Yanks were wearing bowlers. We danced in front of Westminster Abbey, and the police didn't allow us to bag because the Queen was inside. She finally came out and drove past us, waving from her car as I was doing split capers, so I can now honestly say that I've danced before the Queen. (I can also honestly say that I stopped by Althorp for tea and a chat with the Earl of Spencer, but that's another deliberately misleading story.)

The song that we collected while in England was a parody of Lord Of The Dance about Morris dancing. ("Dance, dance, when I give the word, never mind the people who say we look absurd ...") Are you familiar with that one?

Jacob

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 05:32 PM

Jacob

This really takes me back. The dancers in tricorn hats were Herga Morris. Back in the 1970s and 80s the London Morris sides took it in turns to dance outside Westminster Abbey on Wednesday evenings in the summer, and I remember being there in 1982 when Black Joker were also dancing (there might have been a a pre- and/ or after session in the Buckingham Arms pub too, because there usually was).

One of the Herga Morrismen (Derek Harrison,who was running Dragon Records with John Heydon) was married on 3 July 1982, and the wedding ceilidh was held in Haddenham Village Hall, Buckinghamshire. Black Joker were there and danced, and someone from the side sang Cosmic and Groovy (or Freaky). And Bob Walser was there, singing and playing - my recollection is that he was resident at the Mystic Seaport and away from Minnesota at the time - and that was the first time I met him.

And I learnt all the words of the cosmic parody and have now completely forgotten them. Which is a shame, as I'm involved in running a parody workshop session at Upton on Severn festival next month. Of course Grit Laskin was responsible for Angus Hemsted as well.

Kitty

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 05:47 PM

Sorry Jacob, I forgot to pick up on the Lord of the Dance parody. I have a niggling (well, more like nauseating) recollection that this was down to Robot Nimbb - allegedly a shepherd discovered by Herga Morris in the Black Horse at Chippenham folk festival in 1975, but in reality an anagram of Ron (Barnett, then bagman of Herga Morris), Bob (Hawkes) - later organiser of Saffron Walden Folk Festival - and Tim (Edwards - squire of Herga Morris when they appeared on the Generation Game with Larry Grayson and Isla StClair). Robot Nimbb were responsible for "Wrap me up in me bells and me baldricks" which is now in the DT ( the parody of John Connolly's ....)

Kitty

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Hawker
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 07:13 PM

Any chance of the lord of the dance parody then? love a copy of that one!
Cheers
Lucy

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: GUEST,SIMON
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 08:27 PM

tA VERY MUCH mORTICIA for CCosmic and Freaky.

Thanx also to Dead Horse for yr version

Subject: Lyr Add: LORD OF THE DANCE (PARODY)
From: Jacob B
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 12:06 PM

Dead Horse, thanks for The Bar It Smelled Malodorous. It's delightful.

Here's the LORD OF THE DANCE (PARODY):


I joined the Morris at an advanced age
I wondered why the squire was always in a rage
These are the words that to me he said
He emphasized them with his stick on top of me head

(chorus)
Dance, dance, when I give the word
Never mind the people who say we look absurd
Take your place and stand in line
Don't move a muscle till I say, "This time!"

We danced at the Crown at half past eight
The Fool was emasculated trying to jump the gate
The squire said, "Boys, I think we're out of luck"
Then his baldrick got caught up on a passing Watney's truck

From hand to hand the box went round
Till some clumsy bugger dropped it on the ground
The bagman said, "Boys, I think it's broken"
But all that was in it was a fruit machine token

It was late when at the Bull we did appear
It's hard to dance with a belly full of beer
"Follow me" said the foreman, "I'll show you the way"
Did we ever make a cock-up of that Adderbury Hey

By the end of the night we were on our knees
But we'd danced for the people, and we'd done our best to please
Our legs were aching and our feet were sore
I'm never going out with the Morris any more


Watney is a popular brand of beer in some parts of England. A fruit machine is the same as the one-armed bandit mentioned in "The Bar It Smelled Malodorous". It's a machine with a lever on one side that causes pictures of fruits to show up in a window at the top of the machine. If all of the pictures are of the same fruit, you win money - unless your winnings are over a pound. In that case, you get your winnings in tokens which are only good for playing the fruit machine again.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Dead Horse
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 01:57 PM

Or for putting in the morris bag!
And who said Watneys was popular? It's the beer that usually gets mentioned in parodies when you wish to express disgust! As in Watneys Red Barrel.
Saying, May I go along with you?
Saying, May I go along with you?
Saying, May I go along with you?
Oh, yes you can, like hell.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 03:11 PM

As far as I know, Watneys (formerly Watney Mann) no longer exists. (Does anyone brew in Putney?)

Watneys features in "Untippled" (Heaven is where Watneys Red Barrel is banned and the fool never buggers a dance that is planned), and also in the version I learned by osmosis at Herga of Glorious Ale - "Some folks is teetotal, they drink Watneys neat".

Watneys were also responsible for the large "Party 7s" cans that got recycled from party to party in the 1970s because no-one wanted to open and drink them.

Dear me, what a nostalgic thread.

Kitty

PS I learned the original, traditional, Pleasant and Delightful at my first Sidmouth festival when I was 17 and Tony Rose was teaching it to people to sing in the last night procession.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Bill D
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 11:42 PM

also...this one is in the DT, too....

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Hawker
Date: 04 Apr 02 - 10:33 AM

Thanx for the Lord of The Dance parody Jacob, Muchly appreciated!
Cheers, Lucy

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 04 Apr 02 - 11:01 AM

As Micca has been to stay for a week with jez and I, I now have the tune squirrelling around in my tiny little head...........thanx Micca!!!!

cat

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 04 Apr 02 - 12:48 PM

Dave Diamond also did one: "Twas Efficient and Cost-effective". In DigiTrad

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 04 Apr 02 - 01:59 PM

The Lord of the Dance parody wasn't a Robott Nimb (silly me, should have spotted that the bs and ts didn't correspond) - Bob Hawkes suggested, and I have since confirmed (by looking at the book wot I own,) that it was written by the late Dave Houlden. It's on page 32 of "I never meant to be taken literally" - the collection of Dave's songs and parodies put together by Malcolm Austen after Dave died. On page 8 is the "Boney goes boozing" parody of "My name's Napoleon Bonaparte", for which Dave was also responsible, and the words of which I have posted on a previous thread.

Kitty

PS Watneys didn't brew at Putney but at Mortlake. I've always assumed that the University Boat Race was a desperate attempt to find some Fullers (brewed in Chiswick). Although the experts on this are probably Hammersmith Morris.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: YorkshireYankee
Date: 28 Nov 03 - 06:46 AM

Some folks I know (Dale Petty & Janet Goldwasser, to give credit where credit is due) made up an additional verse (which I quite like) to "update" C&F:

Thus she was once male identified, but now she can cope
She's into women's music, self-defense and out of dope
She has friends; long-term relationships, all based on equality
'Cause after all sisters, it's two thousand ____ (fill in the blank),
          Not 1963
After all sisters, it's two thousand ____
After all sisters, it's two thousand ____, not 1693

(Note: the last lines worked particularly well in the last couple of decades of the 20th century; the new millennium dates are not quite as singable, but so it goes...)

Cheers,

YY

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Schantieman
Date: 28 Nov 03 - 07:07 AM

The last lines of the verses, repeated as the choruses, can go like this:

1. And the sharks, they played melodeons at the bottom of the bay
      (as normal)

2. I must go and leave you Nancy
    Someone else has took my fancy
    I must go and leave you Nancy
    For the girl that I adore

3. Saying, "May I go along with you?
    No-one else is half as long as you!"
    Saying, "May I go along with you?"
    "Oh, no, my love - like Hell!"

4. And if ever I return again, I will take you for a ride.

:-)

Steve

Subject: Lyr Add: BORED OF THE DANCE
From: fantum
Date: 30 Nov 03 - 07:55 PM

Hawker this is another Lord of the dance parody taken from the digitrad
The tune is slightly different

BORED OF THE DANCE
(Nudds & Sugden)

As I walked down to the village hall
I met Charlie leanin' on the wall
"Why are you standin' out here, Char-lee?"
"Cause I am bored of the dance!" said he!

Chorus:
Dance! Dance! Whatever do they see?
In prancin' round all the time, said he
I'll leave them all to do it without me
For I am bored of the dance, said he!

I come to the dance with my girl, he said
I told her that I'd rather go to bed,
Oh yes I'm sure you would, said she,
But first you'll come and dance with me!

She said, You'll come and dance right now!
But I weren't list'nin' when the caller told us how
They "cast left," but "right" I went
They danced on, but I ended in the "Gents'!"

I drank with the Morris-men, James and John,
They drank with me as the dance went on and on,
We drank and we drank till it all went black.
It's hard to dance when you're lyin' on your back!

Oh, how she danced on the night they were wed
She danced, he drank, and then they went to bed
I'm afraid there's no more story to be told
She was too hot, and he was out cold!

From The Kipper Family, Fresh Yesterday

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Leadfingers
Date: 30 Nov 03 - 09:48 PM

In the mid sixties I recall singing The Sharks with some Very Good singers in the Tithe Barne Ruislip,one of the Middlesex Festivals the OLD Uxbridge Club ran. The last lines were :-

And The sharks They Played Melodeons at the Bottom of the bay

I Must Go And Leave You Nancy, Tou're A Filthy Old Whore

Saying May I Go Along With You - Oh No My Love Like Hell

And If Ever I Return Again I'll Be Out of My Mind


I will Not publish the names of those involved - Some of them are still getting well paid and are ? Respected ? singers.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Pleasant & Delightful' parody
From: Lady Hillary
Date: 01 Dec 03 - 09:44 AM

And the Sharks, they stank malodorous, at the bottom of the bay...

And I'm goin' to leave my Nancy, she's a two dollar whore...

And if ever I return again, should I see you, I'll hide.

I've been using these variant lines since the 70's.

EBarnacle on Lady Hillary's machine