BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality

Subject: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: GUEST
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 07:53 AM

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: GUEST
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 07:54 AM

WOMEN'S ADS

40-ish.................... 49
Adventurer.................Slept with all your friends
Average looking...............Has a face like a basset hound
Beautiful................... Pathological liar
Contagious Smile.............Does a lot of Ecstasy
Emotionally Secure..........Medicated
Feminist....................Fat ballbuster
Free spirit.................Junkie
Friendship first............Trying to live down reputation as a ****
Fun..........................Annoying
Gentle......................Comatose
Good Listener..............Borderline Autistic
New-Age.....................All body hair, all the time
Open-minded...............Desperate
Outgoing..................Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate................Sloppy drunk
Poet......................Depressive Schizophrenic
Professional..............Certified Bitch
Redhead...................Bad dye-job
Reubenesque...............Grossly Fat
Romantic.....................Looks better by candle light
Social.....................Has been passed around like an hors d'oeuvres tray
Voluptuous..................Very Fat Weight proportion w/height.
Fat..........................As tall as you are wide
Wants Soulmate...............Stalker
Young at heart.............Old bat


MEN'S ADS

40-ish.................... 52 and looking for 25-yr-old
Athletic.................... Watches a lot of NASCAR
Average looking........... Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back
Educated.................. Will patronize the hell out of you
Free Spirit................ Will sleep with your sister
Friendship first............ As long as friendship involves nookie
Fun.......................Good with a remote and a six pack
Good looking.............. Arrogant
Very good looking........... Dumb as a board
Honest...................... Pathological Liar
Huggable..................... Overweight, more body hair than a bear
Likes to cuddle............ Insecure mama's boy
Mature..................... Older than your father
Physically fit............ Does a lot of 12-ounce curls
Poet......................Wrote ex-girlfriend's # on a bathroom stall
Sensitive................. Cries at chick flicks
Very sensitive.............. Gay
Spiritual.................. Got laid in a cemetery once
Stable...................... Arrested for stalking, but not convicted
Thoughtful.................. Says "Excuse me" when he farts

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Crystal
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 08:28 AM

What about GSOH required?
I'm guessing it means you REALLY need a sense of humor when you meet the guy!

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 08:36 AM

Placing a lonley hearts ad- Terrified to meet people any other way?

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Splott Man
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 11:03 AM

Man with GSOH looking for woman with TIN for good Scrabble score.

One legged tennis player looking for similar for Mixed Singles competition.

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: kendall
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 12:15 PM

Those lists are a riot!

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: SINSULL
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 01:22 PM

Especially the men's!

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Leadfingers
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 02:32 PM

I resemble that list !!

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: open mike
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 03:14 PM

the heart is a lonely hunter

ooh the dreaded valentines day is coming up..

all plush hearts, red decorations, teddy bears,

special couples dinners, dances, dates...

all guaranteed to make the lonely hearts even more so

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: SINSULL
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 09:01 PM

Look at the bright side OM. The day after Valentine's Day, all that chocolate goes on sale half price.

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Azizi
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 10:15 PM

Good job, Guest!

I thought BOTH of those list were witty [and maybe too often true for laughs.]

But I'm going to show my ignorance about Lonly Hearts ads:

What do GSOH and TIN mean?

Ms. Azizi

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: GUEST,Layah
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 10:20 PM

I had just that question myself, so I looked it up. GSOH is good sense of humor. TIN I couldn't find anywhere.

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Azizi
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 10:32 PM

Thanks, Guest Layah for posting that meaning..

Since GSOH could relate to a male or a female, maybe TIN also relates to either gender.

Besides the ones used for gender, race, and sexual orientation.. I wonder what other Lonely Hearts Ad acronyms we could come up with for males only or females only or for both?

Here's a few I just made up:

GHA -good housekeeper

GIB-good in bed

GFP- good financial planner


Maybe Guest Who Posted The First list or someone else can add some witty sayings about what they really mean.

just for fun,

Ms. Azizi

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Azizi
Date: 01 Feb 05 - 10:36 PM

Scratch that first acroynm: and substitute GH
[what WAS I thinking of??? Good housekeeper {and} Ass???]

I'll never tell..

;o))

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Splott Man
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 03:44 AM

GSOH - Good Sense Of Humour

TIN - I made it up to create a joke - :-)    If I have to explain it....

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Splott Man
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 03:44 AM

Although TIN is slang for money, giving an extra dimension to the joke... I thought....

Oh well...

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Teresa
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 03:58 AM

In other words, don't go out with anyone. :>

When they talk about "no baggage", are they referring to body size or emotional stuff? :>

I have plans at *friends' house for "anti-Valentine's Day" pizza party. :)

Teresa

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Crystal
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 05:04 AM

Valentines day is on a Monday this year. This means sloppy romantic gestures will, hopefully, be thin on the ground.
However I wouldn't say no to a romantic, suprise weekend in Paris, but, being realistic its not going to happen.

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Splott Man
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 05:12 AM

NB - It's SAINT Valentine's Day

And you don't wish people Happy Valentines as heard and seen on the mass media, you pick one special person and say "Be my Valentine".

Well, that's the custom as I know it


Thank you


I feel better now


I'll go and lie down

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: GUEST,Layah
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 09:00 PM

I can't ever manage to have a boyfriend over Valentine's day. Well, I did once but we were in different states that weekend. Other than that my boyfriends break up with me in January. January is obviously a bad time Maybe January makes me ugly? Must be all that eating over the holidays =)

And actual meanings for made up acronyms:

Good housekeeper: obsessive compulsive neat freak

Good in bed (for a man): After sex stays awake long enough to say something nice.

Good financial planner: tightfisted (don't expect many presents)

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Azizi
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 10:19 PM

Guest Layah,

Thanks for the posting..

I've seen some other post of yours lately..

Though you don't need any invitation from a member of Mudcat to join our worldwide community, I would like to urge you to do so.

Come on in! The water's fine!

Ms. Azizi

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: GUEST,Layah
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 10:24 PM

Thanks for the invite. But then that would be admiting that I intend to continue to spend time here. What a waste of time this is! Well, I suppose it looks like I've been hooked now anyway, I might as well join.

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: SINSULL
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 10:44 PM

Poor Saint Valentine got shot through with arrows - none from Cupid's Quiver. Nasty business.

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Azizi
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 11:10 PM

Guest Layah..

In reference to Mudcat discussion forum, you said:
"What a waste of time this is!"

Oh, no! Never say it's so!!

SInce I've joined Mudcat, I've learned a lot about music and other topics. I've also relaxed, enjoyed myself, sharpened my writing and computer skills, and met many interesting people from around the world-all in the privacy of my own home!

It's all that-and a bag of chips!! [if you can dig it...}

---

Sinsull...

Did you really mean your 'nasty business' comment?

Sometimes I can't tell 'serious' from 'sarcasm' on the Internet...

I think this thread is PC not *nasty* ..

and even people who know Cupid intimately can post here...you don't have to have a lonely heart.. I don't...

Ms. Azizi

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Layah
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 11:15 PM

Azizi,
I was not being serious about waste of time. It is of course the same kind of waste of time as any socializing type activity. It doesn't get my homework done, it doesn't make me well rested in the morning, but since when does that ever stop me from doing something? It is necessary to life. Well, not necessarily mudcat itself necessary to life, but activity other than those specifically required of me. For my 'lonely heart.' Or possibly my lack of spatulas.

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Teresa
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 11:23 PM

Hahahaha, welcom to the 'cat craziness, then, Layah. :)

Teresa

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: GUEST
Date: 02 Feb 05 - 11:27 PM

Especially the men's!

So sad.

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Azizi
Date: 03 Feb 05 - 12:26 AM

Welcome Layah!

And there's room for plenty more!

like Guest 02 Feb 05 - 11:27 PM who said

"Especially the men's!

So sad."

..Sorry, "Especially the men's what?" I don't understand..

[Sometimes I don't get the punch lines of jokes I hear either..}


Miss Azizi

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Teresa
Date: 03 Feb 05 - 12:30 AM

My guess would be the men's area of that quote in the first post? Or that is how I read it.

Teresa

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: GUEST,blushing catter
Date: 03 Feb 05 - 03:33 AM

friend of mine did this when overseas..... I had to translate them for her as she was clueless but maybe its a culture thing?

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Teresa
Date: 03 Feb 05 - 04:00 AM

I tried one of those online dating services that finds local people for you. I just didn't like it, because there was no cultural context to speak of. I prefer to find an activity I like doing and meet people that way. I can definitely make friends, and finding a sweetheart would be nice if it happened, too, though not necessary. :)

Teresa

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Azizi
Date: 03 Feb 05 - 04:20 AM

GUEST,blushing catter -

Thank your friend for us for writing this and thank you for your translation!

And, blushing catter, ditto for what I wrote to Guest Layah..

She took the plunge, so why not you??

Come on, join Mudcat!

[where you can blush about one thing or another and no one but {whomever} needs to know!]

;o))

MS. Azixi

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: GUEST,raggytash
Date: 03 Feb 05 - 05:43 AM

Hey Splott Man, do they not have scrabble or do anagrams in America, anyway you really need an X or a J for a good score

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 03 Feb 05 - 09:37 AM

Well dear, I would spring the romantic weekend in Paris surprise on you, so long as you don't don't mind me being in Newcastle at the time. And what are the odds on you being able to find your passport at short notice?

And some definitions.

Women.

Cooks well I want a house , ring and three kids right now.

Likes dancing. So you better too, or at least learn fast. And no, no matter how much we change partners on the floor, she's not coming to bed with us. And I want decent tickets to the ballet.

Men.

cooks well Has just split up with boyfreind.

likes dancing You know that stip club down the road...

Bunnahabhain.

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: Crystal
Date: 03 Feb 05 - 09:39 AM

I know exactly where my passport is...
Sort of...
I know which country it's in!
And which county!
And I can probably narrow it down to which house too!

Subject: RE: BS: Lonely Hearts Ads - the reality
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Feb 05 - 10:41 AM

Women
Own Car - Knows the Highway code too. OK?
SITCOM Small Income Two Kids Outrageous Mortgage
Strong personality control freak
Let You Know - Eventually
Walk you to the Car This is an income measuring device. It doesn't work when Red

Men
Own Car be nervous, be very nervous
Comfortable Income suufficient for one man's need
Strong Silent Type until I meet a control freak
Let you know Yea, sure. For what?
Walk you to the car Insecurity about size.