20 Naked Pentacostals

Subject: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Bob Schwarer
Date: 30 Nov 98 - 08:00 AM

Will someone please post the words to "20 Naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac"? I know the chorus pretty well, but not the verses.

Bob S.

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Bill D
Date: 30 Nov 98 - 12:34 PM

I sure hope someone does...this caught my eye like the thread of 1½ years ago called "Octopus & Flagellation"

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Roger in Baltimore
Date: 30 Nov 98 - 05:50 PM

Bill D.

I'm beginning to suspect that your poor taste in humorous songs is exceeded only by my own.

Roger in Baltimore

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Art Thieme
Date: 30 Nov 98 - 06:06 PM

...and a partridge in a pear tree!!

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: alison
Date: 30 Nov 98 - 06:52 PM

Hi,

and I'm still looking for the words of "Octopus and Flagellation"..... and still claiming that it's for a friend. It was the replies I got that started me visiting here regularly.

slainte

alison

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Pete M
Date: 30 Nov 98 - 07:28 PM

sounds pretty 'armless to me, but I could whip up an interest.

Pete M

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Barbara
Date: 30 Nov 98 - 07:59 PM

just dont let it octapi too much of your attention or you could take a beating,
and Bob, don't titillate us any longer, Puleeeze post the chorus so we can see (cough) what we're missing.
blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Big Mick
Date: 30 Nov 98 - 08:07 PM

I am fairly breathless with anticipation of this one.

Mick

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: BSeed
Date: 30 Nov 98 - 11:13 PM

somebody's gotta take this thing in hand... and post the lyrics. --seed

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: BSeed
Date: 30 Nov 98 - 11:14 PM

what I meant to say was "get a grip, guys!" --seed

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: The Shambles
Date: 01 Dec 98 - 05:40 AM

When we see all 20 of them, will we know where to grip?

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Ritchie
Date: 01 Dec 98 - 06:27 AM

Ha...'won't get fooled again'

I definitely thought the lyrics were here with all the recent activity on the thread.

Oh you are a tease...young man, young man.

love & happiness

Ritchie

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Bob Schwarer
Date: 01 Dec 98 - 08:16 AM

From memory. I'l hunt for it in a bit. Maybe I can find it. Most stuff is filed under "MISC".

(something)
Brothers and sisters in the back
Elders in the front
Choir in the trunk
20 naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac

There is also something about turning the other cheek.

Bob S.

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: none of the above
Date: 01 Dec 98 - 12:23 PM

is 'Octopus and Flagellation' otherwise known as Billy the Squid?

sorry, I don't know the song in question, it sounds a bit like the one about the 5 constipated men in the bible, starting "Oh the first, first constipated man Was Moses, He took the tablet"

Should we have a "world's worst song" competition/compilation thread?

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Bob Schwarer
Date: 01 Dec 98 - 12:26 PM

First tape I pulled was it. Notes say the song is done by The group Cornerstone (from upstate NY?).

Chorus:

20 naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac
Brothers & sisters jivin' in the back
Elders in the front
Choir in the trunk
20 naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac

The rest is there, but I can't decipher it. I was hoping someone knew it.

Bob S.

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: alison
Date: 01 Dec 98 - 05:44 PM

hi,

No the "Octopus" one... if I remember rightly was a line from a song called "Algenon Pide"(?????).

This all reminds me of the old pentecostal joke.

Hands down for coffee!

Slainte

alison

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Lyndan
Date: 02 Dec 98 - 06:37 AM

I think I've been highjacked from reality. a. Is this the alison I know (who should be doing other things) and B. does anybody know the words, or should we all just make up a verse?

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: alison
Date: 02 Dec 98 - 07:10 AM

Hi Lyndan,

Yes it's me.... In my defence the lyrics are for Arch Bishop....... that should make slightly more sense now.

Have I redeemed myself?

Slainte

alison

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Bob Schwarer
Date: 02 Dec 98 - 08:36 AM

After a little net search I found that the song is on Cornerstone's album "Lonesome Town". Available from CD Now. I'll probably buy it on the chance there is a lyric sheet.

Bob S.

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: McMusic
Date: 03 Dec 98 - 08:42 PM

What an idea for a song! Love the idea--so much I'm really considering checking out the recording for that one song. It'd be a great one to learn! Be that as it may, however, I'm not sure I'd actually want to SEE such--we've a lot of 'em down here where I live, and I can tell you--it wouldn't be a pretty sight!!!

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Bob Schwarer
Date: 16 Dec 98 - 01:26 PM

Finally got the CD and yes, there is a song sheet. First a commercial. The CD is basically Bluegrass with most of the songs written by members of the group(Cornerstone). Also has a couple of traditional songs. Really a nice CD.

20 Naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac
by Cris Stuart

I was thumbin' my way down to Baton Rouge
Standin' on the side of the road
When a car pulled over and a voice cried out
"We'll take you where you want to go".
I jumped inside, but to my surprise,
They were naked as a poor man's toes.
It was a tight situation when the whole congregation
Said the devil was in my clothes.

Chorus:
Twenty naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac
Brothers and sisters shoutin' in the back.
Elders in the front, choir in the trunk.
twenty naked Pentacostals in a Pontiac.

The sermon that morning was on Adam and Eve
And the ways of the dreadful snake.
Everybody was clappin' when the preacher pointed at me.
My body began to shake.
I threw off my shirt, my shoes and my socks,
My jeans and my BVD's.
We were all in the nude,shoutin' halleloo,
And singin' "Somebody Touched Me."

Chorus

We had the cruise control set to fifty-five
When a Smokey got on our tail.
And the siren began to wail.
We ran off the road toward the tree of life,
Lord, the future was looking bleak.
We hung on and prayed, everybody was saved,
'Cause we all knew how to turn the other cheek.

Chorus:

Bob S.

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Bob Schwarer
Date: 16 Dec 98 - 01:33 PM

Goof Report:

Third verse: After "When a Smokey got on our tail" insert "He pulled up beside, his eyes got wide".

Sorry. The line break was not right and deleted the line.

Bob S.

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentecostals
From: Joe Offer
Date: 13 Apr 99 - 11:43 PM

In the interest of communal inspiration and edification, I think this thread deserves to be refreshed. Hallelujah!
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: catspaw49
Date: 14 Apr 99 - 12:07 AM

Did you give it a nice "Holy Water Shower" Joe???....Perhaps you needed to rename it when you refreshed it, like 20 Naked Pentecostals with Hairy Palms.

GREAT THREAD TO READ.....and a nice little ditty too! Thanks for the refresh.

Quick Story---About 10 years ago the Amish established a small community outside of the tiny village I live in. I was following one of their wagons into town one evening with about 10 of them standing in the bed. As they passed the local Pentecostal church, a group of 15 or so stood staring at the Amish. I said to my friend with me, "Yeah, they're probably going OOOOOO--AMISH." He replied, "Yeah and the Amish are saying OOOOOO--Rollers."

catspaw

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: NightWing
Date: 04 Dec 00 - 12:06 PM

This one really deserves a new refresh. *LOL*

NightWing

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Bill D
Date: 04 Dec 00 - 12:27 PM

...but how did you FIND it?...I thought it was safely buried!

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: kimmers
Date: 04 Dec 00 - 03:16 PM

This... was inspired. I read it to my husband over breakfast and he choked on his Shredded Wheat.

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: NightWing
Date: 04 Dec 00 - 03:54 PM

Sorry, Bill D. Guess I've dug up a skeleton *G* But it was definitely a skeleton that deserved to be dug up.

It was found (and linked to) by Jim Dixon in the Songs you've posted thread currently ongoing.

NightWing

P.S. I hope that link doesn't get screwed up by line breaks. Shouldn't, I guess.

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 04 Dec 00 - 04:03 PM

As for the Constipated men.... CHORUS
There were five (five) constipated men
in the Bible, in the Bible.
There were five (five) constipated men
in the holy books of Moses.

And the first (first)constipated man,
It was Cain - he wasn't Abel
And the first (first)constipated man,
It was Cain - he was not Abel

And the second (second) constipated man
It was Balaam - he couldn't move his ass.
etc.......

3rd - Solomon - He sat for forty years.

4th - Samson - he brought the house down

5th Moses - he took the tablets.

I have happened across a couple of different varants in how it is rendered and theological discussions of who's Ass would not move, but you get the drift!
GtD.

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Luke
Date: 04 Dec 00 - 04:05 PM

here in Ohio they have what are called black bumber Menonites. They are allowed to drive cars only if they are black and all the crome is painted the same.

But did you know that amish youngsters cavort mightaly befor the choose baptism and become official members of the chrch(community).

Sometimes here in my town we hear carrage races and loud laughter in the middle of the night through the town. Boys and girls just having a wild ride.

Amish folks around here all have a half smile when they look at you. I smile fully when I see and talk to them.

They are very friendly and will can tomatoes for me.

Ilike that in a person.

Luke

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From: Burke
Date: 04 Dec 00 - 08:34 PM

LOL! There's a huge Christian music festival held every summer called Cornerstone. I've only heard of it, have no details. When I first heard the name of the band I assumed it was Christian so I have an image of this song being done by some kind of crossover Christian-folk group. Turns out it's bluegrass.

In tring to find more about the band I did find a 30 second clip. Go here

Subject: RE: 20 Naked Pentacostals
From:
Date: 05 Dec 00 - 12:58 PM

Pentecostal is "e" in the middle, and when properly pronounced, reflects that fact. Not "ah". The song is so good, we might as well get that right. A LOL