BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?

Subject: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 11:06 AM

Reining Prince Hans-Adam II has been begging for an attack for months now. The discontent in Lichtenstein with the government's aristocratic and unresponsive rule is growing by leaps and bounds. When Hans-Adam II moved recently to curtail the airing of Brittney Spears videos on Lichtenstein TV and announced that only 3 more McDonalds franchises would be permitted to open in the principality, he may have gone too far. These desperate moves by Hans-Adam are a very transparent attempt to unite the older, more traditional voting bloc of Lichtensteiners behind him and to stabilize his autocratic rule at the cost of inciting a reactionary movement against democratization and foreign investment.

Hans-Adam II - Threat to the World!


Lichtenstein has been flexing its military muscles threateningly at surrounding nations in western Europe for years now. Its refurbished Panzer IV tank, recovered in 1945 after having been abandoned by retreating Germans, was recently unveiled in a street parade of military might that has caused ripples of concern across the Free World. There is little doubt that Hans-Adam II has the will and the malice to use this Weapon of Mass Destruction. He has demonstrated in the past that he has no reluctance to shed blood in the furtherance of cementing his iron rule upon that unfortunate nation.

Lichtenstein WMD - Photographic Proof!!!

These are provocations that simply cannot be ignored. If we turn our back on a clear and present danger as great as Lichtenstein and Hans-Adam II, we may find that Panzer IV tank rumbling down the streets of Washinton DC one day. Lichtensteiners, driven into a patriotic frenzy by this corrupt and probably insane monarch, have already committed violent acts against America, and these have been documented exhaustively in a 600 page summary by America's top intelligence strategists, which will shortly be submitted to the U.N. Security Council.

The Bush administration is seeking a resolution from the Security Council to require Lictenstein to reveal all its hidden weapons within 30 days or face the possibility of joint military action by an international coalition.

Lichtenstein has replied with defiance and contempt, demonstrating that the Hans-Adam II administration is determined to flout international law, regardless of the consequences. "The 34,604 captive people in Lichtenstein constitute a real and present threat to the entire world," stated President George W. Bush in a press conference yesterday. "They must be rescued from their insane rulers and made free and democratic like us. We are not going to stand idly by and let Lichtenstein push us around with their pastries, their muzzle-loading rifles, and that terrible Panz-zer tank. We are going to stand tall, buckle up, and do whatever we have to to smoke 'em out. Lichtenstein cannot intimidate America or be allowed any longer to menace the peace and security of the community of nations. We are not sending any mixed messages to Hans-Adam the Second. We are drawing a line in the sand."

The world watches with bated breath as this crisis moves to what seems to be a new and more dangerous stage. Will Hans-Adam II see reaon, and allow complete inspections of the tank, the motorcycle shop and the other secret facilites, like the Princely sauna, the castle bakery, and the polo grounds...or will we see War In Lichtenstein?

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 11:09 AM

Sorry, I should have said "a 600 page brief"...

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 11:42 AM

His Prints may be a bit overpriced for pages out of a comic book, but surely Nukeing him is a bit over the top!!
Quack!
Geoff.

link fixed - a link-faerie

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 11:48 AM

That comic is a tool of the Lichtensteinian Secret Service, intended to undermine the morals of young Americans. It also contains coded instructions to Lichtenstein operatives who intend to plant explosive pastries in cities all over America.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 11:56 AM

Six sober squads of the Idaho Legion, all that could be found, have been activated and are undergoing detox at an undisclosed location on the East Coast, according to a new release in today's Local Paper. The paper reports that the units have been equipped with the latest Model 82 Cooey rifles (obtained via the US-Canada Lend-Lease Treaty) and expect to be issued puttees in the latest computer-enhanced camouflage pattern.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: David C. Carter
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 11:59 AM

This is very scary stuff indeed!What scares me more though,will be when Bush makes a stab at trying to say the name"Lichtenstein".

David

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:00 PM

Should have read :-
His Prints may be a bit overpriced ....



I think I mis-typed the HTML Brackets...
Quack!
GtD.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Wolfgang
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:01 PM

Pedant's corner:


- The country is spelled Liechtenstein.
- It has not been occupied in the second world war, so the tank can not come from retreating Germans. We just could not be everywhere :-)
- But that tank may stem from a retreating Russian army, for the not well known First Russian National Army of the German Wehrmacht has crossed the border to Liechtenstein in 1945 to surrender and ask for asylum. It was granted to the poor Russians despite pressures from the USSR.
- Liechtenstein has no army of its own but is defended by Switzerland.

Wolfgang

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:03 PM

It'll be alright if they need to remove stones from horse's hooves, then....
Quack!
GtD.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Ebbie
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:04 PM

Little Hawk, "reining" may actually be more descriptive of his action but may I suggest that 'reigning' is the more common term? :)

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: MMario
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:04 PM

Wolfgang - we all know Little Hawk doesn't live in the same reality as we do; in his world 'Lichtenstein' evidently WAS occupied; and maitains Armed Forces.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:13 PM

And I'd be pretty worried if I lived in Luxemburg. These long words beginning with an L...

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Donuel
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:17 PM

All citizens of Lichtenstien should be considered enemy combatents unless they are wearing liedenhosen uniforms.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:25 PM

There are several impediments to Shrub demonstrating "Shock and Awe" (TM) to Liechtenstein. First (as Wolfgang has noted) is spelling it, second it pronouncing it, and third is finding it.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Donuel
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:31 PM

It was actually Cheney's shock and awe - going back to the first desert storm DU bombardment and foolish detonation of bio weapons...

http://www.countercurrents.org/hall230306.htm

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: jacqui.c
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:35 PM

Somehow I just got this picture in my mind of the shrub in lederhosen. Made me laugh, anyway.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:44 PM

"Liechtenstein". Thank you, Wolfgang. I think it is possible that the tank was salvaged from Austrian territory, just outside the borders of Liechtenstein. It may have been abandoned in the final days, and scooped up by some enterprising Liectensteiners intent on conquering the postwar world.

There's another whole possibility here, though. The Bush administration may have made a simple error of identification and confused Liechtenstein with Luxembourg. "All those places kind of sound the same to me," as Dubya said to Condi the other day.

You have to make damn sure about this sort of thing before kicking off Shock and Awe. Damn sure.

Ebbie - Yes, for Christ's sake, I meant "reigning"! ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:48 PM

Goddammit, it's impossible to spell out the name of that friggin' country more than once without making unintentional typos. I think Bush will have to give up on this entirely and go after some place with a much simpler name. Togo, maybe. Or Oman. Or Spain.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 12:56 PM

What about those members of the Idaho Legion who are currently serving at an undisclosed location on the East Coast?

(Liederhosen: the pants you sing in.)

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Bill D
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 02:38 PM

aww...everyone knows that Andorra is a much greater threat! (Still, I think that Monaco would be a better prize...but don't tell Bushie!)

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Peace
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 02:56 PM

Liechtenstein:

It's OK to 'take out' the country, but heaven forfend any banks are hit. Justa thought.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 02:58 PM

Banks were hit on 911.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Purple Foxx
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 03:01 PM

Does Liechtenstein have any oil reserves?
Don't pick a fight with Switzerland they can render your currency worthless at the flick of a switch.
That's why they only need an army which travels by bike & is armed with a penknife.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Peace
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 03:04 PM

But, you have to admit, it's one helluva knife.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: MMario
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 03:04 PM

Forget Liechtenstein and Andorra - the REAL threat is from Seborga.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Bert
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 03:07 PM

Oil reserves LOL Purp.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Purple Foxx
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 03:09 PM

Thanks Bert.
Seborga annoys Berlusconi,surely that counts in its favour?

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: MMario
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 03:13 PM

when the prime minister literally owns the media of a country he deserves to be annoyed.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Purple Foxx
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 03:16 PM

Exactly MMario, so let's start a Seborga solidarity campaign.
WHAT DO WE WANT?
PRETTY FLOWERS!
WHEN DO WE WANT THEM?
NOW!

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 04:50 PM

A question for Wolfgang: what does "Liechtenstein" mean in English? I know that "stein" means "stone", but....?

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 04:56 PM

Here is a dramatic photo of the Liechtenstein armed forces, preparing to repel any attack upon their sovereign land...

"Now we're getting serious!"

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Q (Frank Staplin)
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 05:01 PM

The real enemy is SARK!

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Rapparee
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 05:19 PM

'Sokay. I have been sent a picture of some of the Idaho Legion (all six sober squads are at an Undisclosed Location On The East Coast) training.

The circumstances behind this picture are Classified.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 05:54 PM

Now, if I was living in somewhere called Umm or Err, then I would be really worried. Given he way he speaks, can't you just hear "It is time we took a stand on err"

* I can't rememeber if the City-state of Ur was in present day Iraq or Iran. So I won't mention it....

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: GUEST,John O'L
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 07:13 PM

The circumstances behind this picture are Classified

Not surprising. The guy bending over who just let that one rip must surely be classified as a genetically enhanced WMD?

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Peace
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 08:17 PM

To say nothing of the guy (who's not IN the picture) crying because he'd been hiding the last bottle of booze in the cannon.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Peace
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 08:30 PM

"When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?"

So, the USA is dating again?

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 30 Mar 06 - 09:57 PM

I don't know when the USA is going to take out Liechtenstein, but I heard that when it happens this is where Liechtenstein will be taken. Seems Uncle Sam spent all his date money on Iraq.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Teribus
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 11:52 AM

LH's photograph of the tank is definitely a Panzer Mk IV and judging by the markings and landscape it was probably a Syrian tank knocked out in 1956 on the Golan Heights. In 1956, Israeli's used 'Heavy' Shermans and British Centurion tanks, the Mk IV with it's 75mm gun would have been no match for either.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 12:40 PM

I believe you're right about that, Teribus. Those Israeli Shermans, did they mount a 90mm gun, as on the M-36 Jackson or the Pershing?

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: frogprince
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 12:40 PM

John O'L, I almost hate you; while I was heading for the posting space to comment on the magnitude of that fart, I found you had beat me to it : } (Great minds do think alike).

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 04:08 PM

The Liechtenstein army is now in a high state of preparedness.

Demonstration of Liechtenstein's deadly firepower...

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 04:18 PM

Another shot of the deadly Panzer IV tank, now fully restored to battle-readiness by the fanatical followers of Hans-Adam II!

The terrible WMD that imperils the entire world!

This is the smoking gun Washington needed. The attack must now go ahead unless Liechtenstein surrenders its WMD immediately and allows full international inspections of all suspected areas, including the royal saunas and dog kennels!

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Bill D
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 04:45 PM

They have a dedicated bunch of local militia in Liechtenstein. They'll be fine.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 05:26 PM

Prince Hans-Adam - an anagram of "Damn Anarch Spie". How blatant can they get with their threats to the Free World.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 06:11 PM

Very perceptive, McGrath. I would have thought it would take a mind like that of our friend Teribus to puzzle that one out. Good work!

These Liechtensteiners have got to be dealt with once and for all. If we don't do it now, it'll just be a whole lot worse later.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 31 Mar 06 - 10:02 PM

A whole lot of wurst? Will there be a whole lot of sauerkraut to go along with it?

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 01 Apr 06 - 06:14 PM

Looks like GW is checking the intel personally LH.

I'm sure that's him just left of the turret in your pic.

Don T.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Apr 06 - 10:01 PM

I have been checking out photos of Liechtenstein. There seem to be lots and lots of pointed things, obviously missiles of various types, camouflaged as church steeples, castle spires, road signs and so on.

This data has been turned over to the CIA, the NSA, the DIA and MI-5 through 9 by Schutzen D-1, Intelligence Corpse, Idaho Legion. It is expected that it will be the foundation for a pre-emptive strike.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 01 Apr 06 - 10:39 PM

No question about it. Good work, Rapaire.

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 02 Apr 06 - 08:38 PM

This Liechtenstein picture should finally sew up the case for action!

Subject: RE: BS: When will USA 'take out' Lichtenstein?
From: Naemanson
Date: 02 Apr 06 - 08:49 PM

I had no idea of the danger. I am so glad the Mudcat is in the forefront of the news.