BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash

Subject: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: Donuel
Date: 31 Mar 04 - 06:58 PM

The Onion lost 4 staff members and writers in a small plane crash in Ypsilante Michigan today. The NATB announced even before its investigation that it was probably pilot error and drug abuse based upon tower communications.

Now they are down to just 4 people.

As a former employee of the Onion I will miss them with mixed feelings.

After I was fired from the Onion for sexually harrassing
myself I was hired by the New Bush Times to balance the
extremist voice of the Onion.

Here are some rare out takes during my transition period that
NO ONE has ever seen before.

http://www.angelfire.com/md2/customviolins/onion4a.jpg

http://www.angelfire.com/md2/customviolins/onion.jpg

http://www.angelfire.com/md2/customviolins/onion1.jpg


http://www.angelfire.com/md2/customviolins/onion2.jpg


http://www.angelfire.com/md2/customviolins/onion3.jpg

Subject: RE: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: GUEST,Jim McCallan
Date: 31 Mar 04 - 07:28 PM

Nice one, Donuel...

What is the writing on the document Colin Powell has in front of him in the picture 'onion.jpg' - Do Not....?

Jim :-)

Subject: RE: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: Donuel
Date: 01 Apr 04 - 12:02 AM

After being accused of an April fool joke I thought I would make one.

I don't recall Jim but in one version I did write on W's index card "It was dad's idea"

Subject: RE: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: GUEST,Fred Miller
Date: 01 Apr 04 - 12:12 AM

But seriously, did you write for the Onion?

Subject: RE: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: GUEST,Billy
Date: 01 Apr 04 - 01:48 AM

Donuel, I saw this report on the wire and it said that they were travelling in a Cessna which ploughed into a cemetary. Michigan authorities were reporting thousands of dead at the scene.

Subject: RE: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: Charley Noble
Date: 01 Apr 04 - 09:17 AM

You can't peal an onion without breaking its shell?

No use crying over pealed onions?

What a tragedy! Words are so inadequate.

Charley Noble, in despair

Subject: RE: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: Donuel
Date: 01 Apr 04 - 09:17 AM

I never worked for the Onion but I bet it would be a hoot.

it is true the entire staff has only about 8 people.

Regarding the crash: Republicans are already gearing up to protest the memorial service as being in bad taste.

Subject: RE: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: GUEST,Jim McCallan
Date: 01 Apr 04 - 10:31 AM

... For whom the Onion peals....

Subject: RE: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: Bill D
Date: 01 Apr 04 - 12:25 PM

I assume all flags will be flying at half-staff?

Subject: RE: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: open mike
Date: 02 Apr 04 - 05:30 AM

IS THIS AN APIRL FOOLS JOKE? I LOOKED INT EH NEWS AND COULD NOT FIND MENTION...BY THE WAY Ypsilante IS SPELLED Ypsilanti

Subject: RE: BS: 1/2 of Onion staff killed in plane crash
From: GUEST,fred miller
Date: 02 Apr 04 - 08:20 PM

darn, i was going to try to identify bits you wrote by your writing style. that would be fun too.