OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: ClaireBear
Date: 01 May 12 - 03:25 PM

As am I, dear friend. Virtual hugs.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: KT
Date: 01 May 12 - 02:50 PM

Thinking of you, Micca....

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 01 May 12 - 12:53 AM

Thinking kind thoughts for you both, Micca.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 30 Apr 12 - 08:54 PM

Oh, sad. Sending love in an attempt at consolation.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: gnu
Date: 30 Apr 12 - 01:11 PM

My sincerest condolences, yet again.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: SINSULL
Date: 30 Apr 12 - 12:52 PM

Some losses don't ease with time. Sorry, Micca and Morty.





But I'll call you at 2AM if it will help.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Mrrzy
Date: 30 Apr 12 - 12:20 PM

So sorry. I rememeber Fin's posts with great pleasure. Love to you both and to the rest of your kith and kin. We are all smallened.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Apr 12 - 10:56 AM

{{{{{{Micca & Fin}}}}}}

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Micca
Date: 30 Apr 12 - 07:44 AM

Its been 10 years since the phone stopped ringing at 2 am, (she could never get the time difference right) and its been so long! My dear siste, so long

I have no words
To spend here
Tonight
Is neutral
On my knee
The pad looks
Impassively
On
Just like the rest
Of the Universe
I reflect with O'Casey
"What is the Stars?"
The stars
Are
indifferent

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: ClaireBear
Date: 30 Apr 10 - 12:51 PM

{{{Micca}}}

{{{Morticia}}}

When a bear hugs you, you stay hugged.

Claire

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Morticia
Date: 30 Apr 10 - 12:21 PM

got through another year without you, can't say I like it much...

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Ebbie
Date: 30 Apr 10 - 10:51 AM

Ah, these memories. The approaching day brings with it such a treasure load. Thank the gods for memory.

{{{{hug}}}}

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Tinker
Date: 30 Apr 10 - 10:24 AM

There's a grounding root -- a planted core
That pulls you up, that calls to soar
The past circles round,but spirals ever on
Whispering remember, chanting go on....

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Apr 10 - 10:09 AM

{{{{Micca}}}}

{{{{Morticia}}}}

You know she's always keeping an eye on you, Micca.*gentle smile*

love,

katey

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: gnu
Date: 30 Apr 10 - 10:01 AM

I have no words.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Micca
Date: 30 Apr 10 - 07:47 AM

The wheel has turned again and she is still missed, and ever in my thoughts,
" where the mountains touch the sea
thats where you'll find me
Watching the moonlight
the flickering starlight
The golden sunset
the morning sunrise
In Lahaina luna"

Micca

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Donuel
Date: 01 May 09 - 10:17 AM

Thanks for Fin's posts, she is so compassionate and kind - forever.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Apr 09 - 03:22 PM

And she speaks across the way, once again...Hauoli La Hanau, Brother. Love you. Fin

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Noreen
Date: 30 Apr 09 - 03:10 PM

Fin's posts

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 30 Apr 09 - 03:01 PM

Thank you all. I still don't know how I do. I just do... go on. Does it get easier? I can't answer that yet. I feel less dysfunctional, more able to cope with memories and out of the blue reminders. But I don't know if it is easier.

The title of this thread is Mudcatter Fin. Did Fin post here on Mudcat? Might be nice to have a link to her posts on this thread so people can get to know her?

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Morticia
Date: 30 Apr 09 - 01:36 PM

She'd have bloody killed him for saying she was in her sixties though.........especially as she wasn't, she never did reach 60, her 60th birthday would have been 10 days after she died. My mother has always been convinced that she did that deliberately *G*.

I miss her every single day, glad she was in my life every single day too.

VT, huge hugs, I couldn't begin to think how to go on if I lost either of my kids.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Tinker
Date: 30 Apr 09 - 12:45 PM

Micca, you've brought Fin to life for me on several occasions, so that the memory of her here and now still brings not just a smile, but a bit of a "this could be trouble grin"

Hugs and gentle thoughts...

tink

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: catspaw49
Date: 30 Apr 09 - 12:18 PM

I can't say either any better to cousin Micca or VT........

Spaw

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Apr 09 - 11:47 AM

Dear Micca, so much a part of my life these past years and beyond. Much love and hugs to you, darlin' and to Fin for being who she was to you, esp.

VTam, I am grateful you have been sharing more with us about Andie and that it seems to be helping. You have lived through what every parent fears and your sorrow is great. May it hold true that sorrow shared is halved; joy shared doubled. From what you have said about her, I think Andie would like that you look for the joy and have found some on Mudcat.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Micca
Date: 30 Apr 09 - 11:39 AM

May I offer my condolences in your grief VT? at least my sis Fin was in her 60s and had led a full life with 2 kids and the chance to explore her spiritual being and knew it was her time to go, My Hugs to you, on this, now always slightly sombre day
Micca

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 30 Apr 09 - 08:33 AM

Hugs to you Micca

I lost my 23 year old daughter Andie on the 28th of April 2005.

This year's grief has been considerably eased by reading the good folk on Mudcat.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Micca
Date: 30 Apr 09 - 04:28 AM

It is that Time again

The moving finger writes and having writ
moves on and all your piety nor wit
can call it back to cancel half a line
nor all your tears wash out a word of it"

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Donuel
Date: 01 May 08 - 12:46 PM

I remember the name and now regret never having known your dear sister.
You have my condolences,
Don

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Ebbie
Date: 01 May 08 - 12:41 PM

"Life is filled with constant chanege and moving on
Where will we go when the music ends..." Buddy Tabor song

Micca, m'dear, a big hug for you. It's never easy, as has been said before.

Spaw, I love your story. When you read those lettes it's going to be a damp afternoon but I'll bet there will be a song in your heart.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Peter T.
Date: 01 May 08 - 11:09 AM

It turns into a different kind of pain, it doesn't get better. It is like the difference between toothache and chronic pain. You can live with it, but it is there, and it has changed you. A friend who paints says that it is like a canvas -- the original is white, but the additional layers on top of it influence all the subsequent layers. These kinds of deaths are like that. Perhaps it is why Rembrandt's paintings are the epitome of human experience -- lots of layers of loss -- but the glow on the top is often even more powerful because of that.

yours,

Peter T.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Micca
Date: 01 May 08 - 10:59 AM

my Deep appreciation and thanks to you all who have posted,
Sins, maybe at least part of why I am like I am is Because I had Fin as my sister!!!
Funny I was very strongly reminded of Fin Yesterday on the bus,I heard a broad Belfast accent. Fin was an absolute unconcious "accent mimic" so if she spent an evening with her friend Jeanette she came home speaking as if she had lived "on the Falls or the Shankill" all her life!! and was always surprised if my mother asked her "how is Jeanette?" she would reply in amazement, "How do you know I saw Jeanette?" Its the memories....

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: SINSULL
Date: 01 May 08 - 08:14 AM

Trying to imagine growing up with Micca as a brother...it must have been a bit of a roller coaster ride with a giant WAHOO at the end. Remember the good times, Micca.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: ranger1
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 08:05 PM

((((Micca and Mortie))))

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Alice
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 07:51 PM

Micca, I am very sorry to hear of your loss.
Take care, Alice

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Beer
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 05:54 PM

Deepest sympathies to you and your love ones.
Adrien

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: catspaw49
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 05:47 PM

Ya' know it just never does get much easier. No matter what the circumstance it is always tough at first but after awhile you almost get used to a gnawing kind of pain. Sadly, at least in my experience, it never leaves. No matter how many wonderful memories overflow my heart, that gnawing, slow, kind of pain is still there. I've come to think that perhaps it should be as it makes the memories even better.

The other day I was talking to my "Second Mom".........Her name is Margaret. Her husband Joe and my Dad were best friends from earliest childhood and as it often happens, they married at about the same time after the war. Neither of the girls knew the other at the time but Marg and my Mom (Margie) became close friends and the couples spent many good times together. Their son Mark was born just a few months before me and we grew up together, best friends for many years too until we moved to Columbus. Even then the families stayed very close and spent much time together. Margie and Marg often wrote long letters back and forth ........small town America at its best.

Margie died in '67 and my Dad in '73. Joe passed on in '87. Marg has had some health problems and just last week moved into a retirement community close to her daughter after 60 years in the same home. I called the other day just to wish her well in the new place and to let her know I'd be down soon to check it out. We laughed and talked for awhile and I knew it was so very hard for her to leave the house back home but it had just become too much. We talked of all the "stuff" that she had to get rid of as well as what she kept and what her girls (both great daughters) had taken. Towards the end of the hour long talk she dropped this bomb which she had never mentioned before:

"Pat, I have all the letters Margie wrote to me."

I was astonished and lump immediately came into my throat. You see, I have almost nothing of my parents or my childhood owing to a fire in a storage unit while I was in a job where I moved often back 25 years ago. Marg had shared some pictures and things with me but never before had she mentioned these letters. She continued:

"I thought you might like to have them and I think Karen would really enjoy them and give her some insight into your Mom."

Karen obviously never knew my Mom but Marg was nuts for her right away and I oft told Karen that knowing Marg is much like knowing Margie and if Marg liked her as she obviously did (and does), she'd have been a big hit with my Mom too. I was so pleased that Marg had kept these letters for so many years that I was almost without words to express my thanks. Then she said what made me think of this and why I bothered to post it today.

"I like to take them out and read them sometimes when I get sad. They make me remember how much fun Margie was and all the good times we had together back then."

It took a few minutes but I finally quit blubbering. I guess the pain is never completely gone for those we love but it gets better and can make the memories even finer.

Micca........Terri.........Best to you both.

Pat

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: sapper82
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 02:25 PM

Micca and Morticia, My sympathy on this aniversary. I hope that the edges of that Fin shaped hole in your lives have by now atarted to heal and that they do not hurt quite so much when you touch them.

Bob

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Mooh
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 02:07 PM

Very sorry to hear this. Our sympathies, prayers, and thoughts to you and yours.

Peace, Mooh.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Bonnie Shaljean
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 01:48 PM

Thinking of you still -

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Hawker
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 01:28 PM

So sorry to hear this Micca, Much love to you and yours and a big mudcat hug to go with it from sunny Cornwall.
:0( Lucy

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: My guru always said
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 01:22 PM

Thinking of you with candle lit & raising a glass,
Hil xx

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: katlaughing
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 01:21 PM

{{{{{{Micca & Mortee}}}}}}

luvyadarlin's


katty

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: freda underhill
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 01:17 PM

a big hug for you and morticia, micca

freda

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Micca
Date: 30 Apr 08 - 01:01 PM

Its the 6th anniversary, I will light a candle..

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: katlaughing
Date: 06 May 07 - 04:25 PM

Beautiful, Miccadarlin'...would love all of your poems in a book.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Micca
Date: 06 May 07 - 03:55 PM

5 years on and things still changing
3 more deaths as well to mourn
With the cycles slowly rolling
Marriage, death, and being born
Maybe change will soon be coming
gain an enemy, Lose a friend
As we learn to cut our losses
Bringing some things to an end
when bad things have ceased to happen
And we move forward at last
from the silence of lost voices
And the echoes of the past
Life is change, and ever changing
Merry meet and merry part
Those removed still live inside us
In that place within the heart

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin - 30 April 2002
From: Morticia
Date: 06 May 07 - 05:05 AM

She's been much in my mind this week, she never leaves my heart.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin
From: ranger1
Date: 05 May 07 - 08:23 PM

Hugs, Micca.

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin
From: catspaw49
Date: 05 May 07 - 06:54 PM

Time makes no difference when the pain doesn't care.

Spaw

Subject: RE: OBIT: Mudcatter Fin
From: katlaughing
Date: 05 May 07 - 06:51 PM

Mortee, I meant that hug for you, too!

luvyakat