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BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Liz the Squeak Date: 05 May 05 - 09:21 AM So I guess I get to stay here a bit longer then..... can someone pass me another book please? LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: GUEST,beertender Date: 05 May 05 - 09:51 AM MZ Squeek - I can't seem to fit your book into a glass. May I blenderize it for easier consumption? And did you want that on the rocks or straight up? Is there someone here named Bee-El? (Sounds like a relative of Stuporman!) There's a package here for you and they want to pay us a fee for retroactive shipment! Shall I accept the package and the fee? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: GUEST,MMario Date: 05 May 05 - 10:06 AM I'd avoid the package that the freds dropped off for MOAB - aside from the fact that it appears to be breathing - it looks like it may have teeth as well. and if I may ask - WHO FILLED THE JELLO PIT WITH DRAWN BUTTER! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: GUEST,Stilly River Sage Date: 05 May 05 - 10:20 AM As long as you leave that pit over in Wyoming's doorway I don't mind. But the electric utility folks park at the bottom of my driveway to do their meter reading on this block, and if they have to slip and slide around the jello pit, they may accidentally (on purpose) misread my meter. But wait--MMario, are you sure that's drawn butter? It looks a little too thick, and it's so sweet--you know, I have a sneaking suspicion that it isn't butter, it's honey! Ewwww. . . and over there in Wyoming, why, you're liable to have the modern equivalent of the La Brea Tar Pits--honey with bison and Dahl sheep stuck in it. And, oh! Look! It's an Atwater prairie chicken right at the edge. If that guy goes in we'll have to send someone in to rescue it. Prairie chickens are endangered wildlife! Pull up a lawn chair, this might get interesting. Anyone want more chips? It's cinco de Mayo--great day for a party, Mother MOAB. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: GUEST,Bee-dubya-ell Date: 05 May 05 - 11:26 AM I am afraid I must spend the next few days in the wilds near Birmingham, Alabama trying to make some money and will, thusly, not be able to participate further in the festivities. Ya'll have fun. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: GUEST Date: 05 May 05 - 11:41 AM A Unitarian stumbles in and is speechless, unhinged for an unknown spacetime quantity at the now-you-see-it/now-you-don't astral qualities of the Jello Pit.... relativism unchecked has finally gone critical. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Stilly River Sage Date: 05 May 05 - 04:07 PM Blueberries begin to bob up to the top of the pond of honey. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: SINSULL Date: 05 May 05 - 04:27 PM heh heh...just the tiniest introduction of supersaturated sugar and BOOM! the jello pit is now a pool of congealed honey with berries caught in the miasma. Alice, miffed at the hairball reference, smugly returns to the bar only to find that the UPS man has run for the safety of his truck. No problem. Micca will show up sooner or later hopefully alone. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Rapparee Date: 05 May 05 - 05:51 PM Mmmmmmmmmmmmm...blueberry mead.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: artbrooks Date: 05 May 05 - 05:59 PM Rapper, you rat. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: jacqui.c Date: 05 May 05 - 06:24 PM Has anyone seen Seamus? He was heading toward the.... jello pit............. OOPS! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Rapparee Date: 05 May 05 - 06:30 PM And through the door she walks: red hair, an older woman carrying herself with the bearing of one who brooks no nonsense. The blaster on her hip reinforces the idea and draws eyes to it as she walks up to the bar. "Hooch, sonny," she says to the barwench. "Huh?" is the unfortunate response. "I said, 'Hooch, sonny'," she replies, "and I mean it." Suddenly she draws the blaster and shoves the muzzle in to the bartender's face. "I'm Hazel Mead, and I would like a drink, you understand." The barkeep turns pale. Quickly she opens the charge chamber and extracts.... "Care for a cough drop?" she asks. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: beardedbruce Date: 05 May 05 - 07:31 PM feeling Stone'd, Rapaire? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Amos Date: 05 May 05 - 07:55 PM What a Heinleinous remark, BB!! :D A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Rustic Rebel Date: 05 May 05 - 09:18 PM I'm late, I'm late, for a very important date! I struggled past the great breasts of the North to make the festivities! Lingering upon the nipples, longer than my ancient forefather did, while tripping on a perched perch from the blue waters, and rolling in through the door that was marked, UP, my tounge shot out an innocent, yet slightly incoherent statement.... Tequila! Por Favor! Vasto Vivar La Madre Ante Todos Toroabano!!! Rustico Rebelde is going to the bar! (Is that mariachi music I hear?) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Amos Date: 05 May 05 - 09:30 PM Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaahahah!! Vaya! Vaya! Andalé, Rustica!!!! Que la musica ti transporta por siempre!! Que hay musica en su vida Floricitas, luz y sol Y que sabes que te amo Con todo mi corazaon!! Su madre |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Rustic Rebel Date: 05 May 05 - 10:18 PM ¡Desea vivo la madre de todo el bullshit! ¡Madre Del Feliz Cumpleaños! ¡La celebración es justa un rodillo en el hoyo del jello lejos! Un más tequila con crema del arándano y la música hasta amanecer, es lo que sueño. ¡cP.s. Amos, me plazco verle en un estado de la mente poético tan fino! ¡Debe ser el mead Rapaire del arándano está pasando alrededor! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Rustic Rebel Date: 05 May 05 - 10:29 PM It seems the Babel fish translater deems me incoherent and drunk on tequila too!......Here's what it thought I think I said.... It wishes alive the mother of all bullshit! Mother Of Happy Birthday! The celebration is right a roller in the hole of jello far! A plus tequila with cream of the bilberry and music until dawn, is what dream. P.S. Masters, I please myself to see him in a state of the so fine poetic mind! It must be Mead Rapaire of the bilberry is happening around! Works for me! So who's rolling in the blueberry jello? Oh I mean bilberry! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: jacqui.c Date: 06 May 05 - 06:43 AM The jello pit now contains one very large and soggy yellow lab. Go anywhere near him and he'll lick you to death. There's Alice, sitting on the edge with a smug expression on her face - methinks she might have had something to do with luring him in? I'm not even going to try and get him out yet - more wine please bartender and is there any of that black pepper shortbread out back? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Liz the Squeak Date: 06 May 05 - 07:05 AM Don't blenderize it, just slide it under the door please.... I have all the water I can drink in here, but I need something with a little .... absorbency.... LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Rapparee Date: 06 May 05 - 08:46 AM Oh, geez, LtS is stuck in the Ladies' again. Well, not a problem -- get the barrels of grease ready. Nearby, a crystalline being flutters close to the ceiling, obviously roiled by...something. Hesitantly, a thought comes through: "My name is Prilicla. I would like a drink. Thank you." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: GUEST,MMario Date: 06 May 05 - 08:56 AM oh jeez - don't let Prilicla near Hazel - I'm told she has this "thing" about bugs. Beaker of blueberry mead for the Empath - with a side of spaghetti! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Stilly River Sage Date: 06 May 05 - 10:37 AM Singing is heard coming from the general direction of the parking lot. . . |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: MAG Date: 07 May 05 - 01:08 AM Oh great; a party. I could use a party. Am I allowed to come even if I have never braved the infamous MOAB thread?? My computer is shaky enough as it is. Here are 3 perfromance pieces about chocolate for the jukebox. and some truffle brownies. MAG |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Liz the Squeak Date: 07 May 05 - 04:20 AM I wouldn't say stuck..... more like.... LOCKED!!!! We know a song about that don't we boys and girls!!! Save me a truffle please?! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: jacqui.c Date: 07 May 05 - 07:56 AM Ask Kendall about cod liver oil capsules........ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: MMario Date: 07 May 05 - 08:37 AM Okay - Try a piece of this. It's a layered strawberry desert - slices of pound cake - with a marscapone strawberry layer over that, strawberry curd over that and topped with strawberry whipped cream. Too much? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Liz the Squeak Date: 07 May 05 - 09:28 PM What, no chocolate sauce? LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Stilly River Sage Date: 08 May 05 - 01:24 AM Maybe some of those chocolate dipped strawberries on the side? The huge ones that sit decadently on the plate with their coat of thick hardened chocolate. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Liz the Squeak Date: 08 May 05 - 05:05 AM Hey, they can sit where they like, they're mine and I WILL get them all.... bruauahahhahahahaaaaaaaaa LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: GUEST,Giant Squid Date: 08 May 05 - 12:10 PM Splash, slosh, swish, swish. . . Ah! The food of the gods! Chocolate-dipt cat! Jello pit, here I come! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: GUEST,Seamus Date: 08 May 05 - 01:43 PM Squid in the jello pit? I don't think so - the jello pit's mine, all mine I tell you!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Rapparee Date: 09 May 05 - 11:03 AM My, my. You take a couple days to spend with an old friend and everything crashes. BARKEEP! Hootchenoo! With gunpowder, tobacco juice, and ground habenero peppers! Put it in a glass and give it to LtS! I'll have a good single malt, myself. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: SINSULL Date: 09 May 05 - 11:50 AM "Sweet and Sour Squid! Yum Yum" says Alice. "I'll just sit here on this ridiculous dog's head and lure the slippery beast over. Damn it Seamus! Stop wagging your tail. You're getting berry juice and honey all over me." SINS watches from the bar, JD in hand. That squid looks angry and Alice and Seamus are in her care. She passes a large serving of spicy corn pone cooked with lima beans to LTS. "That will blast you out of there in no time." she promises. "Better hurry though there are only a few truffles left." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: jacqui.c Date: 09 May 05 - 12:25 PM That'll get her out even faster! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Liz the Squeak Date: 09 May 05 - 05:23 PM You seriously want to give me something like that? You better stand clear then!!! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Stilly River Sage Date: 10 May 05 - 12:45 AM Fire in the hole! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Liz the Squeak Date: 10 May 05 - 04:39 AM Here I sit, broken hearted... paid my penny blew the back out of the cubicle and the cistern is now in orbit.... FREE AT LAST!! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Rapparee Date: 10 May 05 - 08:43 AM "Ain't never seen nothin' like it," said the old man. "I wuz jist walkin' down ta the crick an' this here terlet come a-blowin' past, doin' 'bout a million miles a minute, an' a pair of them new-fangled ladies song underwear with it, too. Ain't never seen nothing' like it." And he shook his hoary locks and drank the bottle down. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Stilly River Sage Date: 10 May 05 - 03:07 PM (Liz, you're a good sport!) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Liz the Squeak Date: 10 May 05 - 03:16 PM In the immortal words of Al Jolson.... You ain't heard nothin' yet! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: SINSULL Date: 10 May 05 - 03:38 PM WOW!!! And to think I almost boiled the beans in prune juice. Does this mean that we are back to male and female trees in the backyard or will the elves come and fix the toilet? I need to know before I try the Sweet 'N Sour Squid. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Rapparee Date: 10 May 05 - 03:41 PM Within the discontinuity of MOAB, nothing ever remains broken -- not even hearts. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: GUEST,Plumber Date: 10 May 05 - 04:02 PM Who do I give the bill? Evrythings fixed, ladie - but I couldn't match the 24 caret commode - so had to use platinum. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Stilly River Sage Date: 10 May 05 - 05:20 PM Better put that plumbing job on Bert's card. For a tip, get yourself a good beer at the bar and remember: "Buy low, sell high." I don't see that squid volunteering any body parts for your recipe. Just how are you planning to prepare that dish, SINS? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: Rapparee Date: 10 May 05 - 06:50 PM I can only say, "Oh you squid!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: jacqui.c Date: 10 May 05 - 06:53 PM Well, if Alice can be persuaded I'm sure that the squid body parts can be obtained....... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: SINSULL Date: 10 May 05 - 08:52 PM and the Jello pit is full of honey, a dog, and a cat. A little vinegar and a few spices, a simple blow torch, and the squid lured into proximity - and there we'll have it! Sweet and Sour Squid. Alice, upon hearing the plan removes herself from Seamus' head and knowing Baby Fred's attachment to the silly beast, coaxes Seamus to safer ground while the squid splish-sploshes it's way into the sticky pit. "Blowtorch?" she muses. "No - a hair dryer plugged in, turned on, and tossed into the goo will do the trick." Off she goes in search of electrical appliances while Jacqui wails at Seamus "You stupid damn dog! I just brushed you! Now you're all full of honey and cat hair! Damn! Kendall, come here please...darling. Seamus needs to go out..." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: GUEST,The Giant Squid Date: 10 May 05 - 10:43 PM BURP!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat MOAB Mother's Day Tavern From: MOAB Date: 10 May 05 - 10:43 PM Thanks to all my children and friends for throwing the party. I'm sorry I haven't been able to get here until now. I have a good axcuse, though you'd probably never believe it. Love, Mom |
