BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy

Subject: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: GUEST,Please be nice
Date: 09 Aug 06 - 12:48 PM

Anyone had experience with this type of surgery? Recovery time, pain, etc.?

Thank you

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: LilyFestre
Date: 09 Aug 06 - 12:57 PM

A friend recently has surgery for hemmoroids and it did not go well because she relied on a local small town doctor who is a surgeon but not specialized in any one thing (he delivers babies, does C-sections, hernias, cancer surgeries and the list goes on). She is now seeing a specialized doctor and is doing MUCH better. Please be sure you are dealing with someone who is specialized in this area and save yourself tons of pain and heartache.

The doctor she is now seeing said she should have been out of any kind of pain and off pain medication in 2 days. She's been on it now for almost 3 months.

Also, she said the most helpful thing was a "doughnut," a round air cushion seat for you to sit on while you are still healing.

Best of luck to you.

Michelle

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: Bill D
Date: 09 Aug 06 - 01:04 PM

Gee...I had almost forgotten. I had this done..once...maybe 45 years ago. It was only a single item, and gave no particular problems.

A friend of mine had a more serious case, and was a week or two recovering. He didn't like the treatment, but he liked it better than the problem, and felt MUCH better.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 09 Aug 06 - 03:55 PM

It's been a long time ago, and I was much younger and healthier then; but a "school doctor" at my university did a "clean up" on multiples, and I got up and went to my next class straight from the surgery. Aside from a need to be "cautious" about cleanliness and avoiding any "strains" of the area it was sort of a non-event.

(It was a very good school, hence the expectation that he was a very good doctor.)

John

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: GUEST,Please be nice
Date: 10 Aug 06 - 06:11 AM

I want to thank you, everyone of you.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: GUEST
Date: 10 Aug 06 - 07:10 AM

It's a pain in the ass. Had the operation in 1978 and they were back two years later. I fine Prep H works for me and watch your diet.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: GUEST,Bruce Baillie
Date: 10 Aug 06 - 12:06 PM

...No but I once wrote a song about a friend of mine who had, I'll send you the words if you're interested!

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: GUEST,Chief Chaos
Date: 10 Aug 06 - 01:13 PM

No,

But I'm looking forward to one in the 2008 elections!

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: Greg F.
Date: 10 Aug 06 - 02:01 PM

That's more of an anal cyst, Chief.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Aug 06 - 02:47 PM

Meantime, warm sitz baths and a doughnut. Nothing funny about it. You have my sympathy. Been there; done that.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: catspaw49
Date: 10 Aug 06 - 03:34 PM

I know you meant the rubber ring jobbies Sins, but I first got this great image of a guy in a sitz bath munching a chocolate eclair....Couldn't see how that would help much.........well, the creme filling maybe, but, uh..........

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Aug 06 - 04:33 PM

No eclairs! Lots of fiber and water. Go sit in the corner, Spaw. I recommended you for the Wife Swap Show.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 11 Aug 06 - 04:02 PM

"haemorrhoidectomy" Accurate spelling is a pain in the butt!!

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemmerhoidectomy?
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 03:11 PM

No - but I've had my ass in a sling on several occasions...

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: GUEST,Please be nice
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 03:44 PM

A big thank you to Nigel Parsons for catching the spelling. I guess it depends on where one lives, though.

More thanks to everyone else who posted. Thank goodness things have calmed down and it need not happen at this point in time.

With gratitude,

Pbn

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: Troll
Date: 12 Aug 06 - 10:10 PM

Another thing that helps is a hot sitz bath. You can probably buy one at your local pharmacy at the same time you buy the "donut".

My recovery time was almost a month and, yes, there was a helluvalotta pain the first time my bowels moved but that was mostly because they had me packed full of gauze. After that it was fairly easy.

Good luck. I had mine in 1978 and have had very little trouble since although my wife sometimes accuses me of being a haemorrhoid.

troll

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: GUEST
Date: 13 Aug 06 - 05:01 AM

Is that the same thing as a divorce, but perhaps less painful? (sorry...couldn't resist)

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 07:58 AM

Hahahahahahaaaa.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: Bill D
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 11:27 AM

I don't want to see his treatment for corns and fallen arches.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 11:46 AM

HAHAHAHAHAAAA!!! Good one BILL!

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 12:06 PM

Well a friend of mine, now dead, told me that the follow-up was embarassing. It involved cones of increasing diameters. I leave the rest to your imagination, but they wouldn't let her out till she got to the last and largest :(

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: wysiwyg
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 12:58 PM

Gnu,

1) What were you looking FOR in that YouTube search?!?!?
2) Does he use the tool directly on the 'hhroids at the end? Cuz it looks to me like he could.

~Susan

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 02:24 PM

~S~... help.

Wednesday, I had too little beer and toooo much home made coleslaw which contained mainly cabbage - over half a cabbage. And cereal, fruit, whole wheat bread, etc. REALLY fucking healthy stuff. Wednesday morning, after, you know, I worked on replacing a door sill and doorsweep AND the pavement was cold. Two hours of up and down and squating and sitting and laying on my side and the very last time I stood up... SOB!

When you google hammerheads lots of "interesting" stuff comes up.

Well... you asked.

BTW... that donut thingy... webmd.com and all the other medical sites say nope.

It even hurts to laugh, which wasn't any fun when I was thinking of names for my new buddy in the middle of the night.

Hey.... olddude... there's a song there... Hammerhead Blues.

I got a new little buddy.
Where the sun don't shine.
I got a new little buddy.
But he ain't no friend of mine.

I got a new little buddy.
Follows me around.
I got a new little buddy.
Now I can't even go to town.

I got a new little buddy.
But every time I sit down.
My new little buddy.
Really makes me frooooown.

I got a new little buddy.....

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: olddude
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 03:00 PM

can't stop laughing GnU

Hey my brother had them something terrible, anyway the butt doctor gave him a prescription cream that the pharmacy mixed up ... they cleared right up ... I will find out what it is called and post it for you ...

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: GUEST,Bruce Michael Baillie
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 04:41 PM

...No but I once wrote a song called 'Haemorroids? I've got piles of 'em?', about a friend of mine who had, his name is Ke.... well maybe I'd better not tell you? The chorus goes:

They're hurting, they're hurting,
me piles are killing me,
I'll have to go to t'doctors and let him have see,
They're hung down like a bunch o' grapes it's driving me deranged,
excuse me while I go and give me underpants a change!

if anybody wants the words...

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 04:59 PM

I got a new little buddy.
Don't gimmie no smiles.
I got a new little buddy.
This buddy is vile.

I got a new little buddy.
He makes me ache.
I got a new little buddy.
Gotta get some me H.

I got a new little buddy.
And I'm feeling blue.
I got a new little buddy.
And he looks blue too.

I got a new little buddy.
I'm feelin sorry for him.
I got a new little buddy.
Doc's gonna give him a trim.

I got a new little buddy.
Doc says just relax.
I got a new little buddy.
DOC THAT FEELS LIKE AN AXE!

HEY... it's FRIDAY night.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: wysiwyg
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 05:00 PM

Spaw, was it Crack Creme or Buttpaste?

Gnu-- TMFI! WTMFI!

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 05:00 PM

AND... I got nothin better to do. SOB!

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 05:07 PM

Butt... you assked.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: Ed T
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 06:15 PM

I found this funny.

all-i-want-for-christmas-is-a-hemorrhoidectomy

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: wysiwyg
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 06:19 PM

Pbn, I hope you noticed none of this toidy humor came till you indicated you'd gottem the info you needed. No harm meant.

Shame on 'nu, Gnu! :~)

~Susan

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: Jeri
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 06:36 PM

I'd be very surprised if pbn were still interested in this thread after 4 years. I sincerely hope the H-rhoid is long since ectomized!

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: wysiwyg
Date: 29 Oct 10 - 07:41 PM

Misread-- strokebrain

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 30 Oct 10 - 12:57 PM

WWWWWTMI

I went to the walk-in clinic. Gave buddy a quick history. He put on the glove and dipped the Vaseline. I dropped, bent and spread. He said, "Oh my goodness. You can put your pants back on."

Now, at that point, I was thankful he toof off the glove but I also became a tad concerned. Quite the bedside manner, eh? I got a steroid salve for three imes a day after a hot soak. If no results my Monday, revisit and a little carving may be required.

Told ya.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 30 Oct 10 - 01:28 PM

I did come up with a name... Hemerrogue.

Yes, Hemi was the obvious one. But, even tho it does denote large and powwerful, it would not do this guy justice. To wit, I had thought of Pingpong.

Yeah, I know, WTMI.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: BK Lick
Date: 30 Oct 10 - 10:39 PM

I'd recommend trying this approach before considering surgery.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 31 Oct 10 - 12:30 AM

This is an old thread. It should be noted that Joe Offer has done a few hemorrhoidectomies over the years here at Mudcat. Got rid of several pains in the arse.    ;-D

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: Manitas_at_home
Date: 31 Oct 10 - 04:07 AM

I wnet in expecting a consultation about surgery. The doctor pointed out that the risks of surgery outweighed the danger of my condition and said he could tie them off which he proceeded to do before I realised he wasn't going to sedate me or even use anaesthetic gel. I waled out of that office in quite a different manner.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: GUEST
Date: 31 Oct 10 - 06:41 PM

In 1977 I was having trouble walking properly. The surgeon said we should operate but my dad had that done in '56 and said it was the worst thing ever and really was not totally OK. I went to Adele Davis - YES, I did! Vitamins E and B6 and watch the diet more carefully. No problem since. Colonoscopy a few years ago was clean as a .... whatever!

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: Dorothy Parshall
Date: 31 Oct 10 - 07:17 PM

That last was me. Getting computer to behave?? or something...

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 01 Nov 10 - 01:46 PM

I'll report the findings of my study of the procedure this Friday, hopefully.

Saw my family doc this AM. Told him what the walk-in clinic doc said. He asked, "He really said that?" "Yup, he did."

Same deal but my doc put on TWO gloves. He's thorough, that guy. When I spread them he said, "Oh my goodness." and I took to laughing, along with him.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 01 Nov 10 - 02:13 PM

Dot... ain't gonna work if there is a blood clot. Only way is a slice and dice.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 02 Nov 10 - 05:37 PM

Occasionally, increased pressure on external hemorrhoids causes them to break and bleed. This causes a lump (thrombosed, or clotted, hemorrhoid) to form. You may suffer from severe pain at the site of the clotted hemorrhoid.

A procedure to relieve the pain can be performed in a health professional's office or outpatient clinic. The health professional applies local anesthesia and then makes a small incision where the lump has occurred to remove the clot and reduce pressure and pain. The procedure works best if it is done less than 4 or 5 days after the clot has formed.

If the pain is tolerable, you may choose to wait to see a health professional. The pain usually goes away in a few days. After 4 or 5 days, the pain from cutting and draining the hemorrhoid is usually worse than the pain from the clot.
****************************************************************

WHAT? No, really? Noooooo. NOOOO! Aggggghhhhhh!

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: ragdall
Date: 02 Nov 10 - 10:00 PM

Looks as if there are not many at Mudcat who are still perfect assholes? Er.. I meant "have", not "are". Yeah that was what I meant.

Making this a music thread, I've been humming the song "Colorectal Surgeon" by Bowser & Blue, which, if you are so inclined, you can watch Bowser & Blue perform on YouTube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_43f9RzAqMM"

rags

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: GUEST,Guest from Sanity
Date: 03 Nov 10 - 12:47 AM

Yeah, We had a Pelosi removed....it felt great!

GfS

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 05 Nov 10 - 11:14 AM

Why, yes, I have, at 10:20 AM...

Doc and nurse enter. Small talk. Doc washed the blood away (it's been bleeding a few days, which actually hepled relieve the pressure and thus eased the pain) and cleansed the area. He said he was going to do the freezing, which is the usually the most painful part. The nurse said, "You can grab the side of the table if you want." I did, tightly.

About twenty seconds later he asked me how I was doing. I asked, " Did you start yet?" and the nurse looked at me, surprised. Shortly, the doc said the freezing was alomost done... I felt nothing.

He cut. I felt nothing. He squeezed I felt nothing. He "poked and squeezed" which was slightly more uncomfortable than a prostate exam.

I was handed a sanitary napkin and instructed how to use it. I got dressed as the doc was leaving. As I was leaving, I said to the nurses in the hallway, "Well, it's been a slice, thanks." Always leave em laughing.

It's been 1:40h since the freezing and I don't have much pain but the doc gave me a prescription for Tylenol 3, so..... we'll see.

Whack a blood though.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: gnu
Date: 05 Nov 10 - 02:50 PM

Almost 5 hours and no pain to speak of. Although, I do stand up to cough.

Advice for those told they are gonna have one... er, not have one as the case in point.

After it was done, certain things were told to me which should have been told to me BEFORE the surgery...

Get the doc to give you the prescription for pain killers BEFORE the surgery. Driving to the drug store and asking the little girl who takes the prescription if it can be speeded up because you just had surgery, you are bleeding and you don't know when the freezing is coming out doesn't help when she has to deal with more than one customer at a time... I am thankful she wasn't chewing gum or I would still be there. It was only when I coughed loudly that she went to check and found the pain meds sitting in a tray which I had been eying for FIVE MINUTES! grrrrrrrr

Get sterile gauze pads (4"X4"), sanitary napkins, diapers, fruit, green veggies, fruit juices, metamucil, Polysporin (antiseptic salve), suppositories, Sitz bath, epsom salts, baby wipes, and iodine BEFORE the surgery. You may not need them all, but... wait for it... yeeeessss... cover yer ass!

Oh yeah, I called Mum earlier to let her know how things were going. It's a rainy and windy day and she can't get outside for a walk. I asked her if she was getting bored. She said she was just watching TV and puttering and then asked me if I was bored. I replied that I was doing much the same thing... just arsin around.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: maeve
Date: 05 Nov 10 - 02:57 PM

Feel much better soon, gnu.

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: Leadfingers
Date: 05 Nov 10 - 10:23 PM

Mate of mine was in Cornwall - Made a comment to a local about 'visitors' - Emmetts or Grockels ?? Local says " No ! We call them Haemerroids , 'cos they come down in bunches . turn red and are a pain in the arse !"

Subject: RE: BS: Ever had a hemorrhoidectomy
From: Leadfingers
Date: 05 Nov 10 - 10:30 PM

Hope you had a good nights sleep Gnu !!